“No, she has no interest in me. You are in luck, because now you will not have to explain to her why you offered her Viscount Linwood’s heir as an untitled man.”
“I suspect that conversation would not go over very well,” Richard agreed, unable to contain his relieved smile.
He enjoyed being Brianna’s only option for marriage, and he would have to continue reminding her why he was the correct choice for her. Tomorrow would give him another opportunity to propose to her. He could only hope and pray the more she heard it, the more likely she would be to accept him.
Brianna awoke with overwhelming abdominal pain. Jumping up, she raced to the chamber pot to perform her new morning ritual. The pain was increasing and becoming unpredictable in its timing. Back on the bed, she began to believe it was time to tell someone about this illness. She only wished to wait another week. Lady Laramie’s ball was in such a short time, and she refused to miss it.
All her life she heard of Lady Laramie’s balls, and she was excited for the opportunity to attend this year. Every year Lord and Lady Laramie assigned a theme to the ball based on one of the exotic places they visited. The theme this time was a rainforest, and Brianna could not wait to experience it. Lady Laramie was known for her extravagance as well as her incredible hospitality.
A knock at the door signaled Martha’s arrival, so Brianna didn’t bother to get out of bed or mask her pain. Martha would be pleased she decided to tell someone about her illness. Calling out for Martha to enter, she was surprised to hear a gasp that was not her maid’s traditional welcome. Lifting her head, Brianna groaned to see Ashley standing at the foot of the bed, her face grave.
“Brianna, are you all right?” Ashley wrung her hands.
“Not exactly,” Brianna rasped, pulling herself up to sit on the side of the bed. “You must promise me you will not tell anyone.”
“First, tell me exactly what complications you are having, and then I shall decide if I need to notify anyone.”
Brianna didn’t like her options, but she didn’t feel up to arguing. She opened her mouth to tell Ashley what had been going on when another wave of nausea hit her. Clamping her hand over her mouth, she ran behind the dressing screen.
After the worst passed, she hesitated, her face burning in embarrassment. She didn’t want to face Ashley now. Taking a deep breath, she hung her head and stepped out from behind the screen. Without looking in Ashley’s direction, she threw herself onto the bed.
“How long has this been going on?” Ashley went to her side.
“Several days,” Brianna mumbled, curling onto her side so her responses would be intelligible. Fighting through the pain, she peered up at Ashley, and saw horror frozen on her friend’s face.
“What else are you experiencing? Tell me everything, so I may help you.”
“I’m not suffering any other physical afflictions. This sickness has been only in the mornings until recently.”
Ashley’s mouth popped open and her eyes grew wide as she assessed Brianna.
“Now, you must be completely honest with me. Have you allowed a gentleman to take liberties which should only be offered to your husband?” Ashley asked bluntly.
Brianna sucked in her breath, her heart pumping wildly. How did Ashley know?
“Oh, Brianna,” Ashley moaned, falling onto the bed beside her. “Please tell me I’m wrong, and you were not so foolish. Did you not think this could happen?”
“I’m not sure I know what you are talking about.” Brianna turned around so she could see Ashley’s face. Obviously Ashley had an idea of what was happening to her.
“When was the last time you experienced your menses?”
“Let me think.” Brianna began to calculate the last time she was indisposed. Shock ran through her body. It had been around six weeks. This was the first time she had not been afflicted every month. “It can’t be.”
“There can be no other explanation,” Ashley confirmed.
Brianna gently touched her flat stomach as if she could feel the life growing inside her. Could it be? Was she with child? Ashley seemed so sure, and, she had to admit, it did seem plausible.
Together with Richard, she had created a baby. Indescribable joy flooded her at the thought of having his baby. She saw herself holding a brown-haired, blue-eyed boy.
Almost as quickly as the delight came, it disappeared. This changed everything. Now there was no denying her ruined status, and soon everyone would know. Her perfect future vanished and only left her with two possibilities. She could marry Richard, assuming he still desired to. Considering the scandal this could possibly create, he may have changed his mind. She would be a marchioness, and her freedom lost.
The other option was distasteful. She could live at home as a spinster for as long as her parents’ generosity lasted, then she would be cast out, condemned to the life of a working woman and raising her child alone. Regardless of what she chose, her dreams were gone. When she was younger, her mother had always told her the reckless behavior would one day get her into more trouble than she could get out of. Her mother had been right.
“What do I do?” Brianna pleaded, turning her gaze to Ashley.
“You only have one option. Who is the father?”
Brianna hesitated, not wanting Ashley to think any less of Richard for this. “Since you will soon discover it, I shall tell you, but you are not allowed to pass judgment on him. He isn’t at fault. I sort of seduced him.”
“What? How could you do that? Did you not understand it would lead to marriage?”
“I did, but at the time, I was not aware of the gentleman’s family name.”
“Lord Stonemede?” Ashley exclaimed, then the shock drained away, and she narrowed her eyes. “I should have suspected by the way you were acting around him. How can I not blame him? He lied to you. Or maybe this was his plan from the beginning.”
“It was not like that.” Brianna jumped to his defense.
Ashley pressed her lips together but didn’t comment further.
Another wave of nausea struck, forcing her to once again cross the room. She grew vaguely aware of a knock at the door and voices, but at the moment she could have cared less if King George III strolled into her bedchamber. Lying on the floor, she enjoyed the feeling of the cool surface upon her overheated face.
After a short time, Ashley appeared behind the screen.
“Come along. You must get up,” Ashley commanded.
“Who was at the door?” Brianna propped herself on her elbows. Something in Ashley’s tone worried her.
“Martha. Don’t worry. I have instructed her to bring you some dry bread and water. It may help soothe your stomach.”
“Thank you.” Brianna felt overwhelmed with gratitude for Ashley’s understanding.
“You are welcome. Now, let us get you back into bed. Martha is already concerned enough over your health. If you wish to keep your condition a secret, you are going to have a lot of work to do.”
Brianna accepted Ashley’s assistance to her feet and made her way over to the bedside table. Keeping the secret from Martha would prove difficult, but since the girl had not demonstrated she could be trustworthy, Brianna would have to do whatever necessary to hide her condition. Before Martha arrived with the bread, Ashley worked on Brianna’s appearance, trying to make her more presentable. When Martha returned, she gave Brianna a wide smile, and Brianna assumed their ministrations worked.
“How are you feeling this morning, my lady?” Martha asked as she sat the tray onto the table.
“I’m more myself today,” Brianna responded with a light smile.
“We are hoping her upset stomach is due to hunger and nothing more,” Ashley added quickly. “Brianna, why do you not try some bread while Martha and I decide what you should wear today?”
“Very well.” Brianna eyed the tray distastefully. As she picked up a piece of dry bread, she hoped Ashley would not choose an uncomfortable garment. As Martha returned holding a pale lavender
gown, Brianna quickly shoved some of the bread in her mouth, for it would not do for Martha to observe her reluctance.
“Would you care to wear this one today, my lady?” Martha asked.
Brianna nodded as she worked on swallowing the dry crumbs. The gown was perfect, and she was relieved at their choice.
Once Brianna dressed, she began to feel better. This morning had been worse than the others, and she was grateful the bread helped, so she could behave in a normal manner today.
“You look much better,” Ashley proclaimed cheerfully.
“I do feel better as well.”
“I’m glad to hear that,” Ashley expressed. “I imagine your increased hunger in the morning is due to your lack of proper eating the previous night. I encourage you to eat more, but in the event you forget, perhaps Martha could bring you some bread and water each morning.”
“I would be happy to. I’m so relieved to hear she isn’t ill. I have been so worried these past days, and not being able to tell anyone has been difficult.” Martha held her hand over her chest.
“It would still be a good idea to keep this to yourself. I don’t imagine Lady Brianna would care for everyone to know of her situation since there is no reason for concern,” Ashley advised, using her teaching voice.
“You can count on me. I would hate to cause any embarrassment,” Martha agreed, nodding her head. Brianna knew Martha enjoyed having a secret, but she also knew how much Martha preferred everyone know she had a secret. It was the fastest way to spread rumors. Brianna would have to work hard to do whatever necessary to disprove any speculations being spread around.
“I’ll be downstairs if you need me,” Ashley informed them.
“Thank you again,” Brianna replied, to which Ashley nodded in response. As the door closed, Brianna turned her attention back to Martha. The girl’s youth and inexperience made it easier for her to accept the story, which suited Brianna nicely. Martha’s low humming as she fixed Brianna’s hair made her feel more at ease. She began to believe Martha would not pose a serious threat to her secret getting out.
The next problem she would face was Richard. Although Brianna agreed Ashley’s assessment was conceivable, her friend was unmarried and young, so she could not have as much knowledge about child bearing as she let on. The possibility existed she was wrong, and Brianna refused to condemn herself with unconfirmed data. Before she spoke to Richard, she wanted to be absolutely certain. Therefore, a second, more experienced, opinion was necessary. The only problem was she had no idea who to ask.
Throughout the morning, Brianna worried over who could advise her, and she didn’t like her options. In the end, she decided on speaking with Ashley. Although she didn’t wish to hurt Ashley’s feelings, she had no choice.
Approaching the schoolroom, Brianna heard carefree laughter and was struck by how odd the sound seemed to her. In such a short time, everything had become so complicated, and the thought life continued as normal felt strange. Knowing she would never be able to enjoy another carefree day brought an ache from deep within her.
Putting on the happiest expression she could muster, Brianna entered the room.
“Good morning,” Brianna said brightly.
“Good morning, Bree.” Grace’s voice was full of laughter. “You are missing a good lesson on how to flirt properly.”
“I’m sorry to have missed it.” Brianna didn’t add how she had witnessed her sister’s flirting in action, and that she needed no further instruction.
“Are you here to take lessons?” Grace asked.
“No. I was simply hoping to speak with Miss Ashley, but if you are in the middle of an important lesson, I can come back at another time.” Brianna tried not to let disappointment show through her words.
“That isn’t necessary. Grace and I were about to take a break anyway,” Ashley explained, then turned to Grace. “I have a good idea. You can go ask Lady Elizabeth if she would care to visit Gunter’s with us for an ice.”
“That is a wonderful idea.” Grace beamed and then turned to Brianna with pleading eyes. “Would you like to come with us, too? It will be so much fun.”
“I would love to join you,” Brianna replied, smiling at Grace’s happy screech. Brianna always enjoyed Gunter’s ices. However, today the mere mention of it had her craving one as she never had before.
“I’ll ask her, and then we will wait in the drawing room for you two. Don’t be long,” Grace ordered, before skipping from the room.
“She is very excitable.” Ashley shook her head in an indulgent manner.
“The idea of her going out into society and flirting with gentlemen terrifies me. She is still young, but I don’t believe I’ll ever see her as anything but a child.”
“I understand what you mean, but don’t worry about her. She will be prepared. I intend to take very good care of her.”
“I’ll hold you to that,” Brianna promised, never more grateful they decided to keep Ashley around.
“Now, what is it you wished to speak to me about? Are you feeling all right?”
“Yes, thank you. I was just wondering how sure you were about me being with child?” Brianna kept her voice barely above a whisper. Ashley’s eyes darted to the door, then she crossed the room to close it and slide the bolt into place. When she returned to her chair, she was wringing her hands, and her eyes were full of sadness.
“I can’t say exactly as I’m not overly familiar with the condition.”
“You appear to be more familiar with it than I. Mother has not told me anything, and I don’t imagine she will choose to until I’m wed.”
“I have heard some mention here and there, but I was never told exactly either. The majority of the knowledge I have gained is from . . . personal experience.”
Brianna sucked in her breath as she brought her hand to her chest. Ashley had a child? She had thousands of questions, but she observed the pain on Ashley’s face and had no desire to increase it. If Ashley chose not to confide in her, Brianna would not press, for she most likely had good reasons.
“I see,” Brianna acknowledged, once she contained her shock.
“I’m sure you are wondering where my child is, for it would be my first question as well. I lost him in the early months of carrying him. I had barely learned I was with child before he was lost to me.”
“I’m so sorry.”
“It was several years ago. I’m at peace with it now. Regardless, I was attended to rather closely, and the midwife assured me I would still be able to bear children in the future.”
“I’m glad to hear it.” Brianna felt her friend’s pain. She knew if she carried Richard’s child, losing the life that was a part of him would devastate her. Although the appearance of a child now severely altered her future, she would never wish any harm to come to the unborn babe.
“I was very lucky to be taken care of by such a good midwife.”
“Do you suppose you could take me to see her? I’m sure a midwife could tell me with absolute certainty if I was with child or not.”
“That does sound like a good idea if you don’t have a preference regarding which midwife you see,” Ashley stammered, biting her lip.
“What do you mean? I’m not familiar with any midwives, so I have not developed any preferences in that area.”
“I have a feeling you have heard of Madam Hershal.”
Ashley was right. Ever since Brianna could remember, she had heard whispers about Madam Hershal. She was once a well-respected midwife, however, rumors spread that she dabbled in witchcraft. Although proof had never been brought against her, her popularity decreased as people didn’t wish to associate with her considering the allegations.
“I have heard of her. The rumors were quite scathing, but as they are only hearsay, I will not pass judgment. In addition, it’s also said she is proficient at her practice, so I have no objections to seeing her.”
“Then I’ll make the arrangements. If we are lucky, we should be able to visit her tomor
row.”
“Thank you.” Brianna sighed in relief. Tomorrow she would have her answer, and her doubts would be eradicated. Then she would be able to take assessment and develop a plan for her future. Today, however, she was going to forget her worries and spend one last day in ignorance.
Richard walked through the remnants of his kitchen, wincing at the sound of the delicate porcelain crunching under his feet. Being awoken with the panic of a fire, and working hard to contain it before it spread was not the way he preferred to spend his mornings. As he assessed the damage, he praised the efficiency of his staff. Together they managed to extinguish the fire quickly, isolating the damage to the kitchen.
“My lord,” Hopkins said. “There is nothing more requiring your immediate attention. You are exhausted. I’ll have a bath drawn for you at once.”
“I want answers first. Send the staff out. I will not have anything moved until I discover the cause of this.”
“Yes, my lord,” Hopkins replied, bowing. With a few quick orders to the other assembled servants, Hopkins cleared the room.
As he walked, Richard surveyed the kitchen closely. The damage was not only from the fire and the smoke but from the water used to put it out as well. He noted the majority of the destruction centered around the stove, so thankfully there was no structural damage to the house to address. Although the sight was horrific, upon closer inspection, everything could be fixed.
After examining the room from every angle, it was apparent someone had not only left an unattended fire in the stove, but the excess logs were piled too close. The remaining question was whether this was an accident or an attack. If an attack, it was not very well thought out considering the minimal damage. However, looking at the cause, there was a probability of it being an accident, but it could easily have been designed to look as such.
Knowing Kirkwood remained out there, lurking in the shadows, Richard could not discount anything. Before making a determination, he needed more information. He rubbed his forehead and let out a sigh. Hopkins would have more luck interrogating the staff, so Richard left it up to him. Although hating the inaction, there was nothing more Richard could do here, so he climbed the stairs looking forward to the bath Hopkins had mentioned.
His Perfect Bride Page 17