The World's Worst Boyfriend

by Erika Kelly

  Move in with me. He’d said it with that gentle, confident smile. He’d been steering the relationship all along, and she hadn’t noticed.

  Yeah, because she’d been busy. She had major issues on her mind. Marriage? You’ve got to be kidding me. “My roommate took a job out of state, and I couldn’t afford the rent on my own.” It sounded like she’d used Julian, but that hadn’t been her intention. “Between finals and graduation, not having a full-time job—and then losing my roommate…” She’d been focused on herself. “I jumped when he offered to let me move in.” She had to own her self-involvement. “I got a break from paying rent, an opportunity to hang around the movers and shakers in the art world and…I took it.”

  But she’d never meant to hurt Julian. She certainly hadn’t meant to take advantage of his feelings for her. “From my perspective, I was moving in with him until I found a new roommate.”

  “And from his perspective he was heading toward marriage?”

  “I guess.”

  When the truck hit the incline at the base of the mountain, Fin shifted gears and floored it. She braced a hand on the dashboard.

  “You guess?”

  “I’m sorry, when exactly did you get your law degree, counselor?” Why did he care about any of this? “What’s with the questions?”

  “Jesus, Callie. You got close enough to someone to marry him.”

  “It’s been six years. What did you think would happen?”

  “I thought you’d come back.” His impassioned voice filled the cab with furious energy.

  The words hit her skin like sparks from a bonfire. Panic had her batting them away, because she didn’t know what to do with them. On the one hand it was unbearably sweet and touched her in a way that made her want to weep. But on the other hand…

  He pulled off the road onto Boner’s Ledge and jerked the truck into Park. When he cut the engine, the sudden silence buzzed in her ears. He didn’t wait for her to get out of the truck, just swung around the front and struck off.

  I thought you’d come back.

  On the other hand…he could go to hell. She shouldered the door open and followed him to the edge of the cliff that offered a panoramic view of the valley. Pockets of lights revealed the scattered towns, the largest clusters from Jackson and Calamity. “Come back to what exactly? More chances for you to blow off my plans so you can travel with your brothers? No, thank you. I get that the prom hardly compared to big, important Bowie events, but it mattered to me.”

  “I know it mattered. Of course it did.”

  “No, Fin. It didn’t. I don’t care what you say, your actions told the truth. You bailed on me.”

  “I’d planned on going to the prom. I’d rented a tux. But Coach couldn’t be two places at once, and Will needed my help at that last competition of the season. Those points put him at the top spot.”

  “Do you even get that you just proved my point? Will’s competition was more important than our senior prom.”

  She waited for it to sink in. And when he winced, she knew it had.

  “I know you loved me. And you were a good boyfriend in many ways, but how many times did you drop me to go running when your brothers called? I’m done with that, Fin.”

  “I was seventeen. You can’t hold those choices against me now. You think I haven’t learned my lesson? Trust me, I fucking learned.”

  The truth welled up so hard and fast it spilled over before she had a chance to check it. “You can’t learn. It’s not even your fault. It’s just too ingrained in you to keep up with them. Fin, you slept on the trail when they started rappelling out Will’s window to avoid you.”

  “I was a little kid.”

  “That’s what I’m saying. That’s how ingrained in you it is. What you want more than anything is your brothers’ respect.” She got right up in his face. “More than you want me.”

  “That’s not…true.” His voice broke on the last word, and he twisted away from her, staring out at the valley. “Dammit.”

  “I’m not blaming you. I’m not even angry, because I understand. I really do. But the thing is, I’m not some high school girl hoping like hell her boyfriend doesn’t blow off prom. I’ve got a real life now. I’m starting a career. I won’t ever go back to the days when your plans trump mine. Do you understand that?”

  He scraped a hand through his hair. “Yeah. Sure.” He drew in a deep breath. “I just…I never thought you’d move on. I didn’t think it was possible.”

  “You thought I was pitching a six-year tantrum?”

  He smiled, but it held a note of embarrassment. “I guess so.” But the smile fell away. “I mean, no. I knew you were living your dream.” He toed a pine cone closer and then kicked it off the ledge. “I just thought you’d come home afterwards.”

  His guarded expression made her heart ache. God, what a complicated mess. Part of her wanted to hate him, part of her recognized the man he’d become, and another bigger, messier, and stickier part still loved him.

  How could she not? He was handsome, sexy, smart…loyal, brave…he was everything a man should be. He just…he couldn’t be completely hers.

  Gazing out across the valley, he let out a bitter laugh. “I guess I just don’t get how you can move in with some other guy. How you can settle for anything less than what we had.”

  That snapped her out of it. “Because I don’t want what we had. I never want that kind of crazy relationship ever again. I want…”

  “Yeah, I know. You want Man-Bracelet.”

  “That’s not what I was going to say. Just give me a minute to get my thoughts together.”

  “No.” He whipped around. “I don’t want to talk to Calliope right now. The woman who has to think about her words before she says them. I don’t want you to ‘process’ your feelings. I want you to let them rip. Remember, Callie? How you’d figure out your shit just from ranting at me? So rant. Just be fucking real.”

  “This is me being real, but you don’t want to accept it. You want me to be wild and fun and free, but I’m not those things anymore. I’m twenty-three, and I have bills to pay and a career to build. I have grown-up problems, and I don’t want to have a relationship where all we do is fight and—”

  “Fuck.”

  A rumble of desire churned in her core. Unwelcome desire. “Make up. I don’t want that kind of…”

  “Passion?”

  “If that’s your definition of passion, then no, I don’t want it. Look, we’re built differently. I know I was pretty wild around you, but that’s not my real nature. I’m a quiet person. But you just…bamboozled me. It’s what you do. You make everyone feel like the most special person in the world.”

  “If you felt like the most special woman in the world, it’s because you are. You’re my heart, Callie. And I can promise you this, I’ve never had this kind of ‘passion’ with any other woman because I’ve never felt for anyone the way I felt for you. You were the center of my universe.”

  “You don’t get it. You never will, so let’s stop talking about.” She rubbed her arms, even though she wore fleece under his leather jacket. “We should get going.”

  She started for the truck, but she didn’t get more than a few feet when he stalked towards her. “You were your best self around me. You let down your guard and got to be everything you truly are. You know how I know? Because it’s when you don’t feel safe that you’re quiet. And that passion you don’t want? That’s who you are. And just because you decided to shut it off doesn’t mean it’s gone.”

  “What we had isn’t…” How did she explain? “It isn’t a mature love.”

  “You mean it isn’t safe.”

  “You make it sound like that’s a bad thing. I could count on Julian. You don’t know how much I appreciated that.”

  “Yeah, I see that. He’s a real dependable guy.”

  He got her there. “Well, I thought I could.”

  “Guess what, Callie? Love isn’t safe. It’s messed up and crazy and it h
urts like hell. But why would you want anything less than what we had? Jesus, what we had—it was more than love. It was…Goddammit. Why do I have to explain this to you? I’m empty without you, and no other woman, no friend or brother—no one can take your place. You’re part of me. And I’m sorry but I’m not buying that you’ve moved on. We screwed up, and we got lost, but I will be damned if I accept that you’d rather have some boring, bland relationship than me.” He reached for her, pulling her hard against him, gaze focused on her mouth.

  Slowly, he leaned in, overwhelming her with his masculine scent. He pressed a soft, gentle kiss that sent an alarming rush of desire through her body. A lick of his tongue across her lips had her mouth opening to him, welcoming him, and then it happened.

  Fin kissed her. Kissed her the way he always had—hungry, desperate, a barely contained expression of carnal need.

  He kept his hands to himself, their mouths the only point of connection. His kiss tasted sweet like love, hot like passion, like everything beautiful in the world grew out of this, the tender intimacy of two souls finally, finally rejoining.

  The moment she reached for him, restless for the press of his hard body against hers, he tore his mouth away. “You wanna settle for less than that?”

  CHAPTER TEN

  The alarm went off, nearly giving Fin a heart attack. He’d barely slept last night. Every time he’d start to drift off he’d remember her mouth, the luscious stroke of her tongue, leaving his body vibrating with voltage.

  Swiping the screen to silence his phone, he rolled out of bed. In the darkness, he made his way to the bathroom, tripping over his running shoe. Dammit.

  He needed to train today, not help Callie put his meme on display for the entire town to see. The town that already saw him as a hellion. The punk son of a billionaire. He grabbed his shorts, jammed his feet into his running shoes, and headed downstairs.

  Both his brothers stood by the front door, illuminated by the single lamp on the table in the foyer. “What’re you guys doing up so early?”

  Will shrugged. “I like training with you. Keeps me on track.”

  Pride punched him hard, and he bit down on a smile. “Cool. Let’s do this.”

  Brodie opened the door to darkness, and the three of them crossed the wide porch and trampled down the steps. Fin took the lead. It never got old knowing his brother—a Freeskiing champion—needed his help.

  Too bad Gray’s not here. He’d been on his way home for Ryder’s wedding when a tsunami hit off the coast of Japan. He and his posse had changed their travel plans to catch the swells in Hawaii. Hopefully, he’d be home before Brodie left so all four brothers could be together.

  “Where’d you go last night?” Brodie said.

  He didn’t want to talk about it. They’d never understand.

  “You good?” Will asked. “With letting Callie go ahead with her museum?”

  “Like you said, the more noise I make, the more attention I draw to myself.”

  “Right. Cool.” Will picked up the pace as they rounded the bend in the driveway.

  As soon as the meme faded away, the magazine might reconsider him for the cover. Just thinking about it stirred up hope. He wished he didn’t care that much.

  At the end of the driveway, his brothers pulled back. “What’s up?” Since their ranch backed onto National Forest, turning three hundred thousand acres into an endless playground for them, they usually worked out on the property. “There’s a trail behind the elk preserve that has great rises. I’ve been using it for interval training.”

  Dawn broke over the horizon, sending a wash of pale yellow light across the land and highlighting a huge tri-fold poster board set up on two metal folding chairs beside the mailbox.

  Crudely drawn arrows pointed toward their property, as if it were a stop on the map of the stars homes. An enlarged photograph of Fin shirtless, wearing sunglasses and a cocky smile, took up the center board. Images of women ugly-crying were glued all around him. In bold, black Sharpie someone had written: Stop here to see the World’s Worst Boyfriend!

  His brothers’ laughter filled the early morning quiet.

  A shock of hurt nearly took out his knees. “Fuckers.” He gave Brodie—the nearest asshole—a shove. But another glance at the sign had him cracking a smile. So they wanted to play? It’s on. “Mount Motherfucker it is.” He took off in the opposite direction, toward the trail that shot up the mountain at a sixty degree angle.

  “Hey,” Will called. “You said we were doing interval training.”

  The five-year age difference meant Fin could kick his brother’s ass with stamina and endurance. He looked forward to watching Brodie, who didn’t work out nearly as much as the others thanks to a desk job in Utah, puke at the summit.

  “Dammit, Fin,” Brodie shouted.

  Fin sprinted ahead, Callie’s What you want more than anything is your brothers’ respect. More than you want me running on a continuous loop in his mind.

  Whatever. He couldn’t control Callie’s feelings. He couldn’t get his asshole brothers to see him as anything more than an adrenaline-junkie with a death wish.

  The only thing he could control was his own damn life. When he got to town, he’d talk to some of Traci’s friends. Get someone to jump on social media and explain that they’d never dated. Then, he’d get Brodie to film him training—maybe doing flips on the trampoline. It was bullshit, but if it got the focus off the meme and back on his athleticism, he’d do that crap all day long.

  Fin showed up to work sweating. Already an hour late, he didn’t want to stop for a shower at Megan’s yoga studio. He’d check in with Callie first, see what she needed.

  He opened the door to a hive of activity. Damn, she worked fast. Had she only started this project a little over a week ago? Displays filled two of the walls and hung from the ceiling in an explosion of color. A kid crouched under the library table in the center of the room with a multiple-outlet surge protector.

  Callie stood at the far wall, talking with a grizzled older man. When she glanced towards the door, her gaze snagged on Fin. Taking in his soaked T-shirt and athletic shorts, her good mood faltered.

  As he approached them, Fin recognized their high school’s A/V teacher. “Mr. Martin.”

  “Fin Bowie.” He grasped his hand and gave a hearty shake. “I thought I told you to keep out of trouble.”

  “I’m trying, sir.”

  “Not nearly hard enough, apparently.” His white teeth peeked out of a thick, heavy beard.

  “Mr. Martin’s helping me with the electronics.” She gestured to the boy under the table. “And his summer school students, too.”

  “Nice.” The cool air rapidly dried his skin. He needed water. “Let me grab some water, and you can put me to work.”

  As he walked away, he heard Mr. Martin say, “I think we’re all set. We’ll be back tomorrow with the supplies, and we’ll get things up and running.”

  Fin hit the drinking fountain against the far wall and sucked in the ice cold water.

  A clatter of rubber soles on the wood floor accompanied Callie as she walked the teacher and his students to the door. “Thank you so much.” She gave the old man a hug. “You’ve just made my exhibition a lot more interesting.”

  “This is the fun stuff.” The older man gave Fin a wave before heading out with his students.

  Once they were alone, Fin scanned the large room. “What can I do?”

  She watched him for a moment, obviously disappointed.

  “Sorry I’m late. When I got home after my run I found a house full of contractors and architectural plans. Did I tell you about Brodie’s idea to turn the ghost town into a tourist attraction? It’s actually pretty good. He’s going to make it a living history museum.” She’d like that. “He’s going to restore the buildings and turn them into a working saloon, hotel, and mercantile. It’ll be cool. The workers will dress in costume, and we’ll have shoot-outs scheduled every couple of hours. It’ll bring a bunch of j
obs to town.”

  She held up her hand. “I don’t want to hear about your brother’s plans. You’re on my time right now, okay?” Her look said, Don’t you get it? “It’s not about taking a picture so I can show the board members I created an exhibition. It has to be successful. It has to draw visitors. And if I have to expend a single ounce of energy wondering if you’re going to show up, then just go and choose another project to meet your court-ordered hours.”

  Clarity struck him right in the solar plexus.

  All these years, they’d been talking at each other. In his mind and heart, he knew he loved Callie. He’d taken for granted she’d be in his life forever. So when she complained about him putting his brothers first, he thought he’d hurt her feelings. That she thought she was in some kind of competition with them.

  But Callie was independent. If she wasn’t working at the diner, she was studying or doing her art. She hadn’t needed him to check in with her all the time. She was good on her own. No, the real issue was that he showed up late to everything. His whole family did. Because their competitions came first. Before classes, proms, anniversaries—anything.

  He hadn’t seen it until this moment. Callie owned his heart, plain and simple. But she didn’t own his time. His family did. They lived by their own code, their own rules, and those came before anything or anyone outside of them. Raised without a mother, by two staunchly independent—and some would say eccentric—men, they were mountain men through and through.

  Callie’d never had a problem with his loyalty to his brothers. She’d had a problem with his dependability. If he said he’d go to the prom with her, he needed to go to the damn prom. Period.

  For the first time, he got it. “I won’t be late again.”

  He watched her anger melt into confusion. One beat, two beats, and then…”Thank you.” Though, she still sounded skeptical.

  “You’ve got me for six weeks, minus a day. Clock’s ticking, wild thing. Tell me your plans, and let me know how I can help.”