The Violet Line

by Bilinda Ni Siodacain

  They sat like this for hours. The day passed and Sam was content to simply sit holding his beloved tight and reminiscing about the time they had spent together. What little time he had with her had been the happiest he had ever known.

  Chapter Ten

  Swimming towards the surface of my consciousness my mind struggled to remember what had happened. I had been so tired after healing Sam. Sam was back! My eyes flew open and I found myself still sitting in his arms. Gazing up at him happiness flooded through me. His eyes were closed but I knew he wasn’t asleep, just thinking deeply. Shifting slightly in his grasp made him open his eyes. He looked down at me and smiled. I felt so safe here in his arms; I really wanted to be nowhere else. We stayed wrapped up in each other. I was surrounded by the safety and the smell of my Sam. Eventually Sam broke our shared silence.

  “Jade, there is something else I have to tell you.” His voice sounded odd, but I didn’t take too much notice; I just simply looked at him. Lifting me from his lap, he sat me on the middle of the bed and got up. Staring into Sam’s eyes as he looked at me, I could feel there was something very wrong. He’d been too quiet.

  Fear and panic filled my gut as I thought perhaps he had come back simply to dump me. I had a feeling that whatever he was going to say was going to be awful and I couldn’t think of anything worse than him telling me he didn’t want me anymore. I loved Sam with every fibre of my being. When I was near him, I felt alive. If he left me when he had just come back to me, it would kill me. Sam began to noiselessly pace the wooden floor of my bedroom. He avoided looking at me and I could feel my fear beginning to claw its way up my throat. I thought that at any second it might claw its way out of my mouth and land on the bed, rolling around and screaming in panic. I watched as every so often he would stop to push his hands through his hair. I couldn’t take it anymore; all his pacing and silent brooding was making it worse. Jumping from the bed and grabbing him by the forearm, I pulled him around to look at me.

  “What’s wrong, Sam? Tell me; is it something else about them? Watching you do this to yourself is killing me. Just tell me; we’ll figure it out!” I could see the anguish in his eyes as he answered me.

  “It’s over, Jade.”

  I recoiled as though he had physically slapped me. My heart broke into a million pieces of screaming sorrow; I could feel it littering the cavity of my chest as though someone had thrown confetti everywhere. I remembered the paper I had watched falling into the bin the other day and my thoughts of confetti, but they had been happy times – before all this had happened. I could feel myself crumbling; all of this happened in a matter of seconds. My entire world fell off its axis when he spoke those words.

  “W-what – do – you mean?” I stumbled as he grabbed me by the shoulders to stop me from pitching forward.

  “I don’t want to do this. You must understand this, Jade; I love you. But they’re going to destroy us.”

  I suddenly didn’t feel so terrible; I might be able to stop him from doing something stupid after all.

  “I don’t care what they want to try and do. Let them try it; I’m not afraid of them. I can’t lose you; that would destroy me. Sam, please.” My voice came out braver than I was inside but I could feel the conviction within my own heart.

  “Jade, always so brave. I’m not afraid of them either. Your love has made me want to face whatever I have to; even death itself doesn’t daunt me. But I can’t lose you and I won’t let them have you. As long as I can protect you, I will. I will do whatever it takes to keep you safe, even if it means that the best thing for you is if I’m not with you anymore.” His words were beginning to really scare me. They had a fatal ring to them, almost as though he was preparing me for the end and that in his own head, he was already gone.

  “I don’t believe this; you know I’m safer with you. We’re stronger together!” I grabbed his face with my hands, pulling his lips towards mine. I felt his breath, cold as it fanned against my fevered face. He wrapped his arms around me, holding me against him, moulding our bodies together. Our mouths crushed together. The kiss was savage and passion embodied. All the pain and anguish of his words; I allowed it all to pour into our kiss. I pulled him closer still, as though I might breathe him in, become one so we could never be separated. He wouldn’t let the kiss deepen and pulled out of my grip, letting me go so suddenly that I stumbled. He stood with his back to me; his shoulders set stiffly, his body unmoving and rigid.

  “We can’t do this, Jade; it’s too late. It was a mistake for us to become involved with each other. But that’s done and now I’m going to fix it. You won’t see me again.”

  “Wait! Don’t leave me, Sam. Please; I’m in love with you. Does that mean so little to you that you can just walk away from me, from us?”

  He turned to face me. Tears glistened on his alabaster skin like diamonds; they rolled down his cheeks, falling and hitting his shirt, leaving little dark stains like the spreading of blood from a broken heart.

  “I won’t destroy you, Jade; I love you too much. That’s why I have to do this. I won’t let them use me to kill you. I can’t; I’ll die first.” His voice cracked and broke over his words.

  “You mean you’re going to kill me if you stay because they said so?” My voice sounded incredulous as I tried to fathom what he had just told me.

  “Yes. If I stay, you will die by my hands and I can’t kill you.”

  I stared into the eyes of the man I loved; my would-be killer. I still wanted to be with him. I would always want to be with him, always by his side up to the moment when he would take me in his arms in an embrace of death. I would love him forever. He reached his hand out towards me, tracing my cheek with his thumb as though he could memorise it through touch alone. I pressed my face into the cold embrace of his hand.

  “I won’t let them have you,” he said again stroking my face, pain over flowing from his eyes. “I’ll never let them have you; I’ll die before I let them have you. You’re mine, Jade. My heart, my being; it’s all yours. All that I am, I give to you.”

  Leaning into me, his lips brushed mine tenderly. Then he crushed me against him one last time, his lips pressing into mine as though he was trying to melt the two of us into the one person. The force of the emotion almost crippled me and I knew the loss of my happy ending within his embrace. Pulling away from me, his breathing was ragged. Leaning his forehead on mine, he whispered into my mouth, “I love you from now until eternity. Remember that; and when I’m gone, don’t look for me.”

  With those final words, he ripped away from me and was gone. I felt the rush of wind and the ghost of his touch on my face, but he was gone. I cried and screamed after him, begging him to come back, but my words were just thrown back in my face mockingly by the empty echo of our bedroom. I cried until it was bright outside again and I had no more pieces of my soul that I could lose in salty tracks down my face. And still, I begged the empty air for his return but to no avail.

  Chapter Eleven

  Sam stood outside in the cool night air. Tears ran unchecked down his face and he kept seeing Jade’s face over and over again as he told her it was over. He had shocked himself that he had even managed to say the things he did. Leaning against the wall, he pressed his forehead against the cool brick. He hoped he had done the right thing. He had always promised he would never hurt Jade and now he had broken her heart; the pain she felt, he felt the same way. Slamming his head off the brick, he wondered for the hundredth time why it had to happen. They were so happy together; she was his everything. Why did the council have to interfere and destroy everything?

  He watched parts of the brick crumble away as he lifted his head from the wall. He needed to get away before he lost his courage and went back upstairs, took her into his arms, and never let her go. He could still hear her crying and calling out for him to come back; it broke his heart to hear the anguish in her pleading. Shaking himself, he realised that it would be selfish to endanger her just so he could stay with her. He couldn
’t do that to her. True love was selfless and he had no problem sacrificing himself if it meant that Jade was safe.

  He jogged along the footpath, the grey rain dampening his black hair on his forehead. He hadn’t brought his leather coat and the shirt clung to his body with the rain. He wasn’t sure how long he ran, but when he felt the first taste of dawn he decided to take cover in one of the warehouses that lined the pier. He would hide here for the day like a rat cowering and scuttling in the shadows. It had been a long time since he felt so low but if everything went to plan and Graham’s poison worked, he wouldn’t be feeling anything for very long. These thoughts comforted him as he lay behind one of the many wooden boxes that filled the old building. He lay still, not moving or breathing. He didn’t need breath to survive but a vampire had to breathe in order to speak; it was one of life’s many necessities. Time passed slowly; each minute that ticked by felt like an eternity. But still, he never moved. The rats grew curious about the warehouse’s newest addition and grew braver as the hours passed, crawling on him as he lay there. Sam never noticed; he thought only of Jade. He had sworn that his last hours on earth would be spent indulging himself in the detailed memories that a vampire has and this is what he did.

  As he lay there he remembered the night they had met, every minute detail recorded and remembered. He replayed her laugh over and over in his mind, trying to recapture it exactly as it should have been. Best of all, he remembered the love he had seen in her eyes. it had always surprised him to see it; he didn’t feel that he deserved it. Forever unworthy of such a precious gift, she had given him her heart and soul and he had cherished them; he would for all eternity. He could feel the night tainting the air and he began to stir. If he was going to do it, it would be now.

  As he stood, the rats ran in a squealing scurrying group to hide among the other boxes. He watched them with some amusement before walking towards the door. He wanted to watch the sky as he slipped into perpetual night; it had always been his comfort. The air tasted salty and felt fresh against his skin; he could feel it coating his lips. He walked towards the edge of the pier and looked out across the water. It looked so calm; like dark silk.

  “Beautiful,” he whispered under his breath as he watched small ripples disturb the surface.

  “Always seemed a bit cold to me.” A voice broke through his contemplation. Sam smiled as he gripped the vial in his hands and turned to face Oskaar.

  “Oskaar, a pleasure as always. I find it seems peaceful looking out across it, but to everyone their own, I suppose.” Sam kept his voice light as he watched Oskaar. “Here on your own? Or are the others lurking somewhere?”

  “Oh the others are here somewhere; they wouldn’t have missed this for the world, but I believe Lissie is having a small bit of fun before she joins us and the others are keeping a strict eye on her. You know what she is like; children have a tendency to get a little out of control, but I find rules work quite well with her if a nice threat is also offered.” Oskaar smiled; it seemed open and friendly and he was completely relaxed about the whole situation.

  “So, my dearest Samuel, have you failed in the persuasion of your beloved Jade?”

  “What makes you say that?”

  “Come come now, Samuel; I don’t see her standing at your side threatening me with some type of physical harm if I come near her or you for that matter. I must admit, I’m quite disappointed in you. I had hoped for so much more from you; I had hoped it wouldn’t come to this.” He watched Sam, filling his voice with disappointment as he spoke.

  “Well,” Sam answered, keeping his voice even and measured; concealing the vial he held carefully in his hand. “I had also hoped it wouldn’t come to this. Everything would have been simpler if you had never interfered. You know me, Oskaar, and in all the years you’ve known me, I would never have had the courage to do something of this magnitude. However, since I met Jade, I’ve found I had the courage to do an awful lot. You see, I love her and I would never see her harmed in any way. You had to know that when you had me brought to the council’s house; you were never a fool. You also knew that by showing me those visions, there was no way I could have brought her in. Oskaar you know how much I loathe what we are, what we have become. Jade is pure. I won’t let her be tainted by the monsters; not now not ever. She will never become one of us.”

  “Ah yes, what you say is true. She is pure and yes, I was aware of the love you both share. I also know you, Sam; better even then you know yourself. It would have been simpler for all if you had brought Jade with you tonight, but then nothing about this life is ever simple; not living, dying or love itself. Everything must be fought for. I know what you plan in the darkest corners of your heart, Sam; you always did have a flair for the dramatic. But because I know you so well, I have always known that. You would die for love, Samuel; would you not? Is that not what you have planned? Your brave and bold plan to save the one you love is to kill yourself, therefore leaving the trail cold so we would never be able to track her. Is that not what your great heroic move is, Sam?” Oskaar’s calm voice and words caught Sam completely off guard. He started to wonder if he had been out manoeuvred by the council, but felt somewhat secure in the knowledge that what he had planned would work.

  “It’s true though, isn’t it, Oskaar? If I die, your connection to Jade dies, too. You’ll never find her. You will forever have visions of the one you will never possess and your prophecy will crumble in your very hands.”

  “Yes, it will die with you, Samuel. Whenever you die, so too will the connection; it is only your love that makes her vulnerable.” Oskaar kept his voice low and bowed his head as he spoke.

  “Then I win!” Lifting the vial to his lips, Sam drank the poison that Graham had given him. It burned as he swallowed it. Sam’s eyes swam with tears and his vision became distorted. He fell to his knees on the pier, his hands digging into the gravel as blood dribbled from his mouth. It burned down inside him and as he closed his eyes on the world and wished the pain would end, his last thoughts were of Jade as she held him in her arms and kissed him.

  Chapter Twelve

  Sitting on the end of my bed, I stared at the floor. I couldn’t believe Sam was gone. I didn’t understand what had happened; I had been so happy when he had returned. The way he had cradled me in his arms, I was certain he loved me; I just couldn’t fathom why he would think we were better off apart. Didn’t he understand I was safer with him? I wasn’t experienced enough in dealing with vampires to know how best to protect myself. Sure I knew more than most humans, but Sam wasn’t a danger to me so I never really had to learn how to defend myself properly against them.

  How was I supposed to escape the council? Surely if they could find Sam, how hard would it be for them to find me? My thoughts whirled through my head, always running back to Sam and how he had said goodbye. He thought it was the only way to protect me from them, but wouldn’t they eventually catch up to him, too? I just didn’t understand any of it.

  I wasn’t sure how much time had passed, but I felt suddenly tired. I had slept for so long, cradled with Sam. I couldn’t understand why I would be tired again, but I crawled back into my bed and pulled the duvet over my head. The blankets and sheets smelled of him. Pulling them in closer around my body, breathing grew harder. I didn’t want to breathe if Sam wasn’t ever coming back; I didn’t want to do anything if Sam was never coming back to me. I couldn’t believe how unfair the whole situation was. Wasn’t I enough of a freak that I had my power? Some people called it a gift; I thought of it now as a curse. It had cost me my soul mate. Breathing in deeply, the scent of him filled my nostrils.

  My pillow grew damp under my cheeks. I didn’t think I had any more tears to cry – surely I had run dry – but the tears ran down my nose and onto the pillow. I lay there like some sort of wounded animal, sobbing silently and holding onto the blankets. It was pitiful; I knew this and didn’t care. I felt hollow inside. I understood now how the tin man felt in the Wizard of Oz; my heart was
gone, ripped clean out of me, left to trail after Sam wherever he went to. Closing my eyes and my head was filled with images. I must have fallen asleep because I never noticed the images becoming coherent pictures until I was right in the middle of the dream.

  I stood at the back of a large, dark warehouse. It felt cold and damp but more than that, a sort of misery hung in the air. I noticed Sam was there, too; he stood in the middle of the room. He looked beautiful, but then he was always beautiful. He wore the shirt and jeans he had on earlier and his black hair curled around his head as it dried from the rain he walked here in.

  Following Sam’s gaze, I spotted what appeared to be a dark shadow flitting among some of the large containers at the opposite end of the building. It wasn’t until Sam called out to him that I realised it was a man, another vampire. He came to a halt and observed Sam. I tried to hear what they were saying, but it all sounded garbled, as though I was listening to a cassette tape backwards. I crept closer, hoping to understand more of what was going on. It didn’t matter how close I got; I still couldn’t understand what they were speaking about. I was afraid Sam might see me and be angry that I had followed him, but he never noticed me.

  The other vampire turned around and examined some small vials on a shelf behind him. He was very beautiful, albeit slightly dishevelled. He had very dark hair, almost the same colour as Sam’s. His eyes were deep and large; a colour one could become lost in, like a warm melted chocolate, designed to draw you in. He had a strong angular jaw and face, vaguely gaunt. Tall and muscular, he had wide shoulders that his scruffy clothes couldn’t conceal. His fingers were long and artistic; those of a piano player, I thought idly to myself as I watched him perusing the many bottles of liquid.