Adored: Book 1 (The Beloved Series)

by MJ Masucci

  His stomach roiled with fear. Who hurt her? She was in no condition to be questioned and what’s more, she might not even remember all the details.

  “No one’s going to hurt you. I won’t let them. Let me see if I can get a phone signal again; your family will want to know your back.”

  “Nooo, don’t leave me.” Her cries were so pathetic that he wanted to punch something. She clung tightly to him as he tried to get up.

  “Alright, I won’t leave you.”

  “You left me before and they took me,” she whispered.

  “They were watching us. I had no idea.”

  Even though he knew he shouldn’t, he had to ask.

  “Who were they?”

  “I don’t know. They kept me locked up like a dog.”

  “We have to report this. Let everyone know you’re back. Your disappearance needs to be investigated.”

  “You can’t. They’ll try to take me again.”

  “They won’t, I promise.”

  Nina was agitated and had begun to sweat. Julian soothed her and stopped asking her questions so she could rest.

  Two days later, she was sitting up in bed and he was coaxing her to eat. Her fever had broken sometime in the night and was down to near normal. He avoided talking about where she was for the past four months, but he knew she wanted to tell him.

  Julian was disturbed by the fact that when he touched her, she flinched as if he had burned her. He helped her in the shower and got a better look at the scars in the bright lights of the bathroom. He counted five thin pink lines across her back.

  They were months old, which meant that whoever took her used it as a method to initially subdue her, to teach her that if she had tried to escape that she would get more of the same. It made Julian nauseous to think that Nina had been abused.

  The question that was on the tip of his tongue was something much worse: had she been raped? He wouldn’t be able to handle it if she told him that she had been. Not because she would be damaged goods but because he had failed her in one more way. He wouldn’t ask; he would wait for her to tell him.

  After her shower, he helped her to the couch. Another disturbing fact he noticed was that she didn’t have the same affection for Bear. She shrank away from him and pushed at his head when he went to lick her. The dog was confused and whined until Julian soothed him. It was confounding.

  “Do you want to eat?”

  “I’ll take some crackers.”

  “Sweet pea, you need something more nourishing than crackers.”

  “I’m used to them since it’s mostly what I ate the past few months.”

  Julian looked at her horrified, “You need to eat something else besides crackers.”

  The look Nina gave told him not to argue. He went to the small kitchen and found a package of saltines, which he handed to her. She ate four of them, folded the bag back up and tucked it next to her.

  “Nina, we have more. You can eat more.”

  “I’m fine. I need to ration this out.”

  He sat next to her and picked up the package. “No, you don’t. We-have-more.”

  She took the saltines from him and unrolled the bag, taking three before she closed it again.

  He had notified her family and the police the day before, as soon as he got a phone signal. They came the next day since the roads had been cleared by then.

  Her family had spent the entire day and her parents demanded she come home. Nina declined. The police questioned her, but she had little to offer. Detective Rigger, magnanimous prick that he was, apologized for accusing Julian for her disappearance. He was in a forgiving mood, happy to have his wife back and he accepted the apology.

  Tony and Joey sheepishly and in their own way, tried to make amends by putting their arms around him. But to them, he was not in a forgiving mood. They had injured him countless times and even worse, they had hurt Bear. To them, he was civil for Nina’s sake.

  Nina’s mother tried to get her to go to the hospital, but again, she declined. She just wanted to spend time home where she was safe. But was she? Whoever kidnapped her might come looking again even with the police now aware that she was actually taken by someone.

  That night, he called Thad and asked if he could take Bear for a few days. The dog was causing Nina to become agitated and it was for the best. Thad questioned him when he came to pick up the dog.

  “Has Bear done something?”

  “No, he’s as loving as ever. Nina doesn’t want him near her; she won’t tell me why, but I have my suspicions.”

  “Shit, I’m sorry this happened to her. Who the fuck would take her?”

  “I don’t know and the police have no clues.”

  “How long you need us to keep Bear?”

  “I wish I knew. I love him, but I need to get Nina’s head right before we have him in the house again. I hope you understand.”

  “I do. You forget I was in the military. I’ve seen it all and she exhibits symptoms of someone who has seen some bad shit.”

  “I know. If I could just get her to open up to me. I know there’s something more than she’s telling me. She didn’t say anything to the police, either. She had very little to offer them. That fuck Rigger actually apologized to me.”

  “Asshole. I never liked that guy. We fixed his car a few times and he threw his badge around trying to get a discount.”

  “Sounds about right.”

  Julian glanced up and saw Nina looking through the window at him. He knelt down to hug the dog and then handed Thad his leash.

  “Take care of my boy,” Julian called after him.

  “You know I will.”

  As Julian headed to the house, he wiped away a tear. He was going to miss that dog, but Nina came first.

  “He’s gone?” Nina said matter of factly.

  “For now.”

  “For good.”

  “Nina, are you going to tell me why you don’t want him around?”

  “I just don’t. You never should’ve gotten him.”

  “I got him for you. He was your birthday present and as I remember, you were thrilled when I gave him to you.”

  “That was a long time ago.”

  Julian didn’t want to argue with her because Nina was getting agitated. He knew she needed psychological help, but she refused. She was cold to him and didn’t want him touching her. He understood her feelings, but it hurt him just the same.

  “Maybe we should go to the cottage.”

  She actually smiled at him, “I’d like that.”

  “You would?”

  “Yes. Can we leave tomorrow?”

  “Uh, I guess so. Are you sure?”

  “I want to go. It has good memories.”

  It certainly did. It’s where they had gotten married and started out the three blissful weeks together before she was kidnapped.

  The next morning Julian packed the truck, preparing for a short weekend. When he came back in the cabin, he heard her talking on the phone. The bedroom door was closed and he crept over trying to listen, but before he heard anything, Nina hung up. He quickly walked away before she caught him eavesdropping. When she came out, he asked her if she was ready to go.

  “Yes, let’s get started. I hope we get there before dark.”

  “It’s only a five-hour drive. We should get there by three.”

  He led her onto the snow-packed path to the truck, making sure she didn’t fall. After she had been tucked into the passenger seat, he went around to the driver’s side.

  As they drove towards Maryland, Julian thought about when they were last here. It was so romantic and their marriage on the beach amid the sound of the crashing waves was all either could have dreamed. Now Nina was broken.

  He continually glanced at her as she stared out the window. She made no move to touch him and was pushed against the door on her side. It made him sad. The last time they made this drive, they couldn’t keep their hands off each other. Now she wanted no part of that. Julian hoped one
day she would again.

  Upon arrival at the cottage, she jumped out of the car and walked down the bluff even before he had unloaded the bags. He looked out the window of the cottage and saw her standing at the edge of the dock. Nina was staring out at the water as the waves lapped against the supports.

  Julian kept watching her as if he took his eyes off her, she would disappear again. It was a fear he had that bubbled to the surface. When she headed back up the bluff, he backed away. He didn’t want her seeing him watching her.

  “It’s chilly outside,” she said as she came in the back door.

  “Yes, it should warm up tomorrow. They’re calling for the sixties.”

  “I’d like to take a nap.”

  “Go ahead. I need to do a few things.”

  “You’re not leaving me?”

  “Of course not. I meant I need to turn on the gas and clean up a little. It’s dusty in here.”

  “Oh.”

  “Do you want me to join you?”

  “No, I prefer to be alone.”

  “Sure.”

  Julian turned away before Nina saw the look of hurt on his face. While she slept, he cleaned and turned the gas on so he could warm the cottage. When she awoke, he was drinking a cup of tea and reading a book. His face brightened when she came out of the bedroom.

  “Hi, sweet pea. Did you have a good nap?”

  “Sort of. I found it hard to go to sleep.”

  “I would have sat with you.”

  “Julian, stop pushing it. I don’t need your pity.”

  “It’s not pity. I love you.”

  Nina said nothing and went to the window. The dock lights were lit. She watched the waves crash on the shore, but said nothing to him. She was like a ghost. His hope was that being here would stimulate her happy feelings.

  “Do you want to eat something?”

  “Crackers?”

  Her request made Julian angry, “No, I’m putting my foot down. You need to eat something more than crackers. You’re too thin.”

  She went out the back door and he watched her head down the bluff to the beach. He jumped up to follow her, worried she might do something to herself. She realized he was following her and angrily turned to him.

  “You don’t have to babysit me. I don’t need you.”

  “I’m not babysitting you. I’m worried about you.”

  “Go away. I’m fine.”

  He walked back up the bluff but kept his eyes on her. Nina went on the dock and lay down at the end of it with her head hanging over the water. His stomach churned with worry. Julian paced in front of the windows until he saw her turn and come back up to the cottage. He breathed a sigh of relief and quickly sat down on the couch. Nina would be upset if she saw him watching her.

  “Have a good walk?”

  “Yes, I’m going to bed.”

  “But you didn’t eat.”

  “Julian, don’t,” she warned.

  He shut his mouth and watched as she went to the bedroom and shut it. It was a basically what she was doing to him, shutting him out of her life.

  Julian made himself a bowl of soup and continued to read his book until his eyelids grew heavy. He prepared himself for bed on the couch, full well knowing that she didn’t want him sharing hers with him.

  In the wee hours of the morning, he was awakened by her. Loud piercing screams filled the cottage. His eyes snapped open and he scrambled off the couch, throwing the bedroom door open. Nina was sitting up in bed and screaming, her eyes closed, sweat beading her face.

  He touched her and she lashed out at him, connecting with his shoulder. Julian grabbed her in his arms and pulled her against him. The screaming stopped and she opened her eyes which were wild with fear.

  “I’m here, baby. It’s okay.”

  “Let me go. Get your hands off me.”

  He looked at her stunned, but removed his arms from around her. She pushed away from him and moved to the other side of the bed.

  “Nina, talk to me. I can’t help you if you don’t talk to me.”

  “I don’t want to talk. Leave me.”

  “Please!”

  “Leave me alone.”

  “I just want to help you.”

  “Fuck you, Julian. I HATE YOU!” she screamed. “You left and gave them an opportunity to take me. I don’t want you anymore. I can never love you again.”

  “You don’t mean that,” he cried.

  “I do. I don’t love you. I didn’t want to come here to make things better. I wanted to come here to tell you things are over between us.”

  Julian looked at her incredulously, “I never meant for anything to happen to you. I didn’t know they were watching us.”

  “They were—for quite a awhile.”

  It was the first piece of information Nina had revealed to him.

  “How do you know?”

  “I was trapped for four months. You think they didn’t tell me anything in that time?”

  “I want to know. Why can’t you tell me?”

  “Because it doesn’t matter. There is nothing you can do to change it.”

  “I don’t want to lose you.”

  “You lost me the moment I was taken.”

  Julian swallowed hard trying to push down the lump that had formed in his throat.

  “Don’t say that.”

  “It’s true, Julian. The minute I knew you left me to rot is when I realized that I hated you. You didn’t even try to find me.”

  “No one would help me. The police thought I murdered you. They didn’t believe that you were kidnapped. They only wanted to accuse me of something I didn’t do.”

  “Did you try to find me on your own?”

  “I did. I spent the entire day looking for you until it got dark. We had a storm that day and into the next, don’t you remember? I couldn’t go out again until it stopped. I went to the police as soon as I could get down the mountain.”

  “You left me and now I’m leaving you,” Nina said quietly.

  “Can’t we work this out? I love you.”

  “I’m dead inside. I have nothing to give you nor do I want to. Frankie is coming to get me this morning. My mother already got my things from the cabin. I gave her a key after we were married.”

  “I can’t believe this. I won’t let you go.”

  “You have no choice. I can’t give you what you need.”

  “So this is it?”

  “Yes. Please leave me alone.”

  He rose from the bed without saying another word, pulled on his jeans, boots and coat and went out the back door. The dawn was just starting to break and he walked to the dock as Nina had done.

  Julian strolled to the end of it and stared out onto the water in the waning darkness. Feelings of despair overtook him and his body shook as he sobbed. He sank to the floor and cried until his head ached then he turned onto his back as the sun rose. He stared at the sky and waited.

  He wasn’t sure if Nina had left, but it didn’t matter. Nothing he said to her was going to change her mind. Her face was devoid of emotion, even hate when she told him she was leaving.

  When Julian entered the cottage, Nina was gone. It was still early, but everything she had brought with her was missing from the suitcase that was sitting in the corner. Only his clothing remained.

  He dialed Maureen’s number hoping that this time she would answer. He had been trying for the past few days to reach her. He didn’t think a text should convey this type of news. The phone rang several times before her sleepy voice came on.

  “Asshole! You’re lucky I’m getting up in a few minutes.”

  His voice trembled, “Maureen…”

  “Julian, what’s wrong?”

  “She’s gone.”

  “I don’t understand. She’s been gone.”

  “No, she came back to me.”

  He heard the bed sheets rustle as Maureen sat up.

  “When? Why didn’t you call me?”

  “I tried several times. You never
answer.”

  “Why didn’t you leave me a message?”

  “It’s not the kind of thing you leave on a phone message. Hello, my wife returned and she’s totally fucked up.”

  “Geez, Julian. Tell me what happened.”

  He told her the entire story about the night Nina came home and the aftermath.

  “She’s gone?”

  “Yes, she left this morning. What am I going to do? I love her, but she hates me.”

  “She’s confused. She needs help.”

  “Even if she gets help, she isn’t going to forget.”

  “What happened is not your fault.”

  “I failed her. I was supposed to protect her and I didn’t. I don’t even know who took her. The police are investigating, but I have no doubt the trail is cold. Nina told them as much as she told me, probably told them even less.”

  “You can’t blame yourself.”

  “Maureen, she said they were watching us for a long time. Who would be watching us and why?”

  He heard her exhale, “It’s not safe for you. I think you should stay with me.”

  “You want me to come to California?”

  “I just got a new place. No one is going to bother you here except some paparazzi. Now that I’m dating Danté and in another big movie, they’ve come sniffing around.”

  “What if Nina comes back?”

  “Julian, she needs time. Leave her alone. If she’s coming back, then she will. Don’t push her because you’ll only end up pushing her away. You don’t know the extent of what happened to her but it sounds horrific.”

  “That’s what worries me. She’s still my wife.”

  “Are you coming?”

  “I guess. I need someone on my side.”

  “I always will be. Make your arrangements and let me know.”

  Chapter 19

  Three days later, Julian sat at the small pool in Maureen’s backyard. She had rented a three-bedroom house in Hollywood Hills near Danté’s place. He would be spending most of his days alone, but at night there was plenty to do thanks to Maureen’s contacts in the film industry.

  Tonight they were going to a party hosted by Kent Toray of Toray Fashions. It wasn’t Julian’s taste, but anything to escape what was happening in his head. There would be free liquor and food.