Blood at the Premiere: A Day One Undead Adventure

by RR Haywood

  ‘Exit?’ Henrietta asks.

  ‘Exit what?’ Bennie asks.

  ‘She means is there an exit door, you fucking idiot,’ Dolan snaps.

  ‘Oh right, er, yeah…straight ahead down the corridor.’

  ‘You’re sure, Bennie?’ Henrietta asks, not trusting his drugged mind.

  ‘Like totally,’ Bennie says. ‘I saw it. It said exit. It was a door that had exit written on it. Door…exit.’ He makes a square shape with his hands and nods.

  ‘We’ll go for that,’ Henrietta says, looking from Bennie to Dolan.

  ‘We should wait here,’ Dolan says, taking a step away from the door.

  Henrietta pauses to think and again feels that urge to not be here but not wanting to go against Dolan or risk making him look foolish.

  ‘If the police get here they might shoot into the foyer,’ she says quickly. ‘Or we could get held hostage and used…’

  ‘Christ, yes,’ Dolan says with a fresh look of horror and imagining himself as the main hostage and his colleagues on the news desk running bulletins on his chances of survival. The thought of being chopped up on live television makes his stomach cramp and a fresh film of sweat bead on his forehead. ‘Right, we should go.’

  ‘Good idea,’ Henrietta says. ‘Bennie, put the vodka bottles down.’

  ‘We’ll need refreshments,’ Bennie says seriously. ‘And, like, it’s hot so…’

  ‘Vodka is a diuretic,’ she says, cutting him off as Dolan casts an interested look at her.

  ‘Ah my nan is a diuretic,’ Bennie says. ‘I might get it, too…she takes insolence.’

  ‘Insulin, and we’re not taking the vodka. Drink some water,’ Henrietta says.

  ‘Water? Where from?’ Bennie asks, looking at the shelves. ‘Can’t see any.’

  ‘From the tap,’ she says, leaning over to twist the cold tap on and swilling out a glass. She fills it up and holds it out to Bennie who stares at it with distaste.

  ‘Tap water? My neurologist said we shouldn’t have tap water.’

  ‘Neurologist?’ Henrietta asks, feeling a fug descend in her mind.

  ‘Yeah, he tells us what to eat.’

  ‘Nutritionist,’ she says with a sigh. ‘Drink the water.’

  ‘But…’

  ‘It’s from a spring. It’s Evian.’

  ‘Is it?’ Bennie asks, taking the glass. ‘Awesome.’

  ‘Dolan…’

  ‘I’m fine. We should go,’ Dolan says, now eager to avoid being chopped up on television.

  ‘It’s hot. Drink some water. You’ll run faster if you do.’

  ‘Will I?’ he asks, staring at the glass being held out. ‘Okay. Got it. Water. We should go.’

  ‘We will.’ She fills a third glass and gulps it down in one hit. ‘Ready?’

  ‘Ready,’ Dolan says, keying himself up by bouncing on his feet and staring at the door.

  ‘Okay, Henrietta,’ Bennie says happily. ‘Er…where are we going again?’

  ‘The exit,’ Henrietta says.

  ‘Okay. What exit?’

  ‘By the toilets.’

  ‘Okay.’

  ‘I’ll open the door, we’ll stay low behind the bar then when we get to the end we just run for it and get through the exit. Got it?’

  ‘Yep,’ Dolan says, puffing air out through his cheeks while still bouncing up and down.

  ‘Okay,’ Henrietta whispers, pushing the handle down and easing the door open a fraction. She stares out and winces at the number of people now sitting up and opening their eyes. More are shuffling towards the door and the room is filled with low, dull groans. She drops down and squeezes through the door then starts working down the bar with Dolan and Bennie right behind her.

  At the end she stops and inches to extend her neck and peer through the gap, holding her breath. The noises of those in the foyer are evident and clear. Harsh, ragged breathing. Hissing growls and the drips of blood falling from wounds. The smell is incredible. A real metallic shit-filled stench of piss and blood. Hot, too, as though the vast expenditure of energy has heated the room.

  Slowly, ever so slowly she works to gain a view. The right side looks clear but the left is the direction they need to take. Run to the left, across the outside edge of the foyer and over to the doors to the corridor.

  Come on. You can do this. Keep these two alive and reap the benefits. Easy now, easy. SHIT!

  Dolan bursts past her with his leg knocking her arms out sending her sprawling onto the floor. Running in fear, the bearded man sprints noisily across the foyer with Henrietta rising to her feet and grabbing Bennie up on his.

  ‘Go,’ she whispers, tugging him along as he tries to reach for a bottle of whiskey that falls with a loud thunk to roll across the floor.

  Heads snap round. Red eyes stare wide as they pinpoint the source of the noise and catch sight of Dolan running towards the door. She yanks Bennie out from behind the bar and runs, dragging him behind her. The room reacts with a palpable sensation of projected hunger that makes her heart hammer in her chest. Clutching Bennie, she runs with her head down and eyes fixed on the back of Dolan reaching the door. He doesn’t wait for them but powers through desperate to save himself.

  They start coming. A bursting of motion as though energised to feast. Stiff-legged and ungainly, and that fact alone is what keeps Henrietta running ahead towards the door instead of going back to the bar.

  A heavyset man goes down in a pool of blood, sending a wave of crimson splashing out that coats her legs in thick drips. Another one trips over the first and is sent sluicing along only to be vaulted by Henrietta who turns and yanks Bennie over the snapping corpse. She gets behind the young singer pushing him hard to keep him moving. The stiletto on her left heel snaps, making her lurch to the side, but on she goes hobbling ever forward. They gain the door seconds before the horde converge. Bennie slams through and she follows, pausing for the briefest of seconds to yank her shoes off and throw them aside.

  ‘Go,’ she shouts now without fear of being heard and pushes Bennie down the corridor towards Dolan whimpering at the exit door and trying in vain to push it open. His yelps get louder as the door behind her bursts open from the blood-soaked masses surging after them.

  ‘THE BAR…PUSH THE BLOODY BAR,’ Henrietta shouts. The words get through his panicked mind into his panicked brain, which convert the signals to his panicked hands, which strike at the bar that slots in and he stumbles into the night world outside.

  Henrietta runs on, pushing Bennie ahead of her while the horde stream down the corridor behind. The door swings shut as Dolan runs off whimpering in fright. She gets Bennie through and charges out before stopping dead and throwing her weight back against the door to force it closed.

  ‘Henrietta!’ A man looms from the shadows as the things in the corridor impact the door, jarring her forward a few inches. Gritting her teeth, she digs her feet into the concrete and drives back, forcing her strong thigh muscles to lock out and keep the door closed.

  ‘Oh wow…’ The man comes into the light enough for her to see the dark receding hair and broad shoulders. ‘It’s really you.’

  Shit. Not now.

  ‘Did they hurt you?’ the man asks in a tone dripping with genuine concern as Henrietta looks over to see Bennie trying to unscrew the lid on a bottle of whiskey he managed to grab.

  ‘They wouldn’t let me in,’ the man says, edging closer. Henrietta looks over to see Dolan now standing in the middle of the road in front of the alley with his hands pushing through his hair while he turns in a slow circle. She looks back at the man she had seen earlier behind the barrier and then again at the main entrance as the bouncers pushed him back.

  ‘I was trying to warn you,’ the man says, nodding earnestly. ‘Love your work,’ he adds, gushing. ‘You’re so amazing.’

  ‘Warn me?’ Henrietta asks, trying to think of how to let go of the door and grab Bennie before the things come flying out. Bennie is drunk but pliable and so far he’s done
as told. Grab him and run for it while shouting at Dolan to start running. Henrietta knows she can run but Bennie and Dolan are both unconditioned and won’t last more than a minute of flat-out sprinting.

  ‘Yeah, about this,’ the man says, bringing her attention back on him. ‘I was trying to save you, Henrietta Swallow.’

  ‘Okay,’ she says calmly, detecting the rise in his voice.

  ‘I just tried to warn you but they pushed me and then he got me in the alley and…’

  ‘It’s okay,’ Henrietta says, sizing him up and wondering if he could hold the door closed while she legs it with Bennie.

  ‘…and he kept pushing me and I told him to stop and…and I said he had to warn you but he laughed and then hit me and…I didn’t mean it but he hit me and…’

  ‘Hey, man,’ Bennie says at the man slumped against the wall of the alley further down in the shadows. ‘Want some whiskey?’

  ‘Someone with you?’ Henrietta asks the man quickly.

  ‘He hit me first and they said I wasn’t allowed to fight unless someone was attacking me and I asked him, Henrietta Swallow. I asked him if he was attacking me and he said I was a stalking cunt and he was gonna beat the shit out of me but I said I didn’t stalk no one but I was trying to warn you but he hit me again.’

  ‘Whoa,’ Bennie laughs, staring down at the unresponsive man. ‘He’s, like, totally out of it.’

  The door jolts into her back with a loud groaning that increases in pitch as the things grow in number. Already her legs are starting to shake from holding them locked.

  ‘The doctors said. They did. Honestly they did. They said don’t fight anyone ever unless they are attacking you and you are really fearful of your immediate safety, that’s what they said. They even wrote it down so I’d remember and I asked him, I asked him and he said he was gonna beat the shit out of me and that’s attacking isn’t it, Henrietta Swallow? Beating someone is attacking them isn’t it, Henrietta Swallow?’

  ‘It is,’ Henrietta says quickly as she starts to connect the dots.

  ‘Do you understand?’ the man asks, wringing his hands together while his face crumples in distress.

  ‘I do, I really do,’ Henrietta says, pushing back harder into the door.

  ‘Oh you do.’ The man sighs in relief. ‘I knew you’d understand. I knew you would. Was it okay for me to fight him? Was it? The doctors said I could only fight if I was attacked and he was…’

  ‘It was fine,’ Henrietta blurts. ‘Totally fine.’

  ‘He’s so wasted,’ Bennie says, still laughing. ‘Wake up, mate…there’s, like, zombies everywhere.’

  ‘Not zombies!’ Dolan shouts from the mouth of the alley, still standing with his hands on his head.

  ‘Thing is,’ the man says, whispering and stepping closer, ‘I think I killed him…is that bad?’

  ‘S’fine,’ Henrietta says quickly.

  ‘But he was attacking me and…I didn’t mean to kill him but…’

  ‘It’s fine.’ Henrietta nods with increasing frantic movements as the pressure against her back grows by the second.

  ‘Hey,’ Bennie calls out in surprise, ‘I think he’s dead…wow…his head is all wobbly.’

  Fuck.

  ‘He was big,’ the man says, staring at Henrietta like a child desperate to explain why he did the bad thing, ‘and…and I thought his neck would be strong but it snapped and…he fell down…’

  Oh my god. He broke his neck. Shit. Shit.

  ‘It’s really fine,’ Henrietta says, drawing a breath. ‘What’s your name?’

  ‘It’s Simon, Henrietta Swallow,’ he replies, taking another step closer and speaking as though she should remember him.

  Alarm bells ringing. Simon the stalker. The one who sent all the letters and found out where she lived so her family got the restraining order against him.

  ‘Hi, Simon.’ She grins wide and friendly. ‘I didn’t recognise you.’

  He grins wide and toothy with pride inflating his chest. Simon the stalker who sent flowers and cards on her birthday. The one the police said had been sectioned last year.

  ‘Hello,’ Bennie says, strolling over with the whiskey bottle held in one hand, ‘I’m Bennie.’

  ‘Alright.’ Simon nods but doesn’t take his eyes off Henrietta while the tip of his tongue pokes out to wet his lips. Nervous energy pours from him. The unblinking stare, but confusion in his eyes as though he doesn’t know what to do next.

  ‘Simon,’ Henrietta says gently, hiding the effort of holding the door closed, ‘can you do me a favour?’

  ‘Anything.’ Simon takes another step forward, close enough to reach out and touch the woman he has dreamt about for years, and for a second his hand twitches and rises but gets pulled back with a visible effort.

  ‘I need to talk to that man up there,’ Henrietta says, nodding at Dolan. ‘But if I open this door they’ll come running out.’

  ‘Want me to get him?’ Simon asks eagerly.

  ‘Er…I was hoping you would hold this door closed for a minute,’ Henrietta says carefully. ‘You know, just so I can get Dolan down here.’

  ‘Okay,’ Simon says with his hand stretching out. ‘Can I touch you?’

  ‘Erm…’ She fights to not show a reaction. ‘Will you hold this door closed if I say yes?’

  ‘Yeah, deffo,’ Simon says with his voice quavering.

  ‘She won’t shag you, mate,’ Bennie says helpfully. ‘She’s celery or…’

  ‘Celibate,’ Simon growls the word out, hissing at Bennie with an instant show of venom on his face. ‘Henrietta is celibate and pure and trying to find herself as a woman.’

  ‘I am,’ Henrietta says, glaring at Bennie in an effort to stop him saying anything else. ‘Tell you what, Simon. You hold this door closed and I’ll give you a kiss.’

  ‘Seriously?’ Simon asks.

  ‘Can I hold the door closed, too?’ Bennie asks with sudden hope at the rewards on offer.

  ‘No,’ Simon switches to the growl. ‘Henrietta Swallow wants me to do it.’

  ‘I do. Just Simon. He’s strong and, er…’

  ‘I am strong,’ Simon says, puffing himself up. ‘Stronger than him,’ he says, switching with a baleful look at Bennie.

  ‘You come here, Simon. Get in close next to me.’ She hides the wince as he pushes his shoulder in close to hers and stares unblinking. ‘Push with your feet and lock your legs out.’

  ‘You have nice legs, Henrietta.’

  ‘Thanks, but you have to push hard.’

  ‘I am hard.’

  ‘Okay…I mean push hard.’

  ‘I’ve been hard since I killed that man.’

  ‘Oh.’

  ‘Is that bad?’

  ‘Nooo, it’s fine.’

  ‘I love you, Henrietta.’

  ‘Okay then…’

  ‘I love you, Henrietta.’

  ‘Great, now push har…just really push.’

  ‘I said I love you, Henrietta.’

  ‘I, erm, yep…’

  ‘Will you kiss me now?’

  ‘Yep, I said I would kiss you so…’

  ‘With tongues.’

  ‘Er…’

  ‘I love you, Henrietta. Can we kiss with tongues?’

  ‘I, er…well…the thing is, Simon, that being celibate means I don’t, er…kiss with tongues.’

  ‘But you kissed that man in the magazine with tongues on January the seventeenth when he took you on a date and you had vegetarian risotto and drank mineral water and the waiter was called Phillip and you wore a black skirt with…’

  ‘New vow!’ Henrietta blurts. ‘I have a new vow to not, er…not kiss anyone with tongues.’

  ‘When was the new vow because I never heard of the new vow on the Internet and I search for you every day and the Internet said you kissed but you didn’t let anyone put their penis inside your vagina?’

  ‘Yesterday.’

  ‘Oh wow. So I’m the first person to know about it.’

&n
bsp; ‘Totally the first person.’

  ‘I can keep a secret, Henrietta.’

  ‘Great.’

  ‘So if you kiss me with tongues I won’t tell the Internet you broke your new vow and even if we have sex and I put my penis in your vagina I won’t tell the Internet, but when we get married I can tell the Internet we had sex intercourse with your vagina.’

  ‘Okay, Simon.’

  ‘Will they take the restraining order away when we get married, Henrietta?’

  ‘They will.’

  ‘Cos it says I am not allowed to try and have physical contact with you…OH NO!’

  ‘What?’

  ‘How can you kiss me without tongues if the restraining order says I can’t have physical contact with you?’

  ‘Oh damn…I know, my friend up there is a lawyer. I can ask him to lift the restraining order so we can kiss. Shall I do that?’

  ‘Yeah…shall I go and ask him, Henrietta?’

  ‘No! You hold the door closed and I will go and ask him.’

  ‘Okay, Henrietta.’

  ‘So you have to push and keep the door closed.’

  ‘I will, Henrietta.’

  ‘Er, Bennie? Will you come with me to, er…to witness the restraining order being taken away.’

  ‘What restraining order?’ Bennie asks after guzzling a long drag from the bottle of whiskey.

  ‘Just come with me, okay?’ Henrietta says so forcefully that it makes Simon snap his head up with a look of suspicion. ‘Because I really want to kiss Simon and I can’t so I need you to witness the, er…the affidavit of the lifting of the clause to prevent any kissing.’

  ‘Eh…’ Bennie says, trying to focus.

  ‘Simon, hold the door. I’ll be right back.’ Henrietta winces and launches off from the door to grab Bennie by the wrist and start dragging him down the alley. ‘Hold it closed, Simon.’

  ‘I will, Henrietta Swallow. Hurry. We can kiss with tongues and I won’t tell the Internet and if your friend tells the Internet I can kill him for you.’

  ‘Okay!’

  ‘I don’t mind killing for you, Henrietta. I’d kill the whole wide world for you, Henrietta.’