Love's Ache_Gently Broken Series

by Ava Alise

  SEAN: Now you are ACTUALLY free to date. What now?

  Oh, he’s trying to be funny. I got you, asshole.

  ME: I’ve been free to date, and actually I have been.

  SEAN: Yeah, okay. Congrats.

  I begin typing a BUNCH of 4 letter words in the next reply to him, but my phone rings, cutting me off.

  “Hey Tank,” I say, trying hard to mask my annoyance.

  “You ready, Zee? Where you at?” I hear Tank and a buzz of student chatter in the background.

  “I’m at the fitness center. I’ll meet you at the Café in fifteen minutes. Let me just get a quick shower and walk over there.”

  “Okay, cool, see you in a bit.”

  I hang up, and my phone redisplays my reply to Sean.

  This asshole has his nerve. No, you know what, forget it. I’m not about to fight with him.

  Ros, Tank, and I spend the next two days together at the apartment, eating Chinese takeout and cramming for exams.

  They would be so pissed if they knew Sean was trying to get under my skin. Tank would probably threaten him; Ros would probably make me delete his number from my phone and take him off all my social media accounts.

  Why in the hell is he being such as ass? No…the real question is why do I still want him so badly? Because I do… and I feel like a total jackass for it.

  By Wednesday afternoon, I’m leaving my last class feeling like a boss. I know I’d aced those exams… well, maybe not the last one. Shit! Either way, two down, two to go. I feel invigorated, and I don’t want to think about the mind fuck that is Sean Thomas… so I sit at an empty table and text Chris.

  ME: Hey, cutie, what are you doing?

  CHRIS: Just coming from a meeting, Dad’s lawyer… long story. Took forever, though. What about you?

  ME: On campus, just finished two of my exams, and I kicked exam ass. Lol. So are you in town or out in the burbs? I know you said you lived a ways out.

  CHRIS: I’m in town.

  ME: Well… I have about forty-five minutes to kill before I go for my workout. Want to meet me? They have great smoothies here.

  CHRIS: Sounds good. I’ll be there in fifteen.

  ME: K. Call me when you get here, and I’ll meet you in the visitor’s parking lot.

  CHRIS: Got it. See you soon.

  I’m still beaming from my good day when I look up from my phone and see Ros and Tank approaching my table.

  “Hey, besties,” I say to them, almost singing it.

  “Hey, boo,” Ros says.

  “What up, Zee. Why are you so smiley?” Tank asks.

  “I just invited Chris here for a smoothie date.” I continue to beam.

  “Oh really?” Ros smiles at me.

  “Wait, Chris is the Teeth guy you met at The Lounge, right?” Tank clarifies.

  “Yes.”

  “When is he coming? Now?” Ros says, her smile growing larger.

  “Yup, he’ll be here in fifteen minutes.” She wiggles her brows, and I chuckle. “How’d exams go?”

  “Mine went good, I think,” Ros says.

  “Uh, we’ll see,” says Tank.

  “Uh oh, did someone have too much fucking fun and not enough fucking studying over the last week?” Ros teases.

  Tank laughs, “Nah, I studied. I probably did okay.”

  A tingle runs down my spine, and my breathing catches in my chest. The air feels… different. I look up and see Chris approaching.

  “Hey! I wasn’t expecting you for a few more minutes. This is Tank, and you remember Ros,” I nervously make introductions.

  Chris and Tank do that manly fist bump and mumble their introductions, silently sizing each other up. Ros smiles at him and returns his greeting. We say our goodbyes to Tank and Ros, then I escort Chris over to the café.

  “So long meeting, huh? How long were you there?” I ask, sitting then taking a long sip of my smoothie.

  “Two hours,” Chris says, running his hand down his face. “Guy had some type of emergency, but instead of rescheduling, he made me wait in the lobby for over an hour.”

  “Poor baby.” I pout at him then smirk. This makes him laugh.

  “Haha, you’re so fucking cute.”

  “I’ve been told.” I give him a devilish grin.

  He chuckles.

  Though we’re both sitting at the small pub table across from each other, it feels like we’re closer. It takes me a minute to realize it’s because we are both slightly leaning forward across the table. He’s like a magnet, pulling me toward him.

  And damn… what I would give to feel his magnet. Wait… what does that even mean?

  I lean back in my seat a bit, trying to break the pull; I grab my smoothie and take another sip.

  “So what are you doing this weekend?” Chris asks.

  “Usually the girls and I go to The Lounge, especially on big occasions like the end of exam week. I know it isn’t the fanciest of places, but we love it there.”

  “Yeah, I really like that place too; it’s dope.”

  “I mean, I’m pretty sure that’s what we’ll be doing, you want to come? I bet I could make you come.” I smile, trying my flirting hat on, noticing it feels a bit awkward.

  A grin spreads across Chris’ face, and he turns his head to try to hide his laugh. I’m confused.

  “What?” I say, eyebrows creased.

  “Nothing, just my dirty boy mind,” he laughs, “Sorry. yeah, I want to come, just text me and let me know what time.”

  I’m still confused, looking at him like he’s crazy… Then it hits me.

  “Oh! HA HA. So you’re a closet perv, huh?” I say, laughing.

  “Hey, it was just a bad choice of words on your end.”

  This makes us both laugh.

  Chris and I spend the next thirty minutes talking about nothing and everything. We talk about his crazy ex-girlfriend, horrible movies, and how he can tell the guy sitting across from us has a thing for the girl behind the counter. I do a lot of smiling and laughing, and I even open up a little about Sean.

  Before I know it, Ros and Tank stop by our table to say goodbye before they head to class. Tank gives him the universal man nod, and Ros says bye, but then steps behind him widening her eyes, communicating so many things in our girl world.

  “So, I guess that’s my cue; it’s your workout time right?” he says, flashing that perfect smile.

  “Yes, it is, but I’ll make sure to let you know what time to meet us Friday night.”

  “Alright.”

  We both stand, and he gives me a hug.

  And he still smells so good! Don’t start feeling him up in the café, Liz, control yourself.

  He slowly pulls back from our embrace; we both smile as we say our goodbyes, and I watch him walk toward the exit.

  Sighing, I look down and grab my bags then look up again, still grinning.

  Chris…Chris…Chris. Where did you come from?

  I glance over at the doorway Chris just walked out of and straight into the eyes of Sean … who’s staring right at me, then walks away.

  CHRIS

  That felt good… too good. I like this girl. She’s funny and sweet. Still not giving her my balls, but I can’t deny hanging out with her is something I’d like to do more of. Knowing she just got divorced, and what she shared about just getting out of another relationship, I doubt she’s thinking about dating anyway. Fucking perfect. No need for awkward conversations about where this is going or what we’re doing. I have a feeling that when I explain to her my take on relationships, she might be okay with it.

  I can’t believe I told Liz about Shayla and her bullshit; that meeting with Larry really threw me off. I got up early, dropped MJ off at school, and made it to his office forty-five minutes before our scheduled meeting. I’d been so nervous that I barely slept last night, and I was really anxious to talk to him. This asshole was so frazzled when I told him who Shayla’s father was, he asked me to sit in the lobby then left me there for a fucking hour. Ev
en after he called me back into his office with his bullshit apology claiming he had an emergency, he wasn’t much help. The only advice I got from Larry was to begin collecting receipts and documents proving my role as caregiver for MJ. Yeah, well, I’ll be collecting information on getting a new lawyer as well. If this is how he handles my dad’s legal matters, then Dad needs to get a new lawyer too.

  “Daddy!” MJ yells.

  “Hey, Frog,” I say.

  MJ runs from his place in line and jumps into my arms.

  “Ribbit,” he croaks, and I laugh.

  “Hi, Mr. Preston,” Pauline, MJ’s teacher, greets me, smiling. “MJ had a great day.”

  “Good,” I say, “were y’all going to the play yard?”

  “No, we’re just headed for a bathroom break. His daily report is in his cubby, along with today’s art project. See you tomorrow, MJ,” she says and gives him a wink.

  “Bye,” MJ says, and waves as his teacher and classmates walk pass in the hallway.

  “Are we going home now, Daddy?” MJ asks as he slides into his coat and hat.

  “Yep, unless you want to stop by the bug store for dinner?”

  “The bug store?”

  “I saw today that they have a sale on flies and crickets.”

  MJ wrinkles his little brow. “FLIES FOR DINNER?!” he exclaims.

  “Well. You are a frog, so it’s only right I feed you the right things. How does hot cricket soup and fried fly on toast sound?” I say, licking my lips and rubbing my belly.

  “Ewww. No, that’s gross,” he mock gags and doubles over.

  “Haha,” I laugh, throw him over my shoulder, and head to the car.

  I don’t know how I survived eighteen years without knowing this kid, I love his antics.

  After we get home, we fall into our usual routine. MJ goes to play in his playroom while I start dinner. Our duplex has a shotgun style layout, with a large open floor plan. The hardwood floors from the living room flow past the eat-in-kitchen. Behind the kitchen is a family room, but now it’s MJ’s designated toy room. Upstairs is a loft and three additional bedrooms. When Shayla lived here with us, we kept all of MJ’s toys in his bedroom, but the older he got, the bigger the toys seem to get. Plus, after a while, it didn’t matter how well his toys were put away, they would somehow find their way off the shelf and into his hands after dark. That’s when I made the decision to remove most of his toys from his bedroom.

  We sit down for dinner, me in my jeans and t-shirt, and MJ in a Thor costume, complete with cape and helmet. Typical MJ, I’ve shared meals with three members of the Avengers and two Power Rangers already this week.

  “So, what? Should I call you Super Frog now?” I smile, nudging MJ.

  “Nope,” he says, shoving in a mouthful of noodles.

  Swallowing, he leans close and whispers, “Even frogs have secret lives, Daddy.”

  I laugh. He truly is the best part of me. After dinner, we clean up, read a few books, and watch a few cartoons, then it’s bath and bed.

  MJ is sound asleep by the time I start packing our bags for the weekend. I’ve been worked up all week about Shayla and her shit that I’m really looking forward to seeing the guys. Nard said he’d call me if we weren’t working again, but I haven’t heard anything. I reach down and grab a few pairs of pajamas and socks from MJ’s drawer, being careful not to make any noises that would wake him. I love my job, I always have; I’m good at it, and I make a lot of money—easy money. My job will probably come up if Shayla and I end up in court, and that could be a problem. I bend over and grab a pair of shoes, throw them in the bag, and then open another drawer and begin piecing together outfits. My mind begins to race thinking about everything Shayla and her father can hold against me. I never really had to worry about it before, but the fact that I have no idea what she’s planning has me shook.

  Shortly after we’re both packed for tomorrow and the house is cleaned, I retire to my bedroom. I probably just need some sleep. I know for a fact that she would never do anything that would make her hold any real responsibility for MJ; she’s all about partying and shopping. The worst that can happen is if she tries to sue me or something. I need to get a fucking grip. Reaching into the shower, I turn the nozzle to piping hot then step inside. The body jets feel amazing on the knots in my shoulders, and the rain head soothes me, but even after twenty minutes of heated bliss, I can’t kick the worry. Maybe I need to beat Shayla to the punch before she can call me out on my flaws.

  My phone rings the second I step out of the shower, and I answer it without seeing who’s calling.

  “Hello,” I say.

  “Aye, man,” Nard says.

  “Hey.”

  “How’s lil’ man?” he says.

  “Asleep, I just packed him to go with his mom for the weekend. Are we working?”

  “Uh, kind of. Our place still is a no go, but Ty was asking if we wanted to do a private bachelorette party with him tomorrow, make some quick cash,” he says.

  A pang of annoyance pulls at my nerves. I was really hoping to get lost in the chaos of work for the next few days; it’s just what I fucking need right now.

  “Shit, I guess some work is better than nothing,” I say and push through the bathroom door into my bedroom.

  “Yeah, okay, I’ll tell him your game.”

  “Oh shit,” he continues. “You know Ashlee, the girl I met the night we went to The Lounge?”

  “Yeah,” I say, as I grab a pair of boxers and a tank from my closet.

  Red’s face comes to mind, and it makes me smile.

  “She slept over last night, and we were up pretty late, so we slept in. I guess Rita decided on this grand fucking gesture this morning, so she bursts into the room crying and pouring her heart out. Ashlee and I were butt naked.”

  My jaw hits the floor, and then the all-consuming laughter begins.

  “No. You’re kidding!” I say, barely getting it out.

  “Rita told Ashlee she needed to leave, and fuck, man… it was horrible.”

  I listen to his tale of two women, which turns into an all-out catfight, with him ending up carrying both women out and putting them in Ubers.

  Only Nard.

  I can’t say this happens to him a lot, but Nard loves his women in a frequent variety. This means when a girl does a pop in, shit will immediately get awkward because he’s rarely alone.

  “I don’t know what to do about Rita. Chris, I swear she’s driving me fucking crazy. One minute she breaks up with me, the next minute she’s dragging the girl I’m fucking around the room by her hair. Chick is unstable,” Nard sighs.

  “Well, you like the little feisty ones,” I chuckle.

  “Yeah. That’s true,” he laughs. “She stood there carrying on about doing the right thing by me and how important I was to her.”

  He continues for a while longer, and I try hard to empathize with him, but in my head, I’m screaming I told you so. A few minutes later, I’m off the phone and on my bed. I look over at the two well-packed overnight bags at the door then again at the ceiling. Doing the right thing isn’t always the easiest task; usually, it’s the most uncomfortable option in most situations. Like with Rita, she had to know Nard had a girl in his room. She and Haley are attached at the hip. She’s there more than I am, but still, she carried her crazy ass in his room.

  Could I do that? Am I the type of guy who would walk into a room with his dick tucked between his legs for the greater good? Fuck, am I even doing the right thing by MJ?

  I’d like to think so, that kid is my life.

  I look back over at the overnight bags.

  Fuck. I grab my phone and hit the call button.

  “Aye Nard, it’s me again,” I say.

  “After tomorrow, I quit.”

  LIZ

  I don’t move.

  I can’t.

  Did he see me with Chris?

  Fuck… of course he did.

  Panic freezes me in place and, by the time I push my
stupid feet to go after him, my throat is completely dry. Crowds of students scurry toward classes as I head in the direction I think he went. When I don’t find him, I look outside; the sun is warm, but my body turns cold as I stand in the busy courtyard. I don’t see Sean anywhere. I grab my phone and dial his number.

  “Sean?” I say.

  “Yeah,” he says, coldly. Hearing his voice for the first time in weeks causes my heart to somersault.

  “What are you doing here? Where did you go?” I ask.

  “I was coming to apologize, but I didn’t expect to run into you making out with some guy in the cafeteria!”

  “Making out? It was just a hug and the last time I checked, you shouldn’t care anymore.”

  He sighs heavily, and my annoyance grows.

  “Turn around,” he says.

  Sean is standing behind me holding his phone to his ear, and I take him in for the first time in over six weeks. I have dreamt of this moment so many times. Once, he came to my house, and without a word, I slapped him hard across the face. Another time, he ran to me, fell to his knees and begged for forgiveness. My favorite though, was reenacting the kissing scene from “The Notebook”. In that one, we ran to each other and shared a passionate kiss, well, that was after I slapped him. Instead, I get to stare into his stupid gorgeous face while his stupid gorgeous hand moves his stupid phone, from his stupid gorgeous head. No kissing, no begging, no slapping… Though, that last one is pretty tempting right about now.

  “Can we talk?” he says, defeated.

  Asshole.

  I shouldn’t give him the time of day. I should walk away and tell him to go to hell. Sean holds me in his storm-gray eyes that are so familiar yet so distant. My eyes sweep down his face. Usually, he’s clean shaven, but not today; he has a few days of beard growth, at least. His brown hair is unkempt and his fair skin seems pasty. Through my anger, my heart aches for him.

  “Yes,” I say, and snatch my bags from the ground.

  The tension is thick as we make our way to his car. Our silence contradicts everything around us—happy birds chase each other in the skies, two girls smile as they take a selfie, and I glare at Sean as he hits the button unlocking the car doors.

  “I’m sorry,” he says after we’re both seated.