Ironic Sacrifice

by Brooklyn Ann

  Microphones were thrust into her face. One hit her square in the nose. The reporter holding it was practically salivating.

  “Who are you? What is your relationship with the McNaughts? What do you know about the disappearance of Rage of Angels? Where is Akasha McNaught?”

  “I…I,” Jayden swallowed, suddenly feeling very faint and queasy.

  Akasha came down the stairs then, her eyes glittering amethyst flames of rage. “What the fuck are you people doing in my house?” she demanded.

  They advanced upon her with their cameras and microphones. “How do you feel about the disappearance of your close friends, Mrs. McNaught? Do you know anything that could lead to them being found?”

  “I don’t know shit,” she growled. “Now get the fuck out before I call the cops!”

  Jayden danced back and forth behind her, knowing she would be helpless if Akasha decided to unleash her fury. It was very possible that people could be hospitalized…and Akasha could end up in jail.

  To the contractor’s credit, he ignored the chaos and headed straight for the dining room, taking notes and doing his job as if everything was normal. Unfortunately, one industrious cameraman snapped pictures at the hole-ridden wall.

  Akasha pulled her phone from her pocket. “I’m calling the cops.”

  Reluctantly, the intruders departed, still calling questions over their shoulders on the way out. Akasha made a beeline for her beer like she was dying of thirst.

  The next day her grieved and angry face was plastered all over the media, along with the trashed dining room.

  “Friend of Missing Metal Band Smashes Wall in Grieved Rage,” the headlines read.

  “Those sick bastards,” Jayden whispered. Her heart swelled in pity for her friend.

  “Yeah,” Akasha said sullenly and tossed the paper in the fireplace.

  The press continued to harangue them for the next week, which made things difficult, for vampire envoys began to visit Silas to go over the details of Max’s murder.

  Eventually, the reporters left. Whether it was because Silas threatened to press charges, or because they finally believed Akasha didn’t know anything interesting, Jayden didn’t know or care. She was just happy to be able to go to the grocery store unmolested. They’d been out of cheese for three days.

  Akasha didn’t seem to care either way. She had fallen into a drunken void of despair.

  When Jayden had returned and finished putting the groceries away, she heard Silas and Razvan talking in the office. Her stomach fluttered at the sound of the Romanian vampire’s voice. She hadn’t seen him for three nights. She hurried to the office and stopped when she heard another voice, this one with a thick British accent. They were not alone.

  “I am sorry, Silas,” the voice said. “I am afraid there is not enough evidence to prove Selena had a hand in your friend’s demise. The autopsy report indicates that all signs point to a heart attack.”

  “But what about the signs of blood loss?” Silas protested. “Surely we all know what that means.”

  “All it proves to us is that a vampire fed from him shortly before he died. Being that he lived with a vampire, it is not unexpected…and to the mortal authorities it indicates a sign of anemia, nothing more.”

  Jayden sucked in a breath. Was this one of the famous Elders Razvan had mentioned? She peeked around the doorway and saw that Silas and Razvan were alone in the room.

  They spoke to the British vampire on the computer via webcam. He was startlingly handsome, with long black hair like Silas’s and startling silver eyes. It must be a rule that most vampires had to be almost illegally gorgeous, Jayden thought with a small smile.

  Razvan turned and glanced at her, unsurprised by her presence. His attention returned to the computer screen as if uninterested.

  “I never drank from him, Ian,” Silas remained fixed on the monitor, unaware of Jayden’s arrival.

  “Do you think anyone would believe that?” Ian countered, though not unkindly. “And from what the reports say, you had not Marked Mr. Gunderson, so it is irrelevant either way. They were not directly poaching your property by our laws. I do wish more could be done on our end about this unpleasant situation. Please believe that, McNaught.”

  “I do believe you,” Silas said. “And I believe that things would have worked out better if I could locate Delgarias.”

  “You are probably correct about that,” Ian replied. “But let me give you one more bit of advice from me and a few of the other Elders: You have immunity. Use it. Now I must go.”

  The computer screen went blank.

  Silas sighed and leaned back in his chair as he turned to Razvan. “I figured that things would be this way. At least it sounds like you’ve made headway ferreting out Selena’s spies in your territory. But we need to come up with another plan, before the bitch sends us a third note or kills someone else.”

  Razvan darted another glance at Jayden and quickly looked away. Jayden suddenly realized why he had been spending so much time in Spokane. Relief that he hadn’t been sleeping with someone else warred with anger at his lack of communication. She stormed into the room.

  “Why didn’t you tell me any of this before?” Jayden knew there was a hysteric note creeping into her voice but was helpless to stop it.

  Silas looked away, but not before she caught a look of shame on his face.

  Razvan was as calm and collected as usual, except that he was also avoiding her gaze.

  He tugged on his goatee a little before replying, “I didn’t think it was wise with the present condition of your mental state.”

  “My mental state?” Jayden nearly spluttered in shock as her rage and frustration seemed to boil over. “My mental state?” she repeated and stalked closer to the vampire, hands balled in quivering fists. “Your psychotic ex girlfriend just killed an innocent man because she’s obsessed with some prophecy and you’re concerned about my mental state?”

  Razvan did not reply. His glittering black eyes were inscrutable and appeared to be focused everywhere but in her direction. The implied shame made an alien kernel of pleasure blossom in her breast.

  Akasha came into the room for once without a beer in her hand. “What’s going on?”

  Silas said gently to Jayden, “Now, lass, we were only trying to protect you. You’ve been under enough stress what with learning to control your visions and being exposed to our kind. We thought it prudent to—”

  “To keep me in the dark lest I have a mental breakdown and slit my wrists?” Jayden cut him off, panting in rage. The Lord of Coeur d’Alene’s discomfort was more obvious, making that inner imp within rejoice. “I think I have the right to know when someone’s threatening to kill people because of me. Who the hell do you think you are to decide to keep that from me?”

  “He’s the Lord of this city,” Razvan countered smoothly.

  Jayden rounded on him, all pleasure crushed in a new rage of fury. The sanctimonious ass! “Oh that’s how it works. Never mind that he thinks I’m crazy and his wife has a major drinking problem but he keeps his head in the sand, refusing to see it!”

  She clapped a hand over her mouth, but it was too late.

  Silas rose to his feet. His eyes glowed neon green and his fangs bared in a mask of fury.

  “You go too far,” he growled. “Akasha does not have a problem. She’s just been under a lot of stress lately.”

  “Silas, no!” Akasha spoke for the first time. She met her husband’s eyes. Her pupils were dilated with pain and shame. “She’s right,” she said quietly.

  Jayden was stunned silent as Akasha put herself between her and Silas, one hand on her husband’s chest.

  “I probably do have a bit of a drinking problem,” she said, voice trembling as if fighting back tears. “And I think somehow you must have known that, ‘cuz you’ve kept me in the dark with the Selena situation along with Jayden.”

  Silas’s lips moved, but no sound came.

  Razvan chuckled, but there was no hu
mor in it. “I am surprised we have not yet been subjected to your wrath.”

  Akasha’s cheek dimpled with a half-smile despite the tears in her eyes. “I thought Jayden was handling it just fine on her own.”

  Jayden’s anger dissipated with her friend’s obvious pain. Guilt struck her like a sledgehammer. All of this was happening because of her. Max had been murdered, Silas and Razvan’s territories were in danger, and Akasha was nearly out of her mind with grief.

  “Maybe I should just give myself up to her,” she said softly. “Then Selena will leave you all alone.”

  Razvan’s chair clattered to the floor. He bared his fangs and growled, “You will not be going anywhere!”

  He charged forward, but Akasha seized his arm.

  “Jayden, don’t wuss out now. You belong with us.” she said, ignoring Razvan though still gripping him. “Come with me to Max’s room. We need to talk.”

  “O-okay,” Jayden stammered. All of her courage had fled.

  “She’s not going anywhere,” Razvan repeated with a low growl. “Not after speaking such foolishness.”

  Akasha turned cold amethyst eyes to him. “Do you want me to break your arm? Because if you keep being an asshole, I will do it. If anyone’s mentally unstable right now, it’s me…and I mean it. I will break your arm if you don’t stop.”

  Her grip tightened on Razvan’s arm and he winced in pain.

  “Akasha, lass,” Silas pleaded.

  “No,” she said as if there were an unspoken argument between them. “Your love and kindness can’t fix this.” She turned back to Razvan, her voice softened slightly. “I swear I won’t let her go anywhere, so chill.”

  For a moment Jayden thought that Razvan wouldn’t back down, but there was some silent communication between him and Akasha and he nodded curtly. Akasha released him and walked out of the room, nodding at Jayden to follow her.

  ***

  Akasha led Jayden into Max’s old room. She plopped on the bed and regarded Jayden with a determined look in her eyes. “You once told me that you wanted to be a counselor, so counsel me.”

  Jayden gaped. This was the last thing she expected her friend to say. “What?”

  “I accept that my drinking is out of control, but hell if I’m going into a bible-thumping twelve step program or checking into a rehab clinic with Selena’s bullshit going on.” Akasha lit a cigarette with shaky hands. “You mentioned that you took some college psychology classes, so you’re the best shot at help I can get. Are you willing to try? ‘Cuz it’s taking all my willpower to stay here talking to you and not get a beer.”

  “Yes!” Jayden answered before Akasha could bolt from the room. “You just caught me off guard a bit. I’d be happy to help you but I just don’t know how well I’ll do because I didn’t get my degree.”

  “Did you drop out because of the visions?” The concern in her voice made Jayden’s throat tighten again.

  “Sort of. I was homeless and living in my car when the fall semester began, so by then I wasn’t even thinking of school.”

  Akasha nodded. “That’s understandable. So can we start now?”

  Jayden sighed. “I guess. Um, go ahead and get comfortable or something.” She sat down in an easy chair near the bed and did her best to look professional and welcoming.

  Akasha lay down on the bed in a caricature of the typical Freud patient. “Now what?”

  “Well, I think if we explored the reasons for why you drink when you’re upset, we might be able to go from there,” Jayden told her, hoping that she was doing the right thing.

  At that thought, she added, “If I say anything that sounds like a load of crap, it very well might be, so don’t be afraid to call me on it, okay?”

  “Okay,” Akasha said somberly. She took a deep breath and began. “I’ve been drinking since I was twelve or thirteen, I can’t remember which, but I didn’t drink to get drunk, y’know, or even to cope with a problem until a year or so ago.”

  Jayden nodded and did her best to keep her expression passive but welcoming. “Why do you think it started then?”

  “I dunno… maybe because I started to get lonely. I mean, Max was great company and all,” she added defensively, “and Silas is wonderful, I mean he’s my life, but…I guess I missed talking with another girl, especially one who was different. Xochitl and the others practically lived with us before they moved to Seattle and made their big break.”

  Akasha sighed and shifted awkwardly on the bed. “Xochitl just had a way about making me feel better, about myself, about the world, whatever. Without her to comfort me when I had a bad day I guess I turned to the next best thing: beer.” She snorted derisively. “Like that came any close. I was such an ass, I knew it, but I couldn’t stop feeling that way.”

  The self-loathing in Akasha’s voice brought tears to Jayden’s eyes. She blinked them away and said soothingly, “You lost your best friend, your only friend, really. Pain was inevitable.”

  “But still, it wasn’t like I was all pissy because she was gone, I knew she had to follow her dream and all, just as I did. I was so damn proud of her, still am. I mean, that girl had determination. When she said, ‘I will,’ she fucking meant it…and somehow that determination rubbed off on everyone around her. That’s why Aurora’s the world’s fastest drummer and Sylvis is the best guitarist to walk the planet.”

  She lit a cigarette and smiled, pride dripping from her voice.

  “That’s why three chicks, one of them black at that, and a gay guy were able to play with the big boys in heavy metal. Not only that but I fucking know I wouldn’t have been so successful at my business if I hadn’t known her…and now look at me, I’m a fucking drunk who almost killed herself with alcohol poisoning the other day.” Anger crept back into her tone and she flicked her cigarette so hard that it broke.

  “Don’t be so hard on yourself.” Jayden said softly. “You had just attended Max’s funeral, and then heard that your friends disappeared on the same night. Anyone would have reacted strongly.”

  Akasha laughed, but it was a harsh, brittle noise, like cracking marble.

  “That’s not what made me lose it,” she said quietly. “Xochitl and the band are going to be fine. For one thing, Silas would have known if they were hurt, because of Marking them and all, and I really think I’d know, because, I dunno, but I think I would. No, I know they’re okay. Xochitl’s not afraid of anything and although I don’t know what she is, I know she can handle anything that anyone can dish out.”

  “Then what made you…lose it?” Jayden asked carefully, hoping she wasn’t going too far for this first session.

  Her “patient” took a deep shuddering breath. “It was the way Silas looked at me when we heard the news. He was afraid of me. Afraid I’d freak out again and tear the place apart.” Akasha choked on the last word, but continued speaking between growing hiccupping sobs. “He’s my husband, the fucking love of my life…not only that, but he’s a fucking five hundred year old vampire! He’s… not… supposed… to… be afraid of me!”

  A keening wail escaped her throat and she grabbed a pillow and buried her face in it to stifle the sobs.

  With tears rolling down her own cheeks, Jayden stood up and crossed the small distance to the bed, and took Akasha into her arms, not caring if the visions came back, only needing to comfort her friend.

  The two women held each other and cried for what felt like an eternity.

  When it ended, Akasha slowly pulled away and wiped her nose with the bottom of her shirt.

  “Thanks,” she said huskily. “I actually kinda feel better now. I know that sounds weird, but there it is.”

  Jayden squeezed Akasha’s hand. She felt better too. Now that she’d actually helped someone, the healing light of purpose was a balm on her soul.

  Chapter Twenty-four

  Akasha’s daily counseling sessions with “Doctor” Leigh continued…only from now on they did them before sunset to avoid interruptions from the men. Akasha told her
about her traumatic past. Besides the things that Max had narrated to Jayden, Akasha also had been abducted by government agents, experimented on like a lab rat, and almost killed just before her high school graduation.

  When Akasha began talking about earning her college degree and opening Resurrection Wrenches, Jayden interrupted her.

  “You never really had a childhood, did you?”

  Akasha blinked at her. “Well, no.”

  It was then that they had another epiphany. Besides being her first and only friends, Xochitl, Sylvis, Aurora and Beau had been Akasha’s only link to a normal childhood. The same went for Max, as he was the closest thing to a father she’d had since she was eight.

  Jayden had an epiphany of her own. With the suddenness of how she and Razvan got together, was it possible that her infatuation with him was childish? After all, he was technically her rescuer.

  Maybe I should distance myself a little from him until I get it figured out, she thought. But figure what out? Razvan had never given a hint that he harbored any deeper feelings about her than lust and possessiveness….and aside from a few heated glances, the lust seemed to have vanished. She forced the thought away and focused on Akasha.

  Their mock therapy was going pretty well. A punching bag was installed downstairs for anger management and Akasha pelted it regularly. She was also down to an average of three beers a night instead of the usual half-rack and she only got drunk one night a week instead of every day. Jayden wished Akasha would just quit drinking completely, but she supposed she’d have to be grateful for some progress, especially since, most important of all, Akasha finally reopened her shop.

  The fact that she was ready to re-embrace her love of turning wrenches was a clear indication that she was healing. Jayden accompanied her to work every evening to hold the flashlight and continue with the counseling sessions.

  Silas and Razvan were also making progress. They were confident that they had eliminated all of Selena’s spies from their lands.