by A B Turner
"We need need bodies on the ground, Carrie, Diana is obviously going to be running the whole thing single-handed now, which has meant all the experienced staff will be working directly with her," she paused to see if I was actually understanding what was coming, clearly my face was registering the level of confusion I was feeling inside. Jacquie sighed before apologising about her lack of clarity, I shook my head,
"I should be apologising, I'm just not sure what you want me to do, as a body on the ground?"
After offering me a biscuit, we sat together as she explained, I was needed to be at the door as a kind of meeter and greeter, was Jacquie's description. When all the guests had arrived, I would then be expected to mingle with them, offering copies of the book and answering any questions about the author.
"So you mean like a host?" I asked, Jacquie beamed,
"Exactly."
Her smile quickly turned into a concerned frown,
"Question is, Carrie, can you do it?"
I hesitated, which she instantly noticed,
"You won't be there on your own, okay? There's a whole gang of people going..." she sounded reassuring, but I couldn't entirely forget the fact I had absolutely no experience at this kind of event. Jacquie laughed,
"Nobody does the first time, love, but like many other things, you won't know you can do it until you try."
I smiled at the obvious double entendre and felt compelled to answer in the same way,
"Well, I have learnt a lot through hands on experience."
She smiled,
"Well, it's time to get your hands on this then..." She jabbed at the file on her desk, "I'm guessing it's not the first time someone has said that to you!"
We both roared with laughter until a voice behind us spoke,
"Good to know you're all having such a good time while the ship is sinking, how every Titanic, I'm assuming a chorus of 'Abide with me' will start any moment."
I spun round in the chair to see Diana standing in the doorway, before I had a chance to say anything, Jacquie spoke,
"Carrie has agreed to help out at the launch."
Diana looked at me quizzically,
"Are you sure you're ready for this?"
Without really thinking and before I could stop the word, I heard myself say Kat's favourite expression,
"Absofuckinglutely."
From behind me I could hear Jacquie simultaneously laughing while choking on a biscuit, while I sat, hoping the floor would open up and swallow me whole. I was about to apologise, when Diana spoke, her facial expression remaining unchanged,
"Well, it's good to know you're keen on manning a lifeboat, Carrie, although if you could keep the sailor language down to a minimum, that would be great."
I mumbled an 'of course', still feeling incredibly embarrassed by my outburst. Diana turned her attention to Jacquie,
"Keep me informed, Jax, okay?"
Jacquie, obviously still with a mouthful of unchewed biscuit, offered a thumbs-up and Diana left us,
"I cannot believe I said that," I said.
Jacquie reached across her desk and patted my hand,
"Don't worry sweetheart, I'm sure Diana's heard a lot worse, but your face? Comedy gold, anyway, enough of this, we need to get you up to speed for the launch."
"When is it?" I asked, hoping I had at least a week or two to prepare,
"Friday, love," Jacquie replied shortly, once more, for the second time in as many minutes, I wanted the floor to open up under my chair.
"You mean, this Friday? The Friday that's in two day’s time?"
"That's the one, so you'd better get reading the epic, I've got a copy here somewhere," Jacquie answered and she started the now-familiar routine of ferreting through countless drawers before triumphantly tossing a large paperback across her desk. I looked at the cover, there was no picture at all, it was completely blue with just the words, ''Pushing Through’ written across in black. As I flicked through the first few pages, I asked Jacquie if it was any good,
"I haven't read it, love, but it must be something special,the series has been on the best sellers list both here and in the States."
I stood up to leave, but then Jacquie glanced up,
"You'd better get home, sweetheart, and get reading, there's a briefing session Friday morning at 7.00 so you need to know that book inside and out by then."
Just as I started to walk to the door, Jacquie spoke again,
"Oh and before you go, the launch is at this place, I don't suppose you know it, do you?"
She spun her computer screen around so I could see it, and there was a picture of the hotel where I had first met Vanessa.
"Yes, I know it," I answered quietly.
"Brilliant, love, I'll tell Diana, that will make things a bit easier."
I forced myself to look away from the screen, I didn't want to arouse Jacquie's curiosity, so I just thanked her for the book and left her office. Once out of the building, I wandered into the nearby park, as it was the middle of the morning, there weren't many people around aside from a few mothers with young children and they were all on the far side of the pond, feeding the ducks. I hadn't ever thought I would go back there, to that hotel, and yet now, in only a couple of days, I'd be there again. It didn't seem possible, how life had this habit of allowing you to feel everything was finally reaching some kind of calm, just before something was about to happen that could potentially throw you into chaos again. As I walked, I came to the conclusion, the only way this would work, would be for me to just put all the emotions that building had witnessed to one side, after all, this time was entirely different, I was there to work and to do that with any hope of success, I needed to stop dwelling on the past.
"You can do this," I said to myself, as defiantly as I could muster, then I walked through the wrought iron gates and out of the park.
As Jacquie had advised, the next two days I barely stopped reading to eat, drink or even sleep, I even found myself making a few notes to remind me of the various plot lines. But all the effort was worth it, because when Friday morning dawned, I felt perhaps only the author knew the story better than me.
Diana had asked for all the team to meet at the hotel reception for a final briefing, I opted to arrive early as I knew being back there might well have some kind of emotional effect on me and I knew I needed that to happen when I was alone. After getting the train, I walked to the hotel, the city was alive with the sound of the business day starting to wake. As the ever-growing crowd passed me, I couldn't help but notice how some were striding purposefully ahead, whereas others seemed barely awake at all, as if working on some kid of autopilot which would get them to their destination without any real input from them. I was genuinely enjoying my people watching, so when I turned the corner to see the imposing edifice of the hotel in front of me, it quite took my break away. I stood for a moment, allowing my eyes wander over the lavish building, the tumbling flower arrangements from the windows causing vibrant slashes of colour against the deep, golden stone. Even though the sun hadn't quite reached this part of the city, the building still seemed to glow, as if somehow radiating it's sheer beauty. My wandering eyes rested on the windows of the highest floor, it was behind those very shutters, where I had met Vanessa, it seemed like a lifetime ago, all that emotion, those hidden nights we had shared so much, were now memories which would never be repeated. For a few moments, I felt lost in those thoughts, until I noticed the uniformed doorman eyeing me with a mixture of interest and suspicion. So after taking a deep breath, I walked towards the large, glass doors, he ripped his hat,
"Good morning, Madam and welcome."
I thanked him as I passed through the now-opened door and into the reception. As it was still quite early, the ornate lobby was still and quiet, two receptionists were at the long, highly-polished desk glanced up at me,
"Good morning, I am here with Diana Golding, for the book launch this evening," I said pre-empting their enquiry.
"Good morning
," replied one, "I do hope everything goes well."
I thanked her and started towards the group of leather armchairs at the far end of the reception, as that seemed the logical place to wait for everyone else. My shoes seemed to echo loudly as I crossed the vast space towards them, I was about to sit down, when I heard a shrill,
"Carrie!"
Before I could do anything, a handbag was thrown down next to me, followed by a gleaming pair of black patent, stilettos and bringing up the rear, a rather flustered Kat. While leaning on the back of my chair, she slipped off her flat shoes and started trying to put on the high heels. She was obviously so intent at not falling over, it took a few moments before she realised I was watching with vague amusement,
"Don't say it, you know I'm not a morning person," she said grumpily, I smiled warmly,
"You never have been, but do you think you should be a 'I've got my shoes on' person?"
Kat grimaced, grabbed my arm and started to pull at the unhelpful shoe, for some reason, she suddenly jerked, as the shoe finally acquiesced causing her to almost fall backwards. As she slammed down her foot, she must have hit the discarded handbag as the contents spilled out on to the floor, I heard Kat sigh heavily as she stared at the mess,
"Tell me it's not going to be one of those days."
We both leant down and collected her belongings together, soon the bag was full and firmly zipped, which meant, by the time Kat sat down in the chair opposite me she looked every inch the professional.
I was about to speak again, when the French doors opened behind her, for a split second I half-expected to see Vanessa standing there, just as she had done once before. I must have looked frozen as I was snapped out of this dreamlike state by Kat's voice,
"Hey sweetheart, are you alright?"
I smiled and reassured her, a handsome young man appeared at the door and walked quickly passed us, Kat grinned broadly,
"So that's what caught your eye?" Sorry honey, none of that today, there will be no time for flirting."
"That's a shame," I smiled back, as we both rested back in our respective chairs,
"What a beautiful place, if this is just the reception, can you imagine what the suites must be like?" Kat mused, I nodded and smiled back. As so many times before, I wanted to share with her everything that had happened here, I could imagine her expression when I told her about Vanessa. But, again, as so many times before, I said nothing, my promise to Frank had to be honoured, even though so much time had passed. So we sat there, simply enjoying the calm splendour of our surroundings, perhaps both lost in our own thoughts. Our peace was soon broken by the arrival of the rest of the team, some clearly enamoured with the luxurious setting while others seemed almost weary of being in such a place, barely even looking around as they walked across the reception. Kat quickly introduced me,
"So this is Carrie's first launch," she continued," but don't be mistaken, she's very smart, very quick and will have no problems keeping up with you lot," she added smiling.
They all welcomed me warmly, assuring me I'd be fine, except one guy who looked as if he had only woken up a few minutes earlier,
"Welcome to the front line, soldier, just make sure you keep your head down when Diana starts shooting," he said gloomily.
"Meet Jake, as you can tell Carrie, he brings the joy to this kind of job."
Everyone chuckled while Jake playfully poked out his tongue at Kat,
"Whereas I bring my own gun, it seems," I turned to see Diana standing behind my chair, she looked down at me,
"Don't worry Carrie, I might shoot but I never miss my target," she smiled and looked back at Jake, “which will be you, Jacob, if you don't arrive for work looking even slightly presentable."
At first he didn't move, but then as his eyes met Diana's icy stare, he quickly stood and disappeared through the bathroom doors in the very corner of the lobby. After a few tense minutes, he reappeared, he had obviously smoothed down his unruly hair with water and his tie was now firmly at his neck with the shirt collar buttoned. As he returned to the group, he stopped in front of Diana,
"Better?" he asked hopefully, she sighed,
"Marginally."
He sat down while she handed out a copy of the itinerary to each of us, it reminded me slightly of a school timetable, neatly typed instructions all arranged within a grid. Our names were highlighted and I was relieved to see I was to be working in tandem with Kat, although everyone else seemed very friendly, I knew, as this was my first time it would be easier to be with her.
Diana seemed to race through her brief, pausing only to make sure there were no questions, perhaps, unsurprisingly, I felt I had plenty to ask, but opted to keep silent. I knew I could rely on Kat for help, but I was more concerned about not appearing completely hopeless either in front of Diana or the rest of the team.
After over an hour, Diana snapped shut her file and tossed it into her open leather briefcase which rested at her feet,
"Well everyone, that's the day we have ahead of us, you all know what needs to be done, so I shall leave you for now, but I will be back at five to host the press briefing. Any problems, please call me immediately, let's not have a repeat of the ice sculpture fiasco, as I have no desire to don diving gear again to rescue you all."
As we laughed, she picked up her case, strode across the reception and out through the doors, only stopping momentarily to thank the doorman. Her swift departure obviously signalled the proper start of the working day as the group quickly dispersed to begin their duties, Kat took my arm,
"Come on, Carrie, time to hustle sweetheart, it might look like we've got hours to get this done, but, believe me, that time flies."
She led me through the French doors which opened into a huge room, dominated by three enormous crystal chandeliers hanging from the vaulted ceiling. There were ornate mirrors on three of the walls which reflected the light into the centre of the room. Circular tables, each with four gilt chairs, had been arranged across the panelled, polished floor. Each table was already covered by a deep cream tablecloth and laid with glittering silver cutlery, shining glasses and perfectly-folded napkins.
It was breathtaking, it was like stepping on to the most glamorous of movie sets, at first, I was almost reluctant to move as I didn't want to spoil the sheer beauty of the room. But Kat clearly had other ideas, she had walked ahead of me, but stopped when she realised I hadn't really moved,
"Come on, Carrie, hop to it, like I said, we haven't got all day, " she insisted, "There's a lot to do to get this room right."
At first, I found it hard to imagine what else could possibly be needed, but when I followed her to the stage at the far end of the room, it became clear, as I saw several large storage boxes neatly stacked in one corner. I watched as Kat opened the first and pulled out a large banner,
"Right let’s get this up first, they're always a right bitch to get straight."
After almost half an hour of struggling both with the sign and the fixings, at last we were able to look up at our handiwork with a degree of satisfaction. Kat frowned, then cocked her head to one side,
"It certainly looks okay," she said quietly, as if she was talking to herself, "but we can't argue with the thing any more, Diana can check it again when she gets here, if it's a millimetre out, she will spot that from a mile away, don't know how she does it really."
We started opening the other boxes, some were filled with leaflets, each one with a portrait of the author,it was rather somber,
"Not the happiest of men, is he?" I asked, Kat paused and squinted carefully at the picture,
"If you ask me, he looks a bit constipated."
I chuckled,
"I suppose that gives the title of his book an added meaning, for a moment, Kat seemed puzzled by my comment, but then, after looking back at the leaflet, she roared,
"Pushing Through!"
We both laughed and returned to arranging the publicity material, as per the diagram on the itinerary. Our last task was
to put a few tastefully-arranged stacks of the book on the table, while we worked, Kat reiterated what our function would be at the launch itself. It all seemed fairly straightforward, I had read the book so I was relatively confident I would be able to talk about it, when the time came, however, that calm assurance was replaced with a degree of unease when Kat mentioned the press meeting Diana would be hosting about now.
"So there will be photographers around, Carrie, with this kind of event and with the kind of guests attending, it's only to be expected."
At the mention of the word, 'photographer', an image of the pudgy man who seemed to have been everywhere when I was seeing Vanessa, popped into my mind. Suddenly my head filled with panic, supposing he was here tonight? Supposing he recognised me? What the hell could I do or say? I looked at Kat, she was still carefully placing the books, I was almost overcome with the desire to tell her everything now, so she could help or advise or do something to help me. But once more, I kept my now- growing fears to myself, I knew I should try and find out more, to try and prepare,