Seduce Me (The Heart Series)

by Angela Estienne

  “Morning nurse,” I replied.

  “I believe you will be discharged from the hospital today. We have got to wait for the doctor to make his rounds, but I think we are good to go.” She took my blood pressure and temperature once again, “lovely. That’s all normal. I think it’s time to take your catheter out, and how about we get rid of that cannula from your hand, does that sound good?”

  “Good, yes.” This was music to my ears.

  “I won’t be a minute, let me get what I need, I will be back in a tick.” I looked at Caitlin.

  “She’s very jolly. I like her.”

  “She has been like that every day. She comes in on a morning, checks your blood pressure and temperature, then fills in your chart. She goes away and comes back and gives you a bed bath, changes the sheets and puts a new drip up for you, then she empties the bag from your catheter. Her care for you has been impeccable.” The nurse came back in and drew the curtains shut.

  “Now stay nice and relaxed, this may pinch a little. Bend your knees up for me so your heels are touching your bum and let your knees drop to the side. That’s it good girl.” She placed one hand below my abdomen and carefully pulled the catheter out. Wow, that did nip a bit. “You may feel as though you need to urinate constantly for at least the next hour. This is perfectly normal, so don’t go worrying. Now let’s get this cannula out of your hand.” She went so careful. I turned away. I hated needles. “All done, can you press on this cotton wool for me?”

  “Yes,” I replied. Wow, that was painless. She’s good. I pressed hard on the cotton wool ball, she grabbed some micro porous tape and placed it over the cotton wool to keep it in place, “if you can wait for the doctor to give you the final go ahead, then you can get out of this place.” She wasn’t kidding about needing the toilet, every two minutes I went to the toilet, but when I sat down nothing happened. It was such a strange sensation.

  When the doctor came around, he was happy to discharge me. Caitlin helped me get dressed, and then she took me home. She hadn’t left my side in eight days. Dylan told me Cat was given two weeks off work to take care of me. She was a nursery school teacher, and it was still term time, so I knew this must have been a special favour that the school had given her.

  As we pulled up outside the house, I looked at my split screen camper van, she’s my baby. When I bought her, she was candy white in colour, so I always called her Candy. I took her everywhere with me. When I visited Greg every other weekend, this was my mode of transport. A few years ago I had a full restoration done on her, custom paint job and the interior was now like new. My emotions were ready to erupt again at the thought of her sitting all alone on my driveway. I wonder what happened to Greg’s Volkswagen Beetle, which I named Poppy.

  “Cat, where is Poppy?”

  “The police had her towed away for evidence.” I started to feel sick again. I went inside and went straight upstairs to bed. Cat brought me my painkillers that the hospital had given me. I managed to eat a bit of toast, and I drifted off to sleep.

  I woke up sweating, finding it hard to breathe. I still couldn’t remember the accident, but when I was asleep, small fragments of the incident came back to me. I was upside down with my seatbelt still fastened. My head was hurting. I noticed flashing blue lights out of the corner of my eye. I could hear sirens and screaming in the distance. God it was so loud, it was hurting my ears, but who was screaming? Then it goes silent. I can hear faint voices talking. “This wasn’t my fault. I was trying to lose the paparazzi. They are still hounding me. It’s all because of you. This is your mess, not mine. Don’t you try and blame this on me!” I could hear people moving around outside the car, and then it all goes dark.

  I felt panicked as I walked out of the bedroom, and found Caitlin in the spare room, she woke up.

  “What’s up babe?”

  “I had a nightmare about the accident.” She got out of bed and took me back to my bedroom. I felt so disorientated, frightened, and confused.

  “Come on lay back down. Close your eyes, it will all be fine, it was all a bad dream. I am right here with you.” She held my hand until I fell asleep.

  The next morning, when I tried to sit up, I realised this wasn’t a bad dream. Greg was really dead. NO! This couldn’t be happening to me. I started screaming, I was hysterical. How was I going to live without him? Cat came flying into the bedroom.

  “Jazz hun, it’s all right.” She cradled me in her arms “I am here, don’t worry we will get through this together. Shh lay back down, calm down.” Later Cat brought some food in for me. I was still finding it hard to eat.

  “You have to eat something babe,” she said.

  “But I am not hungry.”

  “I know darling, but you will end up making yourself ill. These painkillers won’t be kind to your stomach you know, do you want an ulcer?”

  “No.”

  “Then you need to eat something, try to have a bite.” Cat was so bloody sensible, always had a good strong head on her shoulders. It was annoying because I knew she was right.

  Cat kept bringing food into me, but I still couldn’t face a lot. Caitlin sat watching me like a hawk, making sure that I would eat something. I managed little bits of toast to keep her happy. I didn’t want to fall out with her. She could be very forceful when she needed to be. I watched her sitting down watching me, her Auburn hair flowing untamed around her head. It reminded me of lion’s mane, her big brown beady eyes watching my every move. She was my protector. I loved her like a sister. She only ever had my best interest at heart.

  As the week progressed, I got stronger, the tears still freely flowed, I was so sad, I couldn’t believe Greg was gone. Now I had to sort out the funeral. We had never talked about death, or even what we wanted if something ever happened to one of us. I always thought we had plenty of time for that after we were married. Caitlin contacted Greg’s parents on my behalf. They had disowned me, even blaming me for their son’s premature death. They said I should have been driving that night not Greg, and I should have been the one that had died, not their son. They took over the funeral. I wasn’t allowed to contribute in any shape or form towards the arrangements. Even the inscription on his headstone was out of my hands.

  Later, I headed off to the chapel of rest. I wanted, needed to be with him one last time. I was living a nightmare. When I walked in, the grief was overwhelming, a tight belt gripped my throat. I tried in vain to fight back the tears. He looked so peaceful, as though he was sleeping. I sobbed as I was talking to him, then I kissed him and said my final goodbyes. I headed back home, fell onto my bed, and broke down once more.

  The funeral was a very traumatic experience. It was bad enough that I had just buried my fiancé, but Greg’s parents had fire coming out of their mouths. They had turned evil. The hatred that spilled out in my direction was intolerable. They were acting as if I wasn’t hurting, they pushed all the blame on me. I went home after the funeral and locked myself away. I couldn’t take normal life anymore. I was so lonely. I wanted Greg back at my side, to love and protect me, to share in the highs and lows that life slings at you.

  I walked around the apartment in a daze. The days and weeks passed so slowly, everything I touched reminded me of him. I couldn’t escape the pain. I had a dark cloud following me into every room. I was finding it harder to take on the weekends due to Greg working away during the week. He had his own apartment near where he was working. We were going to merge both places after the wedding.

  I got some boxes and started packing up his possessions. I started with his clothes, god this was hard. Everything I touched sent my mind back into a dark hole. I could still smell his unique scent. The memories started to flood back from his clothing. My heart sunk each time a familiar piece was placed in the box, but I knew I had to pack his things away for my own sanity. Nevertheless, it was so difficult. It took me two days to pack his clothes away. Thankfully, he didn’t leave many personal possessions at my house. Only the essentials, most of his
stuff was at his own place.

  What was I going to do with his possessions once I had finished packing them away? I sent all his items back to his parents. I couldn’t be doing with any more painful encounters with them, but I had a few things that they weren’t getting, they were the most precious things I possessed. One of which was our photo albums. They would be staying with me forever. They would have to pry them from my dead corpse before I let them go.

  I started heading down to the cemetery every day. I needed to talk to him, tell him how I was doing, hoping that one day soon we would be together again. Not even death could truly keep us apart. His headstone was still missing a few weeks after the funeral. I was on a mission to chase the people down. How could he rest properly without a headstone? I contacted the funeral home, and they promised to have it in place by tomorrow at the latest. Well at least I managed to sort something out. The next day I headed down to Greg. When I arrived his headstone had been put in place. It was grey marble with white flecks running through it with gold writing. I sat down to read what his parents had inscribed.

  “Gregory Mitchell

  Aged: 23

  Born 29 January 1984–Died 18 February 2007

  Beloved son, of George and Susan Mitchell

  Cruelly taken from us before his time

  Sleep tight our angel.”

  I was horrified by what they had put, not even one mention of his fiancé, how could they be that cruel? I couldn’t understand their mentality. This was worse than losing him. I felt like they had kicked me well and truly in the gut.

  I couldn’t take anymore. Within a few days, I had quit my job. I went into town and put my apartment up for sale. I hired a removal firm to help me put all my excess things into a storage unit. I hired a solicitor to deal with my affairs and to liaise with the estate agents on my behalf. I left him my mobile phone number to contact me. I sat down and wrote a letter for Caitlin.

  “Caitlin.

  Just a quick note to let you know that I am not insane, nor suffering a nervous breakdown ‘well maybe a little bit.’ I need to get away from this place, I am being driven mad here. I cannot think straight, I am surrounded by memories, this apartment is making things worse.

  Thank you for always being around for me, I love you with all my heart, please don’t be mad with me.

  I will ring you in a few days when I am settled.

  Hugs and Kisses Jazz xxx.”

  I filled my little camper van, with all of my important possessions and clothing. I now wanted to escape from this nightmare I was living in. Caitlin and Dylan were great, if not slightly annoying, wanting me to get out of the apartment, go out for a drink, catch a film, but it was no use. Although I had not talked my plans through with anyone, Cat was going to be pissed when she found out what I was doing, but I had to do something, everywhere I looked reminded me of what I had lost. A fresh start in a new town, new job, running away was my only logical option.

  Chapter 2

  I sat in my V Dub, dazed and confused, not sure, where I would end up. I swallowed more painkillers so I could drive. Laying the map on the seat next to me, I closed my eyes and set my finger down, now I had my destination, Newtown. It seemed to fit my circumstances, so off I went waving good-bye to my old life.

  Halfway through my journey I felt tired out, so I pulled into a service station and locked up the van. My first point of call was the toilets. I was desperate, I sighed in relief as natures call was answered. Now I needed a well-deserved caffeine fix. Walking around the food counter, I picked up a muffin, and got my much-needed coffee. I walked away and found an empty seat. My phone started ringing, by the time I had plucked it out of my overflowing bag it had stopped, shit it was Dylan. I daren’t ring him back. He would know I was up to something, so I put it away back in my handbag and drunk my coffee. I sat there wondering what the hell I was going to say to him, I couldn’t avoid him forever and more to the point, what was I going to say to Caitlin?

  Once finished I strolled back to my van. On route, I found a post box and posted Caitlin’s letter. Now I was ready for the rest of my journey. I didn’t want to arrive too late. I still needed to find somewhere to sleep for the night. I would normally have slept in the dub, but I had it crammed full of all my things.

  Thankfully, it was still daylight when I arrived, so I went in search for somewhere to sleep for the evening. I drove around for ages scouting the area looking for a cheap hotel. I pulled up outside The River Run Hotel. This looked like a perfect place to get my head down for the night. I pulled up into the car park and grabbed my overnight bag, locked up my van, and headed inside to the reception.

  I was that nervous I was physically shaking. It was at that moment self-doubt hit hard, was I doing the right thing? This all seemed like a good idea at the time, was I been too rash? Should I turn around and head back home? I wished I had told Cat about my plans, I felt so guilty she was my best friend. I never kept secrets from her. I turned around and walked back to the van. I wasn’t sure anymore.

  I sat in the driver’s seat and put my head in my hands. What am I doing? I grabbed my phone out of my bag. I had better ring Cat. No you will regret it, come on Jasmine, you know this is the only way. You have come this far, if you don’t like it, you can move back home. Remember why you are doing this. Give it a chance. You have nothing more to lose. Yes, I have no choice. I put the phone back in my bag, took in a deep breath, come on Jazz get your arse in there, and sort yourself a room out for the night. I pulled myself together and headed back to the front door. I was now taking steady breaths trying to calm myself down.

  I opened the door and walked into the foyer. I was instantly struck by the floor. It was beautiful, terracotta tiling with some blue tiles thrown in so it made a pretty pattern. I took another shallow breath and headed straight to the reception area. One foot in front of the other, nice and steady, don’t rush yourself. I looked up, above me was the largest glass chandelier that I had ever seen in my life. As I was looking around I noticed some bright-red velvet curtains hanging at the windows. When I looked ahead I saw the reception desk. It was a highly polished mahogany counter top with a gold bell on it. It was gleaming. I could see my own reflection. Behind the desk lay an open wooden cupboard with lots of key’s hung up.

  I reached the reception desk and rang the bell. Stop shaking Jasmine. A middle-aged gentleman came out from an office and stood behind the counter. He wore a dark-blue suit with a white shirt. His very bold blue and white striped tie struck me. Henry Horseman, Desk Manager was printed on a name badge that was attached to his jacket.

  “Hello Miss, how may I help you?” I was still so nervous I found it hard to speak.

  “Hi Mr Horseman, I was wondering if you had a vacant room for tonight please?”

  “One moment and I will check for you.”

  “Thank you,” I replied. He started typing away on the computer. This was taking ages. My stomach was tied up in knots, whilst I was stood there waited for an answer.

  “We do have a room free.” Finally!

  “That’s great.”

  “Can I ask you to fill out this form?” He slid a piece of paper over to me. I filled in my details, signed on the dotted line and paid. He handed me my room key.

  “Would you like some help with your bag’s Miss?”

  “No thank you. I have got it.” He then gave me directions to the elevator. I started walking off and then stopped and turned around.

  “Mr Horseman?”

  “Yes Miss.”

  “Is there somewhere I could grab some dinner? I am new in town?”

  “Yes, give me a moment Miss.” He walked away into the office and came back with directions for me to follow.

  “This is a lovely little local restaurant. It’s not far away, are you here on business or pleasure?”

  “Neither, I am looking for a fresh start. I need to find some permanent residence tomorrow and then go job hunting.”

  “I know of a house that is vaca
nt at the minute, well I believe it’s still free anyway. Here let me jot down the details for you.”

  “Aww you are so kind, thank you.” He smiled.

  “Ok, you are looking for Mr or Mrs Chambers. They own a corner shop on Green Dale Avenue, tell them I sent you.”

  “Thank you again.” I shook his hand and walked off to the elevators.

  “Good luck Miss.” He shouted after me. I turned around and smiled at him.

  “Thank you again.” He gave me a friendly salute and a nod of his head. What a lovely guy, very friendly. I found my room and dropped my overnight bag on the bed. I headed straight to the bathroom. I threw a bit of cold water on my face and had a quick freshen up. I grabbed my handbag and headed off to find the restaurant.

  It was a clear night. The air was cool, but it felt good against my skin. It had only taken me twenty minutes to find the restaurant, not bad going. I was thankful for the slow walk if I was honest with myself. I opened the door. It had a very oldie worldie feel to the place. Wooden tables with red and white chequered table cloths, salt and pepper pots placed in the centre, with white triangular napkins tucked in behind. It had magnolia walls with countryside pictures scattered around on them. I breathed in, what a wonderful aroma I could smell. It seemed like some sort of spice, maybe a curry cooking. I sat down and took a quick look at the menu. I still didn’t have much of an appetite, but I needed to eat because of the painkillers. I hated it when Cat’s voice would replay in my head. She was so sensible, it was frustrating, but as usual she was right, again. I didn’t want an ulcer to appear, just because I didn’t fancy food. Something light was definitely in order. A young waitress headed over to me.