The Amish Seasons Collection: Contains An Amish Spring, An Amish Summer, An Amish Autumn, and An Amish Winter

by Sarah Price

  “What kind of ill, Naomi?”

  She gave a little shrug and looked away. They sat on folding chairs near one of the windows and away from the circle of older women who gathered near the fireplace to talk. “The working kind, I reckon.”

  Drusilla frowned. “I don’t understand.”

  “Miriam.”

  “Miriam?”

  Naomi nodded. “Miriam was the worker in the family. She brought home her money and gave it to Daed. We counted on that money, Drusilla, even if it was only $1500 a month. Now that she’s gotten married, that money belongs to her and her husband.”

  Drusilla didn’t quite understand.

  “Daed. He wasn’t telling tall tales at Thanksgiving. He’s broke. No money at all,” Naomi whispered. “Between the garden and the small dairy herd, we lived as long as we supplemented it with Miriam’s money. He’s got no savings, no investments, nothing. Maem doesn’t know the extent of this. She always left the financial part of the household to Daed to handle. She knew we were facing some tough times, but not like this. We don’t even have money to buy grain for the herd! And you know what happened to our hay. He sold most of the bales he cut during the summer so we’re almost out of that, too! The burden of dealing with this problem is falling on my shoulders.”

  “Oh Naomi!”

  Drusilla knew that her uncle frequently borrowed equipment from her father and she knew that her father was getting fed up with it, especially when Jake wanted the equipment at the exact times that Amos needed it. Whenever Amos said no, Jake often began revisiting his complaint that Amos’s farm was the better farm and their father had not provided an equal gift to him. But to hear that her cousins and their family were living hand to mouth from their daily work was shocking to her. This, she thought, is why Caleb wants his own farm so that he is not at the mercy of any other person, nor does he become their burden.

  “Don’t be saying anything to your daed,” Naomi gushed. “My daed would be so angry.”

  Drusilla hesitated. To not say anything was not like lying, yet she knew that if she didn’t tell her father, she would be hiding a very serious problem that impacted their extended family. “I…I don’t know how I can do that, Naomi,” Drusilla said slowly. “If you are in trouble and hurting, how can I turn my back on you? That would not be very Christian of me.”

  Naomi grabbed her hands and held them, staring into Drusilla’s face. “If your daed learned how bad this situation is, my daed would be embarrassed, Drusilla, and that would just hurt him even more than being broke. He would never forgive me.”

  “Forgiveness is what we do,” Drusilla said drily, not certain how to react to this new side of Naomi. Was this the same sassy cousin who always had something to say and no hesitation saying it? Was this the one relative that Drusilla always knew would stand up against wrongs, just because she knew that what was right was better? “For if you forgive men when they sin against you, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. But if you do not forgive men their sins, your Father will not forgive your sins.”

  Naomi dropped Drusilla’s hands and stood before her, her shoulders slumped and arms hanging at her sides. “He wants me to go to market,” she said, “and I can’t do that, Drusilla. I’m not like Miriam.”

  There was nothing else that Drusilla could say. She glanced around to ensure that the older women were engrossed in their conversations. When she saw that no one was paying any attention to them, Drusilla pulled Naomi into her arms and embraced her. “Maybe your daed will talk to mine. I mean he did announce that there were problems at Thanksgiving dinner. Mayhaps they will talk about it on their own. But, in the meantime, I promise I won’t do anything to harm you,” she whispered before she released her.

  “Danke, Drusilla.”

  Always the strong one, the now weakened Naomi seemed to gather some strength from Drusilla’s promise. But there was something defeated about how she clung to the hope that Drusilla would not tell anyone the dreadfully humiliating secret that she had shared. It didn’t matter how bad the situation was at their farm, Drusilla realized, as long as their pride remained in tact. And that was the biggest sin that could never be disclosed to the community for fear that the bishop might shun not just the father but the entire family for having let it happen to begin with.

  Chapter Six

  The weekend before Christmas, Caleb arrived earlier than usual. Since he had spent Thanksgiving with the Riehls, both he and Drusilla would spend Christmas with his family. This Sunday, when Caleb returned to the Lapp farm, Drusilla would accompany him. For that reason, the Riehls decided to have a Christmas meal on Sunday so that the family could gather together to celebrate the birth of Jesus.

  All week, Drusilla had fretted about her Christmas gift for Caleb. Should she give it to him at her parents’ home or at his parents’? Would he like what she had made for him? She worried so much that her mother had finally spoken to her in private, asking her what was wrong and, upon learning the truth, had merely smiled.

  “Whatever you have for Caleb,” Esther had said with a gentle look upon her face, “will be just the right gift for him. He loves you for you, not for the gifts you give. You are, Drusilla, gift enough for that man.”

  Despite the calming words, Drusilla still could not stop worrying.

  After the worship service the previous Sunday, he had left almost immediately, barely having time to wish her more than a quick “Have a good week” and a “See you on Friday.” She had worried that something happened between her father and Caleb for there had been no time to talk about what Amos thought about Ohio. But the look on Caleb’s face when he did say goodbye had been enough to convince Drusilla that something had happened in that discussion that displeased Caleb, only he was too much of a gentleman to confide in her.

  Now that Friday was upon them, she might actually find out what happened.

  This weekend, because it was so close to the holidays, Drusilla and Caleb would not be traveling to visit relatives. Instead, they would spend the entire weekend at the Riehls’ farm. That suited Drusilla just fine. She didn’t fancy driving all over Lancaster County to visit relatives with the cold spell that had blown in from the North. The air was bitter cold and the threat of snow hung in the air.

  “I sure do hope it won’t start snowing until after Caleb arrives,” Drusilla said, more to herself than to anyone else as she gazed out of the window. It was dark outside, an eerie darkness that she did not like.

  “Oh help!” Hannah moaned. “Caleb, Caleb, Caleb! If that’s what married life is all about, I think it’s not for me!”

  “Shush, Hannah!” Drusilla countered with a scowl on her face.

  Daniel walked over and teasingly pushed Hannah’s shoulder. “Ja, shush! I can see you now…four or five years from now with a boppli in your arms. Mayhaps I’ll remind you of what you just said, Hannah!”

  She spun around and stuck her tongue at him.

  “Now stop it, you two,” Drusilla said, even though she was trying to hide her own smile at their playful exchange.

  Slowly, the family was beginning to feel more like it used to be, back before baby Anna was born with that awful colic and before Mammi Ana fell ill and died. The only person who still seemed lost was Jacob. He shuffled around, sitting for long spells on the sofa near the kitchen area. He would stare at the place where Ana’s hospital bed had once been.

  That he missed his wife, there was no doubt. Drusilla, however, worried that he wasn’t eating enough and that he was too quiet. Gone was the blustery sass that Jacob used to dish out, complaining about noisy children or lousy weather. Now he seemed to be just fading before their very eyes. While Drusilla was certain that the holidays were not helping, she also knew that he needed to come to terms with Ana’s passing in his own time.

  It dawned on her that, one day, she might be faced with the same situation. She had never really realized the true meaning of being married for life. She never wanted to be alone without Caleb and she became
distressed at the thought that, one day, she might be the one shuffling around her son or daughter’s house, mourning for the loss of her beloved husband.

  Now, as she turned to the window, the sky darkening even more rapid since there was a thick cloud cover overhead, she prayed for Caleb to hurry up and arrive. She didn’t want to waste one more minute without him by her side.

  The family gathered at the table for the evening meal. Caleb was unusually silent and Drusilla wished that she could find a way to speak with him in private. The timing of his arrival at the farm had been unfortunate since it coincided with everyone being in the house just before they ventured back outside for chores. And, of course, Caleb joined them without even a second’s hesitation. As he walked out the door, she sighed and realized that he took with him the only chance that she would have to talk privately with him until later in the night when they retired for bed.

  But for now, everyone bowed their heads in silence, a brief moment for each person to pray before they began to eat the meal, Drusilla prayed for Naomi’s family as well as her own. She especially prayed for her grandfather who still appeared lost without his wife by his side. For as rough and tough as Jacob often acted, he was demonstrating a far softer side that Drusilla had never seen before. His mourning for Ana touched her heart.

  The serving bowls began to move around the table, the younger boys quickly piling pasta and freshly baked rolls onto their plates. They worked hard when they returned home from school, helping Daniel and Amos in the barn and with other outdoor chores. In turn, their appetites seemed to increase, whether from the chores or the weather, Drusilla did not know. But she remembered how her energy drained much easier in the cold months and a big, hearty supper always made her feel better.

  With that realization, she glanced down at Caleb’s almost empty plate. He had no appetite and she worried that he was ill. Perhaps a cold, she wondered.

  Amos must have noticed, too, for he took the bowl of pasta and handed it to Caleb. “Must not be working hard enough at your daed’s,” he teased.

  Caleb gave a respectful smile and took the pasta, putting a little on his plate. “Working just fine, Amos. Danke,” he said and passed the bowl to Drusilla.

  “Caleb!” Henry practically shouted from the other side of the table. “Elam and I are making a sled tomorrow. Wanna help?”

  “Inside voice,” Esther reminded him. “And don’t talk with your mouth full.”

  “A sled?” Caleb scratched at his growing beard. “For what snow?”

  Henry laughed but, because his mouth was full, he didn’t answer.

  “Aw, it’s gonna snow a lot!” Elam answered for his brother. “Like last year! Farmer’s Almanac says so!”

  “It does, does it? Vell then,” Caleb said, “I best help a spell with your sled. At least before the gathering and after morning chores.”

  Both boys grinned, appeased that Caleb was going to help. Daniel made a funny noise and Drusilla glanced at him. It dawned on her that the relationship Caleb had with her two younger brothers was much different from the one Daniel had with them. She wondered if that bothered Daniel; they never asked him for help.

  “Mayhaps Daniel could help,” she offered. “I seem to recall he knows a thing or two about making sleds.”

  “Or crashing sleds,” Hannah offered, a mischievous gleam in her eyes. “Remember two winters ago?”

  The talk at the table continued as Daniel groaned and rolled his eyes. Hannah, however, began telling the story of Daniel making a sled and making Hannah and Henry ride it down a hill. The runners had not been tightened enough and, after one loosened, the sled ran into a tree. Henry suffered a black eye, Hannah a sprained wrist, and Daniel a bruised ego.

  For the rest of the meal, conversation focused on different memories of events, just as much for Caleb’s benefit as well as for the rest of the family. With the propane heater warming the room and the conversation warming the family, Drusilla felt Caleb slowly become more relaxed, releasing whatever had been bothering him.

  “Your daed told me that he doesn’t want us to move,” Caleb confided in her later that night. They had retired to bed shortly after nine o’clock and, once they were under the covers, Caleb began to tell her what had happened the previous weekend. “Said it’s too far away and too much for the family after the loss of your grandmother.”

  Drusilla wasn’t certain how to react. Part of her rejoiced. She hadn’t wanted to move away from her family. How could she miss future holidays, miss seeing Anna take her first steps, miss Daniel begin courting, miss Hannah take the kneeling vow, miss the boys and Elsie go through rumschpringe? However, she knew that Caleb wanted his own farm and that being forced to work in a store would be a hardship on him. On both of them, she realized. Without a farm to work, she would also need to get a job, perhaps even work at a market several days a week, and that was not something she ever thought was an appealing way to earn money.

  “I’m so sorry, Caleb,” she said and reached out to take his hand. “Perhaps next year? We can save our money and have a larger down payment for a farm. Mayhaps even here in Lancaster?”

  He nodded his head, but she sensed he felt a grave loss by missing out on this particular opportunity. His heart had been set on it.

  “Where will we live?”

  He shrugged his shoulders. “I reckon I’ll have to live here so I can be closer to my cousin’s hardware store.”

  While the thought of living at her parents didn’t bother Drusilla, especially since so many other young Amish couples did the same, she knew that it didn’t sit well with Caleb. And then, of course, there was the issue of working at the hardware store. That was a fine job for a young, single man. Now that he was married, did she really want him to pursue that as a career?

  “You can’t just work at your parents’ farm, then?”

  Leveling his gaze at her, he made a face. “Now Drusilla Lapp,” he said, “you know how I feel about that. Besides, a man has to provide for his own family, not burden his parents.”

  She smiled and pressed her hand to his cheek. “I highly doubt they would think you a burden.”

  He covered her hand with his, keeping it against his skin. He shut his eyes and sighed. “But this is what I would miss,” he said in a low voice, “waking up next to you.Your family needs your help. At my parents’ farm, you’d have to take an outside job and I don’t want that. People change when they work with the Englische. And I want you…” He paused and opened his eyes to stare at her. Leaning over, he blew the flame from the little lantern on the night table before he pulled Drusilla into his arms and whispered, “I want you just the way you are.”

  Chapter Seven

  The Christmas meal was to be served at noon, the perfect time for gathering because morning chores would be long over and late afternoon chores wouldn’t start for another four hours. The kitchen smelled of freshly baked bread, meatloaf, and potato casserole. Comforting smells that made the cold weather outside seem far away. The sides of meatballs and dutch noodles warmed on the oven while the large pan of homestyle macaroni and cheese sat on the counter, covered in tin foil so that it stayed warm.

  The gathering was small, just the Riehl family. On Christmas Day, they would go to Amos’s brother Eli’s house for fellowship. For now, however, it was nice to be together as a family.

  For this holiday meal, Drusilla and Esther worked side-by-side, preparing the food and delegating certain tasks to Hannah and Elsie. With just their family enjoying the meal, there was less pressure to prepare a lot of food, although when Drusilla looked back and saw how much was there, she realized they had cooked far too much for just their small family.

  “Maybe we should have invited the Jakes,” she said, referring to her uncle’s family. “We could easily feed half of the g’may with all this food!”

  Esther opened the oven and pulled out the two pans of meatloaf. “You think?” She smiled at Drusilla and shook her head. “I reckon there won’t be much left ove
r for shepherd’s pie, Dochder. You have three bruders, and two of them have hearty appetites these days, if you haven’t noticed!”

  “You ain’t talking ‘bout us now, are you?” Elam said as he poked his head around the corner from the sitting area.

  “It’s ‘aren’t’ and I most certainly am,” Esther shot back. “Now, go make yourself useful and fetch Dawdi Jacob. We’re just about ready for getting seated.”

  Elsie stood up. She had been playing a board game with Elam. “Should I fetch the men, Maem?”

  “Ja, danke, Elsie.” She began slicing the meatloaf and Drusilla neatly arranged it on one of two plates.

  By the time everyone entered the room, the food adorned the table. Remembering her mother’s words from earlier that day about the enormous appetite of her brothers, Drusilla smiled at the large eyes of Henry and Elam taking in all of the delicious bowls and platters just waiting for them to dive in. Everyone took their places. This time, Drusilla was relieved to be seated next to her husband who sat to the left of her father.

  Everyone bowed their heads to pray before the meal. Then, rather than beginning to pass the dishes, everyone just sat there and stared at Amos. Caleb had reached for a bowl and almost started to serve himself when Drusilla nudged him and glanced at her father. Immediately, Caleb set down the bowl and, respectfully, he turned his attention toward Amos.

  “Now we all know the importance of Christmas. God gave us his only begotten Son and, it’s at this time of year that we celebrate his birth. The three kings came from quite a distance to bring him gifts, three gifts to be exact. Vell, I only have one present to give out right now,” Amos said before the meal began. “And it’s to Drusilla and Caleb, since they won’t be joining us on Christmas Day.”

  Drusilla glanced at Caleb. She was far too old for Christmas gifts from her parents.