by A. M. Brooks
“Camilla.” I raise my hands slowly, my voice calm despite the tremor in my legs. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean for it to happen that way. I had to protect them. People were dying.”
“You should have stayed out of it you stupid, stupid bitch,” she taunts. “I’m going to have so much fun though.”
“What do you mean?” I ask, trying to keep her talking even if she is bat shit crazy right now.
“I’m going to have so much fun rearranging your pretty face and breaking every bone in your whorish body. Bad girls get punished, Nora. You have to pay for lying. You’ll pay for your sins. Then they will.” She smiles while dragging her fingernail against the tiled wall.
I grit my teeth, not moving as she gets closer. “Leave them out of this.”
Her head tosses back laughing. “The Kings’ days are numbered. How will Darrian feel when he realizes he failed to protect his precious queen? I can’t wait to see his face when he sees you. Broken, bleeding, not able to breathe. I’ll watch as we take everything from him just like he did to us.”
“Stop,” I tell her, shaking my head. “Are you really this insane? Did you forget your meds this morning?”
The smile falls from her mouth and she goes deadly still a few inches from me.
“Kill her.” Two words and the room erupts in chaos. The four girls from the back storm toward me.
The first comes at me strong and I’m able to uppercut her to the nose and she falls back bleeding. The Muscle though… is fast. Her arms snake around my waist, lifting me off my feet. I kick and jab to get free, tossing us both backward into the garbage can. My foot connects with the chest of another who was charging us. The wind is knocked out of me when Muscle fights to pin my back to the wall. One of the ringers, I’m positive at this point she is not a high school student, and I’d really like to know how she made it through the doors, grabs a fistful of my hair and tugs my head forward before backhanding me across the face. My cheek stings and the back of my head connects with the wall. White dots dance across my vision and I have to shake my head to clear them.
I get away, ducking to the floor and land a kick to Hair Puller’s leg before Muscle is grabbing me again and trying to force me to the ground. Nothing about this is going to end well. My side hurts, my hand is bleeding, and my head is already throbbing. Darrian, my mind pleads even while knowing he isn’t here to save me. I ruined it all. My body thrashes to get out of Muscle’s grip, I swing and kick. I’m not above clawing at this point and I feel my nails scrape along someone’s skin. I get some satisfaction in that person’s cry of surprise.
“FUCKING WHORE!” I hear Camilla’s voice yell.
Spitting blood from my mouth, I grin at her. The demons in her eyes flash before a fist connects with the side of my head. Sharp pain radiates my skull. Blackness reaches for me. When my body finally hits the tiled floor, I welcome the numbness waiting for me.
Powerless, defenseless, unprotected. I failed Nora today in the worst way. Despite her doctor’s reassurance that the majority of her wounds were superficial, sans the slight bruising to her right side, nothing eased the tightness in my chest. This was a brand new low point in our already rocky relationship. I caused this. My addiction set us on this path, and she was always the one absorbing the pain from the fallout. I feel Ethan’s hand fall on my shoulder trying to comfort me or hold me together. I’m not sure what was going on right now. I’m nothing but a low life. I can barely contain myself, would give anything to reduce the discomfort racking my body while the most perfect girl in the world is resting in a hospital bed down the hall. It’s probably a good thing her dad won’t let me in. I don’t deserve to breathe her air, let alone love her the way I do.
“She’s going to be okay, man,” Ethan says again. He sounds confident. I want to believe, but until I see her for myself, I won’t let myself be hopeful. “And you,” he says to his twin who is leaning against the opposite wall. “You need to snap out of it too. We knew this was a possibility. We couldn’t be everywhere she was all the time no matter how much we planned.”
“I should have followed,” Elijah responds, his voice cracking. . My head snaps up, taking in my cousin who is usually the rock in these situations. He looks as bad as I feel.
“You got there as soon as you could,” I tell him, thanking God, the heavens, divine intervention, karma, fate, whatever it was that intervened for him to get to that bathroom when he did. “Nora’s always been independent. She does what she wants. You couldn’t have stopped her if she made up her mind to go,” I comfort him. Even as I say it, the words feel hollow in my mouth because I can’t make myself believe them. He nods but doesn’t say anything else.
“Nora’s a badass, okay. Both of you need to get over it. She took on the psycho squad by herself. You should be proud of her and her battle wounds,” Ethan announces.
My mouth twitches in a small grin. My girl had given as good as she was getting and more. Her self-defense and kickboxing classes were probably one of the best decisions she ever made.
“You didn’t see that bathroom,” Elijah mutters quietly, shaking his head. I close my eyes, trying to block out the mental images my brain is creating in an attempt to torture me.
Ethan blows out his breath. “She is going to be okay,” he declares again. I stay silent. Ethan has always been able to see the good in any bad situation while Elijah and I tend to fall into the darkness and self-loathing.
“Eli!” Tara yells his name before launching herself into his arms. He pulls her body into his holding her like a lifeline. My gaze slides to Ethan who is already watching them in fascination. His mouth is open in shock. No one calls Elijah anything besides his given name. Ethan has tried many times to give his brother a nickname which usually ended with him having a black eye or being pinned to the ground. And public affection…affection in general, is rare for him. She says something else, but it’s muffled with her mouth against his neck. Whatever it was must have contained the key to unleashing him from the dark cell he was keeping himself in. Elijah visibly relaxes and something close to relief washes over his face.
The fuck? Ethan mouths at me. I lift my shoulders in response just as confused as he is.
“Darrian.” My head swings down the hallway to who called my name. Mark Sutton looks like he’s aged twenty years in the past five hours. His suit pants were wrinkled and the sharp tie he usually wore was gone. I push away from the wall and start to walk in his direction. Each squeaky step on the overly sanitized floor is a reminder in my soul of the blame I’m shouldering.
“She wants to see you,” he tells me when I reach him. Mark’s eyes are glossy and red-rimmed. Up close I can tell his usually styled hair is ruffled like he’s run his hands through it multiple times.
I start to say how sorry I am and choke on my own words. Clearing my throat, all I can croak out is a “Yes, sir.”
He peeks his head back into her room. “I’m going to go call Jodi,” he tells her. I can’t hear her response though with the roaring of nerves in my ears.
“Go ahead,” he says while stepping around me.
I watch him walk back to where the waiting room area is. He doesn’t turn around, doesn’t offer encouragement. He probably hates me right now and I wouldn’t blame him. I take a deep breath and steel my insides for what I’m about to walk into. If she asked me to leave her alone, could I? After all of this, if she wants to walk away, I’d have to let her this time. That thought terrifies me more than anything else.
“Hi,” she says when I step into her room. Her voice is hoarse, and she looks exhausted sitting there propped against the pillows.
“Hey baby,” I answer while moving closer to her side. My voice catches in my throat so instead of saying all the shit on my mind, I choose instead to take her hand in mine and sit on the edge of the bed. Some of the tension lessens when I realize she isn’t pushing me away.
“Are you okay?” she asks quietly, and I know what she really means.
“I
think those are my words,” I joke instead to avoid. Her eyes narrow. She can always see through my bullshit.
“Darr.”
“Nora.” Her name is a plea.
“I want to go home,” she says softly. I freeze. “I want you to take me home and stay with me.” Our eyes connect. Determination is all I see in her clear hazels.
“I don’t think your dad is going to be okay with this,” I remind her of our obstacles.
“He said you need to stay in the guest room but that you could stay all weekend.” She shrugs, looking unapologetic.
A small chuckle leaves my mouth. “You planned this?” She smiles for a second before her face falls and her focus drops to the blanket in front of her.
“I told him everything,” she says. She sounds guilty when she has no reason to be. I was the one who insisted on letting as few people as possible know for their own safety.
“That’s fine,” I say, trying to sound reassuring. She has nothing to be sorry for in this situation. “This is all on me,” I tell her, squeezing her hand.
Her head snaps up. “This is not your fault, Darrian. None of us are to blame. Roman, Cody, Zero-Thirteen, Camilla…this is on them and the choices they made. I chose to protect you that day. I chose to try and prevent more teenagers from dying. All you’ve been trying to do since I’ve been back is protect me from the fallout of the decision I made. You didn’t hurt me. Camilla did. My dad knows this. He’s not completely blind. He knows you’ve been over, he just didn’t understand why. I think he feels bad he didn’t know how unsafe it was for me to be here.”
“Are you leaving?” I ask, wincing at the desperation in my voice. This sucks. Everything is too emotional right now, my insides are rioting.
“No,” she laughs. “I’m not. I want to be with you. That was what I had been trying to text you back. Why I left class…” Her voice trails off.
Be with me.
Why she left class.
Before she was ambushed.
My hand tightens around hers to keep her in the moment instead of back in that bathroom. “When can you leave?” I’m in. All in. Forever in for this girl. She has no idea what she’s setting herself up for. Fuck anyone who tries to tell us we’re horrible for each other or that I should give her space.
“As soon as my dad gets back. He’s signing the discharge papers.” A telling smirk pulls on her full lips. She knew I wouldn’t turn her down.
“Well played, Sutton,” I acknowledge.
“For the record, my first answer was no.” Mr. Sutton’s voice fills the room. He looks less serious than he did when he left, and there is a small shift in his lips like he’s holding back his own smile. It also could have something to do with the crowd behind him. Ethan, Elijah, Lily, Shea, and Olivia all slide into the room.
“Sleepover at Sutton’s!” Ethan yells, officially kicking the rest of the awkward tension out of the room. I groan when I realize it won’t be just us but everyone.
“That wasn’t part of the plan.” Nora winks at me and shrugs her shoulders. I’ll kill Ethan later.
An hour later, Nora was discharged, and we all pulled into her driveway to spend the weekend. It took some convincing, but Mark let me take her in my Jeep. She held her hand in mine during the whole drive and I didn’t mind. Since she drove with me, Mark decided to go and get food for everyone. For having his daughter seriously banged up, finding out it was a gang-related attack, and that she was giving me another chance, Mr. Sutton had a lot to process and now he was entertaining seven teenagers for the weekend. He was either crazy or just willing to do anything to keep the smile on Nora’s face.
“Hang on,” I tell her, sliding out of my seat and rounding the front to her door. Without hesitating, I scoop her up and jog to the front door.
“I’m not broken.” She laughs while gripping my shoulders. Not going to lie, it’s the greatest feeling to have her hands on me. I suck in a breath, mentally yelling at myself to get a grip.
“You should take it easy,” I remind her. Part of her negotiation for having me stay the weekend was that she rest and follow all her doctor recommendations.
“Yeah, yeah,” she responds and grins when I scowl at her.
“Come on, lovebirds,” Lily calls to us from the door. I set Nora down gently and use her key ring to let everyone in.
“I call a room!” Ethan hollers once he’s inside.
“You get the couch,” I tell him. His excitement dwindles a little.
“Don’t worry, we can spoon.” Elijah swings his arm out, knocking into Ethan’s gut.
“That incestuous and mildly exciting to think about,” Shea deadpans from across the room. She and Olivia are tossing their stuff into the other spare room.
“I’d love to see the reading material on your Kindle library. Lil’ Shea.” Ethan laughs from the couch and dips his eyebrows suggestively.
“Lil’ Shea?” she questions. Her dark brow raised.
“Yeah you know because you’re miniature sized.” Ethan holds his hand off the ground indicating a five-foot-two height. Shea rolls her eyes, clearly not put off by the nickname.
“You are shorter though,” Olivia tells her.
“Where are you sleeping, Lily?” Elijah asks not so randomly. Ethan instantly stills, waiting to hear her answer while trying to act like he isn’t. Both Ethan and Lily go out of their way to ignore each other. Apparently, the conversation we had two months ago didn’t change his mind about their relationship. He still holds her at an arm’s length while being crazy about her.
“With me!” Nora says, sticking her tongue out. Lily gives her a thankful smile. I walk over to her and swing her body back up against my chest to carry her up to her room.
“Serious, I’m fine, you’re insane,” she tells me.
“Just let me.” Any excuse to touch her is fair game now that there are extra guests this weekend. Bending my neck, I bring my mouth to her ear and feel her freeze. “When you have time, can you check in with Elijah?” I ask. Her eyes feel with tears, but she nods. She knows he blames himself when he shouldn’t. In the end, he was the one to find her before any actual damage could have been done.
“I promise,” she replies. I set her on her feet in her room and she hobbles her way over to the bed. Lily helps her get on, then starts throwing pillows onto the ground.
“What if we make a huge lounge area in the living room?” Lily suddenly stops, “Then we can all hang out there and watch movies, play some games. It would be less stair time for you.”
“Love it!” Nora agrees. I smile because she does. I can’t help it and I wonder again where all these sappy feelings come from. Nora is the only one who had ever made me think or act this way.
“I’ll bring down the blankets and pillows and get the guys to throw another mattress between the couches,” I plan out loud. The very girly screaming and excitement lets me know I made the right choice.
The weekend flies by exactly like Friday night. Everyone stuck to the lounge area. Mr. Sutton and Jodi took turns bringing or making food. A couple times they joined us which made Nora happy. During those times, Mr. Sutton would stare me down like he was waiting for me to mess up or something to go wrong. In the past, I would have thrown in the towel. No girl had ever been worth it. Nora was, so I stayed. Thanks to Lily’s wonderful idea, we all ended up sleeping in the living room as well. Every night I watched my girl fall asleep and in the morning, she would be burrowed into my side.
I was pissed it was Monday. She had the option to miss today, but in true Nora fashion, she refused to miss. “I have a test,” she told her dad, almost outraged he would suggest she stay home. No, it was time to go back to the real world and to find a way to discuss the sensitive topic about the Snowball. Also known as: One of the biggest fuck-ups of my life.
“What are you doing after school today?” I ask, interrupting her Spanish test practice. Instead of being annoyed, she looks almost embarrassed when she says, “I thought I would be with you.”
Her cheeks turn a delicious pink and it’s the fuckin’ cutest thing I’ve ever seen.
“Good,” I tell her while bringing her hand to my mouth and skimming a kiss on the inside of her wrist. Her eyes glaze over, her lips part, and small goosebumps chase down her arm. I want to follow them with my tongue before setting her on fire. I love the effect I have on her. I shift in my seat, wondering if she can tell what she is doing to me. It’s been months since I’ve had her. There is nothing more I want than to finally put everything behind us for good then bending her over and sink in deep right where I’m meant to be. She scrambles out when I drop her off at the front of the building with just a wave. I smirk and shake my head. It’s going to be a long day until I can get to the gym.
Hours later and a few miles run in, I pick Nora up out front, and drive us to the only place I can think of to have an honest conversation. It’s January and the yacht is still docked, it’s just closed up.
“I love this place,” she sighs when we pull into an empty parking place and trudge through the sand to the docks. I take her hand, pulling her with me.
“Hurry,” I say, helping her climb over the edge. “Grab this.” I hand her up a blanket. She takes it and waits for me. I pull her quickly inside the tarped off area and spin the dial on the lock. When it gives way, we rush into the cabin.
“Brrr.” She laughs, rubbing her hands together.
“Here.” I pull her down to the lounger and throw the blanket over us. It’s eerily quiet except for the waves lapping at the hull, and the small thud every time we nudge the dock.