Love Hard (Anything But Mine Book 2)

by Barbara Justice

  The barn at the old farmhouse was lit with strands of thousands of tiny white lights, and four antler chandeliers hung from the ceiling. The round tables were covered with pale mint green tablecloths, and sprays of tiny daisies and greenery adorned the center of each table.

  A dance floor was set up in the middle of the barn, and a band played a mix of country, classic rock and Motown hits. When it came time for their first dance, Sky led Meg to the center of the barn, as the band covered Tim McGraw and Faith Hill’s “It’s Your Love”.

  Butterflies fluttered in Meg’s stomach when Sky sang along with the band while he led her around the dance floor. She tried to keep her focus on her husband, but couldn’t help noticing both her father and Trey wipe away tears.

  After their dance, they began to circulate among the guests with their photographer in tow. Meg introduced Sky to her childhood friends, all of whom wanted a photo with them. “Sort of like an upscale meet and greet,” Sky joked.

  “I’m sorry about that. I know that’s not what you wanted.”

  “It’s okay, darlin’. These are your friends and family, and they’re excited for you, and to meet me. I don’t mind one bit. But I’m glad we checked everyone’s cell phones and cameras, so we have control over the photos that get out there.”

  Meg smiled at him. “Me too.” She watched as the meal was being served, and tugged on Sky’s sleeve. “I barely ate today, so I’m starving. Let’s eat before we finish greeting everyone.”

  Although a table for two was set up for the bride and groom, Sky and Meg had also requested that two places be set for them at the tables where their respective immediate families were seated. They ate half their meal with the Johnson family, before joining the LaBella-Novak family for the rest of their meal.

  “I can’t believe I never asked you this,” Gina said, when they sat down with Meg’s family. “Where are you going on your honeymoon?”

  Sky and Meg exchanged glances, and burst out laughing. “Hawaii,” they answered in unison.

  Gina was puzzled. “What’s so funny about Hawaii?”

  Meg’s cheeks turned a deep shade of red. “Nothing. Nothing, really.”

  “It’s a bit of an inside joke,” Sky chimed in. “Neither of us has ever been there before, and we’ve both always wanted to go to a real luau.”

  CHAPTER FORTY

  The honeymoon was magical. Sky and Meg spent their days sightseeing and biking, when they weren’t lounging on the beach or surfing the waters of the Pacific. They hiked the Na Pali coast, learned to surf, and went to luaus at night. It was a perfect two weeks, except for one thing: Meg forgot to pack her birth control pills.

  “Crap!” She rooted through her suitcase, then her tote bag, before collapsing on the bed in the private villa after their arrival in Hawaii. “I can’t believe I forgot them.”

  “What’s the big deal?” Sky snuggled up next to her, and took her in his arms. “We’re married, and we’re planning on having kids. What’s the worst that could happen?”

  “Are you kidding me? We’re nowhere near ready to have kids. I want to enjoy being married first. We’ll just have to go to the store and get some protection for you.”

  Sky’s face fell. “No way. I’m not going back to wearing a condom. We’ve already made love a few times since you realized you forgot the pills. And, besides, remember what you told me last year in Vegas.”

  She furrowed her brows. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

  “You told me it doesn’t always happen the first time, and that it’s not always easy to get pregnant.”

  “Yeah, I know I said that, but…” Her voice trailed off while she searched Sky’s eyes.

  He leaned in and brushed his lips against hers. “I’ll make you a deal, baby. We’ll take our chances on this trip, and if you’re not pregnant at the end of the month, then you’ll re-start your birth control, and it can be up to you to decide when we try for a family.” His lips blazed a trail to her earlobe, then down her neck.

  “You know I can’t resist you.” Her voice was strained and breathless, as Sky’s tongue reached her breasts, sending waves of pleasure crashing through her body.

  “I was counting on that,” he said with a smile. “So, do we have a deal?”

  She sighed, and rolled her eyes. “Yes. Deal.”

  When they returned to Nashville, Meg counted down the days until she could take a home pregnancy test. While she had no symptoms, her monthly cycle had not started either.

  Meg woke up with the sunrise on the morning she could take the test. I’ve never been late. Ever. This doesn’t bode well.

  She peeled the covers off of her body, being careful not to wake Sky. Her knees felt weak, her heart raced, and her hands shook as she closed the door to the bathroom and turned on the light. She sat down on the toilet, relieved herself, and awaited her fate.

  Three minutes later, Meg summoned the courage to look at the test stick, and her heart sank when she saw the plus sign. Positive. Crap.

  Tears streamed down her face, and she began to sob. She had no idea how long she was crying on the toilet when Sky opened the bathroom door.

  “What’s wrong, baby?”

  She held the test up. “This.”

  He examined the test stick. “This means you’re pregnant?”

  She nodded her head as she began to sob all over again. “I’m so sorry.” She ran past him and flung herself onto the bed.

  Sky followed her back into the bedroom. “Baby, why are you sorry? We’re having a baby. We should be happy. Right?”

  Meg didn’t answer him, and continued to cry into her pillow. Her tears subsided and she calmed down when she felt Sky rub her back. She took a deep breath, and summoned the courage to turn over to face him. “I’m so afraid, Sky.”

  “Of what?”

  She swallowed hard. “I’m afraid that I’ll die, like my mother did, and that I’ll leave you to raise our child by yourself.”

  He brushed the hair out of her eyes. “That’s not going to happen. We’re going to have lots of babies, raise them, and teach them right from wrong. We’re going to grow old together.”

  She stared into his deep blue eyes. I’m afraid of something else too. I’m afraid having a baby will change our relationship. What if we’re never the same again?

  By the time the Johnson Bishop Band resumed their tour the following weekend, Meg had full-blown pregnancy symptoms.

  “Thank God we have our own bus,” she said, as she exited the bathroom after another bout of morning sickness. “We’d never be able to keep it a secret if we were still traveling with the rest of the band.”

  “Yeah.” Sky grimaced as he handed her a sleeve of dry crackers and a bottle of water. “I’m worried that you can’t keep anything down. That can’t be good for you or the baby.”

  She shrugged. “It’s normal.”

  Sky shook his head. “You sure you want to go on a ride today?”

  “Absolutely. I’ve never been to South Dakota, and I can’t wait to see the sights.”

  “All right,” he said. “Let’s go.”

  They strapped on their helmets and climbed onto Sky’s motorcycle. They rode through Sioux Falls, before turning towards Falls Park to see its namesake falls of the Big Sioux River.

  “It’s beautiful,” Meg said, as they walked hand in hand along a paved path within the park. “I love traveling with you, and seeing the country together. I love our life.”

  “I love it too, baby,” Sky replied, as he brought her hand to his lips for a soft kiss.

  Meg was quiet the rest of the day. She tried to focus on the beautiful surroundings, and on enjoying the time with her husband, but nagging fear and doubt kept invading her thoughts. I don’t want our life to change. But it’s going to when the baby is born.

  When they returned to the venue, they found the rest of the band members grilling hamburgers and hot dogs to celebrate Beau’s birthday. Everyone was gathered underneath a tent, eating
and drinking beer.

  Jack handed Sky and Meg beers as they entered the tent, but Meg declined and grabbed a bottle of water instead.

  Meg looked around. “Where’s Becky?”

  “She’s back in our bus,” Jack said. “She’s a little under the weather.”

  “Oh, no,” Meg said. “Should I go check on her?”

  “No…no, don’t do that. She’s resting. I’m sure she’ll feel all right later on.”

  “Okay. I’ll just text her instead.”

  As she was standing underneath the tent, the smell of the meat cooking on the grill overwhelmed Meg. She felt her stomach begin to roll, and waves of nausea overtook her.

  “I’ve got to get out of here. The smells in this tent are making me sick,” she whispered to Sky, before making a beeline for their bus.

  Jack watched as she ran away, before asking Sky, “Everything okay with Meg?”

  He ran his hands through his hair. “Yeah. She’s also under the weather a bit. It’s a stomach thing.”

  Jack’s eyes grew wide, and he began to laugh. “Becky was here earlier, and she had the same reaction – she left because she couldn’t take the smell of meat cooking. Do you think she and Meg share a secret?”

  “It depends. Are you and Becky…um…expecting?”

  “A little bundle of joy should be here in February. What about you and Meg?”

  “We’re looking at February too.”

  Jack let out a hoot, and patted Sky on the back. “Ever since we were kids, we’ve done everything together. Looks like we can add fatherhood to the list, buddy.”

  CHAPTER FORTY-ONE

  “Thanks for helping me set up the nursery,” Meg said to Fiona as she rubbed her swollen belly on a bitterly cold day in early February. “There’s so much to do, and we’re running out of time.”

  Meg decided on a cowboy theme for the nursery. A rocking horse with a western saddle was in the corner of the room, and the wall above the changing table was adorned with a rope lasso encircling wooden letters spelling out the baby’s name. A small hand-knit American flag blanket, a gift from Jennifer, hung on the rail of the dark brown wooden crib.

  Fiona smiled at Meg while folding the freshly-laundered baby clothes. “I’m always happy to help. With the baby coming any day, Sky seems a little overwhelmed.”

  “Yeah, he is. I’m glad that he and Trey went out for a hike. They can have some male bonding time, while we ‘nest’.”

  Since Sky and Meg’s wedding, Trey and Fiona had become a steady item. Trey flew to Nashville nearly every weekend to spend time with Fiona, and when he was unable to fly up, he flew Fiona down to Dallas.

  While Meg was hanging some horseshoes on the wall, she felt the baby kick. “Fiona, come here and feel the baby. He’s really active today.”

  Fiona placed her hand on Meg’s stomach, and her eyes welled up when she was able to feel him moving. “That’s amazing,” she said, wiping away a tear.

  “Are you okay?”

  “I’m fine,” Fiona sniffed. “It’s just that I’m so happy for you and Sky. After I lost my son, I thought I’d never have the chance to have a grandchild. But with you and Sky in my life, well, you’ve given me that chance, and I couldn’t be happier, or more grateful.”

  Meg hugged Fiona. “Aww…Sky and I feel the same way. You’re the only grandmother our son will have.” She pointed to the wall with the baby’s name. “What do you think?”

  “I love it. And I’ve kept your secret from Trey. I can’t wait to see his reaction.”

  “Me too. He’s going to be thrilled when we tell him we’re having a boy.”

  The sound of a door slamming announced the men had returned from their hike. Meg waddled out to the living room to greet them. “How was your afternoon?”

  “Cold,” Trey answered, rubbing his hands together. “Is Fiona still here?”

  “Yes, she’s in the nursery. She’ll be out in a minute. Can I get you guys something warm to drink?”

  “Tea with honey would be great,” Sky said.

  “Make that two,” Trey added.

  Fiona joined them in the living room, carrying a plate of sugar cookies she baked earlier in the day. “Just don’t eat too many,” she chided, as Trey reached for a cookie. “Meg made a chicken pot pie casserole for later, and you want to leave room for it.”

  “Women,” Trey said, looking at Sky. “Always telling us what to do.”

  Sky chuckled. “Yeah, well, Meg and I have some news for you, dad.” Sky took Meg by the hand, and continued, “We’re finally going to outnumber them. You know how we were going to wait to learn the gender of the baby?”

  “I remember.”

  “Well, we accidentally found out last week during a sonogram. We’re having a boy.”

  Trey jumped off the sofa, and hugged both Sky and Meg. “A boy? Really? Son, that’s great news.”

  “He’ll be William Skyler Johnson the fifth,” Sky said, beaming.

  Trey’s voice boomed throughout the living room. “The fifth – I love it! What are you going to call him?”

  Meg spoke up. “Sky wanted to call him Will, but I pointed out that the Johnson family is running out of unique nicknames for William. If our son has a son, he’d be the sixth, and six in Latin is ‘sex’. We can’t have our future grandson named that,” she said with a smile. “So, since he’s going to be the fifth, we thought we’d call him Quint.”

  “Quint Johnson. It’s a good, strong-sounding name. You’re always thinking, Meg. I like it,” Trey said.

  Meg took Trey by the arm. “Come see the nursery. Fiona and I have been working on it all day.”

  A week later, Meg’s water broke. Sky rushed her to the hospital, where she suffered through ten hours of labor before the baby was ready to arrive.

  “Come on, darlin’. You can do it. Remember your breathing exercises.” Sky held Meg’s hand as the doctor instructed her to push. “You’re my brave girl.”

  “There’s got to be a better way,” Meg groaned, before letting out a loud, guttural scream. “Argh…”

  “Next time don’t refuse the epidural,” Patti, the nurse on duty and one of Meg’s college classmates, said.

  “Argh…not going to be a next time.”

  “Oh yes there is,” Sky said with a grin. “We’re going to have lots of babies.”

  Meg glared at him. “This is not the time to have this conversation, Sky,” she said through gritted teeth.

  After a few more pushes, Meg gave birth to a nine pound baby boy. When the baby was handed to her, tears streamed down her face. She looked down, and smiled. “He’s beautiful.” She turned to her husband, and added, “And he looks just like you. He even has your blue eyes.”

  Sky leaned over and kissed the top of her head. “You were so brave during labor. I know what was going through your mind, and I want you to know that I’m proud of you.”

  He handed his phone to one of the nurses, and asked that she take some photos of them. “Baby makes three,” he joked, as the nurse snapped the photos.

  Meg gazed at the baby in her arms while Sky made phone calls to their family members. I can’t believe we made a baby together, she thought while listening to Sky tell his father that Quint was born. She kissed her son, and wondered what it had been like for her mother to hold her just after she was born. Did you know that you were about to die? Did you feel sick, mom? Were you in pain?

  Dark thoughts invaded her mind. I can’t imagine what my father was going through, either. It should have been one of the happiest days of his life, but it turned out to be the worst. And I caused it. I don’t deserve to be a mother. I don’t deserve happiness.

  Sky whipped around when he heard Meg crying. “I’ve gotta go, dad. See you later.” He rushed to his wife’s side. “What’s wrong?”

  “Take the baby from me. Take him. Now!”

  The baby began to cry as Sky scooped him up in his arms. “What’s wrong? Should I call the doctor?”

  Meg doubled
over, as her sobs filled the room. “No. I don’t need anyone. I don’t deserve this. I killed my mother.”

  Sky sat down the edge of the bed, and pulled her in for a hug with one arm, while holding Quint with the other arm. “Shh…,” he said, stroking her hair. “It’s okay, baby.”

  She sniffed, and wiped her eyes. “It’s not okay. It’s not…”

  He took a deep breath. “Look,” he said, holding Quint out for Meg to take into her arms. “Look what we did. We made this life. The two of us made this beautiful baby. Even if you don’t feel you deserve him, he’s ours. And he needs to have both of us to be the best parents we can be. Our love made him, and he’s perfect. It’s a fresh start, for both of us.”

  Sky groaned as he turned over and looked at his phone. “Jesus, its two o’clock in the morning. Is he ever going to sleep?”

  “I’m doing the best I can,” Meg replied. “I’ll take him into the nursery.” She rolled out of bed, pulled her robe tightly around her, and picked the baby up from the bassinet. “Sorry he disturbed you.”

  “Meg…,” he called out, but was answered with a slamming door.

  In the two months since they brought Quint home from the hospital, their lives had been turned upside down. Meg breastfed and rocked him until he fell asleep, but he cried the minute he was placed in his bassinet. She tried to get him to sleep before Sky came to bed each night, but when he entered their bedroom, the baby often woke up and began crying again.

  Sky could hear the crying through the baby monitor, and Meg’s attempts at trying to soothe Quint. He pulled a pillow over his head, but it did little to muffle the sound of the baby’s cries. He tossed and turned for half an hour, before he shut the baby monitor off.

  The next morning, he woke up and found himself alone in bed. It wasn’t the first time he had woken alone since the baby was born, but this time he felt particularly abandoned as he wracked his brain. I can’t even remember the last time I kissed my wife. What the hell has happened to us?

  He pulled on a tee shirt and a pair of sweatpants, and shuffled into the kitchen. He started the coffeemaker, before wandering towards the nursery. Opening the door a crack, he peered in, finding Quint asleep in his crib, and Meg passed out on the floor.