Only Her

by Allie Everhart

  “I need a room for tonight,” he says.

  “You don’t have a reservation?”

  “No. What do you have available?”

  She clicks on her computer, glancing up at me, then back at her screen. “The only room I have open tonight is our suite. It has a master bedroom with a separate guest room and a large living room with a bar.”

  “Excellent. I’ll take it.” He reaches in his suit jacket for his wallet.

  “Sir, it’s $1500 a night,” she says cautiously.

  “That’s fine.” He gives her his information and hands her his credit card.

  She swipes his card, then hands it back to him along with the room key. “The suite is on the top floor. You’ll need to use your key to access the floor. Your luggage is already being brought up to your room. Enjoy your stay, Mr. Kensington.” She smiles again, flirtatiously this time.

  It makes me wonder how many women Pearce has been with since I left. Did he cheat on Katherine? It wasn’t a real marriage so maybe he did. Even if he didn’t, he’s been divorced for five years. He could’ve been with a lot of women in those five years.

  “Shall we go?” Pearce puts his arm around my waist and leads me away from the desk and to the elevator.

  I don’t know if he did it on purpose, but his hand placement is causing heat to build inside me. His hand remains there as we go in the elevator. He slides his room card in the slot and pushes the button for the top floor.

  “Is something wrong?” he asks as the elevator moves. His arm is still around me and he has that hint of a smile again.

  “Nothing’s wrong. Why do you ask?”

  “You seem tense, but perhaps I’m imagining it.”

  He’s right. My body tensed up when he touched me, not because I don’t like it, but because I like it too much. Every time he touches me, heat surges inside me. Desire. Want.

  Pearce has always had that effect on me. Even after we were married for years, his touch still affected me this way. I wasn’t sure if I’d still feel that way when I saw him again, but I do. I definitely do. My desire for him is intense.

  I need to focus on other things. We’re not here to do that. We need to talk. We’re supposed to spend tonight talking. Just talking.

  The elevator opens to a hallway that has just one door. The suite must take up the entire floor.

  Pearce unlocks the door and holds it open for me. “After you,” he says.

  I step inside the suite and enter the living room. The two bedrooms are off to the left. The living room has a dark brown leather couch that faces a stone fireplace. On each side of the fireplace are expansive windows that look out at the ocean. My apartment in Italy had magnificent views, but this is so much better. Because this is home. Where my family is.

  “It’s a nice view.” Pearce comes up behind me, placing his hands on my shoulders.

  “Yes. It’s gorgeous.” Standing this close to him, I smell his cologne again. It’s excellent cologne.

  “Can I get you something to drink?” he asks.

  I glance over and see the bar off to the side. “Maybe later.” I turn around and his hands drop from my shoulders, but I want them back. I already miss his touch. “I think I’ll take a quick tour of the room first.”

  “They brought the luggage up.” He walks over to where it’s sitting and picks up my suitcase. “Where would you like it?”

  I feel like it’s a trick question. Like he’s asking if I want to sleep with him. I do want to sleep with him, but I think it’s too soon.

  “The guest room is fine.”

  “The master bedroom is yours. I’ll take the guest room.” He brings my suitcase into the oversized room with the king-size bed.

  I follow him. “Pearce, no. You should take this one. You paid for the room.”

  “Rachel, stop talking about the cost. You’re my wife and—” He stops and clears his throat. “The room is yours.”

  He still considers me his wife. And I still consider him my husband. So why are we acting so formal with each other? Is it because we’ve been apart for so long? We’re not sure how to act?

  “Thank you.” I go up and hug him.

  “Don’t thank me.” He hugs me back. “What’s mine is yours. It always has been and always will be. Anything you need, just ask and I will get it for you.”

  “I already have everything I need.” I hope he knows I wasn’t just referring to Garret when I said that, but to him too. The two of them are all I need.

  His cell phone rings and I step back so he can answer it.

  “It’s Garret,” he says, then talks into the phone. “Hello, Garret….yes, we found it…they had a room available…I’ll call you tomorrow.” He ends the call and his phone rings again. “It’s the office.” He ignores the call and puts his phone away.

  I smile at him. “So you’re the CEO?”

  “Yes. I have been for years. Ever since….well, it’s been a long time.”

  “Do you like it?”

  “I’m not particularly fond of the chemical industry and manufacturing, but as for running a corporation, yes. I find it challenging, yet also rewarding.”

  “That’s good.” I smile a little. “My job wasn’t quite as challenging.”

  “You said you worked at a restaurant?”

  “Yes. I didn’t have many options. When I first arrived in Italy, I moved into a studio apartment above the restaurant and my landlady, Celia, who also owns the restaurant, offered me a job there. Celia was very good to me. She treated me like a daughter. She helped me get out of Italy and gave me some money. I need to write her and tell her I made it. And pay her back the money.”

  “Tell me where to send it and I’ll have it sent to her right away.”

  I nod in agreement. “I also taught English to children.”

  He smiles. “Did you enjoy that?”

  “I did. Very much. The children were all very sweet but…” I take a breath, trying to fight back tears. “They reminded me of Garret.” A tear trickles down my cheek.

  Pearce runs his hand down my arm. “Rachel.”

  I squeeze my eyes shut, then open them again. “I need you to tell me, Pearce. I need you to tell me about Garret and everything I missed when I was gone. Birthdays. School events. Baseball games. Football games. His swim meets.” I wipe my eyes and smile. “He was always so into sports, even as a toddler.”

  “Yes,” Pearce says quietly. “That’s never changed.”

  “I want to hear every detail about his life. Everything that I missed. Can you do that for me?”

  “Of course.” He glances down as he says it. He seems uncomfortable.

  “Pearce, is something wrong?”

  He looks up again. “No. Sorry. I was just thinking about Garret. There’s so much to tell you I’m not sure where to start.”

  “You don’t need to tell me right now. In fact, I don’t think I’m quite ready to hear it.”

  He nods. “We’ll do it later. There’s no rush. We have plenty of time.”

  I glance down at my suitcase. “Well, I think I’ll unpack my clothes.”

  He points to the suitcase. “Is that all you have?”

  “Yes. Why?”

  “Did you leave the rest in Italy?”

  “No. That’s everything.”

  Now he’s the one who looks like he’s fighting back tears. He draws me into his arms. “Rachel, I’m so sorry. This never should’ve happened. I wish I could go back in time and change it all. I have so many regrets. So much guilt.”

  I pull back enough to look at him. “Guilt over what?”

  “Everything. Not knowing this was being planned. Trusting that my father wouldn’t hurt you. Making you go to that fundraiser. Making you stay behind to attend Wingate’s speech. Encouraging you to get on that plane.”

  “Pearce, don’t. Don’t feel guilty about any of that. You weren’t aware of what was going on. You couldn’t have stopped it. And now it’s over. It’s time to move on.”

&n
bsp; His phone rings again and he checks it. “It’s the office. I’ll just turn my phone off. I shouldn’t be answering calls right now.”

  “Go ahead and deal with work. It’ll give me time to unpack.”

  “All right.” He pauses, his eyes on mine. He lifts his hand up, smoothing my hair. “I still can’t believe you’re here.”

  I smile at him. “I can’t either.”

  He pauses again, his eyes lingering on my face, then he says, “Come out when you’re done. I just need to make a few phone calls. It shouldn’t take long.”

  “Okay.”

  He walks out of the room and I panic for a moment. After being apart from him for so long, I want him beside me, right next to me, where I can see him, and touch him, and make sure he’s really there. But I can’t be that way. I can’t be with him every second of every day. He has other people in his life now. People who depend on him, like his daughter.

  I close the door and open my suitcase and hang up some of my clothes. I’m so used to not having much that Pearce’s reaction surprised me. He looked so sad when I told him this suitcase holds everything I own. When we were married, I had way more than I needed, but now I’m used to having almost nothing. And the past fifteen years, that never bothered me. I never even gave it a thought. I didn’t miss my designer dresses or my expensive car or my diamond jewelry. I didn’t care if I never had those things again. I only wanted my family back. That’s all that mattered. It’s all I wanted.

  After I unpack, I lie down on the bed for a few minutes. I’m so tired. I didn’t sleep much last night. I kept having nightmares that Holton’s men were following me and then found me and took me back to Italy. I woke up sweating and out of breath and couldn’t get back to sleep.

  When I return to the living room, Pearce is on the phone, facing the windows, his back to me.

  “No, absolutely not. We already agreed to the terms. They can’t go back and change them.” His voice is forceful. Commanding. I find it very sexy.

  He has his suit jacket off and I check out the back of him. I always loved how well his clothes fit him, perfectly tailored to his body. His dress shirt wraps over his broad shoulders with no gaps or wrinkles. My gaze wanders lower, to his gray dress pants, which fit his backside in a way that makes me stare for a moment.

  The room is quiet and I look up and see Pearce swiping through his phone. He still hasn’t noticed I’m here. He puts his phone to his ear. “Hi, honey. How’s everything going?”

  I assume he’s talking to his daughter.

  “What does your mother have planned for the rest of the week?” He listens. “I don’t know yet. Something came up, so I won’t be back tomorrow…No, I don’t need to talk to her…Yes, I’ll call you tomorrow…Love you too…Goodbye.”

  It sounds like he has a good relationship with her. I wonder how often she sees her mother. Does Katherine live next to Pearce? Or did she get the house in the divorce?

  Pearce is on his phone again. “Lisa, I need you to cancel my meetings for the rest of the week, including any conference calls…no, not just today, I need you to clear my calendar for the entire week…I know they’ve been waiting, but something came up…just tell everyone we’ll reschedule…thank you.”

  He ends the call and turns around and sees me there. “Rachel. You should’ve said something. I didn’t know you were there.” He turns his phone off.

  “Pearce, you didn’t have to cancel everything. If you need to work, I can spend time with Jade and Garret.”

  He walks over to me. “You’ve been gone for years. I want to spend every moment I can with you. I don’t care about work. It’ll go on without me. Now should we order some food? I haven’t eaten yet today.”

  “Then yes. Let’s order something.”

  We find the room service menus and he says, “Order whatever you’d like. Don’t worry about the cost.” He smiles. “You always had trouble spending money.”

  I smile back. “No, I didn’t. I just didn’t like buying things I didn’t need.”

  “Well, you arrived here with one suitcase. I think it’s safe to say you need some things. Make a list and I’ll have someone go and get you whatever you need.”

  “I’m assuming I can’t be seen in public. That’s why you’re having someone go shopping for me?”

  He brings me over to the couch to sit down. “I don’t think anyone would know it’s you unless you’re seen with me, and even then I don’t think they would believe it’s you. Only our friends and family would know. That’s why I wasn’t concerned about you being seen here at the hotel. But we do need to figure out a way to bring you back.”

  “You mean, as myself? I was thinking I would have to pretend to be someone else.”

  “No. That’s not a good idea. We used to be in the media a lot and those photos and articles are still out there. It wouldn’t take long for someone to discover it’s you and not whoever you’re pretending to be. I need to give this some thought. For now, let’s not worry about it.” He holds up his menu. “Let’s find something to eat.”

  We order our meals and Pearce orders a bottle of champagne. A half hour later, the waiter arrives and sets up a table in our room, complete with a white linen tablecloth. He sets out our meals and as he leaves, Pearce follows him out into the hall. I assume he’s giving him a tip.

  Pearce returns and opens the champagne and pours it into our glasses. He hands me a glass and holds up his for a toast. “To having you back. And to new beginnings.”

  I smile and clink his glass and sip the champagne. He sets his glass down and comes around and pulls out my chair for me. Once he’s seated in his own chair, he reaches over for my hand. “I meant to say this earlier. You look beautiful, Rachel.”

  “Thank you. You look good too. Don’t you ever age?”

  He laughs and lets go of my hand. “I’m quite certain I’ve aged. Perhaps you don’t remember what I used to look like.”

  I set my napkin on my lap. “I remember. I pictured you every day in my head. I used to imagine you walking in the restaurant. In fact, every time the door opened, I’d check to see if it was you.”

  Guilt covers Pearce’s face and I quickly regret telling him that. It’s not his fault he never showed up. He didn’t know. He never got the message.

  “Garret looks just like you,” I say, changing topics. “Don’t you think?”

  “Yes, we look very similar.” He cuts into his steak.

  “What does your daughter look like?”

  “Lilly looks more like Katherine. Blond hair. Blue eyes. She’s tall for her age, like Garret was.”

  “Does she see her mother much?”

  “No. Katherine is remarried and has a son. She lives in Manhattan and goes to see her sister in Paris several times a year. She doesn’t have much interest in being a mother. She never has.”

  “So you and Lilly live in Connecticut?”

  “Yes. I kept the house after the divorce.”

  “Is it the same house that Garret lived in?”

  “Yes, I built it a couple years after…” He pauses. “After you were gone. It’s a large house. Much larger than we need. I’ve considered selling it and getting something smaller.”

  “Do you have any other houses?” I ask because Katherine seems like someone who would’ve wanted more than one.

  “I own several homes and I have apartments in LA, New York, and London.”

  “Where are your other houses?”

  “I have one outside San Francisco, close to wine country. It’s a smaller home. Then there’s one in Arizona that I bought when the company was expanding in the Southwest. I was there so often for business that it made sense to buy the house, but I haven’t used it in years so it needs to be sold. I have another house in Aspen, which Katherine insisted we buy. She doesn’t ski but her friends had houses there so she wanted one there as well. And then I have one at Hilton Head, which I only go to when I want to get away and do some golfing.”

  “Wow, that�
�s a lot of houses.”

  “Yes, I need to sell some of them.”

  We eat in silence for a few minutes, and as we do, I think about how much Pearce’s life has changed. If I hadn’t left, would we have all those homes? It seems so extravagant and unnecessary. Who needs that many houses and three apartments? He has so much money that maybe it doesn’t seem like a lot to him, but to me it does.

  “I have one more,” I hear Pearce say.

  I look up and see that he’s put his fork down. “One more what?”

  “One more house.” His face is serious and I’m almost afraid of what he’s going to say.

  “Where is it?” I set my fork on my plate.

  His gaze meets mine across the table. “Indiana.”

  My eyes immediately tear up, but I’m smiling. “You kept it?”

  “Yes.” His face has a hint of a smile now. “I wasn’t sure how’d you feel about that, but from your reaction, I think you’re okay with it.”

  “I’m more than okay with it.” I shove my chair back and go around the table and hug him.

  He stands up and hugs me back.

  “Thank you,” I say, hugging him tighter. “For keeping it all these years.”

  “I couldn’t bring myself to sell it. That was your childhood home. And even though I thought you were gone, I couldn’t sell it. It was one of the few remaining pieces of you I had left.”

  I let go of Pearce but hold onto his hand. “It means so much to me that you kept it. I thought for sure you would’ve sold it.”

  “I had no intentions of selling it.” He smiles. “Would you like to go see it? We could even stay there if you’d like.”

  “Doesn’t someone live there?”

  “No. It hasn’t been rented out for years. But I pay someone to take care of it. A retired farmer. I’ve never met him but we’ve talked on the phone. He knew your family.”

  “What’s his name?”

  “Gerald Henderson.”

  I smile. “Yes. I know him. His wife was my teacher back in third grade. So what about the land? Did you keep it too?”

  “Yes. I rent it out to a man who has the farm adjacent to yours.”

  “Have you taken Garret there? To see the house?”