Only Her

by Allie Everhart

  “Lilly worked on her drawings while she was there.” Pearce nods towards Lilly’s backpack that’s sitting on the floor. “Why don’t you show her?”

  She shakes her head. “She doesn’t want to see my artwork, Dad.”

  “I do want to see it,” I say, “if you don’t mind.” I decide not to tell her that I’ve seen the artwork in her room. Kids her age don’t like their parents going in their room when they’re not home and I don’t want her getting mad at Pearce for taking me in there.

  She pulls some sheets of paper from her backpack and hands them to me. They’re all charcoal sketches. The first one is of a little boy. It looks like a professional artist did it.

  “Lilly, this is really good,” I tell her.

  “Thanks,” she says so quietly I almost didn’t hear her.

  “Who’s the little boy?” I ask her.

  “Conner. My half-brother. He’s five.”

  Pearce said Katherine ignores her son almost as much as she ignores Lilly. She’s not even taking him to France with her this summer. She’s leaving him with his father and the nanny.

  I continue to look at the drawings. Some are of people and some are of buildings in Manhattan, which is where Katherine lives.

  “These are amazing.” I hand them back to her. “You’re really talented.”

  “It’s just a hobby.” She shoves them into her backpack. “Dad, can I go upstairs now?”

  “Yes. Go ahead.” He gives her a side hug, then she takes her backpack and disappears up the stairs.

  “She’s very sweet,” I say, sitting next to Pearce. “Is she always that shy?”

  “No. She only acts that way when she first meets someone. Once she’s comfortable with you, she’s more talkative.”

  “What did she say when you told her about me?”

  “She was shocked, but said she was happy for me. And for Garret.”

  “That’s nice that she said that. Most children her age would be angry.”

  “She’s not like that. She’s always put others before herself. She’s the complete opposite of her mother.”

  “Maybe you should go talk to her.”

  “I will, but not right now. I need to give her time to absorb this. This is a big change for her. It’s just been her and me for years now. I texted Garret and told him to call her. The two of them are close and she always confides in him. He’ll let me know what she says.”

  “Where did she learn to draw like that?”

  “She taught herself. When she was younger, Katherine made Lilly stay in her room all the time, so she drew pictures to pass the time and became quite good at it.”

  “She’s more than good. She could be a professional artist.”

  “Yes, well, I’m not sure what her future holds so it’s best if she continues to see it as just a hobby.”

  “Are you saying the organization might try to dictate her profession?”

  “According to the rules, Lilly will take over the company someday since Garret didn’t. Or she can have the man she marries take over as CEO. She’s supposed to marry one of the members someday.”

  “Pearce, you can’t make her do that. If you got Garret out of his obligation, why can’t you get Lilly out of hers?”

  “Because Katherine wants Lilly to be part of it. And so does Leland. He’s already trying to find Lilly a husband. It’s another reason I despise that man.”

  Pearce’s phone rings. “It’s Garret.” He answers the call and puts it on speaker. “Hello, Garret.”

  “Hey, Dad. How was the trip?”

  “It was good. Your mother’s here. I have you on speaker.”

  “Hey, Mom.”

  “Hi, honey.” I already miss him, and hearing his voice makes me miss him even more.

  “What do think of the house?” he asks.

  “It’s very, um…large.”

  He laughs a little. “Yeah, I knew you wouldn’t like it. It’s way too big and way too white.”

  “Speaking of houses,” Pearce says, “tell Grace if she’s still planning on selling the house in Santa Barbara, we’d like to buy it.”

  “Are you serious? So you’re really moving here?”

  “Yes, but I’m not sure when, so don’t tell anyone yet, other than Grace.”

  “You’ll only be an hour away. That’s great. Hey, I was calling because I just talked to Lilly.”

  Pearce sits up straighter. “And what did she say?”

  “That she hated being with Katherine last week. You’ve gotta stop making her go there, Dad.”

  “I can’t ban her from seeing her mother. I thought Lilly wanted to see her.”

  “She did, but as usual, Katherine ignored her, and now Lilly’s all depressed.”

  Pearce sighs. “She didn’t tell me that. I thought she was quiet on the ride home because of the news about your mother.”

  “I don’t think so. I think it was because she was sad about how Katherine treated her. Oh, and Mom, Lilly said she thought you were really nice.”

  I smile. “That’s good. She was so quiet I thought maybe she didn’t like me.”

  “She takes a while to warm up to people. When she gets to know you, she’ll love you.” The baby cries in the background. “Abi’s up from her nap. I’ve gotta get her before she wakes up Jade. They were both napping.”

  “Give them both a hug for me,” I tell him. “Love you.”

  “Love you too. I’ll talk to you guys later.”

  At noon, Pearce, Lilly, and I have lunch. I ask Lilly questions about her school and her friends and she starts to relax as she tells me about them. She keeps glancing at her dad, and I can’t tell what she’s thinking. She does the same thing at dinner.

  That night, Pearce goes into his home office to do some work and I go upstairs to talk to Lilly. I find her in her room, watching TV.

  “Can I come in?” I ask her.

  “Yeah.” She turns the TV down and sits up on her bed. She’s wearing pink pajama pants and a white tank top dotted with pink flowers.

  I sit at the end of her bed. “I just wanted to say that I know this is a big change having me show up in your dad’s life like this, but I’ll do whatever I can to make this easier on you.”

  She pulls her knees to her chest, wrapping her arms around them. “Do you love him?”

  “Yes. With all my heart.”

  She glances down at the bed and quietly says, “He loves you too. I can tell.” Her finger traces over the swirling pink lines on her comforter. “He never looked at my mom the way he looks at you. Even her new husband doesn’t.”

  I don’t know how to respond to that, so I wait for her to continue.

  “Dad said someone took you away and you couldn’t remember who you were.”

  Pearce told her the fake story. He couldn’t tell her the real story, given that she doesn’t know about the organization or her family’s involvement in it.

  Her eyes move up to mine. “That must’ve been scary.”

  “It was, but it’s over now.”

  “Did you used to know my mom? Before you were gone?”

  “Yes. I went to some parties at her house. Well, her parents’ house.”

  “So you know my grandparents?” She doesn’t let me answer. “I never see them. They live in New York. They don’t really like kids. Whenever I go there, they make me go in the study and read.”

  “Do you like to read?”

  “I’d rather paint. Or draw.”

  “I love your artwork,” I say, glancing at it on the walls. “You’re very talented.”

  “Thanks.” She hesitates, then says, “I have some more.”

  “More artwork? Can I see it?”

  “Really?” Her face lights up.

  “Yes. I’d love to see it.”

  She hops off her bed and races over to her dresser. She opens the bottom drawer and pulls out a box and brings it over to me. “These are ones I did when I was at Garret’s house last summer.”

  She shows
me drawings of Jade and Garret, and Abigail when she was a tiny infant. She also has some of her dad, and one of Pearce and Garret together.

  “These are really good,” I tell her as I spread them out over her bed. “You should frame them.”

  “I have too many. I just hang them on my walls. Do you want that?” She points to the one I’m holding, which is of Pearce and Garret. “You can have it.”

  “Thank you. I’m definitely framing it.”

  She smiles really wide. “I have ones I drew of Jade and Garret when they were dating.” She returns to her drawer and pulls out another box. “I was only six when I drew these so they’re not very good. I just used crayons.” She takes out a drawing of Garret wearing a suit and Jade wearing a purple dress. “That was the first time I met Jade. I liked her right away. I wanted her to be my sister,” she laughs a little, “and now she is.”

  The drawing is just another reminder of how much I missed of Garret’s life. All his college years. His wedding. Just as I’m thinking that, Lilly shows me a drawing she did at their wedding. It’s good for a six-year-old.

  “I was the flower girl,” she says proudly.

  Garret showed me his wedding photos last week. Lilly looked adorable.

  “Anyway, that’s some of my drawings.” She packs them up and stores them back in the dresser.

  “Thanks for showing them to me.” I wait until she comes back over to the bed, then say, “Garret said you also like to swim.”

  “Yeah. I’m not as good as Garret but I’m getting better. I have a swim coach.”

  “I’m a swimmer too. Maybe we could go swimming tomorrow.”

  Her face lights up again. “Okay.”

  She seems shocked that I want to spend time with her. She also seemed shocked when I asked to see her drawings. From what Garret said, it sounds like Katherine ignores Lilly, so maybe she thinks I’m the same way. I’m determined to show her I’m not, and that I really want to get to know her. I just hope she wants to get to know me.

  I stand up. “Well, I’ll let you finish watching TV.”

  “Do you wanna watch with me?”

  I smile at her. “I’d love to.”

  She scoots over on her bed and I sit next to her and we watch a show I’ve never seen, or even heard of, but it doesn’t matter. What matters is that I’m starting to connect with her.

  At ten-thirty Pearce finds us. “Have you two been up here all night?” He smiles.

  Lilly answers. “I was showing Rachel my drawings, then we watched TV.”

  He comes over and kisses her head. “You need to get to bed. It’s late.”

  “There’s no school, Dad. It’s summer break.”

  “I know, but you still need your rest.”

  “He’s right,” I say. “If you want to beat me in the pool tomorrow, you need your rest.”

  “We’re racing?” she asks, her voice excited.

  “Yes. And I used to be a very fast swimmer so you better get some sleep.”

  “You two are going swimming?” Pearce helps me off the bed. “What other plans did you make without me?”

  “That’s it.” Lilly shoves her covers back, slipping under them.

  “Goodnight,” Pearce says as we walk out.

  “Night, Dad. Night, Rachel.”

  “Goodnight, Lilly.”

  Pearce and I go to our room and he closes the door.

  “I’m sorry I didn’t find you earlier. I had some work issues to deal with that couldn’t wait.”

  “It’s fine. It gave me some time to spend with Lilly.”

  He draws me into him, his arms around my waist. “Thank you for making such an effort with her.”

  “She’s your daughter. I want to get to know her, and I don’t want her to ever feel like I’m trying to take you away from her. I want us all to be a family.” I pause. “Maybe I shouldn’t ask this, but how did she turn out so well? With Katherine as her mother, I’m surprised Lilly doesn’t act like her.”

  “That was all Garret’s doing. When I was working all the time, he took care of her and played with her and taught her things, like how to not be like Katherine. That’s why Garret and Lilly have such a close relationship.”

  I smile. “We raised a good son, didn’t we?”

  “You did. He is who he is because of you.” He kisses me. “Let’s go to bed.”

  The next morning, Pearce goes into his home office to work on the plan to tell the media about me. We’re telling them tomorrow. Pearce has already filmed a video of himself making a statement that will be sent to all the news outlets.

  While he’s busy doing that, Lilly and I swim in the indoor pool. It’s not warm enough to be in the outdoor pool and the indoor pool is better for swimming laps.

  “I won!” Lilly says as she reaches the edge of the pool.

  We did some practice laps and just had our first race. She’s a fast swimmer, but not nearly as fast as Garret. I raced him last week and couldn’t keep up. But he swims all the time and I haven’t been swimming in years. In Italy, I didn’t have access to a pool. Garret told me Lilly swims almost every day, but not for hours, like he used to when he was her age.

  “Good job, honey.” I wipe my eyes and notice her giving me a funny look, then realize what I said. “I’m sorry. Do you not want me to call you that?”

  She shrugs. “It’s okay. I don’t mind. Do you want to race again?”

  “Definitely. We’re just warming up.”

  She smiles and sets herself up in her lane. I do the same, and we race again. She beats me, but not by much.

  “Can I show you something?” I ask her.

  “Yeah.” She adjusts her swim cap.

  I demonstrate as I talk. “When you’re doing the front crawl, I notice you bring your left arm up a little too high, which can slow you down. If you want to go faster, try to keep that arm a little lower.”

  She’s quiet and I’m worried she’s mad at me for correcting her, but then she says, “Will you watch me?”

  “Of course. Go ahead.”

  She swims a lap, this time with her arm lower. I don’t know if she went any faster but her form was better.

  “How was that?” she asks when she’s back beside me.

  “Much better. Your form looked really good that time.”

  “My coach never told me about my arm.”

  “Maybe he just didn’t notice it. Ready to race again?”

  “Yeah, but first, will you time me?”

  “Sure. Do you have a stopwatch?”

  She jumps out of the pool and takes it off the rack where they keep the towels. She returns to the pool, handing me the watch, and I time her as she does another lap.

  “That’s faster than I do at practice,” she says when I tell her her time. “Thanks for helping me.”

  I smile at her. “You’re welcome.”

  Lilly’s a sweet girl. Very polite. But she also seems a little sad. I think it’s because of her mother. Lilly keeps making comments about how her mom doesn’t like her artwork, and doesn’t want her swimming, and doesn’t like the way she dresses or how she wears her hair. It sounds like all Katherine does is criticize her daughter and yet Lilly seems desperate to please her, or just get some attention from her that isn’t negative.

  We continue racing for an hour and Lilly can’t stop smiling. She said she hasn’t had anyone to race with since Garret left, which is sad because Garret moved away five years ago.

  “How’s it going in here?” Pearce walks in, wearing a suit. He dressed casually last week, but now he’s back in work mode and dressed accordingly.

  Lilly swims to the edge of the pool. “Rachel helped me with my form.”

  He smiles. “She used to give swimming lessons. Did she tell you that?”

  “It was a long time ago,” I tell her.

  “Lilly, why don’t you go get ready for lunch?” Pearce says. “I need to speak with Rachel a moment.”

  “Okay.” She gets out of the pool and grabs a to
wel and leaves the room.

  “Is something wrong?” I ask him as I take a towel and wrap it around me. I take another one for my hair, drying it as I walk over to Pearce.

  “Everything’s fine. I just wanted to let you know that I have to attend a meeting for the organization later today. William has alerted them of your return and they called for an emergency meeting.”

  My pulse quickens. “What does this mean? Are they going to do something to you? Or to me?”

  “Relax, sweetheart. I’m just going there to answer any questions they have and to tell them I plan on marrying you again.”

  “Pearce, maybe you shouldn’t tell them that. What if they try to punish you?”

  “They already punished me once for marrying you. Technically, they can’t do it again. But since you’re not one of us, I’m sure I’ll have to give them something in return for them allowing me to be with you. They like to make deals, so we’ll decide what that is during this meeting.”

  “I don’t want you making deals with them. We just won’t get married. Besides, in my mind, we’re already married. We always have been. I don’t need to have another ceremony to prove it.”

  He holds both my hands and sets his eyes on mine. “I want us to be husband and wife again. Officially. So I will do whatever I have to do to make that happen.”

  “But—”

  He stops me with a kiss. “Don’t argue with me about this. I’m marrying you.” He smiles. “Unless you turn down my proposal.”

  “I guess you’ll have to wait and see.” I smile, but then frown as I remember something.

  “Rachel, what’s wrong?”

  “I don’t have my ring anymore. Jack took my wedding ring before I left. I don’t know what he did with it.”

  “I’ll get you a new one.”

  I nod. “It’s just that I loved that ring. You went to New York and went shopping and picked it out yourself, and that made it really special.”

  He cups my cheek. “I will go shopping again and pick out a new one.”

  I laugh a little. “You hate shopping.”

  “Yet I will do it for you.” He kisses me.

  “Remember when I first made you go shopping? You were so uncomfortable. You couldn’t get out of that mall fast enough.”

  He chuckles. “Yes. You made me buy jeans. The first pair I ever owned. My mother still scolds me for wearing them. And I’ve lost count how many times she’s lectured me about Garret and Lilly wearing them.” He gets a stern look on his face as he imitates her. “Those children should not be seen in denim pants. It’s a disgrace, Pearce.”