"I am. It's just darker. I don't like being dirty blonde unless I have to be. A man like Nick can definitely make you doubt your feminine charms I guess."
"It wasn't that. I know he wants me. I know he thinks I'm beautiful. I just can't get around the fact that he thinks everything has to be so cut and dried. How can you really say when you know that you want to be with someone forever?"
"I knew I wanted to be with Carson the second I saw him. He's not gorgeous like Nick. He may not be quite as smart. But he's the sweetest, most caring man I've ever known. The way he talks about his son, you can see how much he loves him. How much it tears him up that he hasn't been able to be a part of his life for so long. He tries to play it cool, and yeah I'm sure that he's been to bed with plenty of tramps in his day, but deep down Carson is the same romantic fool that Nick is. He just chooses not to turn away a good thing when it stares him in the face. I'm not saying that it's going to be easy. Elijah might not adjust as well as I hope he will to being with us because he's barely seen his Dad since he was a baby. We'll probably have to be married for five years before people even halfway believe in us because we're doing everything so quickly. My own mother won't come to the wedding. She thinks I'm a complete moron. She never liked Brian, wasn't thrilled that I got knocked up with his kid. Now I'm marrying a guy who’s not the father of my child when I've known him less than two weeks? She's probably right to think I'm crazy. But crazy or not, I know it’s right. I'm just afraid that Nick is going to be so stubborn about everything being so right that he's going to lose you. What if you decide you're totally and utterly in love with him, would marry him right then and there and he doesn't buy it?"
Ami had had the same thought. "That's what I'm afraid of too."
“He’ll get over it I’m sure. Let's get this stuff to the laundry mat before it's too late."
"Okay."
She went upstairs and got her clothes together, went back down, put everything in the trunk of her car and then helped Alicia haul her and Carson's clothes out.
They had quite a bit between the two of them. It took them three trips back and forth to the car once they had arrived at the laundry mat. Ami was relieved when everything was in the washers. She hated laundry mats.
When they had settled back into the uncomfortable chairs Ali was ready to grill her again.
"So was he as good as you thought he'd be?"
"He was even better. I don't get him at all. He drives me crazy. I know that it's right when he kisses me, when he holds me. I know that it's still going to feel right tomorrow and probably a year from now. Why does he have to want me to be so sure that it's still going to feel right ten years from now? Who the hell knows what's going to feel right ten years from now? A lot of married people don't feel the exact same way about their spouse that they did ten years ago."
"I know. As convinced as I am that I'm going to want Carson the same way ten years from now that I want him now, I'm not sure. I wouldn't be marrying him if I didn't think we had a future together. But that's different. Honestly, I think Nick is just as scared as you are and he's making pretty excuses to cover it up. I'll bet he told you about Cammy the night you met him didn't he?"
Ami nodded.
"Carson told me that he's got this thing. If Nick thinks he's got a chance at anything long term with a woman, he'll tell her about Cammy right away. If he doesn't he won't bother. I think it's kind of his way of putting up a wall. He wants you to know that he's been burned before. He wants to see how you react. Carson said that girls who go too far, he dismisses. If some chick is too overboard about it, he thinks she's either done it herself or would do it herself. Carson said that Nick's got it in his head that you're going to be the love of his life. He wants everything to be right, to be perfect. He doesn't want you to just want his body; he wants you to want his heart, too. That makes sense. Guys get tired of screwing around too. But the pretty picture Nick has in his head scares him to death. He's so sure that he knows exactly what he wants, because he was willing to take that step with Cammy a while ago. But he walked away. And not just because she was pregnant with some other guy's kid. That helped of course, but he didn't just walk away from his Dad, he walked away from Cammy. I think he would have walked away from her before they got married anyway. And he knows it. Now he plays that he knows exactly what he wants, when he really doesn't. Yes, I think that Nick would make a good husband, a good father. But no matter what Nick says, deep down he's afraid that he won't be. He's got to stop trying to plan everything and just let it go. He's had two real girlfriends since Carson's known him. The first one he chased away because she wanted a pretty man to play with and he wanted more. Said the ‘l’ word and she was out the door. The second one, she was living with him. They were talking about marriage and then all of a sudden there's this guy showing up on his doorstep with two kids saying that she needs to come home. Turned out she was already married and had walked away about a year before then. That messed him up of course, so he pretty much gave up until you came into the picture. I don't know what to tell you to do about Nick. You can't pressure him because he'll bolt. But you can't leave him alone completely because he'll think you don't want him. Let me tell you what I'd do if I were in your shoes. Flirt with him but don't take it too far. Hang out with him, kinda platonic, but don't ask him after the first couple times. Make him ask you. If you're hanging out and he seems okay with you putting your head on his chest or holding his hand, go with it. But again don't take it too far. If he puts his arm around you first that's even better. Hug him every chance you get to make sure that he misses the feeling of you in his arms, but don't kiss him unless he kisses you first. I guess that about sums it up.” Alicia smiled. "I see you two getting together by Valentine's Day at the latest."
"I hope so.”
"So," Alicia said after they had transferred the clothes from the washers to dryers. "We've been blabbing about your night with Nick all morning and we haven't talked about why you went over there in the first place. What did this Angela girl tell you about Gabe?"
Ami sighed and as if in response, her cell phone chimed a text message. She had a feeling she knew who it was. She dug it out of her purse and confirmed it. It was Gabe. She almost wanted to read the message out loud to Alicia but she didn't. Instead she silently read ‘Ami, you seemed tense when you wrote me last night. What's wrong baby? Whatever it is I'll take care of it for you. I miss you and can't wait until our next night together. I'm counting the minutes but they're too long, Gabe’
She didn't know how to answer but knew she had to. She sighed again. Maybe she would show Alicia the message after she'd told her about Angela, but she was going to answer him now.
‘Gabe I'm fine. Please don't worry about me. I'll see you soon.’
She didn't know whether it would get him off of her back or for how long, but she was already very tired of whatever game Gabe was playing. She wanted it to be over.
"Sorry. Well, it was practically a horror story. Gabe lied to me about a lot of things. Including the fact that his kids aren't really his. I guess Angela happened to see the papers where he'd made his wife get DNA tests and they're both his."
"Wait." She had a feeling with this story Ali was going to be interrupting her a lot. "He made his wife get paternity tests on both his kids and he found out that they're his but he still told you they weren't?"
"Yeah. There's more. A lot more. According to Angela, he did sleep with all the women that worked for him. He gave her a $1.50 an hour more than he said he was going to start her pay out at because she gave him head the day he hired her. They had sex like everywhere in the bar. She said that he gave her the same line that he gave me about putting me in a better paying job at one of the other places he owns. Talked about leaving his wife for her, marrying her and having kids with her. Then he sent flowers and a necklace to her house when he knew she was at work and her boyfriend was home. She said he was parked across the street and watched her boyfriend drive away when he left her. That he used to
sit outside her house and just watch her. He wouldn't leave her alone until he found another girl and decided he was done with her."
"He sounds downright certifiable Ami. That man is scary. Yeah, so there are a lot of men that are married and play around. I'm sure a lot of women have heard that sorry line about leaving the wife on a day that never comes. But he was stalking her. He did something to make sure that her boyfriend knew they were messing around. Honey, you've got to quit. Like right now. Start working for Nick. He may drive you crazy but at least he's safe."
"I'd feel bad quitting. I really like Candy and Rick."
"Honey, there is no feeling bad. We are talking about your safety."
"Well, Angela said that might not work. If he doesn't think he's done with a girl she said that he'll do things to mess up her life. Spread rumors and stuff."
"Rumors don't mean shit. Idiots who take rumors as the gospel need to get a life. And it doesn't matter. Nick's got enough pull with Bobby that no matter what kind of bull was going around about you, he'd still be able to hire you. Nick's the glue that holds that place together. He may act like it's nothing, but Nick ain't no assistant manager. Bobby may own the place but Nick takes care of everything."
"I don't want to quit yet. I like my job. I'll be okay. I already promised Nick that I'd quit if anything happens."
"It's already happening. You're in a load of shit already; you just don't want to see it. Who was that that texted you a few minutes ago?"
She looked away from her friend. "Gabe."
"Did he text you last night?"
"Yeah."
"Did you let Nick read it?"
"Yeah."
Alicia sighed. "If that man wasn't so damned stubborn and scared he'd already have you working at the bowling alley and living in his spare bedroom. He's just afraid that if you're so close he won't be able to control himself. Damn Ami you sure know how to pick ‘em."
"Yeah."
"I didn't mean it like that sweetie. It's frustrating to see you caught up in this mess, especially with all that you’ve already been through. I don't want to hear that you said no and Gabe raped you. Nick would end up in jail because if he really did something there wouldn't be any holding him back. You take all that frustration he's building up every second he plays the gentleman and won't let himself have you and it would explode. It wouldn't surprise me if he killed that sick fuck. I'm surprised some jaded boyfriend hasn't taken him out already. Promise me that you'll be careful. Promise me that if anything happens, I don't care what is it, you'll call me. Call Carson and Nick, too.”
“I will.”
Dryers were starting to buzz. They talked as they folded their laundry but it wasn't as serious.
There was no more talk about Nick or Gabe. Ami was glad. Her head was already way too full of the men in her life.
By the time they got the car unloaded back at the apartment it was after one. She parted ways with Alicia and went upstairs to put her clothes away.
She took a shower and then made herself soup for lunch, spending the remainder of her time before work reading.
Chapter 13
She was glad to see that Gabe wasn't around when she got to the bar. He had said he wouldn't be but then again she was going to take Angela's advice and not take anything he said as the complete truth anymore.
Rick seemed glad to see her. Though the night was slow she was finding herself more at ease behind the bar.
She and Rick didn't talk much about her when they were cleaning up. She let him talk about Candy and his unborn child and his aspirations in his nursing career. It wasn't that he didn't ask her questions; it's that Rick took the cue that she didn't want to talk about herself.
Gabe left her alone and she was relieved when she pulled out of the parking lot. Her phone had been silent all night until she was stopped at a stop sign halfway home. She picked it up and was happy that it was Nick.
"Hello."
"Hi. How'd it go at work tonight?"
"It was fine. Rick's a sweetheart. Gabe didn't show."
She was pulling into the parking lot by then. The light was off at Carson's so she figured either Ali wasn't getting any late night phone calls or she was too tired and had taken the night off.
She got out of her car and locked it. Nick said "Did he text you again?"
"Yeah." She looked across the street, hoping she wasn't seeing what she thought she was seeing. "Hold on a second Nick."
"Ami, what's going on?"
"I need to look at something." She shielded her eyes from the glare of the streetlights and looked harder. Yes, it was what she thought it was. Gabe had left her alone at work but he was sitting on the side street across from her apartment.
She wondered if she should confront him. She could hear Nick asking her a question but she had no clue what he said. She dropped her purse because her hands were suddenly shaking and decided to go upstairs.
Only when she was in her apartment with the door locked behind her did she turn her attention back to Nick. "I'm sorry. I'm here."
"What's up Ami? How come you didn't answer me? I was about to get dressed and come over there."
"It's nothing. He was probably making sure I got home okay. It's not a big deal Nick."
"What are you talking about?" His voice had an edge to it. "Who followed you home?"
"He didn't follow me home. Or at least I don't think he did." She got up and peeked out her window. Yes, he was still there. "Gabe is sitting across the street from my apartment."
"I'm coming over."
"No, you're not." Much as she wanted him to, she wasn't going to let him she thought.
"Why not?"
"Because you know what will happen if you come over here. Gabe will probably be gone and we'll end up doing something you don't want us to do."
He sighed. "Fine. But if he's there again, you call the cops."
"A lot of good that did Angela. He's not doing anything wrong. Technically."
"He's stalking you."
"Not really. He's just. . . I don't know what the hell he's doing Nick."
Her phone beeped in her ear. It was either call waiting or a text message.
"Ami, if something bad happens to you I'll never forgive myself."
"I promise I'll be careful. I'll try to put him off. Maybe if I tell him no enough, he'll give up."
"I doubt it. Has he followed you home before?"
"Not that I know of. He wanted to Saturday night but I wouldn't let him."
"That was the night you. . ."
"Yeah." She looked out the window again. He was gone. "He's gone Nick."
"Good. Make sure your door and all your windows are locked. Call me if something comes up no matter what time it is."
"Okay."
"Goodnight Ami."
"Night Nick."
She wondered if he was going to call her every night. The thought was a comfort. She sat down on the couch and lit a cigarette. The beep had been a text message. It was from Gabe.
It said ‘I had to see you. I need to touch you, to taste you. Don't make me wait too long.’
Again, she had no idea how to answer him.
She didn't want to say the wrong thing, but she didn't want to encourage him either.
She thought about ignoring him but she didn't want to find out if what Angela said was true and she didn't want him to show up when she was working either. She didn't want Rick in the middle of this. Rick wasn't stupid. He might have a lot of respect for their employer, a lot more than a lot of people seemed to, but he had enough to deal with.
Finally she said ‘I’ll let you know.’
It might piss him off but she hoped that he'd at least give her some space until the weekend.
She was trying to take everything a day at a time and not worry too much. Her sleep was uneasy that night. She dreamed that Gabe was peeking in her bedroom window, watching her sleep. She knew it couldn’t happen because of the way her apartment was situated, but it wasn’t hard
to see where the dream had come from.
After breakfast, she went downstairs to talk to Ali but her friend wasn't around. Before she headed back up-stairs, after having stopped to check her mail, she felt a need to look across the street.
He was sitting there again. She could see his blonde head leaned against the back of the seat.
She fought an urge to call Nick, and instead hurried back upstairs.
Less than thirty minutes later there was a knock at her door. She thought it was going to be Gabe, knew it was going to be Gabe. She almost didn't answer.
Finally she opened it and stood face to face with a delivery man. He was holding a large bouquet of roses and a blue velvet jewelry box.
"You Ami?"
"Yeah."
"Here ya go."
"Thanks," she said, not wanting to take the flowers that he practically shoved into her hands.
"You have a nice day Ami."
"Thank you. You, too."
She shut the door and debated throwing it all in the trash. She went back to the window.
She could see the delivery guy getting into his truck but it momentarily blocked her view to where Gabe had been parked. Once the truck had moved, she saw that Gabe was still there. But he left as soon as the delivery truck had cleared the corner.
The flowers were already in a nice vase, so she left them there. She took out the card and read the words. ‘Yours Forever, Gabe.’
She didn't want him forever Ami thought. She didn't want him at all anymore. Whatever stupid notions she'd had about any kind of a relationship with him had been blown out of the water when Angela had started talking the other night.
This was it she thought. She was going to give him her two weeks’ notice. Tonight. She couldn't do this.
She figured it was safer to text Nick than call him since he might be at work. She said ‘Can I work for you in two weeks?’
He replied quickly ‘What's going on?’
‘I’ll tell you later. Can I work for you? I'll do whatever you need me to.’
‘Of course. I'll let Bobby know. Are you okay?’
‘I'm fine. Thank you Nick.’
Misty Reigenborn Romance Boxed Set Page 86