Camp Creepy Time_The Adventures of Einstein P. Fleet

by Dann Gershon

  That all changed when Big Al heard about Nurse Knock-wurst’s discovery of the salt tablets. They had quickly formed  a partnership, put together a new crew, and headed back to  his old stomping grounds in the middle of the Mojave Desert.  Now that the salt tablets had transformed the campers into  monsters just as the nurse had promised, it was payday.

  “Bring them to me,” Mucho demanded. “Your money is  waiting, along with a substantial bonus if these Earth stories  are as good as the last.”

  Big Al had anticipated this response from Mucho. In fact, he  had counted on it. He knew that once Mucho had his monsters,  Big Al didn’t stand a chance of getting paid, let alone staying  alive, unless he had more to offer in the future. Mucho would  get rid of all of them. “Just wait until you see the monsters in  these modern stories. Looks like I’m going to have to put off  retirement for a while,” Big Al lied. “There’s a fortune to be  made on this planet.”

  The transmission went dead.

  Big Al looked down at the panel and saw the coordinates  begin to appear. He stood up and stretched. It would take a  few minutes to finish, and watching it wouldn’t make it happen  any faster. Suddenly, he sensed another movement. This time  he was certain. He looked over at the navigation station and  saw a hand reaching for a pair of scissors that someone had  carelessly left on the console. The chubby paw looked very  familiar. “What are you doing, Fleet?”

  “I was looking for the arts and crafts center,” Einstein said,  coming out of hiding. “I was going to make you a lanyard as a   going-away present.”

  1 10 “Still the camp clown, I see.” He picked Einstein up with one  hand and tossed him across the room. “I should have done that  the first time I laid eyes on you.”

  Einstein got up and pointed the business end of the blaster  at Big Al’s chest.

  Big Al smiled. “I underestimated you, Fleet, but it won’t  happen again.”

  “Let’s make it interesting, shall we?” Einstein said softly. He  placed the blaster in his belt and walked toward Big Al. The  two of them circled each other, jockeying for position.

  “I’m an expert with this weapon, son.” Big Al laughed. “You  have guts; I’ll give you that. You have any smart-ass remarks to  make before I spill your guts all over my nice clean floor?”

  “Yeah. This camp sucks!” Einstein said. “Now quit stalling  and make your move. I haven’t got all day.”

  “So long, chubby!”

  Big Al drew, but Einstein was faster. The boy fired a single  shot and hit Big Al dead center in the chest. A blue field from  the surge of the blaster surrounded him as he dropped to his  knees. He stared at Einstein in disbelief. “Where did you learn  to shoot like that?”

  “Video games,” Einstein replied.

  Big Al leaned over and pushed one of the buttons on the  control panel. “The clock is ticking.”

  Einstein looked down at the rectangular window on the  panel. A series of black numbers flashed across a white screen.  It was a very long sequence and it was constantly changing.  Einstein suspected that the transporter was calculating the  coordinates to lock in location, taking into account all of the  variables such as planet rotation, gravitational pull, and other  factors. Suddenly it stopped. As soon as it did, the panel next  to it lit up and another series of numbers appeared. Big Al  was right. Thirty minutes counting down. Einstein removed his  journal from his backpack and jotted down a note. He put it  back and headed for the door.

  “This isn’t over, Fleet,” Big Al said as he collapsed on the  floor.

  Einstein watched as Big Al began to melt. It was like watch-ing a fire in a wax museum. “It is for you, pal,” Einstein said.

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  Day Eight — 2:08 P.M. instein ran back up to the holding area as fast as he could.  As he passed through the door, it seemed as if little progress  had been made since he left. About half of the campers had  been stripped of tape and none of them was awake. He was  even more surprised to see Roxie and Greeley standing there  doing nothing. “There’s no time for a coffee break, guys. Every-one get back to work!”

  Einstein felt something cold and hard pressed against his  back. “Put your hands up,” Bucky ordered as he reached into  Einstein’s belt and took away the blaster. “Where’s Big Al?”

  “He’s up in the main cabin,” Einstein replied. “When I left,  he was having a meltdown. The man’s been under a great deal  of stress lately.”

  “And Nurse Knockwurst?”

  “She’s in the lab, catching up on her beauty sleep.” “I can’t take any more of this, kid,” Curly said. He pointed his

  blaster at Einstein and waved good-bye. “So long, camper.” Bucky grabbed his arm and stopped him. “Not yet,” he said.  “We still need to find the antidote. Where is it, Fleet?”

  “I don’t know what you’re talking about,” Einstein lied. Bucky looked at the cook. “Check out his . . . Mmmmm!” “What’s a Mmmmm?” Curly asked.

  The alien’s face was ashen. “Look behind you, man.”

  The cook turned around and found himself face-to-face with  one of the mummies. Manny picked Curly up and squeezed him  until he dropped his weapon. “Let go of me, you bag of rags!”  the cook screamed, gasping for breath. The mummy obeyed  and dropped him on his head. Curly hit the floor and tried  to reach for his blaster. Manny pinned the cook’s gun hand  beneath his foot.

  Einstein knelt down and picked up the weapon. “Thanks,  Manny,” he said to the mummy. “I owe you one.”

  The  mummy  gave  Einstein  a  big  bandaged  thumbs-up,  and  then  stomped  on  the  cook’s  back  for  good  measure.  “Mmmmm!”

  Bucky was surrounded by a couple of vampires and were-wolves. One of the werewolves had taken his blaster and had  him covered. The vampires were eyeing him like a hot meal.  “Is there time for a little snack?” Vinnie asked, staring at  Bucky’s neck.

  Einstein shook his head. “Maybe later,” he replied. Einstein  surveyed the room. All of the campers were awake, but only  half had been untied. He looked at his watch. Only twenty  minutes left to free the rest and get th
em clear of the barn.  “Right now we have work to do.”

  The antidote had partially worked. The campers still looked  like monsters, but they seemed cognizant of their human side.  Einstein put the monster half to work. He ordered the camp-ers who were free to help free the others. The werewolves and

  1 vampires used their claws and teeth to tear through the tape,  while the mummies used their strength to do the rest. Under  Einstein’s  supervision,  the  job  was  finished  quickly.  After  the campers were freed, he instructed them to toss their ex- counselors into their own individual pods. “Have a nice trip,  boys,” Einstein said, “and don’t bother to write.”

  “What happened to us?” Billy Armstrong shouted, looking  at his paws. The rest of the werewolves looked at Einstein and  howled for an answer.

  “I can explain everything,” Einstein said, “but we don’t have  much time.”

  The campers gathered around him in a circle.

  “My fellow Creepy Timers,” he began, “in less than twenty  minutes a wormhole will open and we will all be sucked into  outer space.”

  “Vat can ve do?” Vinnie asked.

  “There  is  a  time  to  fight  and  a  time  to  run,”  Einstein   replied.

  “Mmmmm!” Manny and the rest of the mummies shouted.

  “I agree with Manny! Let’s run for our lives!” Einstein com-manded, leading the way out into the corridor. He stopped  and looked around. There was a small problem. He was lost.  Greeley had transported him into the ship, but he had no clue  how to get off. “Does anyone know how to get out of here?”

  “I do,” Roxie replied.

  “Everyone follow Roxie,” Einstein shouted. “Last one out of  the spaceship is a rotten egg!”

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  IDay Eight — 2:22 P.M.

  ’ll see you around the campfire, Fleet,” Billy Armstrong said,  holding out his paw. “I’m sorry for all the trouble.” Einstein knocked away the paw and gave him a bear hug.  “Yeah, me too, Billy.” The werewolf smiled, and then ran out of  the barn, picking up a mummy along the way. Einstein shouted  after him, “You guys still owe me a box of Twinkies!”

  Roxie and Einstein watched the rest of the campers file  out of the barn. The vampires turn into bats and flew away.  The mummies moved slowly out the door, dragging strands  of gauze and blue tape behind them. The werewolves picked  them up, one by one, and carried them. Slowly, all the campers  disappeared into the desert except for Einstein.

  “It’s time for you to go,” Roxie whispered to Einstein. “Get  as far away from the barn as you can. When the wormhole  opens, everything within a fifty-yard radius of the barn will be  sucked into deep space.”

  Einstein looked at Roxie and gave it one last shot. “You’re  sure that there is no other way?”

  “I have a score to settle with Mucho Fahn,” Roxie said firmly,  “and nothing is going to stop me from settling it.”

  “Nothing?” Big Al said, standing behind them. Most of him  had melted away. Other parts were still glowing blue and bub-bling. “We’ll see about that.”

  “That’s impossible,” Einstein said to Roxie, his voice shak-ing. “I liquidated him.”

  She shook her head. “You liquidated his disguise.”

  Big Al’s entire body began to pulsate like a beating heart  and what remained of his costume peeled away. A few small  cracks of white light appeared, followed by a few more. Sud-denly, Big Al exploded. All Einstein could see was his silhouette  standing in the middle of a cloud of dust. The man was about  six feet tall, but the alien was a good four feet taller and at least  twice as broad. The sight sent shivers down Einstein’s spine.

  “It’s time for Plan B!” he whispered to Roxie.

  “We don’t have a Plan B.”

  “Too bad.” Einstein sighed. “We could really use one right  about now.”

  Big Al stepped out of the cloud and glared at Einstein. He  had eyes like a cobra. They were set into a crablike face with  a large retractable jaw that exposed rows of small pointed  fangs. His limbs were thick and muscular. They were covered  with leathery layers of pale orange skin. The six fingers on each  hand had nails as sharp as scalpels. In the middle of his tree  trunk of a torso were two oversized bellies. Both were cov-ered with rows of plates that jiggled when he spoke. “Say your  prayers, chubby,” Big Al bellowed at Einstein.

  “Look who’s talking,” he whispered to Roxie. “He looks like  he’s ready to give birth to twins.”

  She grabbed Einstein’s hand and ran. Big Al laughed at their  attempt to escape, but didn’t follow. As they reached the barn  door and tried to pass through, they were stopped dead in  their tracks, tumbling backward. Something hard and invisible  was blocking their path. It was the force field.

   “You’re both trapped,” Big Al roared.

  “So are you,” Roxie shouted back. “If we don’t get in that  spaceship, we’re all going to die. When the wormhole opens,  we will be sucked into space and torn to pieces.”

  Big Al seemed to find Roxie’s observation amusing. “Either  way we’re dead,” he replied as he started toward them. “Mucho  Fahn will kill all of us as soon as we land. The only difference  is I’m going to enjoy the look on your faces as I tear you limb  from limb.”

  They literally had their backs up against the wall and there  was nowhere to run. Big Al took his time as he approached,  savoring every moment of fear. There wasn’t much time left,  but he didn’t need much to do what he had in mind.

  “HEY, BONEHEAD!”

  Big Al turned around and saw Greeley standing behind him.  “I brought you a playmate. I hear it’s lonely up in space,” the  ghost said.

  Godzilla roared at the alien. She circled him, looking for an  advantage, and then charged. Big Al tried to fend her off, but  he was clearly outmatched. He grabbed two of her eyes and  pulled them off, which only seemed to infuriate the creature.  She bit down on his arm and shook him like a rag doll. Big Al  screamed in pain, but could not escape her viselike grip.

  “Now that’s something you don’t see every day,” Greeley  said to Roxie. He smiled as Godzilla tossed Big Al across the

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s head slammed against the spaceship with a loud  thump. “Bet that’s gonna leave a mark.”

  “I was wondering where you went,” Einstein said.

  “That big mutant spider was still alive,” Greeley said. “I  caught her chasing one of the campers and decided to kill two  birds with one stone.”

  “So you brought her back here,” Einstein said. “You know  something, Greeley? You’re pretty smart for an out-of-work  mailman.”

   “You’re not so bad yourself, Houdini.”

  “Oh, boys?” Roxie said, pointing at Einstein’s wristwatch.  “Could we finish this conversation somewhere else?”

  Einstein took Greeley and Roxie by the hand and they  formed a circle. “Beam us out of here, Scotty,” he said, smiling  at the ghost.

  “Aye, Captain.”

  Big Al watched as the three of them disappeared. He was  flat on his back, pinned beneath Godzilla. The female sank  its fangs deep into his chest, mercifully injecting him with a  powerful neurotoxin. Unable to move a muscle, he watched  helplessly as the top of the roof of the barn disappeared and  disintegrated before his eyes, revealing a dark, ominous funnel  forming directly overhead. As the dark hole grew wider, bolts  of lightning appeared, accompanied by loud claps of thunder.  He stared into the eye of the wormhole and shuddered. It was  a whirling dark black void extending into deep space, ominous  and forbidding. As the barn itself was pulled farther and far-ther into the wormhole, everything began to spin. With each  second, the rotation picked up speed, moving faster and faster.  The walls of the barn began to melt as the rotation increased  in velocity. “I really hate that kid,” Big Al muttered to himself  as his eardrums popped.