‘Evening, ladies, what seems to be the problem?’ Ash arrived at the barrier along with Rock Giant, Willows and Spook. Immediately, the fan-girls were all sweetness and light.
Damn, Ash looked hot tonight, in his butter-soft leathers and black Cuban-heeled boots, with his shirt unfastened except for the bottom two buttons. He held a towel in his hands that he was rubbing over his sweat-dampened hair.
To Ginny’s horror, instead of offering her a smile, his ice-blue gaze immediately settled on the trollop’s abundant décolletage. In fact, both Rock Giant’s and Iain Willows’s eyes zoomed in on it too, while Spook perfected his uninterested-elf pose. Ginny reckoned he was thinking about warm socks and cocoa too.
‘Nothing at all, we were just enjoying a bit of lively conversation,’ the girl told him, stretching out over the barrier to reach him.
‘Sounded extremely lively.’
‘Well, we’re all excited to be here.’ Her friends backed her up with murmurs of appreciation.
‘I bet you girls are up for a party?’
‘I am, if it’s taking place in your pants,’ someone behind Ginny quipped. Ash shrugged the remark off, but not the wandering hands that pawed at his chest and ass.
Ginny experienced an overwhelming urge to sever several limbs, more so when those hands started pawing at fastenings and rubbing over areas she considered her personal property.
‘Sign my ass,’ the girl asked. She turned in order to entice the guys by wiggling her derrière. She was wearing a minuscule skirt and a lurid pink thong. Rock Giant generously obliged, leaning over the barrier to reach. ‘What about the rest of you?’
Spook made a perfunctory mark. Ash signed the hereto unblemished cheek – making Ginny’s jaw ache, she had to grit her teeth so hard – which left only a smidgen of room for Iain’s moniker.
‘How about a kiss too?’
If Ash put his mouth anywhere near that bitch’s ass, she was going to give him a fucking earful, and to hell with who heard it.
‘It might smudge the ink,’ he remarked, giving a playful wink. ‘Guys,’ he called to the security posse, ‘why don’t you let these ladies in so we can all have a drink and get comfortable?’
Security moved the barrier, and someone put on some background noise.
Spook caught her arm as she made to follow the group over to a square of sofas with a table at the centre. ‘Let him be a minute, Ginny. He’s just doing what’s expected of him. Why not go and wait down the hall? He won’t be long. We’ll arrange a diversion, so he can slip away.’
‘Maybe, but I’m tired of sneaking around. What’s wrong with me staying here?’
‘Everything if you don’t want shit getting out. Dani and Xane are still about – they’ve only nipped out for a moment. If she sees you there are going to be heaps of questions asked.’
‘Then I’ll make sure she doesn’t see me.’
‘Hey, Spook! Stop hogging the pretty lady and bring her over here,’ Iain shouted, waving both hands at them, because obviously six man-hungry ladies weren’t enough to keep him entertained. To be fair, they were mostly huddled up against Ash and Rock Giant, apart from one girl who stared mournfully at Spook.
‘Fuck!’ Spook hissed, with his back to the table. ‘This is on your head, Ginny.’
‘If he’s only going to be a minute, how bad can it get?’
Pretty darn terrible was the honest answer, starting with Iain’s insistence on wedging her into a corner of a sofa next to him, well away from Ash and his fawning girlies. The girl who’d called her ‘fat arse’ was virtually on Ash’s knee, and Iain made it pretty obvious that he wanted Ginny in a similar position.
Ginny was used to handling men, but Iain was the sort of creepy manipulative prick she normally reserved a knee in the balls for. That was a little hard to pull off while seated, although, if he suggested any more places where he’d like to put his tongue, she’d find a way. ‘You sure we haven’t met before?’ he asked, leaning into her and running a hand through the long strands of her hair. ‘You seem awful familiar. Did we sleep together?’
In his dreams, maybe.
‘I think you have me mixed up with someone else.’
‘No, not over having met you. There aren’t many girls I’ve met with eyes that colour – hmm, sweet honey gold,’ he mused.
‘Whisky,’ Ash remarked, showing that despite appearances he was aware that she was present. ‘They’re like a fine malt.’
‘Aged,’ remarked the bitch.
‘I bet you’ve a kick like a fine malt too.’ Iain flicked back his red-streaked hair to see her better. He then settled his hand on her knee.
From the corner of her eye, Ginny watched Ash stir uncomfortably. The girl on his knee noticed it too, because she was suddenly straddled across his lap, with her hands on his face, demanding eye contact. You don’t need her, her body language said. I’ve got what you need right here. She clasped Ash’s hands, raised them to her breasts, clamped his palms right over her fat nipples and held them there.
‘I have met you,’ Iain said. His gaze flicked back and forth between her and Ash, or maybe that was her gaze. ‘You were backstage on the opening night. You turned me down for this klutz.’ He shot a look at Ash, who was glaring at her as if he were about to fire laser beams from his pupils. Then, smiling, Iain leaned in closer to Ginny. ‘I know a way to ensure you’re in his bed again tonight.’
Thank God, he was simply assuming she was here for a repeat performance, and hadn’t remembered that he’d also run into her in Paris, making a late-night exit from the tour bus.
Iain slid his hand further up her thigh, prompting Ginny to snap her own hand down on top of it.
‘Aw, come on babe, I can tell you’re the sort who likes to live a little bit wild. You should know Ash and I go way back. Why don’t you let the both of us show you a good time?’
‘Maybe because I’m not desperate and I don’t fancy you.’
‘You know you’re not going to get to him any other way. The guy’s got his hands real full right now. The only way he’s going to get free is if a friend steps in to offer some aid right now.’
‘Ash,’ Spook said on cue. ‘Time to wrap it up. We’ve a long drive ahead.’
Ginny knew for a fact they weren’t departing yet. The roadies were still loading equipment, and Ash had specifically told her they weren’t leaving until around 2 a.m. He’d planned for them to spend several hours together in his dressing room with the door bolted.
‘Sorry,’ Ash apologised, trying to rise at the same time as persuading the girl to move off his lap. ‘Looks as if our time’s up.’
‘I could join you,’ the girl said, still clinging on tight. ‘I ain’t got nothing on tomorrow, or the day after that.’ She was in his face, holding his jaw and turning it so that she ensured she had his complete attention. ‘I bet I know some really fun ways to make the journey pass quickly.’
‘That sounds very tempting, but –’
‘Shhh!’ The girl silenced him with her fingers. ‘You don’t want to make me cry now, do you?’
‘Of course not.’ He’d just about managed to stand now, but he was utterly failing to get her to take her hands off his bum. ‘I don’t like to make any woman cry.’
‘Then don’t say goodbye, say –’
She whispered the last part too quietly for Ginny to hear it, but the gist was obvious enough, as was the fact that Ash wasn’t saying no. ‘Fuck!’ she swore, suddenly on her feet as the queen bitch savaged his face with her poisonous kisses. She’d tear the little troll’s head off.
Ginny reached out, only for Iain to rear up behind her and snag her arm. ‘You won’t get him that way, I promise you that. Last-chance offer,’ he crooned into her ear, while he rubbed his fly against her rear.
The last thing she needed while she was watching her boyfriend being ugly-kissed by a tramp was to have a fuckwit poking her in the arse. ‘Back the fuck off,’ she snapped at him, causing everyone in the vicinity t
o gape at her. ‘Keep your fucking hands off me.’ Well, everyone except the person who really ought to have been paying attention, because he was too busy having his face sucked. ‘And fuck you too, Ash Gore.’
That at least did the trick. Ash pushed the girl to one side, so he could look at her. Frown lines furrowed his brow, and a pulse throbbed in his temple, but he had nothing for her. No apology, no explanation, just stone-cold silence.
‘Mate, you’re welcome to this one,’ Iain drawled. ‘She’s wacko.’
‘Ash, don’t let her spoil our fun,’ the trollop crooned. She stroked his arm as if he were hers and didn’t need to be bothered with some strange flaky lady.
Ash took a step forward, which only made her cling on harder.
Ginny held her arms rigidly by her sides, her fists clenched. A couple of words, some acknowledgement, that’s all he needed to do and he could fix things. They could forget about it and move on.
‘Don’t be jealous, babe.’ He spoke to her as if she were a stranger, while he held his hand out to her, as if he expected her to take it and croon like the rest of the harem he’d gathered. Was this the reason why he wanted to keep her at a distance, not to ensure their privacy but so he could still hang with the girls post-show, knowing she was safely out of the way?
Ginny stumbled backwards in her heels away from all of them. ‘Chill out, sweetheart. I’ll be with you shortly.’
She shook her head. No. No. He would not be with her shortly. But she didn’t open her mouth, because any attempt to speak would result in a scene that would go down in rock history. It wouldn’t be pretty. There’d probably be casualties.
He came closer. ‘Why don’t you go with Spook? He’ll show you the dressing room.’ Sure, his blue eyes were pleading, but she wasn’t biting.
‘Why don’t you go screw yourself?’
Ginny back stepped several more paces, then turned and stormed towards the nearest exit. She was not going to stand here and be treated like dirt, because she knew what happened when you took that sort of shit: you ended up being trodden into the carpet. She hit the bar on the fire exit, pushing it open and no doubt tripping a host of alarms, only to smack straight into one of the roadies. The blond one with the gravity-defying shorts that Dani had mentioned a couple of times when they’d spoken on the phone.
‘Hey.’ He put his hands on her shoulders to steady her. ‘Where’s the fire?’
‘Under Ash Gore’s arse if I have to speak to him again.’
‘Oh, OK then.’ He released her and stepped back a pace. ‘I won’t hold you up then, since he’s coming.’
Ginny didn’t wait to let Ash catch up but kept on walking. At the front of the arena she’d be able to catch a cab. Then it was just a matter of grabbing her bags and getting on the first available flight or ferry. A nice slow cruise across the North Sea sounded ideal right about now.
Chapter 12
‘Ginny. Ginny! For fuck’s sake, wait.’
She stopped just long enough to flip him the bird.
Luckily, he could move damn fast when he put his mind to it. It wasn’t difficult to catch her, given that she was tottering along in heels. Ash grabbed hold of her shoulder and swung her round to face him. ‘What the fuck are you doing, Ginny?’
‘What the fuck are you doing?’
‘You nearly blew everything,’ he said through clenched teeth. He’d had a coronary on the spot when he’d seen her hanging with those other girls backstage. It wasn’t safe for her to be in that position. Hadn’t he stated it strongly enough, that they were supposed to meet in his dressing room, where they’d be away from prying eyes? Christ, if Dani or Xane had seen her the fallout would have been huge. As it was, Iain had remembered her.
‘You’re the one who’s blown it. I’m not fucking doing this any more, Ash. No joke. I’m going home. Don’t bother to call, because I’m done with sneaking around.’
‘Please.’ He raised his hand as if to silence her before she said anything she might regret. ‘You do deserve more. I know it’s just tricky. It’s awkward right now. The band’s a mess and –’
‘Yeah,’ she drawled, cutting him off. ‘That argument would be just fine if that’s what this was about, but it’s not. Come on, Ash, explain it to me. How is it OK for some grubby little tart to massage your dick and lick your tonsils in front of everybody, but I’m not even allowed to be seen with you, let alone touch you in public?’
‘There was plenty touching happening in public earlier today.’
‘Not the same thing and you know it.’
‘Fine. People expect certain things from me. If I stop doing them entirely, they’re going to notice. You pretty much forced my hand, Ginny. If you’d gone to the dressing room as we’d discussed, that needn’t have happened. All I was planning on doing was talking to her for a couple of minutes, but you turned it into a catfight.’
‘So it’s my fault?’ She slapped his hands away when he reached out to her.
‘You made everyone suspicious, the way you were bristling. I had to allow her some liberties, otherwise they’d have known. Everyone would have known.’
She laughed into his face. ‘I don’t give a fuck about their suspicions. I don’t give a fuck if they know. Why can’t they know, Ash? Why does it have to be so hush-hush?’
‘You know why. I told you why.’
‘No, you gave me a reason. Now tell me the goddamned truth.’
Ash opened his mouth but failed to find the words to express himself. If this had been an essay and she’d given him a pen, then he might have been able to reason it out, but on the spot, when his heart was in his mouth and his guts were knotted at the prospect of her actually walking away, he knew he didn’t stand a chance of making her understand. Discomfort swaddled them both. The stiletto heels of her boots scraped against the tarmac as she shuffled uneasily. They’d been so damn happy this afternoon. He ought to have recognised that as a major warning sign. You’d think he’d learn from his mistakes. Apparently he’d learned nothing.
When she began to turn, he knew this was his last chance to make things right. He reached for her, but his fingers clawed empty air. ‘It’s too soon,’ he confessed. ‘I’m so sorry, but it’s too soon. I’ve been immolated before. I can’t open myself up to that again, not yet.’
She stopped, turned on the spot. There was no mercy in her face, but at least they’d moved forward, and she was listening. There was a chance he could make her understand.
‘By a girl or by the press?’
As if she didn’t already know. The inevitable press involvement would make everything worse, but that wasn’t the heart of the problem.
‘We’ve all been burned, Ash. Do you think you’re the only one who’s ever sustained an emotional scar the size of the Mariana Trench? Ash, I’ve had more than my share of fucked-up relationships. The only way to get over them is to keep moving forward. Shutting yourself down isn’t the answer. You have to let other people in, other possibilities arise.’
‘That’s what I’m doing.’
‘It’s not,’ she insisted. ‘You say you love me, claim we’re a couple, but that’s not how you treat me. You’re using me in the same way you did all the groupies you’ve been screwing for years, like I’m a plaything you can get out when you fancy, keep happy with an orgasm and then lock away when it’s inconvenient. It’s bollocks, Ash. That’s not the sort of relationship I want with you. Look at Xane and Dani – when they’re together you know exactly how goddamn right they are for one another because it’s written all over their faces. It’s welded into their body language.’
Gaze lowered to the wet tarmac underfoot, he slowly shook his head. ‘I can’t do that. Maybe in time, but not yet.’
She crossed her arms as her lips pinched together. Hurt screamed at him from the centres of her whisky-gold eyes, but he refused to pretend. In time he’d absolutely offer her everything, every single part of himself, but he couldn’t do it all at once, right now. At least, not while
on tour, when the consequences if it went nuclear would be so catastrophic.
‘If we could lock ourselves away in a cabin for six months and be normal, then I’d do my best to give you what you want, but I can’t open myself to such risk right now. The situation with the band is too volatile already. I need to stay sane. A few of us have to be, and it’s pretty much down to me and Paul at the moment.’
Steve Matlock was gone, Elspeth suicidal. Iain wasn’t the lifesaver they needed. Instead he was displaying piranha-like qualities, ready to skin the flesh off their bones if the opportunity arose. He’d forgotten how fucking mercenary the man could be. Then there was Xane’s perpetual melodrama. Even the normally resilient Spook wasn’t quite himself at the moment. He’d been mooching around looking constipated ever since they’d remastered their first track as a tour anthem and tribute to Steve. Not that Ash thought grief was the issue. Basically, the bus was a big kettle of mess.
‘Please understand that I want you every minute of every day, but I need you to be separate from the circle of band politics and screw-ups. I need you to be my rock, my anchor. The safe harbour when everything gets screwy.’ In the same way that the band would be if things went wrong with her.
The night breeze ruffled her hair as she shook her head, blowing the long strands across her face. ‘I’m not cut out to be anyone’s anchor. I like things wild and rocky, at least then I know I’m living. I don’t want to passively sail through life, Ash. Give me storms and great waves, and I’ll give you the loyalty you need, combined with intense passion.’
‘I can’t.’ He reached for her hand, so that he could clasp and hold it close to his chest. ‘I swear, Ginny, you’re everything I want, but you need to respect my boundaries.’
‘What about what I want? It’s damn lonely traipsing about Europe on my own, knowing I could be travelling with you, being with you, sleeping late and making long, glorious love to you. Instead, I’m constantly one step behind, wedged onto another bit of public transport, and if I want to see you more than once every few days, I have to stand among the crowd at one of your gigs and watch you suck face with every little tart who wants a piece of you.’
All Fired Up Page 9