A Sea of Smoke: A Dark Romance (A War of Hearts Book 2)

by Karen Lynn

  It didn’t take very long before she broke down and fled the condo. As soon as Logan heard the door crash behind her, he let out a loud sigh of relief and peeked out from under the blanket.

  “Fucking cunt.” If he wasn’t in so much pain he could’ve died laughing.

  KRISTEN/JAKE

  The room was bathed in darkness, only the muffled sound of Jake’s breaths filling the air. Tiptoeing along, Kristen took extra care to avoid waking him, but a slippery substance sent her sailing off balance into a chair.

  “What the fuck was that?” Startled, it came out much louder than intended. She swept her foot cautiously along the floor until it found the beer can. Right as she stooped down to pick it up, Jake switched on the light.

  “Sorry about that. You okay?”

  “What happened? I almost killed myself.”

  “I was pissed.” He shrugged.

  “Ugh!” Eager to walk away, she broke from his gaze. His hand shot out to hold her back.

  “Baby, please don't walk away from me again. I didn't come down here to fight. I need you.” Screw it. If I have to beg, I don’t care. I can’t take this anymore!

  She didn’t have to consider his words, the undeniable love in his face gave her the guarantee she needed. “I do too. I hate fighting with you.”

  With one quick movement, he lifted her up into his arms.

  Once in bed it was like they'd never been apart. When their lips eventually separated, their bodies blended into each other.

  “When can we make love again?” he asked, breathless.

  “I won't know for sure until I see the doctor next week.” She took in the wave of disappointment spreading across his face. When he closed his eyes and laid back in defeat, it destroyed her.

  “I don't wanna wait.” The smoldering desire in her eyes brought him to his knees.

  “I don't wanna hurt you, baby,” he whispered between kisses. “Stop me if I do, okay?”

  She didn't answer, it was too late for words.

  CHAPTER 15

  SATURDAY, WEEK 12

  LOGAN

  Nick was looking for Logan, his constant barrage of texts and voice messages, really getting on his nerves. Logan warded him off the best he could, repelled by the idea of revealing what had happened. But it didn’t dissuade Nick. For some unfathomable reason he continued harassing him with questions about how it was going with Kristen. At a point where he couldn’t stand it any longer, Logan ended up answering his call.

  “What the hell is going on with you Logan? Did you work it out with her or not?”

  Yeah, we worked it out. I almost killed her, but I didn't. Aren’t you proud?

  The truth wouldn't work. He had to get it through Nick’s thick head once and for all.

  “It’s over. That baby sealed her deal with that asshole. I’m done trying. Now why don’t you shut the fuck up about it?” He took a deep breath, leaning back in his chair, savoring the moment. He didn’t give a damn if Nick was offended, pissed off or mad as hell. Not anymore.

  For a few uncomfortable minutes, Nick was silent. Then he surprised Logan.

  “So I guess that means you’re free to take care of business?”

  Logan’s head was in the clouds. “Yeah. Set me up. I’ll do whatever. Send me to New York. I don’t give a fuck!” It wasn’t him talking, he didn’t recognize his own voice. Every inch of his body blazed with pain, his head about to explode. What the hell am I doing?

  Nick was flabbergasted and thrilled, but it didn’t last long. Before he could get out another word, Logan came to his senses and told him it would have to wait for a while. He was so run down, he feared he was having another bout of the flu. The horrendous body aches he was actually experiencing made it realistic. He felt like he was going to die. Nick groaned then seemed to accept it, urging him to let him know as soon as he was up to it. Logan sighed with relief. There was a slim chance he would follow up by coming to the condo. Nick hated being sick.

  After he hung up on Nick, it was impossible to unwind. He just couldn’t shut his mind down. I should've seen it coming and fought back. Even though he’s a big savage, I could’ve taken him on. The whole fucking thing is Kristen's fault for not controlling him. She probably doesn’t even know what he did! I should tell her, she’ll feel sorry for me and come over. No, she'll see Jake’s a monster and leave him.

  As he became more and more disoriented, his scrambled thoughts collided in his brain. He couldn't hold back any longer. Gina left him. He was all alone, on the verge of dying from agonized loneliness. He needed Kristen.

  As soon as she answered, he knew he had to do something fast. He sensed she was about to end the call.

  “Krissy, please don't hang up.” He hated pleading, but had no other choice.

  From the sound of his voice, she knew he was in pain. Jake was out for a run.

  She buried her head in her hands and sighed. “Logan, I know what happened. After what you did to me, I can’t feel sorry for you anymore.” He was silent. “Are you gonna live or not?”

  “No, I'm hurt really bad. He really went off on me. He's a fucking maniac! Why'd you let him do that?” Every cry, move, breath, added to his torture.

  “I didn't let him do anything Logan, I had no idea. Tell me what happened.” She lifted her face, the possibility of knowing the truth, invigorating.

  “He was waiting for me across from the apartment. I was walking on the beach minding my own business when he came out of nowhere and jumped me.”

  The instant she heard his words, she went rigid.

  So, I was right. Jake did hunt him down. He lied to me, sneaking behind my back fully aware how much I opposed him attacking Logan. Okay, I was dishonest in the past, but that doesn’t make his actions justifiable. Worse yet, all he has are suspicions at best, that Logan hurt me. This only proves that what he did to Logan was strictly an act of revenge for Ray.

  As she listened to Logan’s anguished breaths, she couldn’t prevent his suffering from affecting her. Why is it every time I tell myself it’s the last time, it never is?

  “Are you sure you didn't just run into him? I know you were with your girlfriend, don't lie, Logan.”

  “Gina? You know what she is. And he's lying to you. He followed me!” He cleared his throat, his voice fading.

  The sudden numbness provoked by his revelation couldn’t be ignored. Neither could the exhilarating feeling of satisfaction that superseded it. At last he failed to manipulate her and get under skin.

  “Logan, I can't help you. If Jake finds out...” She stopped, regretting her words. “I told you we're together now. He promised me he wouldn't go after you. I even tried to hide what you did, but I think he could tell. You really messed me up, Logan this time! My eyes were all bloodshot, my throat is bruised. I'm still in pain too. What the hell is wrong with you? Whatever happened to you is your own fault.”

  The whole thing alive in her head, made her hyperventilate. It was so quiet, her own harsh breaths were startling. Thinking she heard Jake approaching, she checked the window. “Just rest, you'll be fine. It's not the first time you got beat up for being a dick.”

  Except this time, it was more than that. He was a murderer. And he was very close to being murdered himself. The irony had her close to laughter but the severity overpowered the urge.

  “Well you added to it, my balls are still killing me. I'm sorry I hurt you. You know I am. I never meant to.”

  “Wait a minute Logan, it's not just about me, is it? You should be sorry about everything.”

  “But I am Krissy, about everything. I told you, you don't believe me? It was self-defense, you know me, you know that—”

  “—That you're not a killer? I thought I knew you, really, I did. But now…” She shook her head in disbelief. “My life has become a living hell.” She hadn’t meant to say it out loud, but it escaped her lips.

  “No! Don't say that!”

  “Logan, I'm sorry about everything too, I really am. I want to
believe you.” She exhaled deeply. She couldn’t allow her resolve to weaken. Her voice cracked. “Listen, I have to get ready to see the baby. Please don't provoke anything else.”

  “I didn't provoke it Krissy! Your asshole boyfriend did! How do you know it's his baby anyway? It's not like he was the only one besides me!”

  “Stop it Logan! We did a paternity test, that's how. Why don't you just find someone else and leave me alone? It's not like you were ever loyal to me!”

  With difficulty he raised his head from his hands, the stinging pain above his eyes worsening. “That's not gonna happen and you know it.”

  The bitterness in his voice had her head swimming. She needed to keep it peaceful somehow, or else he could retaliate against Jake, and she couldn’t allow that.

  “Look, maybe we can be…” She couldn't finish, it wasn't an option. We could never just be friends. That was already proven many times. It is too dangerous.

  “Yeah, right!” His laughter died out from the influx of stabbing pain. Every word increased his discomfort and it came through in the grittiness of his voice. “When you get tired of him, and you will, maybe you’ll get lucky and I'll be waiting for you, Krissy.”

  She blocked out his voice, but the tears still swelled in her eyes. If only I could snuff out every single drop of love I ever had for him, my life would be so much easier.

  She had to—it was the only option.

  “Goodbye Logan. Take care of yourself.”

  “Remember what we always said to each other?” He could hear her muffled sobs and couldn’t hold back the rush of desire. “No goodbyes, Krissy.” His whispered words dissolved in the air, as the line went dead.

  He didn't move. He couldn't. Somehow, I have to convince her I am destroyed by what I did to her, by everything I ever did to hurt her. That without her, I am nothing. I won’t accept it. Not now. Not ever.

  JAKE

  The five-mile run along the beach wore him out but he was still encouraged. Making love the previous night helped solidify their love. He was careful, she didn't complain, everything was back on track. They would go to see the baby, then the apartment, and take it from there. He was alive with a new-found optimism he hadn't felt for a long time. As long as Logan was out of the picture, everything would be fine. Just like with his stepfather, there was no guilt to overcome. He wouldn't have it any other way.

  As soon as he stepped into the motel room, the sense that something was wrong hit him. She was busy getting ready to leave for the hospital, and held back when he hugged her. The recent revitalized passion and affection was replaced by coldness, but he refused to let it slip away.

  Persisting, he followed her. “Hey, I know I'm sweaty, but that never stopped us before.” He laughed, nuzzling her neck.

  “Yeah, well, I guess I'm overly sensitive now.” She jerked her face away.

  “So am I.” He pouted, letting her go.

  She continued dressing.

  “What's wrong?”

  “Nothing, Jake. We're late. Are you showering?” She couldn't look at him.

  “After you tell me what's wrong with you.” She stood in front of the dresser mirror. He planted himself in between, blocking her view.

  “Seriously, baby, it's nothing. Can you move? I can't see.”

  He ignored her, pulling her into him, locking her in with his legs.

  “Then prove it,” he demanded, kissing her.

  With a deep sigh, she forced Logan's words out of her mind.

  She was lost in his lips, his strong body pulsating into her, the comforting feel of his roaming hands, tantalizing her. She was lost in him, and could only hope it wouldn't prevent her from getting a clear bill of health from the doctor.

  * * *

  When the pediatrician told them Alex was better and fit to go home on Monday afternoon, Kristen couldn’t believe her ears. After giving her a pat of reassurance, the doctor scratched his balding head and left them. She bounced into Jake’s arms with such jubilance it actually unsteadied him. He could see the on-duty nurse in the NICU giggling as she brought Alex to them.

  “You want him?” He laughed as her fingers clamped into his back.

  She glowed with an exuberance he'd never seen in her before. If it wasn’t due to his son, he was sure he'd be burning with jealousy.

  “We need to pick up the crib, stroller, toys, bottles, and all his other stuff,” she rattled on, out of breath.

  “Let's take care of that apartment first. We need a place to put it in!” Jake gently caressed the baby's head with one hand, the other firmly on her back. “Are you happy, baby?”

  “Very! You don't even know!” It was hard to believe an hour earlier she was on the verge of a depression induced meltdown. “He's so gorgeous! We're very lucky.”

  “I know.” But did he really though? He couldn’t put his finger on it, something was amiss.

  “You never told me about the deal with Henry,” Kristen whispered as she rocked Alex to sleep. His bottle almost drained, his eyelids became heavy, then fluttered closed.

  Jake smiled, his eyes twinkling. “We've been busy, haven't we? I told him I'd start next week after we get Alex settled in.”

  “Well, what do you have to do? Tell me!”

  “He has two restaurants he wants murals for, maybe some window art paintings. Baby, he's talking $30,000 or more, depending on size and quantity. Then, listen to this, he wants to re-decorate his house in the Keys and a Miami Beach townhouse. He’s talking at least six paintings, maybe a mural or some glass art. Holy shit! I couldn't believe it!”

  “Wow, that's awesome! That's a lot of work, though isn’t it? Do you have deadlines?” Remembering the law office, she shuddered.

  “Naw, not really. The faster I paint, the faster we get money. But that's not it baby, he's a big investor down here. Franky said he's looking into a bar and the restaurants have bars too, so if we need extra money, hopefully I could work there. Then you don't have to worry about going back to work.” He grabbed her hand.

  She pondered the idea, unsure if she agreed. “Let's see, eventually I'll want to, at least part time. Alicia said there's tons of law firms down here. I may have to brush up on my Spanish though, but she’s ready to help.”

  “Then again, when we have another baby...” His eyes were bright and dreamy.

  “Another one? Let me see how I do with him first please!” She laughed. “What about Oregon? How long would all this work keep us here?”

  “It depends, six months, maybe more. Whatever you want baby. If you wanna stay, I'm cool with it. We can visit my mom, or we can move, whatever. The important thing is we have enough money. I know you're used to it. I want you to be happy.” He flushed, a bashful expression on his face.

  “I told you a million times, I don't need a lot of money. All I need is you and Alex. I have no problem working either. Even though I bitch about the jackass attorneys, I do like it.” She smiled up at him.

  “What? The work or the attorneys?”

  “The legal work! Cut it out already. No more jealousy, remember?” Landing a playful slap on his muscular arm, her goal was to hit and run.

  He held onto her, happy to change the subject.

  “I may need your help. You could paint and sketch and we can find a gallery here to sell our stuff. Maybe you can try sculpting. I really think you'd love it. Wouldn't you want to get into art again Kris?”

  She stared at him, in awe. “Yes, Jake. Thank you.”

  “For what?”

  “For believing in me.”

  It came as a total shock and all he could do at that moment, was stare into the distance.

  LOGAN

  The pain meds, booze, coke, all blended together, forming that magical potion that set his mind in limbo and freed his soul. Maybe for a little while he could forget the debilitating pain and rise out of the sea of depression into soothing numbness. As long as he didn't look at the purplish yellow bruise around his stomach or his face with the hideous black ey
e, he could pretend it never happened.

  For now, I’ll just pretend I still have Kristen in my life. Pretend her savage boyfriend doesn’t exist. An unexpected sigh of contentment was all he needed to get lost in the fantasy. At least for a few minutes.

  Gina hadn't texted or called since he dumped her. One day and counting. It was a huge weight off of his chest. Now he could concentrate on what really mattered.

  It wasn’t going to be an easy task. The disillusionment threatened to re-surface as he peered over the balcony ledge. Although it was difficult, he held it at bay, focusing instead on the grayish-blue clouds looming over the ocean. Turbulent, majestic waves pounded against the shore. If he listened closely, he could hear the whispered chirping of birds off in the distance. A momentary feeling of peace and tranquility permeated the air.

  Reliving his conversation with Kristen, he knew there was no chance of reuniting unless Jake was out of the picture. When he took a deep breath, the salt air stung his lungs. Turning in slow motion, he walked back inside.

  It had been a long time since he opened the safe. Up until then it hadn't seemed necessary. The .45 caliber pistol felt strange in his hand. He moved his fingers along it, admiring its elegance and beauty. A long time ago it felt so familiar. Probably right around the time he met Nick. As their dealings picked up intensity, it became more of a necessity than a luxury. Now, it felt foreign. Almost like a luxurious treat. A means to an end. What did it matter? He'd killed before, and that was without a real reason. This time it was different. And he was a real man now. With his adrenalin racing, arm steady, he held it up, aiming at the wall. Instantly an invigorating feeling of power and control overcame him. He hadn't felt a moment like this in ages. Sighing, he sank to the floor, placed the gun on his lap, and smiled.

  Who was it that said I’m a pussy anyway?

  KRISTEN/JAKE

  It was a quaint little guest house surrounded by a lush garden and several tall palm trees. The master bedroom and living room were fully furnished. The kitchen had newer appliances, a big oak table and plenty of cabinet space. They even supplied a flat screen television, which helped since Jake sold everything before he left New York. The air conditioners sitting on the window ledges of each bedroom were a little old and noisy, but they served their purpose.