Blessings From the Father

by Michelle Larks

  “Mari, what’s wrong?” Carson asked her anxiously.

  Mariah wet her lips. “Carson, my granny lied to me. She did know my father.”

  “How do you know?” Carson asked the question, although he knew why.

  “I read it in my journal. He was in Vietnam with my grandfather. All this time, Granny knew and she lied to me. I don’t understand why she would do that. If she lied about this, what else has she lied about?”

  “Are you sure?” Carson asked stalling for time.

  “I’m positive. I feel betrayed. If she knew him why didn’t she let him come around me? The only reason I can think of is that he raped Cassie. Nothing else makes any sense.”

  “I’m going to come over there,” Carson promised.

  “For what?” Mariah’s voice rose hysterically. “I am probably the product of a rape. God, I feel so dirty.”

  “Sit tight. I’m on my way.” Carson clicked off his phone.

  Mariah turned off the light in the living room. She sat enveloped in the darkness waiting for Carson to return her life to normalcy. She needed his help to escape the nightmare that engulfed and held firmly to her soul.

  Chapter Thirty-four

  Carson pulled into Mariah’s driveway and Raquel pulled in behind him. Alex was with her. Carson exited his car and waited for them to do the same. After greeting the pair, he asked, “What are you doing here?”

  “I have some good news for you. I can’t wait to tell you and Mariah about my night,” Raquel boasted. The trio walked up the steps.

  “God knows I can use some good news right about now,” Carson remarked agitatedly. He had no idea what he was going to say to Mariah. “Look, this might not be a good time to visit Mariah. She’s learned some shocking news.”

  “Like what?” Raquel asked. She cocked her head to the side.

  “I’m not at liberty to say. Can’t you wait and tell us your news in the morning?”

  “Well, actually it’s about you. I found out who robbed your office,” Raquel told Carson smugly.

  “Really?” Carson raised his eyebrow. Raquel held his interest.

  “Yes, really. I overheard a conversation in a bar tonight.” She pulled out her cell phone. “And I recorded it. You’ll never guess who was behind this.”

  “I really need to talk to Mari, Raquel. Can this wait until the morning?”

  “You should listen to her, man,” Alex urged his friend. “This is the real deal.”

  “I understand, but I really need to get to Mari. Raquel, I promise I’ll talk to you first thing in the morning. Would you guys just leave? Mari and I need to talk.” His voice cracked. Carson’s lips were a thin slash.

  “Humph, talk about ungrateful.” Raquel snorted. “If that’s what you want, sure. I’ll call you in the morning.” She looked at Alex. “I can tell when I’m not wanted. Let’s go.”

  Raquel and Alex returned to the car. Seconds later they pulled out of the driveway.

  Carson rang the doorbell. It seemed to take Mariah forever to answer the door. Carson was about to use the key Mariah had given him for emergencies, when she finally opened the door.

  “You look like death warmed over,” Carson told her after he entered the house. They sat on the sofa. He took her cold hands in his.

  “I feel numb,” Mariah whispered. “I should have known nothing good would come of associating with Harold Ellison. I know something bad happened. That’s why Granny pretended she didn’t know him. He probably raped Cassie. I know it in my heart. That would explain why she’s addicted to drugs.”

  “Now, babe, don’t get ahead of yourself. You don’t really know what happened. I think you need to talk to your grandmother.”

  Mariah pulled her hands away from Carson. “What do you mean? Of course I know something bad happened. It’s obvious from the way my grandmother has been acting. She didn’t want to move here with me. She said she didn’t know Harold Ellison and she did.”

  “Did you read that?” Carson asked. He was in a quandary because he knew the truth and he wanted to tell Mariah so badly.

  “I didn’t. But I know that’s what the journal is going to say if I keep reading.” She looked at him with new eyes. “Do you know what happened, Carson? If you do, then you need to tell me.”

  “I, ah, I can’t say, Mari,” he managed to say. His face looked grim and Carson was so torn between a promise he had made to a man who was like a father to him, and the woman he loved. When Harold confided in Carson, he made him promise the information would stay between the two men. Later, Harold relented and told Carson that he could talk to Reverend Cambridge if he needed someone to talk to after he was gone.

  “Can’t or won’t say?” she pressed him. Mariah felt doubly betrayed. She couldn’t believe Carson wouldn’t help her.

  “I made a promise to Mr. Ellison,” he said helplessly with his hand held out. “I think it’s best you keep reading or talk to your grandmother.”

  “You know what? I thought we were a couple and I could talk to you about anything. If you feel like you can’t talk to me about this because of a promise you made to a man who was probably a rapist, then I think you should go.”

  “Mari, you’re being hasty,” Carson said cajolingly. “I will be there for you. I love you. I’m conflicted because I know Mr. Ellison wanted you to learn what happened in his own way. He didn’t know we would ever meet. I promised him I wouldn’t share what happened with anyone except Reverend Cambridge. As much as I want to I can’t interfere with his wishes.”

  “I can’t believe you,” Mariah shouted. She glared at him. “You know what? Go.” She pointed to the door. “Just go.”

  “I don’t want to leave you here in this state of mind. I’m not going anywhere,” Carson said vehemently. “You can scream, yell, or whatever you want to do. I’m not going.”

  Mariah gritted her teeth. “Do what you want. I’m going to bed.” She snatched the journal off the table and raced up the stairs. She slammed the door shut.

  What a day, Carson thought. When it rains it pours. But like the Father says, weeping endureth for a night, but joy will come in the morning. I hope that’s true, because we definitely need joy. He bowed his head. “Father, we need you here tonight. Mariah is hurting. She’s forgotten to lean on you. Comfort her Lord, and bring her peace, in the Savior’s name. Amen.”

  Carson closed his eyes and leaned against the back of the sofa. His cell phone chirped. He looked at it, clicked it on, and said, “What’s up, Alex? I thought I told you and Rocki I’d talk to you in the morning.”

  “Man, I know you said that. But Rocki is right. What she had to tell you, you need to hear right away.”

  “For some reason unknown to me, you and Rocki seem to think you know what’s best for me,” Carson complained. Then he glanced upstairs. He knew Mariah wouldn’t be returning downstairs anytime soon. “Go ahead, tell me what happened.”

  Alex filled Carson in on what had transpired earlier. Carson was thunderstruck. When Alex finished talking all Carson could say was, “Tell me you didn’t just tell me that Lola set up the robbery. I know I heard you wrong.”

  “No, you heard me right. The beauty is that Rocki managed to record Javier bragging about robbing you. Can you believe Lola involved her own cousin? After we left you, Rocki and I went to police headquarters and gave the information to the police. They plan to pay a visit to Javier immediately. I didn’t think Javier had it in him to do something like that.”

  “You know what? He came to me and asked me if I could help him out, a few weeks before the robbery. He was probably casing my office then so he could rob me. I can’t believe it.” Carson felt dazed. He opened and closed his eyes a couple of times.

  “Believe it, brother man. I heard the recording myself,” Alex informed him.

  “And, he said Lola put him up to it?” Carson felt totally disheartened.

  “Yep, he said that too. You know Lola, she can be manipulative. She’s been tripping hard since you got t
ogether with Mari.”

  “I know but to stoop that low is foul. I had a feeling the police were going to try to pin the robbery on Michael. Thank God the evidence points to his innocence. So something good came out of Rocki’s discovery. We know some police are capable of changing circumstances so they can close a case.”

  “You’re right it could have gone bad for Michael. What are you going to do about Lola? Your babies’ momma could end up in jail.” Alex snickered at the thought.

  “I don’t know. The matter could be out of my hands. If Lola pulled a stunt like this, then maybe I need to reassess her having joint custody of the girls. This is really going to be a problem.”

  “Yeah, you’re right about that. Who would have thought your ex-wife would become a con.” Alex snickered.

  “That’s not funny,” Carson complained. “Since Raquel has Javier on tape, her goose is cooked. Trust me when I tell you that she is not going to walk away without getting her hands dirty, one way or another,” Carson promised his friend.

  “So what’s up with Mariah? Is everything okay?”

  “At this point things are tense between us. She’s reading the journals. Remember I told you that Mr. Ellison left a bunch of them. I knew there was a chance her finding out the truth could affect our relationship. I just hope she can cope with everything that happened. Right now, she’s in a bad way.” Carson yawned. “Look, I’ve got to go. I’ll holler at you in the A.M.”

  “You do that, bro. I’ll talk to you tomorrow.”

  The men ended the call.

  Carson seethed with anger. “Father, forgive me. I just want to run to Lola’s house and confront her. Knowing Lola like I know her, she will just deny, deny, deny. Help me to do the right thing for the girls, because they come first. But I can’t let them stay with someone so unstable. Lord, help me to do the right thing.”

  Several hours later, Carson hadn’t heard a peep from Mariah. He pulled his jacket around his shoulders and went to sleep.

  Upstairs, Mariah continued to read. Finally, she fell asleep with the journal clutched in her hand.

  When she awakened the next morning, the aroma of coffee wafted through the air. She felt aggrieved that Carson was still in her house. Mariah hurriedly showered and dressed. The first order of business for her was to talk to Rosemary.

  She pulled her hair back, twisted a headband around her hair, and ran downstairs. “You’re still here.” She scowled at Carson. He sat at the kitchen table with a mug of coffee in front of him, and another cup across from him.

  “Good morning to you too,” he commented. “Look, I don’t like to argue. I’m sorry you feel the way you do. I think you should keep reading the journals and see what Mr. Ellison has to say.”

  “Mr. Ellison can kiss my butt. I’m going to see Granny. She knows a lot more than what she has let on. Today she is going to answer my questions. I won’t take no for an answer.” Mariah looked stony. Carson knew that Rosemary was in for a tough time.

  “I would counsel you to go easy on your grandmother. She was doing what she thought was best at the time. We all make mistakes. Try to be like Christ and forgive.”

  Mariah’s eyes widened. “You’re right, all of us make mistakes. I’ve asked my grandmother point blank about my father for years. So she had plenty of time to come up with an explanation after all this time.”

  “Okay, just try to keep an open mind. Can you do that?”

  “I can’t make any promises,” Mariah told him truthfully. “I’m headed to Chicago, so lock the door on your way out.”

  “I will.” Carson stood up and tried to hold her in his arms, but Mariah pulled away.

  “Good-bye, Carson,” she told him. Then, she walked to the closet, put on her coat, and proceeded to leave the house.

  Mariah’s thoughts were all over the page as she drove to Altgeld Garden. She rehearsed in her mind what she would say to Rosemary. Using side streets to avoid rush hour traffic, and speeding, Mariah arrived at Rosemary’s house twenty minutes later.

  Rosemary was locking her front door when Mariah pulled up. When she turned around, Mariah was pulling into a parking spot. Mariah exited the car and rushed to Rosemary’s door. “Granny, I need to talk to you and I need to talk to you now.”

  Rosemary’s stomach dropped to her feet. Her day of reckoning had arrived and there was no turning back.

  Chapter Thirty-five

  After the women went inside Rosemary’s house, she asked Mariah weakly, “Are you hungry? I can make you breakfast.” She set her purse on the kitchen table.

  “No, I’m not hungry. But, I do have questions for you,” Mariah informed her grandmother. She took a journal out of her purse.

  “Oh, that,” Rosemary said. She sat tensely on a kitchen chair and faced Mariah. She could see her granddaughter was distraught. Tendrils of hair stuck out of the headband around Mariah’s head. Dark circles enclosed the young woman’s eyes. Mariah’s complexion looked ashen, like she hadn’t slept all night. The sparkle had gone out of Mariah’s spirit.

  Rosemary closed her eyes and prayed for the Lord to help her. The confrontation with Mariah was nothing like she’d imagined. She knew her granddaughter was feeling hurt, and instead of alleviating the pain, Rosemary was going to add to it.

  “I’ve been reading Harold Ellison’s journals, and imagine my surprise when I came upon an entry of his about being in Vietnam and his good friend Jojo. Jojo was Granddaddy wasn’t he?”

  At first, Rosemary couldn’t say anything. She numbly nodded her head.

  “So all these years, you knew who my father was. You knew he lived in Hammond and you never told me? Why, Granny?”

  Rosemary fidgeted in her seat, and blindly groped the plastic tablecloth. “I didn’t know how to tell you, Mariah. For so many years, I’ve tried to tell you in my mind, but I couldn’t ever get the words out.”

  “Why? Did he rape Cassie? Is that the reason why? If that’s the case, I can understand your not telling me.” Mariah’s hand fluttered to her chest. “But I’m a woman now. I know bad things happen in life.”

  “If only it were that simple,” Rosemary moaned as her eyes filled with tears. “I went crazy after Joseph was declared MIA. I had lost my reason for living, and I shut down. Cassie was always moody. She suffered terribly after we got the word about Joseph. Cassie needed me to lean on. But, I couldn’t help her, I couldn’t help myself. Luckily, Alma was around to help me pick up the pieces. There is no excuse for me shutting everyone out, but I did.”

  Mariah patted Rosemary’s hand. “I understand, you had lost the love of your life.”

  Rosemary dipped her head. “I was just going through the motions when Harold came to visit me. He helped me get over my depression . . .” Rosemary faltered.

  “I would think so. From his writing he was fond of Granddaddy. Harold wrote he was like a brother to him.”

  “That was true and things went wrong. They were so good for a while and then they went terribly wrong.” Rosemary sighed.

  “What do you mean? Oh, you mean, when he raped Cassie, don’t you? I figured that must be what happened.” Mariah tried to console her grandmother.

  Rosemary seemed to shrink in her seat. Her eyes dropped to the table and she closed her eyes. “No, Harold didn’t rape Cassie. He wasn’t that type of man. I really don’t know any other way to tell you the truth of the matter. I love you, Mari; I always have from the moment I laid eyes on you. I just wasn’t thinking clearly back then and I made the situation more difficult than it had to be. I didn’t want you to go through life possibly being disrespected because of mistakes I made.” Rosemary’s breathing became labored. She looked into Mariah’s eyes; her own eyes were teary. “Cassie is not your mother. I am.”

  Mariah felt as if the world had flipped upside down. It was quiet in the room; the only sound was the ticktock of the clock. Mariah drew her body tight and held herself rigidly. She said in a thin, reedy voice, “What did you say?” She peered at her grandmother wit
h eyes as wide as saucers, stunned, as if she’d never seen Rosemary before.

  “I said I’m your mother,” Rosemary croaked out. She dropped her gaze to the table.

  “But, I thought . . . Oh no, you were with Harold?”

  “Yes,” Rosemary whispered. “I had an affair with Harold. He helped fill the void that Joseph’s absence left.”

  “Granny, how could you?” Mariah cried. “I don’t believe you. You denied me as your child, and perpetrated the lie that I was Cassie’s child. Why?” the young woman asked hysterically. Tears streamed from her eyes.

  “It was the most stupid thing I’ve ever done. Everybody knew Joseph was MIA. How was I going to explain having a baby? What if Joseph came back?” Rosemary tried to explain.

  “So, what? Things like that have happened before especially here in the Garden. It wasn’t the worst thing that could have happened.”

  “It was back then. But when I look at things now, I should have just claimed you as my baby, and let the chips fall where they may.”

  “How did Cassie get involved?” Mariah asked. Like the pieces of a puzzle fitting together, the truth explained Cassie’s treatment of Mariah.

  “I begged Cassie to say she was the one pregnant. One day, Harold and I were careless, Cassie came home early. She went crazy, and she’s never been the same since then. I knew she loved me and would do anything for me. She didn’t want to go along with the lie, but I begged her to and eventually she did.”

  “This is so ugly and sordid. No wonder Cassie hates me. I am a double reminder to her of your infidelity and having to claim me as her child. Granny, you could have handled the situation differently.”

  Rosemary’s ears clogged. Her chest felt tight, she couldn’t catch her breath. “I’m sorry, Mari. I never meant to hurt you.” She gasped. Rosemary keeled over and fell from the chair.