Under the Wire: Bad Boys Undercover

by HelenKay Dimon

  If only it were that simple.

  If only everything that happened between them before hadn’t brought them to this emotional place.

  She scooted over, just a bit closer to him, and put a hand on his thigh right above his knee. “First of all, I do trust you.”

  “With what?”

  She didn’t understand the question. “Trust is . . . you know what I mean. The word has a logical definition.”

  He had her stumbling over her words and doubting her hearing. The man could strip away all of her defense mechanisms in two seconds flat.

  “It’s not really one thing.” He didn’t sound angry. He looked at her as if he genuinely expected her to have a rational answer. “Do you trust me to keep you safe? Trust me not to physically hurt you? Trust me not to cheat on you? Which is it? Am I failing in one of those categories or is it something else?”

  “I trust you in all of those ways.” For her, trust was a much bigger concept. This all-encompassing thing that included her mind and body.

  “Do you trust me to tell you the truth? Because sometimes I can’t. Not all of it.” He slipped his fingers into her hair. Wrapped a strand around his thumb. “That’s part of the job.”

  “I get that and I’m fine with it.” She didn’t have a choice on that score, but she meant it. She wasn’t naïve. “I would imagine Tasha doesn’t take security breaches very well.”

  “She’d cut off my balls.” He shrugged. “But I’d deserve it. My job isn’t really about me. I have to remember that every time I walk out the door.”

  Cara got that. She understood how clearances worked. Knew that sometimes sharing every bit of information could cause more damage. Like everything else in life, it was a weighing process.

  But her need to really know him wasn’t a gray line. “It’s not as if I want you to list a few things from your past so I can check them off before I’ll invite you into the house.”

  “Okay.”

  She knew from his tone that he still didn’t get what she wanted. “The communication needs to be authentic in how we talk to each other. Like when I told you about having kids—”

  “That issue only matters to me if it matters to you. There are options. With my past, I’m the last person in the world who would think family is only about biology.”

  God, she loved him for that. He took the news in stride. Made it about what she needed and not what he would lose. He might not understand all of her points, but some things he intrinsically understood better than almost anyone else she knew.

  And she needed him to get this, too. “My point is, at that time in the conversation it made sense to share something with you. It created an extra level of intimacy between us.”

  He frowned. Looked almost amused by her comment. “I thought we had the intimacy part of our relationship down pretty well.”

  He could be such a dude sometimes. “I’m not just talking about sex.”

  He had the smarts to wince. “Of course not.”

  “I want to know about you. Who you are and what you believe. I need to know we are in this together.” Were . . . She should have said were, but couldn’t make herself go back and fix the sentence.

  He nodded. “So you can make sure I’m a good risk.”

  “No.” She didn’t even know where that came from. “So I can know you on a level that connects us.”

  “What if I can’t figure out how to give it to you?” He cleared his throat. “Give it again, I mean.”

  That shot landed. She doubted he meant to throw it but the words knocked into her with the force of a punch. The reality was, she’d turned that question over and over in her mind. The problem with their relationship stemmed from both of them. He phrased every question in terms of what he could do for her, but really she had so many limitations. She fell back on work. She panicked when people got so protective that she felt suffocated.

  She didn’t really trust the idea of getting swept up and so attached to someone else that she couldn’t see straight. It wasn’t logical to her. Yet it happened. The man who whipped her life around and yanked it apart sat a few feet away, running his fingers over her neck. Making her shiver like he always did.

  “What if I can’t be enough for you?” Giving voice to the question cost her something. She hated being vulnerable and asking him for what she wanted or needed. She plowed ahead and made plans. This thing with him blew all of those learned behaviors apart. “Don’t you worry about that?”

  His head snapped back. “That’s ridiculous.”

  Not to her. That was the great fear. That he’d wake up one day and realize she was living her life wrong and try to shove her in a different box or make her into someone else. She’d experienced that sensation her entire life. It made her shut down and push away. Hell, she’d done it to him already.

  “I messed up.” There, she finally admitted it out loud to someone other than herself.

  “What?”

  She stared at the truck’s ceiling for a second as she gathered the courage to take responsibility for the mistakes she’d made with him. Own up to her part of this, and not just blame the situation and hormones and whatever else made it easier for her to walk away and stay away.

  “The tracker wasn’t your best move but I didn’t hand back the ring and leave because of that.” She touched the empty space now. Remembered how she used to twirl it around on her finger.

  “You left because I wouldn’t talk to you.”

  “I left because I was afraid that the rush we felt would be temporary. I wanted out before it walloped me.” The sensations had been so strong and so new. She’d been afraid because it was safer to go back to lukewarm dates and sex that led nowhere. She believed that didn’t cost her anything . . . now she knew better. “Before you moved on.”

  “Cara.” The soothing tone made her melt. “I proposed to you because I loved you.”

  There was that past tense again. She swallowed hard to remove the lump in her throat. “I know.”

  The back of his fingers danced over her cheek. “Still do.”

  She didn’t dare believe it. “Really?”

  He laughed. “Yes. Love, full on and still happening.”

  A zing of light and happiness tore through her. “I don’t know why.”

  He laughed. “Some days I’ve wondered about that myself.”

  The honesty. She loved that about him, too. “I’m not sure where we are now or if we’ve just flipped back into this cycle where it’s thrilling and energetic but not real.”

  “Only you worried about that being an issue between us.” He exhaled. “I know I’ve dismissed that concern in the past, but we can work through it. You just have to be willing to try.”

  She didn’t understand how he could be so sure. For a long time she thought that meant he wasn’t that engaged in the relationship. That the ring and the talk about sharing apartments and lives was just this shallow thing for him. A way for him to feel normal when everything else in his life was absolutely not.

  Now she saw that she took her fears and projected them onto him. She heaped every negative on the situation and could not believe he meant anything he said. She really did wonder why he ever loved her.

  She leaned forward, closing the distance between them. One minute she sat on her side of the bench seat. The next she slid over, almost onto his lap. “You’re a good man.”

  “Prove it.”

  Her mouth hovered over his. “Any chance you brought that extra condom out here with you?”

  “As soon as Parker gave it to me, I stuck it in my pocket. I have it now.”

  She didn’t want to know what conversation led to that exchange. But the conversation back in the mine now made more sense.

  She tried to forget Parker’s grin right before they left. “Well, get it.”

  “Have we settled the issues between us?” He wrapped an arm around her neck and dragged her in even closer.

  One of her legs slid over his. With every touch concentr
ated, talking grew harder. “I’m not sure it’s a light switch we can just flip on and off.”

  She’d finally apologized and the relief soared inside her at having unlocked some of that guilt. Right behind that came a very different feeling. One that required him to lose the pants.

  “I am sitting in the middle of Russia, being hunted by at least one group of armed men.” His hand slipped up and under her jacket. “And all I can think about is stripping you naked.”

  “Are you saying I wreck your concentration?” Man, she hoped that’s what he was saying because that was pretty damn sexy. A guy like him getting all riled up? Yeah, she’d love that.

  “I’m saying I break all the rules for you.”

  Even better. That might have been the hottest thing she’d ever heard. “Kiss me.”

  His lips crashed over hers. Heat sparked between them like it always did. His mouth slipped to her cheek then down her neck. Every touch sent need spiking through her.

  He pressed a hand between her legs. Pushed until she gasped. Rubbed his fingers back and forth. The friction of her pants and his hand had her squirming to get closer. When the sound of the zipper screeched through the truck, she almost laughed in relief. She needed his fingers on her, inside of her.

  The material shifted around her. The tugging and yanking—in a few pulls he had her pants down to the top of her thighs. His fingers skimmed under the elastic band of her underwear. She heard a rip but didn’t care.

  “Tear them off.” She gave the order between kisses. Held his head and kept his hot mouth locked to hers.

  The inside of the truck flipped around on her. For a second she lost her balance. Then she was sitting on his lap, straddling his legs. He had his zipper down and the condom on. She didn’t know where he found the time or the extra hand and she didn’t care. He was ready and that meant they could do this now.

  She lifted up on her knees, rising just above him. His fingers slipped up her thighs and into her heat. She couldn’t handle the foreplay. She wanted it all. Now.

  Taking his erection in her hand, she guided his tip inside her. She lowered her weight and let him plunge inside her. Slow at first, giving her body time to adjust. Then the rhythm took hold. She plunged and retreated. Looked down and watched his body disappear into hers.

  He pushed her hair back and held it there. “You are so fucking sexy.”

  Every time her body fell, he lifted his hips and pushed in deeper. The truck rocked and squeaked. Everything about this, about him, felt right. Their bodies fit together, matched in need.

  He grabbed the bottom of her jacket in his fist and held the edge up, just off her stomach. Then it was his turn to watch. With each push, his mouth opened. The awe was right there on his face. The hunger. All for her.

  Energy pulsed through her. Every muscle inside her screamed for release. She wanted to ride him, enjoy the sensation of controlling the thrusts, but the waves of pleasure already crashed over her.

  When he held her hips steady and lifted his body, slipping inside her—in and out—she almost lost her mind. Her thighs trembled and the tightening inside her cried out for release. She wanted to hold back the orgasm and revel in this moment. Enjoy every precious second.

  Her chest pounded and her body started to buck. She remembered the talk about intimacy and for just a second wondered if this was enough. If this moment, being so tied to him and his pleasure, could last.

  That was her last thought before she came.

  22

  “WE HAVE incoming.” Parker stared at his watch as he delivered the warning.

  Now that they’d been back in the mine for twenty minutes and needed to concentrate, Reid figured this would be a good time to stop watching every move Cara made. Safety needed to be the number one concern. They had one wild card in the building with them—Simon.

  While Reid and Cara were in the truck, Parker had questioned Simon, who didn’t break. Didn’t really say anything. He came off as a smart guy who was smart at one thing—his job. Socially awkward and a bit of a blowhard. He also tended to say things that didn’t make sense. Reid couldn’t tell if he was a mastermind or someone who needed a handler.

  Reid looked over Parker’s shoulder. “Do we have an ID?”

  “I can’t really tell eye color from a dot on my watch.” Parker ended the sarcastic comment by giving Reid the finger.

  “You need a better watch.” An alarm system would also be good. All they had to go on right now was the GPS and some other functions on the watch. The beeping of the watch alarm had to do with proximity. They used it when hunting predators. Reid feared that might fit now.

  Cara walked into the mine entrance with Simon right behind her. She ignored him and looked from Reid to Parker. “What’s happening?”

  The small vibration in her voice suggested either frustration with Simon or worry. She had a sense for danger, so it was likely the latter. After their turn in the truck, all the talking and sex, he wanted more. But it looked like dealing with a new wave of armed guards took priority.

  “Someone is coming.” That’s all he said. He figured she could fill in the blanks. It wasn’t as if they had confirmation of anything anyway.

  Cara being Cara, she didn’t let the conversation drop there. “Russian special forces?”

  “What?” Simon shoved his way past her to stand in front of Parker. “They’re here?”

  Parker rarely rattled and he didn’t this time either. “Possibly.”

  “We need to move.” Simon walked around in circles. His nervous energy bounced off the walls.

  Maybe the part about being hunted by special forces did have some validity. But they were left with the reality of being trapped in a mine. “And go where?”

  “Outside.”

  “The person or people heading our way are outside.” Parker sounded like he wanted to add “dumbass” or some other comment to the end of his sentence but he refrained.

  “Isn’t there a second entrance?” Simon kept walking around. He looked two seconds away from bouncing into walls. “Didn’t you plan for that contingency?”

  “We didn’t build this place,” Reid said, pointing out the obvious.

  “Okay, let’s calm down,” she said. Simon looked like he wanted to argue with her, but he stayed quiet. She took a few deep breaths before continuing. “Do we know how many are out there?”

  “No.” Reid had to admit that would make life easier. Having one come through the door was no big deal. Hell, the way he and Parker shot, ten could come through. But if the special forces guys realized they were missing a bunch of friends, a whole crew could be about to descend on them.

  Simon snorted. “That’s helpful.”

  “Let me hit him.” Parker looked at Reid. Practically begged. “Just once.”

  “The door is locked, right? I mean, he or they or whatever can’t just come in.”

  “You need to calm down,” Parker said.

  “These guys killed Brad right in front of me.” Simon pointed at his temple. “Shot him in the head, and that was after they beat the crap out of him.” He glared at each of them and stopped on Cara. “Do you get what I’m saying?”

  “Panic isn’t going to help,” she said in a rational voice.

  Simon answered back in a voice that inched higher with every word. “Easy for you to say.”

  She frowned. “What does that mean?”

  “They’ll protect you.” Simon threw his arms wide in a gesture that included the entrance tunnel hallway and openings to tunnels farther back.

  He wasn’t wrong, but Reid had still reached the end of his patience. He had a good store of it, but he was fucking done. “That’s enough.”

  The banging started a second later. Two thumps then another two. If it was some sort of signal, Reid didn’t recognize it. From Parker’s confused expression he didn’t either.

  Then another sound reached them. A muffled voice. Reid couldn’t make out the words. The whole thing could be a trick to lure
them in closer then shoot through the door. It was old but still metal. The person on the other side would need a hell of a weapon, but Reid wasn’t taking a chance.

  The voice grew louder. Shouting. Saying something.

  “Anyone getting that?” Parker asked.

  A name. Cara’s name.

  Simon glared at her. “Who is that?”

  She shook her head. “I have no idea.”

  “Sound familiar at all?”

  “How do I tell?”

  Reid searched his mind, tried to think of a way special forces would know her identity. They could have a list of scientists on the expedition. Or . . . he looked at Simon. “Did you tell them her name?”

  Simon’s forehead wrinkled and he shook his head. “No.”

  “Could it be Caleb?” Parker asked.

  Simon threw up his hands. “Who the hell is Caleb?”

  “It’s someone who doesn’t have a way to contact us.” The unstated answer was “not one of us.” Reid knew that much was true.

  But standing there wasn’t fixing this. Whoever was out there knew her name, which likely meant they would not move until they saw her. Him, her, they—the person had Reid’s full attention now. Much more banging and the person could draw attention or break the doors they needed between them and the outside world.

  He motioned for her to get back and then yanked Simon out of the way. “Stay back here.”

  Parker nodded as the two of them approached the doors. Inched forward without making a sound. They pressed against the opposite side of the main tunnel. Neither of them stood in the middle, where they would have been an easy target. Once they were in position, Reid called out, “Who’s there?”

  “Mickey Stoltz.”

  The name sounded familiar because he’d studied the expedition files. It appeared on a few pages. This guy made the arrangements. He had some security title with the foundation but as far as Reid could tell he’d failed to provide anything to the scientists.

  The bigger question was how he got there and why. Tasha was following Niko, and Mickey should be pasted to their sides. She’d reported not seeing him for more than a day. Now Reid knew why. Mickey made a side trip to their neighborhood.