Going the Distance

by Christa Cervone

  Salem throws her car into first and takes off. She hops onto the nearest highway ramp and heads north. Neither of us say a word for some time; I’m content just looking out the window and letting my emotions from the visit settle. I watch as the scenery gradually changes from city to country. The car veers off to the right and starts to slow down.

  I look over at Salem. “Where are we?”

  “In the middle of nowhere. I figured if I got you far enough away, you couldn’t run from me.”

  I smile and give her a slight nod, “You know me too well.”

  “Let’s go for a walk. You look like you need some fresh air.”

  “Okay,” I concede.

  We start down a dirt path, walking hand in hand. “It’s beautiful here.”

  “I know,” Salem says, looking up into the sky. “Jocelyn and I used to hike up here a lot.”

  “Where does this path lead?”

  “Eventually, we’ll come across a waterfall.”

  “Really?!” I try to contain my excitement. “I’ve never seen a waterfall in person.”

  “Yeah, really,” she smiles. “But enough about the waterfall, I want to know who you were visiting at the jail.”

  “You’re not gonna let that go?”

  “Not a chance.”

  Staring straight ahead, I finally admit to her, “My father.”

  “Your father what?” She stops abruptly, giving me a confused look.

  “I was visiting my father.”

  “Wait a minute,” she shakes her head. “I thought your father was dead?”

  “He is.”

  “But you just said…”

  “He’s dead to me.”

  “You’re confusing me. Is he dead or alive?”

  “He’s alive, but I consider him dead. Does that make sense?”

  “So, all this time you’ve talked about your father in the past tense and he’s been alive? Why didn’t you tell me?”

  “It’s not something I like to talk about.” I tug on her hand to continue walking.

  She walks alongside of me, consciously thinking about what to say next. She opens her mouth to say something but no words come out.

  “Just ask it, Salem.”

  “Why?”

  “Why what?”

  “That night I learned about my father, why didn’t you say anything?”

  “I told you, I see Frankie as my father. The guy behind bars is just a sperm donor.”

  “Why is he there, Gabriel? And, how long has he been there?”

  “For murder and about fifteen years.”

  She asks her next question very cautiously. “Who… did he murder?”

  Looking at the ground, I whisper, “My mother.”

  She gasps as both of her hands cover her mouth in shock.

  “I had a shitty childhood, Say. I told you that.”

  “I know you did, but I guess I never realized to what extent.”

  “You don’t have to feel bad for me. I got over it a long time ago.”

  “I know, but you’ve been carrying it around for so long.”

  “Say, my father means nothing to me. It’s just DNA, remember?”

  “Yeah, I remember,” she confirms sadly.

  “Oh hey, I didn’t mean to upset you.” I reach for her hands, kissing the knuckles.

  “You didn’t.”

  “I know, you’re still pissed at your mother.”

  “Pissed is an understatement,” she hisses.

  “Say, she had her reasons for doin’ what she did.”

  “Yes, and her reasons were to protect her ass.”

  “Can I ask you a question?”

  “Of course.”

  “What good would it have done you to know that your dad isn’t your real father? He still raised you, loved you, and kissed your tears away when you were sad or angry.”

  She opens her mouth to say something, but I’m not done. “In my eyes, he’s your dad, not the deadbeat who left your mother alone and pregnant. Your father was a real man. He pushed aside the fact that your mother loved someone else, to love and raise you as his own.”

  A smile begins to grow across Salem’s face. “You’re right; he did.”

  I tap the tip of her nose. “I knew I could get you to smile.”

  “You always can.” She grabs my hand and we start walking again. “But enough about me,” she turns the tables.

  “Say, I’m not sure what else you want me to tell you.”

  “Everything. I want to know everything.”

  Shrugging my shoulders, I begin my story. “There’s not much to tell. Jase and I had shitty parents. My mother was an addict and my father was an abusive drunk. Most days, neither of us even wanted to come home from school. How many kids do you know that actually want to stay at school? That particular night was just like every other night; my parents were arguing, and Jase was already fast asleep.”

  “How old were you?”

  “I was ten and Jase was five.”

  Salem shakes her head and bites her bottom lip.

  “They were both screamin’ at one another and then it got quiet. I was so used to it, that I didn’t even come out of my room to see what was goin’ on. The next morning, the police were poundin’ on our door, and that’s pretty much all I remember.”

  “That must have been so awful for you and Jase.”

  “Honestly, it was the best thing that ever happened in my life. Yeah, I had a rough couple of years, but then I met Frankie, and everything changed.” I glance down to the ground, “Well, for me at least.”

  She stops walking and turns to cup my face in her hands, looking into my watery eyes. “It’s not your fault how things turned out for Jase, Gabriel. You were children and had no say in whether or not you’d stay together, or what type of people would raise you. You both had it bad, and you shouldn’t feel guilty that you were given a chance where Jase wasn’t. It’s okay for you to mourn him. It’s not healthy to keep it bottled up.”

  Slowly, I close my eyes and quietly ask the question burning in my soul, “Why does everyone I love leave me?”

  I feel her thumb brush away the tears. “I’m here,” she says gently, “and I’m not going anywhere.”

  “Are you sure about that?” I wonder aloud.

  Salem cocks her head curiously. “Why do you say that?”

  “At the hospital, you told your mother you were lookin’ to move away.”

  “That was before; things are different now.”

  “You say that, now. I don’t wanna be the one holdin’ you back, Say. You’re just starting your career.”

  “Why would you be holding me back? I can do my line of work anywhere.”

  I run my hand through my hair as my chest tightens. I do my best to keep my insecurities hidden, but the fact that she may even consider leaving is tearing me apart inside. But if it’s what she really wants, then I’d let her go no matter how much it hurts. “Maybe you need to be on your own, to live your life, and explore other options?”

  Salem’s eyes rapidly scan my face. “Are you saying you don’t want to be with me, Gabriel?”

  “No, that’s not what I’m sayin’ at all.”

  She straightens. “Then I’m done talking about this. And if you want to see the waterfall, we better get moving,” she states as she starts to walk off.

  “Uh-uh, you’re not walkin’ away from me,” I whip her back around.

  Her shoulders fall as she exhales, giving me a defeated look.

  “Fuck, you’re even beautiful when you’re angry,” I lean in toward her.

  She looks away quickly, trying to hide her smile.

  Grasping her chin with my hand, I demand, “Look at me.” Her lips part and her chest heaves with each breath; my heart is racing as I prepare to lay my heart at her feet. “I don’t want you to go, Salem. I want you stay.”

  She edges closer to me, brushing her lips against mine. “I don’t want to go,” she answers.

  “Good, we’
re in agreement then. You’re stayin’.” I wink at her. “Now, let’s go find that waterfall!”

  The clock reads three a.m., and I’ve done everything in my power to fall asleep, but the vision of Jase’s lifeless body still haunts me. I’m both physically and mentally exhausted, yet sleep eludes me. It’s been the same thing every night since Jase passed.

  Salem and I have been inseparable since that night, except for when we work or I train. When we’re together, she’s constantly holding my hand, touching, or caressing me in some way. I’ve never felt so loved in my life. Every so often, she’ll whisper into my ear that she loves me, and the sound of her voice is a balm to my soul. Thinking of those moments helps me to keep my focus in trying to get the horrible visions out of my head, but the visions consistently win.

  I can feel her steady breathing against my back. Peeking over my shoulder, I see that she’s fast asleep. Carefully, I ease from her grasp, trying not to wake her. As I cross the room, I hear her sleepy voice say, “Gabriel, where are you going?”

  “I’m just going to get a drink. Go back to sleep.”

  “I can get it for you,” she pats the empty space next to her. “Why don’t you lie back down?”

  “It’s okay, it’s not like I was sleepin’, anyways.”

  “Have you taken any of the sleeping pills my mother prescribed?”

  “Nah.”

  “Gabriel, there’s nothing wrong with taking a sleeping pill as prescribed. Especially, when you need them, like in this type of situation. Believe me, I’ve been there.” Salem gets out of bed and slips on her robe. “If you’re not going to take one, at least let me make you a cup of chamomile tea.”

  I shake my head and follow her into the kitchen. My eyes immediately focus on her ass, which is barely covered by her robe. “Mmmm…”

  She whips her head around, “What are you doing back there?”

  “Enjoying the view,” I respond with a smirk.

  “Gabriel Vega,” she laughs, covering her ass with her hands.

  “I can’t help it; it’s so damn sexy.” I give her a wink.

  As she walks toward the counter, she motions to the kitchen table and suggests, “Why don’t you have a seat while I make your tea?”

  I follow her instead, pressing my body up against hers as she tries to reach for the tea in the cupboard above. “I have another idea,” I murmur into her ear.

  “Oh, I’m sure you have plenty of ideas, none of which involves sleep.”

  “That’s true, but it does involve your bed,” I nip her neck.

  Her head falls back onto my shoulder and a soft moan escapes her. I love how her body reacts to my touch. Neither of us have any control when the other is around. Wrapping my arms around her, I untie her robe and let it fall open. “If you’ll excuse me,” she sneaks out of my hold. I take a step back to let her through.

  She makes her way over to the stovetop and I lift myself onto the kitchen counter. I watch as she moves so gracefully through her kitchen. Her robe fans open, exposing the front half of her body. All she’s wearing on top is a light pink camisole that barely covers her stomach; the outlines of her nipples show through the thin fabric. I dampen my lips as my eyes continue down her body to her tiny panties that don’t leave much for the imagination. I can see the indentation of her lips and my cock twinges; I slide off the counter. “Are you hungry? Do you want me to make you some toast?”

  “No,” I stalk toward her, the need to touch her has taken over me.

  “Gabriel, are you okay?”

  “Mmhmm…” My eyes narrow in on her, shamelessly taking in every beautiful inch. I grab her hips and pull her close.

  A seductive smile appears, giving me an inclination that she knows what I want. “What about your tea?”

  “Fuck the tea.”

  “But, I went through all this trouble to make it for you,” she disputes innocently.

  Dropping to my knees, I groan, “I wanna taste you,” and press my lips up against her mound in a kiss. The tips of my fingers tingle with excitement as I trace her slit through the flimsy fabric of her panties.

  “Gabriel,” she cries out, running her hands over my head, urging me to please her.

  I pull down her panties and spread her open. “Is this what you want?” My tongue tentatively teases her with light licks along the sensitive crease where her leg meets her most private place.

  “You know it is,” she answers on a sigh.

  “Tell me, Say. Tell me what you want.” I can feel her excitement growing, and darts of pleasure shoot through me as her fingernails dig into my scalp.

  “Gabriel…” she pleads. She’s still sometimes shy about telling me exactly what she needs, and I’m pushing her out of her comfort zone, making her hesitant.

  Pulling back, I gaze up at her. “I’ll stop if you don’t tell me.”

  “God, no. Please don’t stop,” she pants, gripping my hair harder.

  “Then tell me,” I press.

  She grips onto my shoulders, steadying herself as I go back to slowly licking so close to where I know she wants me, teasing her mercilessly. Using her grasp on my hair to pull my head back until our eyes meet, she begs, “Eat me out.”

  “That’s all you had to say,” I growl, then hook her legs over my shoulders as her back rests against the kitchen counter.

  Burying my face in her damp core, I plunge my tongue inside before savagely working her clit as she clings onto the counter, crying out euphorically. Casting my eyes up from between her legs as I continue licking and sucking, I see a radiant glow wash over her. I slide two fingers inside and she moans when I curve them to zero in on her G-spot. Rolling her head back, she gasps, “Right there,” and moves her hips in a small circular motion.

  “Mmmm, you taste so good.”

  She tries pulling her hips back. “You’ve got to stop. I… I can’t take it anymore.”

  Knowing she’s close to the edge and wanting her to have this moment of pleasure, I continue to hungrily feast on her pussy. I push her higher and higher until, finally, she explodes, writhing and moaning as her channel repeatedly clamps down on my fingers.

  Overly sensitive now, she jerks her hips back and pulls on my head hissing, “Gabriel, I can’t!”

  “Okay, okay,” I mumble, giving her one last lick. With a satisfied grin, I remove my fingers and ease her legs off my shoulders. I stand in front of her, sucking on my fingers, then point down to my tented boxers. “Was it as good for you, as it was for me?”

  Heat sparks in her passion-glazed eyes and she slowly licks her bottom lip. “I can help you with that.”

  “God, I hope so,” I reply, bringing my lips to hers; she pulls away from me. “What are you doin’?” I ask curiously.

  She gives me a disgusted look and shakes her head. “I can’t.”

  “You can’t, what?”

  “Your lips have been down there,” she whispers as she unconsciously covers her mound with her hand.

  “Yeah, so?”

  “It’s gross.”

  “It’s gross?!” I howl with laughter. “It’s all you,” my tongue swipes my lips, savoring her lingering flavor there, “and you taste fuckin’ phenomenal.” I lean in close to her, “Kiss me, Say. Taste yourself on me.”

  Her breath becomes labored and she parts her lips, inviting me to kiss her. At first, she’s reserved and she lets me do all the work, but she quickly begins to devour me. “See, it’s not so bad, is it?” I tease.

  Shaking her head, she comes up for air. “Make love to me, Gabriel.” She’s so fuckin’ hot, turned on by her own taste. God, I fuckin’ love this woman.

  “Here?”

  “No,” she snickers, “take me to our room.”

  I do a double take. “Our room?”

  “Yes, our room,” she reiterates. “I want you to stay.”

  “I am staying. It’s kinda late to go home now.”

  “I mean forever, Gabriel.”

  I study her face, trying to figu
re out if she’s serious. “Forever?”

  “I want you to move in.”

  “I… I…”

  Her fingers trace over my chest teasingly. “Just think, you could have me whenever you want.”

  “Are you sure that’s what you want?”

  She smiles and it’s the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen. “If it wasn’t what I wanted, I wouldn’t have asked.”

  A huge smile appears on my face in response. “Yes,” I agree happily.

  She plants a kiss on my lips. “Good, now take me to our room and have your way with me.”

  “I thought you’d never ask.” Lifting her up, she wraps her legs around me, and I carry her into our room.

  “Kid, is that you?” Frankie cranes his neck to see around the door in his office.

  I’d barely stepped foot through the front door. Christ, he has good hearing. “Yeah Frankie, it’s me.”

  “I’ve gotta talk to you. Can you come in here for a minute?”

  Standing in the doorway, I say, “Yeah, let me just go throw my stuff in the locker room.”

  “Don’t take too long. It’s important.”

  I hesitate, “Should I be worried?”

  “Nah,” he waves, “just go put your shit away and get your ass back here.”

  Jogging through the gym, I can’t keep my mind from racing. Considering everything that’s happened over the past six months, whatever Frankie has to tell me probably won’t surprise me at this point.

  After quickly dumping my stuff, I return to his office and take a seat. “That was fast,” he states, barely looking up from his paperwork.

  “You told me to hurry up.”

  He looks amused, “Well, you usually do the exact opposite of what I say.”

  He does have a point there. The two of us are a perfect match for one another. We both know how to get the other one going. “So, what’s up?”

  “I’ve got a coupla things, kid.”

  I lean back in my chair and wait.

  “I know you’ve been askin’ me if things have been okay with me these past few months. The truth is, kid, I was havin’ money trouble and came really close a few times to almost losin’ the gym.”

  I edge closer to him. “Jesus Christ, Frankie, why didn’t you say somethin’?”