It Started in Texas

by M. B. Feeney

  "Nothing even happened. He caught up with me, and we talked while we walked." When I paused, all of them must have figured out that something had happened, so I told them about the kiss. Some of them pretended to swoon. "That's it, though. I know we’re seeing him tomorrow night, but I won’t be waiting for something to happen. I’m not that kind of fan. He's going to be busy, and the venue's going to be jammed. I’ll just live on the memory of what it’s like to kiss him." When I laughed, at least three hands reached out and slapped my arm. "What was that for?" I asked, rubbing my now-red skin and pouting.

  "Stop that," Jo said. "There’s no room for self-doubt this weekend. Besides, you’re already halfway there. What’s to say it won’t go further?"

  “What’s to say it will?” He’d probably spot a bright young thing at the gig.

  Jenny must have read my mind and cut me off before I could say it. "Look. Yes, there will be hot little blondes at the show tomorrow, but they have nothing on any of us!"

  The sound of agreement went round the room. When I stifled a yawn, she looked at her watch.

  "I don't know about the rest of you pervs, but I'm off to bed. Need to look bright eyed and bushy tailed for tomorrow."

  Within minutes the room emptied, leaving me and Jo alone to get ourselves ready for bed.

  The bed was a bit too soft for my taste, so I struggled to get to sleep. I pulled my book out of my bag and tried to read for a bit without disturbing Jo, but I couldn't concentrate on the words. All I could think about was those soft, full lips. I sighed and got out of bed to stand out on the small balcony for a smoke.

  "Can't sleep, hun?" Her voice made me jump. I hadn't realised she was still awake.

  "Not really. Too much going on up here." I tapped my forehead gently. "I can't seem to switch off."

  "I bet. I would be exactly the same." Jo grinned at me and got up to pour herself a drink. "I guess it doesn't help with stuff back home."

  "Not really. It’s amazing how one weekend can make me look at the past eleven years in a new way. I always knew things weren’t great, but I assumed they’d get better. Now I know that I need to address the problems when I get home. I expected to come out here, have a good time with the girls, and then go back to real life."

  "Then Gage turned things upside down with those luscious lips of his, huh?"

  I couldn't help but laugh. "Just a smidge. It would have to be me." I rolled my eyes.

  "Sheer dumb luck," she said with a smile on her face.

  I finished my cigarette and stubbed it out on the wall outside the window, but I didn’t go back inside.

  "What are you going to do?"

  "No fucking idea. I'll work stuff out when I get home. Dermot and I need to have a long talk about the future, and more importantly, the kids. I don't think either of us is happy. Maybe we can work it out for the best before I start work and try not to let it disrupt Grace and Sam too much."

  "Yeah, hun. Just live a little this weekend, and then go sort out real life."

  I wrapped my arms around her in a tight hug. "Thanks, babe. Sorry to vent my shit on you all the time." I climbed back into bed.

  "Look, you've listened to me harp on how shit things are, and you still will once we get back to real life. It's what friends do. Now let's get to sleep. Shopping tomorrow, then you’ll see your man again."

  I threw my lighter gently at her for teasing me.

  The next morning I was in a better mood. I'd decided sometime overnight that I was going to make the most of my vacation, whether Gage featured or not. From the window, I could see that it was a gorgeous day, despite being December. It was dry, with wintery sunshine, and perfect for shopping. After opening the balcony door, I lit a cigarette and leaned against the metal railing to watch the world go by. Once I'd finished, I pulled up my suitcase onto my bed and started getting out the things I needed.

  After my wash, I sat down and brushed my hair, tying it up in a French plait to keep it off my face. I checked the dye job I'd done before coming out. So far, no grey. I hadn't missed any places, so that was a bonus. Something else to smile about.

  I'd just finished up when Jo sat up in bed.

  "Morning," I sang out.

  "Someone's chipper."

  Sitting, looking into the mirror above the boxy table, I watched her clamber out of bed and begin getting her stuff ready for the day.

  "The sun is shining, and I have birthday money to burn. What you planning for the day?" I packed away my hairbrush and other junk.

  "Just going to have a mooch. I want to get a few last minute Christmas presents. Might have a kip before tonight so I'm full of energy before we hit the gig. Gotta show them boys how we do it on the other side of the pond." This had been a regular conversation topic between us over the last four years.

  "A nice siesta after lunch sounds like a fantastic idea. Keep myself fresh. I have to phone home to check everyone's okay. Other than that, I'm free."

  "Well, good luck with that." She made her way into the bathroom while I pulled my phone out of my pocket and dialled. It was early afternoon, so I knew Dermot would be awake and able to talk.

  "Hello?" The moment I’d heard his voice, I felt guilt eating away at me. Not only had I kissed another man, but I was comparing the two of them.

  "Hey, it's me."

  "Hey, you. How's Texas?"

  Wow. It looked like we were actually going to have a conversation rather than the usual grunts. For as long as I’d known him, he had never been the most talkative person on the phone. He was more of a face-to-face person, which I respected.

  "It's not too bad, weather-wise. We went out for a drink last night, but I headed back early to grab some kip. How're the kids?" It was quiet in the background, which was never a good sign when they weren’t at school.

  "They went to stay with your mum and dad while I had a tidy up and got the tree. They ended up staying overnight, so I finished wrapping the last of their presents. I’m about to walk round and pick them up."

  Shit. I was going to miss my babies decorating the Christmas tree this year.

  "Make sure you take lots of pictures for me." I was beginning to regret this trip and felt my throat begin to constrict while I fought off tears.

  "I will, and listen, don't get upset about this. It's your birthday, and you've worked hard at uni. When was the last time you did anything for your birthday?” Tears rolled down my cheeks, but I managed to keep silent. “Besides, the kids are happy. Yes, they miss you, but they’re happy as they always are. Grace thinks you're going to bring her back a horse, and Sam just wants a new toy car or train."

  I smiled. In the last five years of riding lessons, my daughter’s love of horses hadn't diminished at all. My son, on the other hand, was just easily pleased. I wiped away my tears and laughed.

  "I'll see what I can get. I got to go now, though. This call is costing us a fortune."

  "Okay, phone or text me before your flight tomorrow, so we know when to expect you. Oh, happy birthday, babe." Without any fuss, the call was ended.

  I couldn't remember the last time either of us told the other we loved them. We both told the kids often enough, so why not each other? With a shake of my head, I put all negative feelings out of my mind and looked round for my boots. After I pulled them on, my phone beeped, indicating a text, and I picked it up.

  Meeting for breakfast in 10. Jx

  "Jo! You nearly ready?" I shouted out, seconds before she opened the bathroom door, ready to face the day. "Sorry, Jenny's just texted me. We're meeting for breakfast." I pulled a woollen beanie onto my head.

  "Okay. Just give me a sec." Jo whizzed around the room, clearing away anything she didn't need. After one final check, she took my arm, and we went down to the hotel restaurant to meet the others.

  Our group squeezed itself around a round table and began discussing everyone's plans for the day. All the others were going to catch up on last-minute Christmas shopping, making me glad I'd done all of mine and was able to
spend my money on myself. My birthday request had been no presents from family, which allowed me to go out and pick what I wanted.

  I liked that, although we had come out together, no one was making demands on anyone else’s time. If we wanted to go off on our own, that was fine, and if we wanted to stick with one or more of the others, great. Spending time with actual adults was a joy.

  "What's everyone having to eat? I'm starving," Jo announced with a big smile on her face. She’d been excited about this trip and was loving every minute of it.

  "Can you order me some pancakes? I'm nipping out for a smoke." I stood up and walked outside. After finding a spot by the window that overlooked our table so I could see when our food was delivered, I lit a cigarette and basked in the bright sunshine. The girls pulled funny faces at me, acting like the complete idiots I knew they were. Grinning, I turned my back on them.

  I was so glad I’d met this bunch of crazy chicks online. They’d gotten me through some rough times at uni and with Dermot. It was still unbelievable that after four years, we were finally able to meet in person. I finished my cigarette, turned to look back inside, and then froze. Jenny was speaking to Gage and Drew, who had joined our table. I turned back around and lit another cigarette that I didn't really want. It was too early for this. I had been preparing myself to see Gage at the show, not at breakfast.

  "Hey." His voice came from right next to me, making me jump. I turned to look at him, and my body reacted to him in ways it shouldn’t have.

  "Morning." Amazed that I’d managed to keep my voice even, I was proud of myself for not making a fool of myself.

  "Did you sleep okay?"

  This was weird. "Eventually, yeah."

  Next he'd be asking me about the weather. We stood in silence for a few minutes while I finished my cigarette, but when I turned. I saw our food had arrived. "I have to go-"

  "What are you doing today?" he interrupted me, and I turned back to look at him.

  "Nothing too strenuous, just some shopping. I've got some money to splurge with."

  He grinned at my words. "Fancy some company? I got some of my own birthday dollars to spend."

  I was shocked. First the kiss, now he wanted to spend time with me. "Uh, sure. That would be great. I’m not being rude, but I need to go and eat my breakfast." I indicated the stack of pancakes waiting for me inside.

  Without saying another word, he got a gentle hold on my arm and led me back to my seat.

  I could feel the heat in my face while I started to eat. Everyone was watching us. My body was still singing from his touch, but I needed to remain calm. The rest of Gage's bandmates had joined us, and he informed them he would meet them at the venue after he showed me the sights of Houston. The girls all looked at me, Jo with one eyebrow raised. When my phone beeped, I stopped eating to check it.

  Someone got a date, huh? Jx

  My fingers flew over the screen as I hid my phone under the table. Does shopping count as a date?

  If it's just the 2 of u then HELL YEAH Jx.

  She grinned in response to my subtle nod. Since I knew the inquisition would continue later, I carried on eating. I tried to make my food last as long as possible while everyone talked about their plans for our day in the city, but I was hungry. My plate was soon empty, and I couldn’t stall any more.

  "Are you ready to go?" Gage ignored the looks from the other guys when he stood up, holding his hand out to me.

  Again, I felt my face go hot, and I took his hand to stand up.

  "Hey, Gage. Don't lose track of time. Sound check at five, man," Matt told him, a twinkle in his eye.

  "Yeah, I know."

  We walked out to cat calls and wolf whistles from everyone. As soon as my foot hit the pavement, my phone beeped again.

  Yeah, don't lose track of time :P Jx.

  Bite me x.

  I threw my phone into my bag and carried on walking. It was surreal to think that I was going shopping with Gage Weston, of all people. I tried not to think about it too much, pretending that I was just out with one of my male friends. It wasn't working, though. I was trembling like a teenager.

  "You cold?" he asked me.

  "Not really. Why?" It was then I realised we were still holding hands.

  "You're shivering." He squeezed my hand a little tighter, and I let out a soft groan at my body's inability to control itself.

  "I'm fine." I decided to go for honesty. "Just a bit nervous."

  "Why are you nervous?"

  "Well, I'm a nobody from the UK, and you're you, aren't you?"

  He stopped walking and looked at me. "What's that supposed to mean?"

  I pulled my hand out of his. "Oh come on. How many girls do you get after you? And there’s paparazzi following you around each day. I'm just a mum of two on holiday."

  "How can you say that? Mothers get a bum rap these days. Raising a family is one of the most important things anyone can do, so don't say that you are just a mom." Wow. That put me in my place.

  "It's not often you hear someone talk like that. Thank you." I really wanted to change the subject to something less serious, but my brain had decided to shut down as soon as I looked into those eyes of his.

  "My momma did good with me." He gave me a crooked smile that showed off his cheekbones to perfection.

  "You know, there is something different about you, though."

  Oh shit. Where was this going?

  "How's that?"

  "You look me in the eye. Most people look over my shoulder. It irritates the hell outta me."

  "Maybe they’re looking for paps, hoping to get their moment in the spotlight or that you'll introduce them to Jack Hixton." I couldn't stop laughing at the grimace on his face when I referred to the brooding, hulking star of Wings, the movie Gage had just finished filming. The film was about a group of fallen angels adjusting to being on Earth and had been based on a set of books that were all the rage.

  "Yeah, well. That ain't gonna happen. Dude’s a prick. Shall we get some shopping done, ma’am?" He offered me his arm, allowing me to tuck my hand into the crook of his elbow.

  "How do you cope with people watching your every move? I think it would drive me insane."

  "I just get on with my life. There's no point in hiding for fear that someone's going to see you and splash your business all over the internet. It's just one of the hazards of doing a job I love to do."

  I could have sworn he took a furtive look around us.

  “Thankfully, I’m not the star in Wings, so I don’t get too much attention. Jack and Helena have that privilege.” Helena Kane was the female lead in the film and was rumoured to be a total sweetheart.

  I was tempted to ask more about them, but didn’t think it would have been appreciated. "Everything has its downsides."

  "It does, indeed. Now, is there anything in particular you're looking for?"

  Unable to stop myself, I watched his hands manipulate a cigarette from his slightly crushed packet.

  "I really need some new boots. I’ve been promising myself a genuine pair of cowboy boots this weekend."

  Gage looked down at my feet, which were encased in the battered boots I loved. "Easy enough to deal with," he drawled, quoting his character in Wings, an archangel hiding in Texas from Michael and Raphael.

  Two hours later and not only did I own the most gorgeous new pair of soft black boots, but I'd also splashed out on some new jeans. I'd had a love affair with denim for as long as I could remember, but I rarely bought new jeans for myself. I'd also gotten myself a new hat and swapped out my beanie for it. However, Gage hadn't bought himself anything yet, and it was making me feel self-conscious.

  "I thought you wanted to treat yourself to some birthday presents." Although I was in need of nicotine and food, he had told me he wanted to shop and hadn’t yet.

  "Nothing new has caught my eye yet."

  "Oh, so you're an impulse buyer? They're the worst. How many things have you got that you've never worn or used?"

/>   He looked away sheepishly.

  "I thought so."

  "Is there anything else you’re looking for, or do you want to go and eat?"

  That threw me. I assumed I'd go back to the hotel for something. "Sure, I could eat."

  Gage grabbed my hand and led me down a side street. "I know the perfect place. You like steak, right?"

  "Who doesn't?"

  He laughed and just kept walking.

  "Don't forget, you've got a sound check soon." I thought I'd better be responsible.

  "That's not for another few hours yet. Don't worry. I've never let the guys down yet. Let's go."

  I allowed him to lead me into a small restaurant. Inside it was quiet, despite being lunch time. The girl behind the bar had a look of utter joy on her face when she realised who had walked in.

  We sat at a table away from the window and looked over the menu. I knew I wanted a sirloin with chips and pepper sauce. My mouth watered just thinking about it.

  "Hi, I'm Amy, and I'll be your server today. What can I get you to drink?" It wasn’t hard to notice that she was making googly eyes at Gage while he read through the menu.

  "I'll take a beer. You?" He looked up at me, smiling.

  "I'll have the same, thanks."

  "Okay, I’ll be back in a few with your drinks and to take your order." Amy spun on her heel and walked away with an exaggerated wiggle.

  I rolled my eyes and looked back at Gage, who was smirking at me.

  "What?" I raised an eyebrow at him.

  "What was the eye roll for?" He glanced over towards the bar at Amy, who was staring at him intently.

  "Oh please. I've been her. She needs to realise it doesn't work. What is she, twelve?" I didn't bother lowering my voice when Amy made her way back with our drinks.

  "Have you decided what you'd like?" She licked her lips and stared at Gage.

  He smiled politely at her before placing his order.

  She turned to me. "And you?"

  I reeled off my order while rooting around in my bag for my phone. If she wanted to be rude, I could too. "It'll be out in about half an hour. Holler if you need anything else."