“I mean you need to leave for a while. I have to sort things out.” I could tell she didn’t really want to ask me to leave.
“Camilla, you want to put me out of our house?” I asked for clarification.
“Yes, Xavier. Please don’t make this harder than it already is. I need time to myself. I’m not gonna stay at Emmanuel’s anymore but I still don’t need to stay around you either. I need to be to myself.” Her voice sounded a bit stronger and she let her arms fall to her sides. Well shit, at least she wouldn’t be in the Devil’s den anymore. It was a small consolation but I had to take what I could get right now.
“For how long?” I asked her.
“I don’t know. There’s not really a time limit on healing, is there?” She had bite to her tone letting me know I should just agree and then back off.
“Okay. Okay, Camilla. Can I still see Chloe?” I asked. I felt the doubt and paranoia start to seep in but I pushed it away. I had to. Now wasn’t the time.
“Of course you can. She’s your daughter. I’m not bitter, I just need to be alone for a little while.”
“Does that mean there’s hope for us?” My eyebrows lifted and I looked to her desperately for an answer. I needed to know.
“After some time passes…yeah. I think so,” she said. My heart thundered in my chest and I couldn’t help wrapping my arms around her.
“Camilla, I am so sorry I fucked up baby.” I kissed the top of her head and then her lips. I was relieved when she didn’t push me away. She actually pressed her lips back against mine. Tears were streaming so rapidly down her face they even wet my cheeks. I ran my fingers through her hair and exhaled. I missed her more than I even realized. “I’m gonna fix this,” I told her earnestly. Her eyes were closed and she nodded with her forehead against mine. I pulled her on top of my lap and I knew she felt my dick pressing into her when she pressed back sitting her weight on me.
“You better,” she sniffled.
“You might not like how I have to fix it though,” I admitted. She opened her eyes and looked at me. Confusion flooded her features. It seemed that I always fucked shit up when I let myself run rampant around women. The only way I was able to tame that side of me in the past was when I became celibate.
“What are you talking about, Xavier?” She asked. My hands rested on her waist and I traced her face with my eyes.
“Remember when we first started fucking around. What did I tell you I’d done before you?”
“You were celibate,” she almost whispered. She rolled her eyes a bit then focused on me. “You know that doesn’t mean I’m gonna stop seeing Emmanuel?” I tensed a bit at hearing that but I knew how she worked. I knew she wanted to hurt me back some kind of way. I’d take that hit though if it meant I could have her back in some capacity and have a chance to right my wrongs, I’d take it.
“Okay,” I sighed.
“Right now you and I are in limbo,” She told me. My dick was still hard and still begging to get inside of her but I focused on what she was saying.
“So we’re not together?” I frowned. She shook her head quickly.
“No, we’re taking a break. You obviously need it just as much as I do.” She was right. I hated it, but she was fucking right. Besides, the only way I’d be able to remain celibate was if I moved out for a little while. I could never be around Camilla day in and day out without touching her and making love to her. Without fucking her brains out. My eyes rested on her breasts. She didn’t have on a bra under the shirt she was wearing and her nipples were so hard.
If I was going to start being celibate again, I might as well start off with the best pussy I’ve ever had in my life. I put my mouth on her nipple through her shirt and she gasped.
“Xavier, Chloe is right over there.” She whispered. She tried to scramble off of my lap but I held her in place firmly.
“Let me put her in her room and put something on TV. Trust me, it won’t take that long,” I smirked. I’d been missing her and I hadn’t even breathed in Jada’s direction in nearly a week so I knew for a fact that Camilla would have me coming quick.
“Okay,” She bit her bottom lip and slid off of me. I scooped Chloe up and carried her to her room. I put on her favorite cartoon and gave her a toy with plenty of lights and noise. I picked up her monitor and then rushed back to Camilla. I took her in the kitchen and we both craned our necks around the corner to make sure we didn’t see any signs of the little one.
Once we were in the clear, I buried my face in Camilla’s neck and inhaled her. She smelled like apples and I wanted to taste her pussy but I knew we had a limited time block. She kissed my face and looked into my eyes. “I’m sorry Wolf fucked your face up.” She frowned.
“I deserved it.” I slid my hands along her sides and then moved to cup her breasts. I tugged her leggings down around her knees and bent her over the island. I slipped my finger inside of her and she was already so wet. I licked her juices from my finger and grabbed her hair for leverage as I plowed into her. She felt so damn good I had to pause to relish it. Camilla’s moans snapped me out of it and I began to slide in and out of her cunt.
My heart thumped loudly and I could feel it all over my body as I pushed deeper into her tight little pussy. She was squeezing my dick between her walls already. I felt the trickle slipping onto my dick and down my balls I knew she came already. She missed me too.
She might have been mad but there was no way she could deny how her body reacted to me. I kept fucking her, this time rougher until she had to bite down on her lip to keep from screaming. The more she tried to keep her noises down, the more it turned me on though. I wrapped my hand around her throat and listened as she whispered my name.
My motherfucking name.
Her pussy was getting tight again and this time I couldn’t hold out. I came inside of her so hard I shut my eyes against the sensations rippling through me.
“Fuck,” I groaned as I emptied into her. Her insides were throbbing like crazy. It was like she was using her pussy to suck my dick. My body shuddered involuntarily and I felt like I might fall on my ass. “Goddammit Camilla,” I cursed loudly. She was so fucking addictive and her pussy was magic. I would swear my entire damn life on it. No other woman could even begin to come close to her.
I kissed her slowly and begged her to forgive me. I didn’t care if I sounded weak. I needed her. She was everything to me. I kept hearing Emmanuel in my head threatening to take my family and it shook me a little. Especially after making love to Camilla. I couldn’t let him take them from me, and I knew he would if I ever slipped up again. I couldn’t let that happen.
**
Even though it broke me up inside, I started packing things so I could move out for a while. I tried to explain to Chloe the best way I could that I was gonna be staying somewhere else. She didn’t get it at all but I gave it my best shot.
I refused to rent an apartment because it felt too long term. Instead I got a suite at a hotel close to New Grace. That way I could still see both my girls frequently. Camilla seemed torn about me leaving but we both knew I couldn’t be around her if I was attempting celibacy and we were taking a break.
As soon as I got settled in my suite, my damn phone buzzed and a string of naked pictures of Jada came through. I shut my eyes and blew out a breath as I deleted each one. To my surprise, my dick didn’t even wake up. When I didn’t respond to her she sent me a message.
Jada: Can you come play?
Me: Nah. I can’t. We’re done. I’m blocking you.
Jada: Xavier, don’t do that.
I didn’t respond back, I did hit the block button on my phone though. I was done getting caught up over bullshit. Jada would be mad when I saw her at work tomorrow but she would have to deal with it. I’d already allowed her to run rampant and fuck my life up enough.
It was my time for isolation and work. I didn’t want to do a damn thing but go to work, have meetings, make money, and come back to my suite.
**
<
br /> Chapter Twelve
Camilla
I’d just approved a new media packet for New Grace’s youth group when my phone rang in my pocket. I recognized the number immediately. I excused myself to my office for privacy.
“Dad?” It took a while for his voice to come through but when I finally heard him I was so excited. I knew very well how prison numbers showed up and there was only one person I knew who was locked up.
“Hey baby girl.” I could hear his smile even through the phone. My heart leapt into my throat and a huge grin cracked across my face. “How are you and Chloe?”
“Fine. We’re fine. Oh my god I missed hearing your voice. I miss you.” I was overcome with tears in an instant. I’d been writing Dad letters over the past year. I sent him pictures of Chloe from the first ultrasound up until just a couple weeks ago when she managed to climb up on the kitchen stool without killing herself. I flooded him with updates over every single thing no matter how small, because I missed him. I’d never missed anyone so deeply before in all of my life.
It stung knowing he couldn’t respond to anything I sent because he was under constant watch from Emmanuel’s goons on the inside. He had correctional officers on his payroll ever since he became Mayor and he abused it to the fullest in order to keep tabs on Dad. I didn’t care though. I didn’t care if Emmanuel knew I was flooding my father with letters and pictures. I knew he wasn’t going to do shit but fuss and probably fuck the shit out of me, which isn’t very much of a punishment since I enjoy it so much.
When I got my first letter from my dad last month I just stared at it and wondered what kind of trouble he would get in for reaching out to me. I was almost afraid to open it. I was glad I did though.
He told me that a new guard was hired and that he wasn’t on the Mayor’s payroll…yet so he could send me a few letters and maybe even call me soon. I was giddy with anticipation but with everything that’s been going on I’d nearly forgotten about it. Now I was hearing his voice for the first time in more than a year.
“I miss you too baby girl. I look at your pictures every day and…and Chloe. She’s so beautiful.” His voice cracked and it made the tears spill down my face even faster. I can’t even breathe through my nose because the tears are coming so fast.
“She looks like you,” I told him fondly.
“She looks like me and you,” he laughed. “Look, I can’t stay on here long but just know, I’m up for parole next month. I’ve done nearly everything I know Manny wants me to do. Hopefully he’ll grow a conscience and I can come home to you and my granddaughter.” His tone seemed to caress that word and it made my heart smile.
“I hope so. You want me to talk to him?” I asked. “I can see where his head is at.”
“No. Just…don’t say anything. I’m already doing too much by calling you,” he sighed into the phone. “I love you so much Camilla. I’ve had a lot of time to think and let’s just say the only thing I want to focus on when I get out is you and Chloe. Okay?”
“Okay,” I said smiling through my tears. I paid special attention to him saying when he gets out. He must have felt positive about it. The hardest thing for me to do was hang up that phone. It seemed like we were talking for a lifetime but at the same time it seemed to fly by in the blink of an eye. Even though he didn’t want me to talk to Emmanuel about him getting out, I had to. I missed my father way too much and he needed to see his granddaughter.
Once I wiped my tears away and composed myself I called Alexander. I didn’t expect an answer since it was normal business hours for him but I left him a message. “Hey Alexander. It’s me. I did what you asked me to yesterday so you know what that means…baked ziti. Red wine. Tonight. Okay, bye.” I ended the call and tried to force myself to think about work.
Just as I felt my brain seemingly floating away on a cloud, Dempsey knocked on the door and let himself in. I brightened immediately and ran to hug him. “Hey, how’s my girl?” He chuckled.
“Bored to death,” I told him.
“Well let me help you to un-bore yourself. I got something interesting on your friend Jada Pearson.” He grinned at me and waved an envelope in front of my face. I snatched it from him and sat on my desk.
“Go ahead and open it,” he smiled. “You know I hate being alone around you for too long. I value my life,” he joked with a wink.
“Shut up Dempsey. Emmanuel isn’t worried about you.”
“He’s worried about Xavier though.” He said, the smile dropping from his lips. I slipped my finger under the flap of the envelope and nodded. “He doesn’t want you getting hurt. You know that shit would send him off the deep end. I can’t think of many things that unnerve that man but you’re one of them.” He was right, and that’s why I wanted to talk to him about my dad. I’m the only person that can ever get through to him.
“Xavier won’t hurt me,” I told him. “We’re taking a break right now anyway, so there’s nothing to worry about.”
“Okay sweetheart. I trust you.” I gave him a small smile then I pulled papers from the envelope. Inside were Jada’s mug shot, a bunch of stills from her on a stage, naked and a small stack of files. My eyebrows flew up on my forehead and then a slow laugh escaped my lips.
“Oh wow, so Jada Pearson doesn’t exist but Jade Peterson does,” I quirked my eyebrow as I looked over her real name.
“Exactly. Phony name equals a phony background check. She’s also been arrested multiple times and she’s known for sleeping with men who have money. She also owes a pretty hefty sum of money to some guys into some bad things,” he said eyeing me. “So you know…do what you will with the info baby doll. I know you’re just like your other half. Well, your other, other half.” He laughed and headed towards the door.
“Thanks Dempsey. You always come through.” I grinned as I thumbed through the papers.
“Not a problem,” he said, “Hey Mary, you okay sweetheart?” I hopped up from my chair and rushed to the door. Mary was standing there holding my crying daughter. My entire body was consumed with anxiety and fear. I scooped Chloe into my arms and looked over her no less than one hundred times to make sure she wasn’t hurt.
“What’s wrong?” I asked Mary, who looked to be a combination of concerned and angry. She shifted her weight from one foot to the other and wrung her hands nervously. “What’s wrong?!” I shouted making Chloe jump.
“I was taking the kids for their afternoon walk and I went to the Wiggle Worms room and I didn’t see Chloe. I heard Miss Pearson in the bathroom talking so I went to see what was going on. She was squeezing Chloe’s arm so hard and shaking her, Chloe was crying. I snatched her up and came right to you. Janine is with the kids right now. Miss Pearson went straight to Pastor Sanders.” I lifted Chloe’s sleeve and saw red angry finger marks on her honey skin. I held her in my arms and kissed her bruise.
“Hey baby, you want some juice? I have your favorite juice.” I smiled and pinched her cheek. She looked at me and nodded, holding her hands out. I gave her a pink sippy cup and stood to my feet. The rage coursing through me wasn’t hot this time. It wasn’t lava or fire it was ice. I’d never experienced icy rage before. It swallowed me whole and I didn’t feel my head pulsing or see colors swirling.
“Mary, I think we better stay with the munchkin.” Dempsey forced a smile for Chloe’s sake and looked at me with pleading gray eyes. I looked from him to Mary and asked where Xavier was.
“He’s in the west meeting room,” Mary answered slowly.
“Thank you. Would you two mind watching Chloe for a second? I’ll be right back.”
“Um…Camilla, sweetheart you need me to call Manny?” Dempsey asked.
“Oh, no. Thank you though. I’ll be right back.” I turned on my heel and raced over to the west wing of the building where I immediately heard Xavier’s voice booming through the walls. I followed the sound and pulled the door open to the meeting room. Jada, or Jade or whoever the fuck she pretended to be, was standing with her back against th
e wall, tears streaming down her face and Xavier glowering down at her. Both heads turned in my direction when I walked in.
Xavier backed away as if to show me he wasn’t doing anything suspicious but I already knew. “Camilla, where’s Chlo?” He asked.
“My office,” I replied in an eerily calm voice. It didn’t even sound like it belonged to me. Xavier took another step back once he saw me heading for Jada. “What exactly happened?” I asked with a smile on my face.
“I’m so sorry, Camilla. I just got frustrated.” Jada sobbed.
“Frustrated?” I smiled. “How so?”
“Well Chloe needed to be changed but Mary was out of the room and she would only go with her. She wouldn’t budge. I just…I used too much force when I grabbed her. I am so sorry.” That was all I needed to hear. I only needed to hear that she put her hands on my daughter on purpose.
“I understand,” I sighed and stroked her hair. By this time Xavier was looking at me like I’d grown two heads. “Using too much force happens when you get frustrated.” Jada nodded and wiped her tears. She never saw me draw my fist back. I slammed it into her face repeatedly until she fell to the floor making a garbled sound through tears and blood.
I dropped to the floor and hovered over her, tilting my head to the side. “See? Sometimes I use too much force when I get frustrated too.” I smiled again and cracked my fist into the bloodiest part of her face with a crunch. I didn’t feel my knuckles becoming raw. I didn’t notice that Jada stopped screaming nor did I feel Xavier’s arms around me. I knew it was happening but I couldn’t feel any of it. I was numb.
There was a swirl of activity around me. I barely paid attention to any of it. Someone was bandaging my hand another person was rolling a stretcher onto an ambulance and shouting. Deep voices boomed around me one coming from my left and one from my right. All I could think about was Chloe. My poor baby girl was scared and hurt. That bitch hurt my baby.
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