The Skeptics Annotated Bible
Page 175
(28.25) “He that putteth his trust in the LORD shall be made fat.” So that’s why there are so many fat Christians! (And starving non-Christians.)
26 He that trusteth in his own heart is a fool: but whoso walketh wisely, he shall be delivered.
(28.26) “He that trusteth in his own heart is a fool.”
136 Should we follow our own hearts?
297 Is it OK to call someone a fool?
27 He that giveth unto the poor shall not lack: but he that hideth his eyes shall have many a curse.
28 When the wicked rise, men hide themselves: but when they perish, the righteous increase.
(28.28) “When the wicked rise, men hide themselves: but when they perish, the righteous increase.”
35 Has there ever been a righteous person?
PROVERBS 29
29 He, that being often reproved hardeneth his neck, shall suddenly be destroyed, and that without remedy.
2 When the righteous are in authority, the people rejoice: but when the wicked beareth rule, the people mourn.
(29.2) “When the righteous are in authority, the people rejoice.”
35 Has there ever been a righteous person?
3 Whoso loveth wisdom rejoiceth his father: but he that keepeth company with harlots spendeth his substance.
(29.3) “Whoso loveth wisdom rejoiceth his father.”
4 The king by judgment establisheth the land: but he that receiveth gifts overthroweth it.
5 A man that flattereth his neighbour spreadeth a net for his feet.
(29.5) “A man that flattereth his neighbour spreadeth a net for his feet.”
6 In the transgression of an evil man there is a snare: but the righteous doth sing and rejoice.
(29.6) “The righteous doth sing and rejoice.”
35 Has there ever been a righteous person?
7 The righteous considereth the cause of the poor: but the wicked regardeth not to know it.
(29.7) “The righteous considereth the cause of the poor: but the wicked regardeth not to know it.”
35 Has there ever been a righteous person?
8 Scornful men bring a city into a snare: but wise men turn away wrath.
9 If a wise man contendeth with a foolish man, whether he rage or laugh, there is no rest.
10 The bloodthirsty hate the upright: but the just seek his soul.
(29.10) “The just seek his soul.”
33 Has the ever been a just person?
11 A fool uttereth all his mind: but a wise man keepeth it in till afterwards.
(29.11) “A fool uttereth all his mind: but a wise man keepeth it in till afterwards.”
12 If a ruler hearken to lies, all his servants are wicked.
13 The poor and the deceitful man meet together: the LORD lighteneth both their eyes.
14 The king that faithfully judgeth the poor, his throne shall be established for ever.
15 The rod and reproof give wisdom: but a child left to himself bringeth his mother to shame.
(29.15) “The rod and reproof give wisdom: but a child left to himself bringeth his mother to shame.” Beating your children will make them wise. (Don’t let them think for themselves.)
16 When the wicked are multiplied, transgression increaseth: but the righteous shall see their fall.
(29.16) “The righteous shall see their fall.”
35 Has there ever been a righteous person?
17 Correct thy son, and he shall give thee rest; yea, he shall give delight unto thy soul.
18 Where there is no vision, the people perish: but he that keepeth the law, happy is he.
19 A servant will not be corrected by words: for though he understand he will not answer.
(29.19) “A servant will not be corrected by words: for though he understand he will not answer.” Beat your servants (slaves), as though they were your children.
(29.20-23)
20 Seest thou a man that is hasty in his words? there is more hope of a fool than of him.
(29.20) “Seest thou a man that is hasty in his words? there is more hope of a fool than of him.”
21 He that delicately bringeth up his servant from a child shall have him become his son at the length.
22 An angry man stirreth up strife, and a furious man aboundeth in transgression.
(29.22) “An angry man stirreth up strife, and a furious man aboundeth in transgression.”
23 A man’s pride shall bring him low: but honour shall uphold the humble in spirit.
(29.23) “A man’s pride shall bring him low: but honour shall uphold the humble in spirit.”
24 Whoso is partner with a thief hateth his own soul: he heareth cursing, and bewrayeth it not.
25 The fear of man bringeth a snare: but whoso putteth his trust in the LORD shall be safe.
(29.25) “Whoso putteth his trust in the LORD shall be safe.”
26 Many seek the ruler’s favour; but every man’s judgment cometh from the LORD.
27 An unjust man is an abomination to the just: and he that is upright in the way is abomination to the wicked.
(29.27) “An unjust man is an abomination to the just.”
33 Has the ever been a just person?
PROVERBS 30
30 The words of Agur the son of Jakeh, even the prophecy: the man spake unto Ithiel, even unto Ithiel and Ucal,
2 Surely I am more brutish than any man, and have not the understanding of a man.
3 I neither learned wisdom, nor have the knowledge of the holy.
4 Who hath ascended up into heaven, or descended? who hath gathered the wind in his fists? who hath bound the waters in a garment? who hath established all the ends of the earth? what is his name, and what is his son’s name, if thou canst tell?
5 Every word of God is pure: he is a shield unto them that put their trust in him.
(30.5) “Every word of God is pure.” Well then, the Bible must not be the word of God. See Ezekiel 23.20 and Malachi 2.3 for just two examples of the “pure word of God.”
250 Is every word of God pure?
6 Add thou not unto his words, lest he reprove thee, and thou be found a liar.
7 Two things have I required of thee; deny me them not before I die:
8 Remove far from me vanity and lies: give me neither poverty nor riches; feed me with food convenient for me:
9 Lest I be full, and deny thee, and say, Who is the LORD? or lest I be poor, and steal, and take the name of my God in vain.
10 Accuse not a servant unto his master, lest he curse thee, and thou be found guilty.
11 There is a generation that curseth their father, and doth not bless their mother.
12 There is a generation that are pure in their own eyes, and yet is not washed from their filthiness.
13 There is a generation, O how lofty are their eyes! and their eyelids are lifted up.
14 There is a generation, whose teeth are as swords, and their jaw teeth as knives, to devour the poor from off the earth, and the needy from among men.
15 The horseleach hath two daughters, crying, Give, give. There are three things that are never satisfied, yea, four things say not, It is enough:
16 The grave; and the barren womb; the earth that is not filled with water; and the fire that saith not, It is enough.
17 The eye that mocketh at his father, and despiseth to obey his mother, the ravens of the valley shall pick it out, and the young eagles shall eat it.
(30.17) “The eye that mocketh at his father, and despiseth to obey his mother, the ravens of the valley shall pick it out, and the young eagles shall eat it.” If you mock your father or disobey your mother, the ravens will pick out your eyeballs and the eagles will eat them.
18 There be three things which are too wonderful for me, yea, four which I know not:
19 The way of an eagle in the air; the way of a serpent upon a rock; the way of a ship in the midst of the sea; and the way of a man with a maid.
(30.18-19) “There be three things which are too wonderful for
me, yea, four which I know not: The way of an eagle in the air; the way of a serpent upon a rock; the way of a ship in the midst of the sea; and the way of a man with a maid.” One of the four “wonderful” things is “the way of a man with a maid.” (As a sailor and birdwatcher, though, I have to agree that the way an eagle flies and a ship sails are two of the most wonderful things.)
20 Such is the way of an adulterous woman; she eateth, and wipeth her mouth, and saith, I have done no wickedness.
(30.20) “Such is the way of an adulterous woman; she eateth, and wipeth her mouth, and saith, I have done no wickedness.”
21 For three things the earth is disquieted, and for four which it cannot bear:
(30.21, 23) “Three things the earth is disquieted, and for four which it cannot bear … an odious woman when she is married.” One of the three or four things that the earth cannot bear is an odious married woman.
22 For a servant when he reigneth; and a fool when he is filled with meat;
23 For an odious woman when she is married; and an handmaid that is heir to her mistress.
24 There be four things which are little upon the earth, but they are exceeding wise:
25 The ants are a people not strong, yet they prepare their meat in the summer;
26 The conies are but a feeble folk, yet make they their houses in the rocks;
27 The locusts have no king, yet go they forth all of them by bands;
28 The spider taketh hold with her hands, and is in kings’ palaces.
29 There be three things which go well, yea, four are comely in going:
30 A lion which is strongest among beasts, and turneth not away for any;
31 A greyhound; an he goat also; and a king, against whom there is no rising up.
32 If thou hast done foolishly in lifting up thyself, or if thou hast thought evil, lay thine hand upon thy mouth.
33 Surely the churning of milk bringeth forth butter, and the wringing of the nose bringeth forth blood: so the forcing of wrath bringeth forth strife.
(30.33) “The wringing of the nose bringeth forth blood.”
PROVERBS 31
31 The words of king Lemuel, the prophecy that his mother taught him.
2 What, my son? and what, the son of my womb? and what, the son of my vows?
3 Give not thy strength unto women, nor thy ways to that which destroyeth kings.
(31.3) “Give not thy strength unto women.”
4 It is not for kings, O Lemuel, it is not for kings to drink wine; nor for princes strong drink:
5 Lest they drink, and forget the law, and pervert the judgment of any of the afflicted.
6 Give strong drink unto him that is ready to perish, and wine unto those that be of heavy hearts.
7 Let him drink, and forget his poverty, and remember his misery no more.
(31.6-7) “Give strong drink unto him that is ready to perish, and wine unto those that be of heavy hearts. Let him drink, and forget his poverty, and remember his misery no more.”
71 Is it OK to drink alcohol?.
8 Open thy mouth for the dumb in the cause of all such as are appointed to destruction.
9 Open thy mouth, judge righteously, and plead the cause of the poor and needy.
(31.8-9) “Open thy mouth for the dumb in the cause of all such as are appointed to destruction. Open thy mouth, judge righteously, and plead the cause of the poor and needy.” I don’t often quote from the NIV, but I will in this case. “Speak up for those who cannot speak for themselves, for the rights of all who are destitute. Speak up and judge fairly; defend the rights of the poor and needy.” (NIV)
10 Who can find a virtuous woman? for her price is far above rubies.
(31.10) “Who can find a virtuous woman?” Virtuous men are much more common.
11 The heart of her husband doth safely trust in her, so that he shall have no need of spoil.
12 She will do him good and not evil all the days of her life.
13 She seeketh wool, and flax, and worketh willingly with her hands.
14 She is like the merchants’ ships; she bringeth her food from afar.
15 She riseth also while it is yet night, and giveth meat to her household, and a portion to her maidens.
16 She considereth a field, and buyeth it: with the fruit of her hands she planteth a vineyard.
17 She girdeth her loins with strength, and strengtheneth her arms.
18 She perceiveth that her merchandise is good: her candle goeth not out by night.
19 She layeth her hands to the spindle, and her hands hold the distaff.
20 She stretcheth out her hand to the poor; yea, she reacheth forth her hands to the needy.
21 She is not afraid of the snow for her household: for all her household are clothed with scarlet.
22 She maketh herself coverings of tapestry; her clothing is silk and purple.
23 Her husband is known in the gates, when he sitteth among the elders of the land.
24 She maketh fine linen, and selleth it; and delivereth girdles unto the merchant.
25 Strength and honour are her clothing; and she shall rejoice in time to come.
26 She openeth her mouth with wisdom; and in her tongue is the law of kindness.
27 She looketh well to the ways of her household, and eateth not the bread of idleness.
28 Her children arise up, and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praiseth her.
29 Many daughters have done virtuously, but thou excellest them all.
30 Favour is deceitful, and beauty is vain: but a woman that feareth the LORD, she shall be praised.
31 Give her of the fruit of her hands; and let her own works praise her in the gates.
ECCLESIASTES
For that which befalleth the sons of men befalleth beasts; even one thing befalleth them: as the one dieth, so dieth the other; yea, they have all one breath; so that a man hath no preeminence above a beast. — Ecclesiastes 3.19
Ecclesiastes is by far the best book in the Bible. Of course most of the good stuff contradicts what the Bible says elsewhere.
Highlights:
“That which is done is that which shall be done.” 1.9
“There is nothing better for a man, than that he should eat and drink, and that he should make his soul enjoy good in his labour.” 2.24
“To everything there is a season.” 3.1
“There is no good … but for a man to rejoice, and to do good in his life.” 3.12
“Every man should eat and drink, and enjoy the good of all his labour.” 3.13
“For that which befalleth the sons of men befalleth beasts; even one thing befalleth them: as the one dieth, so dieth the other; yea, they have all one breath; so that a man hath no preeminence above a beast.” 3.19
“All go unto one place; all are of the dust, and all turn to dust again.” 3.20
“Who knoweth the spirit of man that goeth upward, and the spirit of the beast that goeth downward to the earth?” 3.21
“There is nothing better, than that a man should rejoice in his own works.” 3.22
“Better is a poor and a wise child than an old and foolish king.” 4.13
“A fool’s voice is known by multitude of words.” 5.3
“It is better to hear the rebuke of the wise, than for a man to hear the song of fools.” 7.5
“I applied mine heart to know, and to search, and to seek out wisdom, and the reason of things.” 7.25
“A man hath no better thing under the sun, than to eat, and to drink, and to be merry.” 8.15
“For to him that is joined to all the living there is hope: for a living dog is better than a dead lion.” 9.4
“For the living know that they shall die: but the dead know not any thing, neither have they any more a reward; for the memory of them is forgotten.” 9.5
“Go thy way, eat thy bread with joy, and drink thy wine with a merry heart.” 9.7
“Whatsoever thy hand findeth to do, do it with thy might; for there is no work, nor dev
ice, nor knowledge, nor wisdom, in the grave, whither thou goest.” 9.10
“The race is not to the swift, nor the battle to the strong, neither yet bread to the wise, nor yet riches to men of understanding, nor yet favour to men of skill; but time and chance happeneth to them all.” 9.11
“Walk in the ways of thine heart, and in the sight of thine eyes.” 11.9
“Of making many books there is no end; and much study is a weariness of the flesh.” 12.12
ECCLESIASTES 1
1 The words of the Preacher, the son of David, king in Jerusalem.
(1.1, 12, 16) “The words of the Preacher, the son of David, king in Jerusalem … I the Preacher was king over Israel in Jerusalem … I am come to great estate, and have gotten more wisdom than all they that have been before me.” The author of Ecclesiastes claims to be the wise, rich son of King David, which is to say, Solomon. He isn’t. Ecclesiastes was written (forged) about six hundred years after Solomon died (if he ever lived, that is).
2 Vanity of vanities, saith the Preacher, vanity of vanities; all is vanity.
(1.2) “Vanity of vanities; all is vanity.”
3 What profit hath a man of all his labour which he taketh under the sun?
4 One generation passeth away, and another generation cometh: but the earth abideth for ever.
(1.4) “The earth abideth for ever.”
147 Will the earth last forever?
5 The sun also ariseth, and the sun goeth down, and hasteth to his place where he arose.
(1.5) “The sun also ariseth, and the sun goeth down, and hasteth to his place where he arose.” Although this verse is interpreted figuratively today, it was taken literally by virtually all Christians until the Copernican revolution, and was used by the Church to condemn Galileo for teaching the heliocentric heresy.
6 The wind goeth toward the south, and turneth about unto the north; it whirleth about continually, and the wind returneth again according to his circuits.
7 All the rivers run into the sea; yet the sea is not full; unto the place from whence the rivers come, thither they return again.
(1.7) “The place from whence the rivers come, thither they return again.” Good description of the water cycle.