The only thing, or should I say person that held up my progress was Cage. With a hand on my shoulder he said,
“You got it in you to make my little girl smile I’ll be fucking grateful brother. She hasn’t given me one of those smiles that light up her face since she found out you weren’t gonna make it.”
The seriousness of his tone had me turning toward him fully. Cage has never asked me for anything before, let alone something as important as making his daughter happy.
“I’m sure she’ll perk up brother, don’t sweat it.” I knew it was a lie as soon as the words left my lips, the look on that sweet girls face told me that, and the accompanying scowl from Cage confirmed it.
“She’s not fucking happy Glock, and that makes me unhappy. That little girl’s gone through enough in her short life not to have a good time on her own goddamned birthday.” Scowling deeper he said, “You know what she told me for when I asked her what she wanted for her birthday?” Shaking my head he adds, “She told me she wanted two of those leather, braided bracelets that have got best friends, or some shit on them. One for her, and one for you. So what does that tell you about how fucking unhappy my little girl is that you aren’t here?”
I go to answer but Cage doesn’t give me the chance.
“What it tells me brother, is my girl wants her best friend here, and that you’re the only one that’s gonna put that light back in her eyes.” Sighing he scuffs the ground with his boot before meeting my eyes again. “I don’t ask you for shit, I know you’ve got your own demon wreaking havoc in that head of yours, I don’t get it and I probably never will because you won’t let anyone in, but today I’m asking you to do this for me, for Lexi.”
The sincerity in his voice, how much he loves his daughter seeps through with every word spoken. Not that there was ever any question about how much Cage adores his only daughter, but today it feels like more, it feels like there’s something else going on I don’t know about.
“I don’t know why my girl latched onto you so hard, but take it like the gift it is because Lexi loving you is a beautiful fucking thing. Might even quiet some of what’s going on up there, brother.” Cage walks off with that final statement hanging between us. What he doesn’t know is Lex already has quieted the monster that threaten to take over sometimes.
Sneaking around behind the rusting swing set, I grab hold of the two individual ropes holding the seat she’s swinging on up. Crouching down quickly I yell,
“Boo,” directly beside her.
Screeching and jumping off the swing Lex turns quickly, almost toppling over as she does. Noticing it’s me clams her mouth shut before she can scold whoever frightened her, and that’s when her tears come in rivers freely flowing down her face.
“G-Glock,” she whispered quietly.
I couldn’t stand to see her cry, so I scooped her up and sat with her under the oak that takes up a good portion of the courtyard for long minutes while she calmed. Rubbing her back I ask,
“Hey, Princess. What’s all the crying about?”
Sniffling sadly she looks up, and I take a swift intake of air when I see the pain in her innocent eyes. Squeezing me tightly, Lex jumps off my lap and sits beside me.
“I was scared, I’m sorry for crying all over you.”
Confused I ask,
“What were you scared about, Princess? There’s nothing for you to be scared about.” Covering her face with her hands Lex mumbles something I don’t quite catch. Pulling her hands away I say, “What was that? I couldn’t hear you with that pretty face buried away like that.”
Blushing she replies,
“I was scared something happened to you,” she still speaks softly, but I hear every word like a knife to the heart. She wasn’t upset because I wasn’t here for her birthday, she was scared I was hurt. She was scared for me.
“Fuck, I mean damn, Princess. I’m okay, everything’s alright now.” Wrapping my arm around her slim shoulder I pull her into my side. This kid, this young girl wrecks me. Lex humbles me with her ability to care about others first, she doesn’t know it yet but that’s a quality sorely lacking in ninety-nine percent of the population.
Punching me in the arm, and let’s be honest, Lex is tiny so it barely registers but I look at her in mock shock nonetheless, she snaps,
“I can see that, you are sitting here you know.” Chuckling at her waspish tone earns me another hit, but I can’t control the snort that follows. Shit, this kid is funny. “Don’t you laugh at me Glock, it’s not funny. I didn’t know if you got hit by some dumb car driver, or worse. No one would tell me where you were, and I didn’t think you were coming back, so don’t laugh.”
Before she has a chance to stomp off, because that’s what Lex does when she get pissed, I grab her wrist pulling her back down.
“I don’t know if I’m supposed to tell you or not, but I will anyway. Some cop pulled me over, and chucked me in lock up. I didn’t stay away on purpose Princess, I wouldn’t do that.”
I know she believes me by the clench of her jaw, and the angry set of her eyes.
“Why did he do that? You weren’t doing anything wrong were you?”
I’m not going to tell Lex he tried to pin me with concealed firearms charges, that’s not something she needs to know, so I say,
“Nah, when have you ever known me to do anything wrong?”
Lex’s giggle lightens my heart, and puts a huge grin on my face and hers. Digging in her pocket her voice turns serious again,
“I got something for you. Well, actually my dad did but I asked for it.” Pulling a black leather strap out of her pocket she begins wrapping it around my wrist explaining as she does. “I didn’t know what to ask for, for my birthday until I saw Ade making these for her and Uncle Max, when I saw them I knew they were exactly what I wanted, so dad asked her to make me these ones.”
Looking down at the leather I see the words, ‘Chosen One’ woven through the multiple leather strands in silver beads. I can’t say the bracelet is all that masculine, and I’m pretty sure I’m going to be given a whole lot of shit over wearing it, but the hopeful smile, and the thoughtfulness of Lex’s gift has me not giving the first shit what my brothers say.
Hugging her close again I ask,
“I love it, Princess. What does yours say?” Extending her wrist for me to see, I turn it over and read aloud, “Honored One.” The breath stills in my chest, and I can honestly say I’m the honored one, not her.
Lex will never know what giving me that bracelet meant to me. I’ve never taken it off, and I never will, but all that aside, that day Lex taught me something I hadn’t learnt in my twenty-four years to date; how to truly love another person. Up until then I believed I knew what love was, I mean I loved Sheila and Vic, I loved my brothers, Rob, but I had no idea I was capable of loving the way I loved Lex in that moment in time. And I haven’t loved anyone else since with the intensity that I love her, I never will.
My love for her has matured into something else entirely, sure, but the bones of it, the foundation of why I love her is the same. Her compassion, empathy, consideration of others before herself, the way she devotes her all to the people she loves and holds an MC together with her tiny hands flaws me. It’s not that the MC is falling apart, not at all we’re stronger than ever, but Lex is the glue that brings everyone together, keeps us rooted and focused on what’s important; family.
Whether it’s because she comes from a fucked up start, or because she sees we all come from that same place and need the reminder from time-to-time that family comes first I don’t know, but Lex is the one that has us sitting around long ass tables every Sunday for dinner. Lex is the one that makes sure every brothers’ birthday, their kids graduations and events are made into milestones, parties, and celebrations. And Lex is the one who acts as confidant for nearly everyone involved with the MC. Doesn’t matter old lady, brother, kids, distant relative, Lex is happy to be an ear or shoulder to them all.
Everything I
love about her is also everything I hate about her. I hate it because it’s what makes doing this so much harder. If Lex was a raving bitch, I wouldn’t think twice about giving her the space she wants, but she isn’t, and I hate that I’m going to lose the most amazing woman I’ve ever had the privilege of knowing, permanently. I have to walk away knowing the mark she’s left on my soul won’t ever lessen, and my heart will never heal from the pain I’m about to put it through.
Watching her walk toward my bike, for what’s probably the last time is bitter sweet. As much as I want her riding behind me, and I do because that’s the only reason I’ve installed a bitch seat to begin with, her tits pressed against my back, the wind whipping around us like a humid blanket, I also don’t. I don’t because that signifies we’re nearly done, that what we could have been is nearly over.
Shaking the depression that’s settling on my heart free, I straddle my bike and extend my hand to her.
“Climb on, Princess. Let’s ride.”
CHAPTER FOUR
Alexis
“They say the most important thing in a relationship is communication.
So, I would like to take this opportunity to communicate my feelings;
Fuck You!”
- Rotten eCards
Sitting behind Glock as we cruise up the I90 is perfect. I’ve always loved riding with him ever since I was a little girl, but it wasn’t until I was sixteen I really understood how good it felt to sit behind a man in control of hundreds of pounds of metal, chrome, and power.
The vibration of the bike between your legs is a heady feeling. It’s intensely erotic, and purely sexual in nature when it’s the man you love control the magnificent beast of machine you’re travelling at eighty miles an hour on. Glock might not take chances with me on the back of his bike, but he doesn’t drive like an old man either. He drives like he respects his bike, because he does, all the brothers do, and he drives like he respects who’s riding with him. But the best part of riding with Glock is knowing no one else ever has.
Sure, women have tried, asked, all but begged, he hasn’t obliged however. He’s always quick to turn them down, tell them no and that’s what makes me riding with him all the more special. I’ve never told him how much I appreciate him saving this for us, one of the things only we do together, and after today if I don’t tell him I know I’ll never have a chance. After today I have to get used to the idea of him opening up the seat on the back of his bike to other women, because it was after all me that asked him to give me space.
If I’m honest with myself, I don’t want to see another woman wrapped around him, hanging all over him, I’ve had to see that all too often at Rough shod. While I might not be legal age to drink yet, I’ve been working at Rough Shod Wednesday through Sunday since the day I turned eighteen. It took some convincing to get dad to agree to it, but in the end he caved like he usually does when it comes to me.
I don’t serve drinks, I bus tables, waitress, clean, and restock, it’s tiring, the tips are bad, and my back aches after every shift, but I love it regardless of all that. The best part is I don’t run into half the trouble when it comes to groping hands, wandering eyes, and over-eager patrons that the other waitresses do. Anyone who knows my dad, my grandpa’s, or the MC knows better than to try anything with me. But most of all, anyone who knows Glock knows better than to mess with me on shift. It doesn’t make me popular with the other waitresses, and my tips suffer for it, but I could care less, I’m there to work not make friends.
Glock made his take on men pawing at me very clear when one Friday night, a highly intoxicated newbie decided it would be a good idea to grab my ass, slapping it for good measure when he released me. What he didn’t see as all this was taking place was the glacial glare coming from my best friend, and self-appointed protector.
Apparently Glock was livid, it took Dagger, Arrow, and Tank to hold him back until he cooled off a degree or two. I can also tell you that was the first, and last time I’ve been scared at work, so what Glock did next worked a treat. Grabbing the man by the back of his shirt, Glock slammed him face first into the table he was sitting at.
Turning to me he said sharply,
“Go back and sit with Tank, Princess, I’ll be there in a minute.” I didn’t argue with him, I know all too well not to when he’s in that kind of mood.
Fisting the collar of the man’s shirt, Glock pulled him an inch or two off the table and leaned down saying,
“You like the feel of that?” Not waiting for his response Glock went on. “I fucking hope you did, because that’s the last time you’ll have the use of your fucking hands.” Pushing him harshly back down onto the unforgiving timber he adds, “You touch what doesn’t belong to you again and you won’t be breathing, so consider this me going easy on you asshole.”
Glock made true on his promise that night. When I saw the man who had dared to touch me at Mo’s the next morning he was sporting two bandaged hands, and what looked to me like a broken nose. I outwardly still cringe at the memory, but I can’t help the shiver of excitement it gives me to know Glock defended me too. It probably makes me some kind of weirdo, that Glock turning into a hulking caveman turns me on, but I won’t lie, it does.
Taking the last turn on our trip to a little lake we found once by accident, Glock calls out over the rushing wind,
“You okay back there, Princess.”
In response I squeeze his middle tightly and pat his abs. His rock solid, cut, perfectly formed abs mind you. It’s a signal we developed early on, you can barely hear a thing when riding, and we don’t wear helmets with intercoms, so it was important for us to make up a system that worked for us. A squeeze and pat means I’m fine, a pinch to his thigh means slow down, and if I grab his bicep he know to pull over. I’ve never used the latter two signals and can feel his deep laugh vibrate through his chest at my sign of contentment.
The lake sparkles like a jewel buried in a thicket of dense trees. There’s a grassed section on one arc of the lake, but the rest is relatively private surrounded by gorgeous oak, and brush, with a few rocks jutting out far enough into the water to make them the perfect place to lie in the sun, something I’ve done many times.
Today it feels as if there’s greater meaning to coming here, that it’s the perfect end to us, or what used to be us. Only one other time in my memory has it been more important that Glock bring me here. One time I wish did mar the memory of how wonderful and special this place would always be to me. That day was the day Glock told me he had his first serious girlfriend.
Why he thought it essential to bring me all the way out here, it’s a good forty minute ride, I don’t know. I would have preferred he told me at home where I had a choice to run to my room and hide, but I suppose that’s my answer right there isn’t it? He didn’t want me to be able to run, to turn off to what he was telling me. Glock wanted me to know what he was telling me was important, and give me the chance to ask questions, for him to tell me nothing would change between us. But it did…everything changed for us after that day. Not for long, but for about six months Glock wasn’t the friend I knew, or the man I loved.
Two years earlier…
Stretching my legs out on the sun warmed rock, I turn to Glock and ask with a yawn,
“What was the urgency, you said you had to talk to me, and it had to be today?”
When I got the text from Glock earlier that said he’d be picking me up in half an hour I was thrilled. Summer was always boring hanging around the house with my brothers and their annoying friends. At seventeen I was too old to be sitting around the house, never going anywhere, but being me, the daughter of a patch wearing member of an MC, and the granddaughter of the club President, there weren’t a lot of people throwing their hands up to be my friend, so most of the time I found myself stuck at home.
With Wheels being ten, and Cody being twelve, the droning monotony of video games, stepping on Lego, and tripping over skateboards was a way of life for me. And as much as
I love those two twerps, and I do, I’d had about all I could handle of the within three days of summer break, so Glock’s invitation to go out for a ride was more than welcome and gratefully accepted…I should have known it was too good to be true.
Sitting down beside me, Glock leans back on his outstretched hands and turns his face up to catch the sun, and in that moment I’m struck all over again by how handsome he is. Beautiful is too feminine a word to describe Glock, he’s edgier than that, darker, and broodier. No beautiful doesn’t suit him at all, but neither does handsome, I’m going to have to think of a better word I muse.
Glock has changed since I first met him. He’s gone from a young man, still growing into his body, to a fully grown prime specimen of man. All that wind tousled light brown hair almost covering his eyes, his clear, bright sky blue eyes, so like my own it’s frightening. Glock’s six-foot-three framed filled out nicely, more than nicely, the man is ripped. He’s got muscles in places I didn’t think muscles grew, along with a five o’clock shadow he rocks, big time.
Broken: A Devil's Spawn MC Novel Page 4