18 Months

by Samantha Boyette

  Hannah reached over and pulled my hand from my mouth, twisting her fingers with mine. “We already told my parents. You said yourself that people talk in a town like this.”

  I blew out a breath and turned to her with a grin. “Your dad took it better than I expected.”

  “We’ll see.” She shook her head. “He’s good at keeping his cool. I’m not really looking forward to going home later.”

  “Do you regret telling them?” I found myself hoping she didn’t. It had felt liberating to tell her parents the truth.

  “Not at all.” She lifted my fingers to her lips. “I guess I never thought about how much would change by coming out.”

  “No more sleepovers at your place.” I grinned. Her mom had made that abundantly clear.

  She nodded, staring out through the windshield. “Maybe we shouldn’t tell your parents.”

  I laughed. “Like your parents would let you stay over here.”

  “True.” She turned to me with a wicked grin. “I guess we are going to have to be more creative when it comes to finding alone time.”

  I blushed at the implication, but nodded. “I suppose so.” I let go of her hand and took a deep breath. “Let’s get this over with.”

  *

  I shifted uneasily on the edge of the couch as my parents did the same on the love seat. None of us were prepared for the conversation we were having. Hannah took my hand, squeezing it gently. The room felt overwhelmingly hot and I wondered vaguely why we had chosen to come out in the summer. At least Hannah’s house had been air conditioned.

  Dad cleared his throat. “So, you two are an item then?”

  “Yes.” I held Hannah’s hand tightly as if that would prove it. “For a few months now.”

  Mom stood, her hand over her mouth, shaking her head. “A few months? So every time we let Hannah sleep over…” She didn’t need to finish her sentence for me to realize where her mind had gone.

  I blushed madly. “No, Mom. Don’t be gross.” It hadn’t been every time Hannah stayed over. We hadn’t even had sex until recently.

  “I’m glad you’re finally telling us.” Dad took Mom’s hand, pulling her back down to the love seat. “I know it must be hard.”

  I managed a small smile and nodded.

  Mom shook her head again. “Are you sure about this? Hannah, you’re a great girl and I’ve enjoyed getting to know you, but I don’t think Alissa is a lesbian. Alissa, have you thought this through? What are people going to think?”

  I clenched my teeth. I wished just once she could not be concerned about what people were going to think.

  “No offense.” Hannah’s tone was sharp. “But I think people will get over it.”

  I smiled at Hannah, so glad we had agreed to do this together. It hadn’t gone much better at her place, but at least both her parents made a half-hearted effort to understand.

  Mom bit her lip. “I’m sorry, but I can’t support this.”

  “Mom,” I said at the same time Dad said, “Linda!”

  “I’m sorry, it just isn’t the way things are supposed to be.” Mom wrung her hands. “Hannah, you’re a sweet girl, and you’re both pretty. I’m sure you’ll find nice boys in the long run.”

  Dad squeezed Mom’s hand, momentarily shutting her up. “It’s going to take a little getting used to, honey, but if this is what you want then we support you.”

  Mom bit her lip. She wanted to argue more, but she kept her mouth shut.

  “Thanks, Dad.” I stood and went to hug him. “I love you.”

  “We love you too,” Dad said.

  I gave Mom a stiff hug that she returned just as stiffly. A few minutes later, Hannah and I were outside, practically running for her car. Summer sun beat down on my bare arms and legs and my skirt rustled in the breeze just before I settled into the passenger seat. As Hannah pulled away from the curb, I put a hand on the bare, smooth skin just below her shorts and closed my eyes, feeling like a weight had been lifted from my shoulders.

  It settled right back on my shoulders as we approached the country club. I wasn’t done with my coming out yet. When we pulled into the parking lot, Hannah put the car in park, but didn’t shut it off, letting the air conditioning continue to fill the car.

  “Are you sure you want to do this right now?” She leaned her head back against the seat, looking at me. Her dark hair framed her face, stopping just past her bare shoulders. When I didn’t answer right away, she bit her lip.

  I smiled. “You are so friggin’ gorgeous, you know?” She grinned at me and I leaned in to kiss her, getting carried away in the moment as my hand found her firm, flat stomach and her hand brushed aside my hair to rest on my neck. We were both breathing heavily when I finally pulled away. “I want to do this—” I stopped, heart dropping as I stared out the front window.

  Madison and Genny stared back at me, both of them with expressions somewhere between shock and disgust. I scrambled to get out of the car, almost forgetting to unbuckle my seat belt in my hurry.

  “What the hell, Alissa?” Madison glared as I got out of the car and shut the door behind me.

  “Madison.” I whined even though I tried not to. “I was just coming to find you.” I heard Hannah get out of the car.

  “That is just so wrong,” Genny said with a smirk. “You seriously are some kind of messed up lesbian, aren’t you?” Her smirk faded away. “Oh, God, we’ve changed in front of you.”

  “I’m sure there wasn’t much to look at,” Hannah quipped and I shot her a look. She shrugged and leaned back against the car.

  “Are you a lesbian?” Madison asked, her eyes boring into me. Unable to speak, I nodded. Madison gave a short bark of laughter. “Jesus, after all we’ve done to help you fit in and you go and do this?” She shook her head, backing away. “Come on, Genny, let’s get to the pool.”

  Genny shook her head and turned to follow her with a muttered, “Gross.”

  I bit my lip, holding back tears as I climbed into Hannah’s car. She climbed in beside me, reaching to take my hand. I shook her off, keeping my eyes trained out the window. “Just drive somewhere, okay?”

  I held back my tears until Hannah had parked the car at the end of a shady dead-end street. Only then did I let her pull me into a hug and let myself cry. It was short though. Hannah rubbed my back, soothing away my sadness and drying my tears.

  “It’s going to be okay,” Hannah said.

  I pulled away, wiping at my eyes. “I know.” I laughed. “I told you they weren’t going to be okay with me.”

  “And I told you they aren’t worth your time.” Hannah tucked my hair behind my ear. “Screw them.”

  “Yeah.” I let out a long breath. “Screw them.” I managed a small smile. “What do we do now? I don’t really want to go back to my place.”

  Hannah winced. “Yeah, I don’t want to go home either.”

  “Still think telling everyone was the right thing to do?”

  “Yes.” Hannah nodded. “Our parents will come around.”

  “And never leave us alone in a room again,” I teased, running my fingers up her thigh and raising an eyebrow at her.

  Hannah laughed. She pushed my hand away and took the steering wheel. “Well then, I guess I know what we need to do now.” She began backing the car up.

  “Where are we going?” I asked. I shut off the air conditioning and opened the window. The air was warm, but it felt good on my face.

  “We need to find somewhere to be alone this summer, don’t we?”

  I smiled. “I think I know just the place.”

  Chapter Twenty-two

  Nick met me at my locker right after school. The afternoon had dragged. I’d been paired with Madison during English and we’d probably failed the assignment since she’d spent the whole time leaning away from me like I had the plague. Hannah was right, I never should have let girls like her stop me from being myself. It made me miss Hannah even more. She would have made some smart remark that made the whole thing fun
ny instead of sad.

  As we walked to the parking lot, I filled Nick in on the conversation with Rachel.

  “I think she could have sent the notes.” Nick opened the driver’s side door of his truck and tossed his bag in behind his seat. “Rachel always acts like she has a couple screws loose to me. I wouldn’t put this past her.”

  “But what does that mean?” I hauled myself up into the truck. Nick climbed in the driver’s side and started the engine. “Is it all just a mean joke? And what about Garrett? He seemed pissed off enough to do it.”

  Nick snorted. “Oh, Garrett would totally do it.” He looked both ways and we pulled out of the parking lot. “That kid has the worst temper of anyone I know.” As we turned onto Main Street, he glanced at me. “Maybe they took Hannah.”

  My body went cold at hearing him voice my fears. “And what, forced her to call home and say she was in Chicago?”

  Nick smirked at the idea. “It could happen.”

  “No, they’re just kids from school. They aren’t capable of this.” I bit my nail, hoping I was right.

  “They’re a couple of loony kids from school. How many times do you hear about some teenager losing it and shooting up a school or something?” He shrugged. “I don’t really think the idea of them taking Hannah is too farfetched.”

  I sat silent and tense as Nick wound through town to Brandon’s house. Nick had asked around until he found out Brandon rented a small apartment with another guy on 5th Street. I worried at my thumbnail, chewing off the tip as I wondered if Rachel or Garrett could have kidnapped Hannah. Were they really that angry?

  We pulled to a stop in front of what must have once been a stunning home. Now the huge place was in need of a fresh coat of paint and some real care. The once majestic front porch listed to the side. Toys and trash littered the area around the foundation. To the left of the porch a set of stairs led down to a basement apartment. I pitied whoever lived down there.

  “Nice place,” I said dryly. I slammed my door and stepped away. Nick followed a moment behind.

  “I knew a kid who lived here when we were little.” Nick adjusted his hoodie, zipping it up all the way to his neck. His dark eyes squinted as he took in the leaning porch. “It wasn’t much nicer back then.”

  “It could be such a nice house.” I ran my hand across the worn banister as we climbed the steps. They groaned under our weight, but held firm.

  “Cheaper to let it go to crap and rent it to people who could care less, I guess.”

  We opened the thick, white front door and stepped into a dimly lit hallway. Decorative globe lights hung from the ceiling, amber glass suggested memories of a better time. Music played somewhere, a child was crying, and the tinny sound of TV voices played over it all. I glanced at Nick.

  “What apartment?”

  “Upstairs, number five.”

  We started up the stairs. I let my hand trail over the nicked banister. The wood was stained dark, but much like the stairs, it had seen better days. On the landing, we took in the doors in front of us, apartments four through six.

  Nick glanced at me, then took the lead to the door marked five. He knocked. Someone was playing the drums inside at a frenzied rate. As we waited a red-haired woman stepped out of apartment six, locking the door behind her. She looked at us as Nick knocked again.

  “He won’t hear you while he’s drumming,” the woman said. “He never hears me ask him to shut the hell up.” She stepped up in front of us and waited for a lull in the drumming and then pounded on the door. A cymbal clanged once. “There, he’ll come around now.” She smiled at us and headed down the stairs.

  Sure enough, we heard footsteps behind the door. Nick and I exchanged a look as we waited. A moment later, the door swung inward and Brandon’s sleepy eyes peered out at us. He looked pretty much like I remembered him, hair cut just long enough to fall over his eyes, wide lips, and a sallow complexion. He wore a tight gray T-shirt under a black jacket, and a leather cord knotted around his neck like a choker.

  “Yeah?” His eyes drifted from me to Nick and back. “Can I help you?”

  “We wanted to ask you about Lana Meyers.”

  His expression clouded, but he didn’t close the door. Instead, he leaned against it, balancing with his hand on the knob. “You two look a little young to be cops. I don’t see any pitchforks, so I doubt you’re here to cause trouble. Why do you want to talk to me?”

  “Because you were probably the last person to see her alive,” Nick said. For a moment, the two guys stared at each other. Nick’s jaw twitched, but he didn’t blink.

  Finally, Brandon nodded, blinking slowly. “Yeah, I probably was. Still not sure what that has to do with you being at my apartment.”

  “We think whoever took Lana might have taken another girl last week.” I stepped closer. “Can you please just tell us a bit about what happened when you picked up Lana?”

  His eyes held mine. I tried not to blink. Finally, he must have seen something in me that he liked. He broke into a lazy half-smile and he stepped aside. “By all means, come on in.”

  He turned and walked from the door without waiting for us. We glanced at each other again and stepped inside. I let Nick close the door. A green velvet couch sat against one wall, its arms pockmarked with tears and cigarette burns. A round, woven rug filled up most of the living room, its multiple colors each faded to a different shade of brown-gray. Band posters were hung on the paneled walls and blankets hung over the two windows.

  “It isn’t much. But it’s cheap and my old man doesn’t live here,” Brandon said.

  He sank into the green couch, his long legs straight out in front of him. Nick moved beer bottles to perch on the edge of a metal coffee table and I sat on an old folding chair. A TV played in the next apartment.

  “What can you tell us about seeing Lana that night?” I leaned forward with my elbows on my knees.

  “I can tell you I wish I never picked her ass up.” Brandon scratched the back of his head, squinting at me.

  “Why did you?” Nick asked. I liked how intensely he watched Brandon. It was good to know he was as involved in all this as I was.

  “I knew her type.” Brandon shrugged. “I talked to her a few times at parties and stuff. We were a lot alike.”

  “How so?” I asked.

  “Both of us had rotten dads for one thing. I know hers was all religious and mine never stepped foot in church, but at the core they were both no good.”

  “Did she tell you that?” I was surprised. I hadn’t known much about Lana’s parents until right after we’d broken up. She’d asked me to meet her in the gully and shown me a bruise on her back as proof that I’d ruined her life by making her take the fall for me.

  “A bit.” Brandon rubbed his hands together. “My old man was the sort to knock me around whenever the mood hit. Never once apologized for it. We never even talked about it. It was just me and him so when I was old enough, I started staying out more than I was at home. Lana was the same way. I saw a mark on her back once when she bent over and I was drunk enough to say something. Turned out her dad thought God chose his punishments. Sometimes God thought she needed a switching.”

  Nick glanced at me. I shook my head. “I never realized.”

  “I don’t think she talked about it much.” Brandon shrugged. “Anyway, so I knew we were alike. Maybe we didn’t do so good in school and got in a little trouble here and there, but we were good people.”

  “So how did the cops find out you picked her up?”

  Brandon sighed. “I was leaving a shift at the grocery store and heading to a friend’s house. She was walking along the road out of town. It was dark so I pulled over. We were right by the Crossroads Diner. I guess someone there saw us.”

  “So what happened?” Nick asked.

  “I offered her a ride. Walking along that road at night is stupid because it’s dark as hell.”

  “You guys were that close?” I asked.

  “Not really.” B
randon fiddled nervously with the string around his neck. “But I knew her and offering a ride seemed like the right thing to do. She said she was going to Indigo Falls and that would have taken all damn night to walk. I asked her why she was going there. I figured she was meeting a friend or something, but she just said she’d been in a fight with her parents.”

  “She didn’t say anything about where she was going after Indigo Falls?” I asked.

  “Nah. Like I said, we talked about her parents being upset with her and then I dropped her off at the bus station. It was late and I drove right home after letting her out.” Brandon played with a silver ring on his right hand as he spoke. His twisted and pulled it, looking up from his hands as he finished. “I told the cops all this. I don’t know how I can help you.”

  “Did she tell you why they were upset?” I ventured.

  Brandon grinned stupidly. “Yeah, ‘cause she was a lesbian. I asked her if she had a girlfriend. You know, ‘cause that stuff’s pretty hot.” He grinned at Nick.

  “Of course.” Nick nodded. His tone was flat though, and Brandon looked back at his hands.

  “Anyway. She said there had been some girl, but that she turned out to be a bitch who screwed her over.”

  I winced at the words. I’d never heard anyone put it so plainly. I’d known I treated Lana badly and hurt her, but to hear that she called me a bitch still stung, even though I knew I had no right to be upset.

  “So why didn’t the cops believe you?” Something about the way he refused to make eye contact for more than a moment made me feel like he was lying about something.

  Brandon smirked, but there was no humor in it. He tugged at the cord around his neck. “Said I was some sort of pervert because I still hung out with high school kids. I’d only just turned twenty back then. It isn’t like this town is so big that all my friends graduated with me. Plenty of them were still in school. Most of the friends I graduated with were off at college. So yeah, I partied with high school kids and I went to football games and I eyed up the cheerleaders. You tell me the middle-aged men standing around to cheer on their sons aren’t thinking how hot those girls are too.”