And maybe Janessa had just been a side note to that diversion.
She shook herself. What did it matter anyway? As soon as she had her details worked out, she would be moving on, too. Whatever Micah Brody chose to do with his life was really none of her concern.
In an attempt to refocus her thoughts, she scanned the crimson-, gold-and purple-streaked sky and envisioned herself in Seattle. But somehow, all she could conjure was a picture of gray skies and endless rain. Sighing, she tuned back in to the conversations at the table.
Andra was lamenting to Hank about her missed opportunity to rent the candy kitchen, since she hadn’t found any other suitable place in town. Adam and Courtney debated about which of the several bowls of chili they had in front of them was the tastiest. And Mama was describing her vision for redecorating the Circle-O ranch house to Mr. Bloom, who seemed to be receiving her ideas with enthusiasm.
As Janessa took a bite of chili and tried to navigate this conversational landscape, her phone beeped, announcing a text. She shoved her bowl aside and removed her phone from her purse.
Hana. Her stomach knotted like a kaiser roll. Ever since the “luxury apartment” had fallen through, her future roommate had gotten quirkier with each communication. Bracing herself, Janessa read the message.
I found a 1 bdrm apartment 4 $750 a month!
One bedroom? Maybe she could live with that. She typed back, Gr8.
A moment later, another text came through.
Not the best naybrhood, bt it seems safe enuf.
Seems? She read on.
Jst 1 ctch. We’ll hav2 gt a c@.
A cat? She texted back. No prob. I lov c@s. Then she thought about it. Y? R thr mice?
No.
She raised a finger to type Gud, but before she could, another message came through.
Bigr.
Bigger? Bigger than mice? What did this apartment have? Wolverines?
She responded. U mean u found us an apartment that has RATS?
The escalating pitch of Andra’s voice shifted Janessa’s attention from her screen. “Cynthia and Skylar almost have their new kitchen finished.” She shook her head, eliciting an empathetic look from Hank. “Then their old space will finally be ready for the dentist to move in.”
Looking down again, Janessa breathed fire at her suddenly silent phone. She needed to know if she should readjust her thinking to accommodate the kind of roomies who didn’t pay rent.
“You know what this town needs?” Courtney spoke through a mouthful of chili. “A bakery.”
A round of agreement circled the table.
Andra clicked her tongue. “If that dentist hadn’t come along, someone could have turned the candy kitchen into a great little bakery café. Don’t tell Joe, but we could use an alternative to the diner in this town.”
Huffing out exasperation, Janessa glanced up to see Courtney hand Adam her chili bowl.
“Get the five-star this time, honey.”
“Seriously, Court.” Janessa arched a brow at her sister-in-law as she impatiently typed U still there? into her phone. “That’s your fourth bowl, and you’ve gotten it hotter every time. At this rate, we’re going to have to call the fire department.”
When there was no response, Janessa looked up, catching a meaningful exchange between Courtney and Adam.
Lowering her phone, she narrowed her eyes. “What are you guys up to?”
Adam took in a long breath, then cleared his throat. “Does anyone know the population of Thornton Springs?”
The question completely diverted Janessa’s attention from her worries about rodents. “Weird time for a geography lesson, bro.”
“I know.” Owen glanced at Keely like he hoped this would impress her. “Somewhere in the neighborhood of twenty-five hundred.”
Adam nodded. “Twenty-six seventeen to be exact.”
Mama had stopped talking about lace curtains and was regarding Adam and Courtney with a look of restrained suspicion. “What are you getting at, honey?”
Janessa’s phone beeped again, but she set it facedown next to her chili.
A roguish smile crept onto Adam’s face as he traded another look with Courtney. “We want you all to be the first to know that sometime in April, the population will be increasing to twenty-six eighteen.”
The table fell silent for a moment, then Janessa shrieked. “I’m going to be an aunt!”
All at once, Adam and Courtney were caught up in a whirlwind of congratulations, back slapping and hugs.
Janessa jumped to her feet and ran around the table, throwing herself into what felt like a giant group embrace. She took a step back, allowing the news to settle. This was amazing...and terrible. With a hurricane force, the deeper implications of this surprising turn of events hit. Her family was going to go on living, with a new baby and everything, and she’d be a million miles away.
Okay, not quite a million, but it might as well be. She blinked back a smorgasbord of emotions that threatened to overwhelm her. How, in all her planning, had she not anticipated this?
Feeling suddenly wiped out, she stepped toward the group of women encircling Courtney and discussing possible baby shower dates. She tugged at Andra’s arm. “I think I’m going to call it a night.”
Andra’s face fell. “You’re not staying for the fireworks?”
She shook her head. “I’m really not in a fireworks kind of mood. Will you tell everyone good-night for me?”
After Andra agreed and returned to the debate over gender-neutral shower themes, Janessa made her way around the table to retrieve her abandoned phone. Numbly, she picked it up and remembered the unread message. She clicked it on and read.
I’ve changd my mind. I can’t liv w sum1 as moody n unpredictable as u.
Her stomach plummeted into her handcrafted black leather roper boots. What on earth did Hana mean by that? She read on.
You’ll hav2 fnd sum1 else 2 do yr legwork 4 u, Miss Hard-2-please.
Hard to please? Confusion slapped her like a cold gust of wind. She started to type a response, then stopped. Instead, her eyes turned upward and she mouthed Thank You.
She was off the hook. She’d been released from the obligation to live with a person who was clearly not a good match for her. Relief seeped through her veins.
The relief lasted about a second before reality burst through her carefully constructed dam of denial. Now not only did she not have an apartment, but she didn’t have a roommate, either. If the best her budget would allow was one half of a rat-infested one-bedroom in a questionable neighborhood, it was clear that she couldn’t afford to live by herself. She looked up again. I’m giving this one to You, Lord.
On the heels of that thought, she swiveled around and ran smack into a solid pillar of blue plaid cowboy shirt. Looking up into Micah’s startlingly cerulean eyes, she froze.
For a moment, he looked as surprised as she felt. Then he took a step back and arched a brow at the ongoing hullabaloo behind her. “What’s going on?”
Feeling a heat wave wash her cheeks, she glanced behind him, relieved that there was no sign of Carly.
She forced a guarded smile. “Turns out I’m going to be an aunt.”
As they exchanged congratulations, over the new family member for her and the rodeo win for him, Janessa puzzled over what he was doing there. Had he sought her out to finish the conversation she’d cut short last night during the parade? Now that she was calmer she’d at least be able to listen, but that didn’t mean she could let her defenses down.
Remembering what Carly had told her, she felt the painfully familiar sting of loss. As much as she had thought she was getting closer to Micah over the past few weeks, she’d been wrong to think she really knew him. Maybe everything was a sport to him—rodeos, relationships, keeping his da
d at arm’s length.
But if Micah had Carly, and God only knew how many other women, willing to play the game on his terms, why would he even bother with Janessa? And why couldn’t she just let go?
She felt like a bull rider, struggling to hang on to the bull rope even after getting bucked off. And the bull was bucking so hard, she couldn’t find the ground. The smart thing would be to just let go, but that felt dangerous, too. So there she was just hanging on with her feet, and her heart dragging in the dirt.
With a jolt, she realized that he was eyeing her expectantly. She forced her voice out past a lump that had formed in her throat. “So I guess you won the deal. So much for me getting to drive your truck.” She wanted to sound worldly and aloof, but her forced lightheartedness sounded as disingenuous as it felt.
“You know...” He leaned in slightly to be heard over the noise around them. “We never shook on it. I can’t really expect you to stay here because of that...”
Disappointment coursed through her. She wanted him to prod her about coming through on her end of the deal even though she’d never actually agreed to it. Suddenly, a part of her wished that she had.
She shrugged. “It wouldn’t matter now anyway.” Her attempt at sounding nonchalant came out sounding decidedly...well...chalant. “I don’t need a new car now that I have Old Blue. I mean, what’s wrong with driving a vintage truck around?”
The corners of his mouth curved down in contemplation. “Nothing that I can see.”
She swallowed so hard it made her throat hurt. She had to make it clear that she considered his fixing her truck to be a job he’d done for her, not a gift. She balled up her fists to keep her hands from shaking. Then they spoke simultaneously.
“You’ll have to let me know—”
“I just wanted to tell you—”
“Janessa!”
Startled, she looked past Micah to see Tandy hurrying down the crowded midway, waving something that looked like a sheet of white paper.
Janessa exchanged a look of confusion with Micah, then moved around him to meet Tandy at the entrance to the picnic area.
Mama was at her side in an instant. “What is it, Tandy?”
Catching her breath, Tandy clutched what Janessa could now see was a large envelope. “I went to the Bar-G to feed the dogs and grab the mail. I’m glad I did, because look what was in it.”
She presented the envelope to Janessa as people in the immediate area hushed each other and started to crowd around or shift in their seats to get a better view.
Reaching out to take it, Janessa stared at the upper left-hand corner, where a fancy scroll revealed the sender.
Mama put her hands to her cheeks and gasped, then lifted her head to announce, “It’s from her school!”
A clatter rose up from the crowd, followed by another round of shushes. Suddenly, everything was quiet except the clanking from the barbecue pit and the distant happy shrieks of people riding the Tilt-A-Whirl or the Ferris wheel. Everyone leaned in, waiting for her to open it.
Her heart beat like a galloping steed as she gaped at the envelope in her hands. This wasn’t the skinny kind that delivers college rejections. This was the big fat kind. The kind that contains notices of acceptance.
With shaky hands she pealed back the flap, unable to hold in the tears that had conspired to totally humiliate her in front of a good percentage of the town. She pulled out a stack of crisp white papers, and read from the top one. “‘Dear Miss Greene, We are pleased to inform you...’”
The crowd around her broke into whooping and shouting, as the words on the page faded to a gray blur. She’d done it. She’d gotten accepted into Le Cordon Bleu.
As people hugged and congratulated her, she searched the crowd through tear-filled eyes. Micah stood on the outskirts, shifting from one foot to the other and looking down. When his eyes finally met hers, he smiled sadly and turned to leave.
Part of her wanted to run after him and part of her wanted to just let him go. It was impossible at the moment to tell which part had her best interests at heart.
Chapter 11
Micah walked out onto the carnival midway feeling worse than he’d ever felt in his life. For a guy who’d lost his mom as a kid and had been stomped on by a two thousand pound bull that was saying a lot.
Since there really wasn’t any reason for him to stick around the fairgrounds now, he started for the parking lot behind the horse barn. Looking up at the big Montana sky that was slipping toward sundown, he reflected on all the things he’d learned about himself since coming to Thornton Springs. Too bad one of the most important lessons had come to him too late.
He’d been all set last night to tell Janessa how wrong he’d been about not wanting a serious relationship. That she’d been right—what he’d said to her about being afraid of losing someone like she’d lost her daddy applied to him, too. That was exactly why he’d been running all this time. He couldn’t stand the thought of getting hurt again.
He had wanted to tell her that he was hoping she might feel the same. And that she might reconsider her options.
Then he’d gotten distracted by the arrival of his dad and Carly, which couldn’t have come at a worse time. And when Janessa had gotten upset, he had figured he should wait until after the rodeo to talk to her. It was never good to try to talk to someone about anything serious right before they competed—a fact that had come in handy for both him and his dad over the years. Since he’d been perpetually gearing up for the next event in the next town, they had always put off talking about the heavy stuff. The result was a lifetime of issues that had never gotten dealt with. No wonder he had ultimately needed to get untangled from his knotted-up rope of a life.
After the rodeo and the award ceremony, he had kept busy getting the horses back to the ranch, but had gone looking for Janessa tonight. He’d wanted to take one more crack at having that talk with her. Why had he put it off? Now that she knew she’d been accepted into her school, any hope he’d had of her changing her plans was shot.
Not that he wasn’t happy for her. He was. She had wanted to go to that school long before he had even met her. Why should he expect her to stay here just for him? No, it was best for him to step back and let her get on with her life.
He approached the barn, shaking his head at life’s ironies. In just a few short weeks, he’d helped Owen become confident enough to win the girl of his dreams, and he himself had become what Owen had been when they’d first met. A one-woman kind of guy who’d totally blown it.
As he rounded the corner into the parking lot, he caught sight of a familiar figure leaning against the side of his truck. Just great. It was too late to turn around and go back the other way. His dad had already seen him. Hadn’t he made it clear last night that he didn’t have anything more to say to him?
When he was close enough to speak without having to raise his voice, Micah said, “Where’s Carly?”
His dad straightened, as if trying unsuccessfully to claim some height over his son. “She’s waiting back in her motel room.”
Micah felt his jaw tighten. “Why on earth did you bring her up here with you, anyway?”
“I thought she’d be able to persuade you if you wouldn’t listen to me. Besides, she was as worried about you as I was. She’s the one who read about you being in this little rodeo. If she hadn’t called me, I’d still be trying to find you.”
Micah’s gaze turned pointed. “Yeah, well did it ever occur to you that maybe I didn’t want you to find me?”
“Come on, son.” It was clear from his dad’s hard demeanor that he had heard Micah’s question but was choosing to ignore it. “Carly’s waiting for us to pick her up so we can get on the road.”
Weary from their exchange the night before, not to mention the ebbing adrenaline from the rodeo, Micah leaned an arm on th
e hood of his truck. “Dad, I told you last night. I’m not going back with you.”
His dad shook his head. “Oh come on, son. You’ve made your point. It’s time to come back to reality. People are counting on you. You still have a shot at the nationals, but you can’t afford to waste any more time.”
Micah shook his head. “It’s not a waste, Dad.”
A shadow went across his dad’s face, reminding Micah of the way he looked when he was up against an animal that was too strong-willed to be tamed. “So you’re willing to just throw away everything we worked for all these years?”
Anger painted a dismal coat of gray over Micah’s resolve. “Don’t you even want to know why I left?”
He gave a passive one-shoulder shrug. “You got scared. It happens. But it’s only going to get worse the more time you let pass. You leave with me tonight, you can be back in shape to compete in a few weeks.”
Micah’s chest squeezed. Why was his dad making this so difficult? He looked him square in the eye. “Do you even care about what I want?”
“You don’t know what you want. You’re not thinking straight.”
Heaving out a breath, Micah stepped forward to unlock his door. “I’m not arguing with you, Dad.”
“You know, you could have at least told me you were leaving.” His dad swept his hand down the length of the Dodge. “When I realized your truck was gone from the house, I assumed someone had stolen it. I went to that place where you were staying—”
“It was the rehabilitation center, Dad. You make it sound like I was at the Hilton.”
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