A Summer of New Beginnings

by Lisa Hobman

Gazing up into his eyes, she almost threw caution to the wind and dragged him into the fitting room with her. ‘Yes, Josh, I know that.’

  ‘Good. Now, later, you can do me a striptease with what you’ve bought.’

  This time her laugh bubbled up from her boots. ‘Oh, yes, I can imagine how that would look if Marco walked in again. Maybe we should go to your place next time.’

  Josh scrunched his nose. ‘Nah, your bedroom will work just fine.’ She knew his place was tiny from the minimal visits she’d made to the studio flat. His kitchen wasn’t really conducive to romantic meals and his neighbours were quite loud, but she wondered if he ever got fed up of coming to her place all the time. She’d need to ask him.

  ‘Okay, well, I think that’s everything you’re going to need. I’ll take the gear to the cash desk for you. And when you’re done there, I’ll give you a hand to get it all to the car.’

  ‘That’d be great. Thank you.’ With one of his signature sexy smiles Josh bent to pick up the pile of gear that had accumulated outside the fitting room and Zara slipped behind the door to get changed. As she clicked the bolt in place, she let out a long huff of air. Bloody hell, he really is gorgeous. How lucky am I?

  Once the gear was loaded into Zara’s car, she slammed the boot shut and turned her attention back on Josh.

  A little electricity crackled in the air between them and the urge to fling herself at him, lips first, bubbled towards the surface but she stomped on it before it had time to manifest. It was just a shame that she wouldn’t be seeing him later to let off some of the steam she’d accumulated at seeing him in his role of boss man. Who knew camping store managers could be so damned sexy?

  Once the car was loaded Zara slammed the boot shut. ‘Right, well, I’ll be off, then. When will I see you?’

  He glanced round to check that the coast was clear and slipped his arms round her. ‘Tomorrow night?’ He leaned down and whispered in her ear, ‘You could be waiting for me in your room wearing nothing but your walking boots.’

  In spite of the ridiculous suggestion, a shiver travelled her spine and everything south of her waistline throbbed. ‘Hmm… It could be arranged.’

  He squeezed her bottom and stepped away as a car pulled into the car park. ‘See you tomorrow, then, gorgeous.’

  She watched him retreat towards the shop once more and climbed in her car to head home. The fact that he had been so helpful and she’d loved seeing him in his element gave her more reasons to adore him and she smiled for the whole journey back to her flat.

  6

  Zara was relieved that Marco was there when she arrived home. It was nice not coming back to an empty flat. He was in his room surrounded by more boxes and she did wonder where the heck he was going to put everything. He had so much baggage and that was only taking into consideration the physical kind.

  Once the last box was unpacked and the bookshelves in his room were piled high with enough paperbacks to fill a shop, Marco flopped down on the couch beside her. He’d already thanked her with a couple of bottles of Prosecco that had been chilled and she’d taken the liberty of opening one.

  She handed him a glass and tucked her legs around her on the seat. ‘Cheers, roomy!’ she announced, clinking her glass into his.

  ‘Honestly, Zee, you have no idea how grateful I am for this. It’s going to be so much fun.’

  She nudged him. ‘So long as you don’t keep me awake with your snoring, we’ll be fine.’

  ‘Cheeky. I think you’ll find it’s you that sounds like a pig in your sleep.’ She feigned horror but then they both laughed. Marco glanced over at the pile of new purchases in the corner of the living room. ‘So, I see you’ve got your stuff for the camping trip, then. I bet that cost a pretty bloody penny.’

  Zara nodded as she swallowed the fizzy liquid. ‘It sure did. But the way I look at it is, Noah wants me to go, I don’t have the gear so he gets to pay. After all, the lot will be going online to be sold when I get back. I can guarantee this trip will put me off camping for life.’

  ‘You never know. You might find a new passion for the outdoors. Josh will be whisking you off to the middle of nowhere for romantic sojourns à la tent before you know it.’

  Zara grinned and tugged at a thread on the hem of her yoga pants. ‘Camping and romance are two diametrically opposed words, Marco. You of all people should know that. And even Josh can’t change my opinion on the matter. I’m not cut out for all that sleeping under the stars business. It’s just not me.’

  Marco gave one of his well-known eye rolls. ‘Why not? People change, honey. And this is the twenty-first century. Women can do whatever they want, you know.’

  ‘I know that. I just don’t see me ever getting to the stage where I look forward to something like camping.’

  ‘Well, I think you need to get tougher, missy. Josh would clearly love to take you on a trip that doesn’t involve a bed and breakfast.’

  She slapped his leg lightly. ‘Since when have you been in Josh’s corner?’

  ‘I’m in no one’s corner but yours, Zara Bear. But really… I mean, what do you two have in common apart from the mutual desire to rip each other’s clothes off?’

  She scowled at his harsh words although she knew there was a little truth to them too. ‘Haven’t you ever heard of opposites attracting?’

  ‘Obviously. I just… I don’t want you to get hurt that’s all.’

  She nudged him. ‘Good grief, is this the shape of things to come with our girlie chats? ’Cause if it is I think I’m going to kick you out.’

  ‘Consider the subject closed.’ He mimicked locking his mouth and throwing away an invisible key.

  *

  After feeling quite excited about a night in with Josh she had felt a little disappointed when he had texted to suggest a night out instead. He’d seemed a little strange the night before when she’d texted him. He wasn’t usually one for single-word responses but Saturday night had consisted of just that.

  Sunday went by in a blur and all too soon Zara stood in front of her full-length mirror scrutinising her appearance as Marco sat on her bed observing.

  ‘You look sexy AF, chica, so stop frowning, will you?’

  She huffed. ‘I get the feeling something isn’t right, though, Marco. I don’t know… He was great at the shop but then last night things just… changed. Maybe he’s going off me?’ She smoothed down the slate-grey, satin halter-neck top that she had slipped on with her black skinny jeans and high-heeled peep-toes. ‘We’re going to that new bar on Peckham High Street but I want to look sexy. Do I look like I’m trying too hard?’

  Marco snorted and collapsed back onto the pillows. ‘Oh, my God, just go and have fun, will you? He can barely keep his hands off you, so I think you’re overreacting. You’re gorgeous and a lovely person. He’s bloody lucky to have you. He may not be my favourite of your boyfriends but he is nice to look at. Although so was Harry…’

  Zara threw him a disgusted look. ‘Hey, I know Harry was your favourite. You don’t have to remind me. And it wasn’t my fault things didn’t work out with him. He just wasn’t my type in the end.’

  Marco sat up and laughed with incredulity. ‘Yeah, because handsome and rich are terrible qualities in a man. In fact, I hope to avoid them.’

  ‘Ahem, you forgot dull as ditch water. He could send me to sleep with his monotone voice, Marco. I want someone to make me laugh, not put me in a coma. And Josh has all the best qualities.’

  ‘Urgh, some people are so damned picky. I still can’t believe you didn’t even sleep with the man. Did you actually look at his body? I mean, come on, Zee, you could’ve bounced pennies off that bum.’

  Zara laughed out loud. ‘And that’s a quality we all should look for, is it?’

  ‘Damn bloody right it is.’ He grinned. ‘It’s the first thing I like to check.’

  She shook her head but couldn’t help giggling. ‘Incorrigible, Marco, that’s what you are.’ She turned back to the mirror. ‘Anyway, thi
s outfit, yes or no?’

  ‘Hells yes. Bloody go and wow him with your curves and remind him why he loves you.’ She paused at his words. The ‘L’ word hadn’t really been mentioned, even though she knew she felt it. She forced a laugh. ‘Yes… Yes, I’ll do just that.’

  He huffed. ‘You almost convinced me there, Zara Bear.’

  She shrugged. ‘Do you think he does love me?’

  His brow crumpled and he didn’t speak right away. ‘What’s not to love?’

  She turned to face him as her stomach knotted. ‘You didn’t exactly answer my question.’

  Marco climbed off the bed and walked towards her with what she felt was a very fake grin on his face. He placed a hand on each shoulder. ‘Zara, stop overthinking. I don’t know what’s got into you. What’s with all this insecurity? He adores you, it’s so obvious.’

  ‘Then why hasn’t he told me he loves me? It’s been a year.’

  He shook his head. ‘Take it from me, darling, men are arseholes. Most of them don’t know how to order a coffee, let alone express an emotion. Give him time. Or dump his arse. I’ll support you either way.’ He grinned.

  She slapped his arm playfully. ‘Hey!’ She was stopped from saying anything further as the doorbell rang. ‘Shit! It’s seven-thirty already?’

  ‘It would appear so. Want me to give him the big-brother talk?’

  Zara slapped his arm again. ‘You’ll do no such thing. Now go to your room, Marco Bianchi!’

  ‘You’re such a mean cow,’ he informed her with a smile as he left her room.

  Trying to push down her doubts, Zara took a deep breath and opened the door. Josh stood there looking absolutely gorgeous in a blue shirt and dark blue jeans. A wide, sexy smile spread across his face. ‘Wow. You look amazing.’

  She felt a flush of warmth rise from her chest to her cheeks. ‘Thanks. So do you.’

  He held out his arm for her to link hers with. ‘Come on, then, gorgeous, let’s go and paint old Peckham town crimson, shall we?’

  She shouted goodbye to Marco and hurriedly closed the door behind her before he could appear to make any inappropriate comments.

  *

  The evening was going well and Zara had relaxed greatly by her third drink. Josh seemed to be back to his normal self, making her laugh.

  He couldn’t seem to take his eyes off her, which was very reassuring. ‘I must say you look totally different in that outfit than the ones I had you wearing yesterday. Although, both looks are equally sexy.’

  She tucked her hair behind her ear, suddenly very self-aware. ‘I’d hardly call walking gear sexy, Josh, you weirdo.’

  ‘Oh, I don’t know. I think you’re the kind of woman who’d make a tea towel look sexy.’

  She almost choked on her drink. ‘Well, if I was just wearing a tea towel—’

  He leaned forward enthusiastically. ‘We could always get one and try it out,’ he said with that silly eyebrow wiggle.

  She laughed. She really had been worrying over nothing. ‘You have a way with words, that’s for sure.’

  He laughed heartily and grabbed his jacket, hastily placing it over his lap. ‘Ahem… yes… okay, as we’re in a public place let’s have a change of subject whilst I try to stop imagining the tea-towel scenario. Although I don’t really want to, if I’m honest. Okay, shut up, Josh!’ He took a deep breath and Zara tried to stop the fit of giggles that threatened to erupt, even though it felt good to laugh.

  Finally he seemed calm again. ‘So, are you getting excited about your trip yet? How long is it now?’ he asked with a knowing grin.

  She scrunched her nose. ‘I don’t think I’ll ever be ready. It’s around three weeks until I go, which is three weeks too soon.’

  He cringed and hissed in through his teeth. ‘You’re still not happy about it, then?’

  ‘Absolutely not. It’s just not my thing at all. I’m not made for the great outdoors. I’m made for the luxury indoors,’ she replied with a giggle.

  He shook his head. ‘You see, I don’t get that. I can’t get enough of the fresh air and open spaces. That’s why I studied Marine Biology at uni. I absolutely adore all things to do with the outdoors. Give me a rock face to climb, an ocean to dive or a vast area to trek and I’m in my element. I don’t need the luxuries of million-thread-count sheets or fluffy pillows.’

  Zara felt a little indignant. ‘I don’t need those things either. I just prefer them.’

  Josh leaned forward with a determined look in his eyes. ‘I know. But… what about nature? What about breathing clean air and seeing the most wonderful scenery when you wake up on a morning?’

  ‘I like to see a white sandy beach with a lounger on it when I wake up on a morning. That’s scenery to me,’ she informed him bluntly.

  He sighed, clearly becoming frustrated. ‘Good grief, Zara, where’s your sense of adventure? Don’t you want to see more than just the designer fittings of a five-star hotel?’

  ‘Look, Josh, I think we ascertained long ago that we have different ideals when it comes to holidays. Can’t we just leave it at that? I travel all over the world for my job. I do see places. I go on tours. I don’t just sit by the pool, you know.’ Why was she explaining herself?

  ‘But you go on the touristy tours. You don’t get out there to see the real people, the real places.’

  Her nostrils flared and she spoke through gritted teeth. ‘No, because many of the places I go to aren’t safe for people to just go roaming off willy-nilly, that’s why. I like to stay alive. I like to know I’m not going to get kidnapped or robbed.’

  ‘But in that case you’re not really living, are you?’ As soon as the words fell from his lips he closed his eyes briefly, as if realising he’d overstepped the line.

  Zara came to the conclusion that the night had been a mistake after all. ‘Look, it’s getting late; I think I’d better be going home. Thank you for a lovely evening, Josh.’

  She stood to leave the table and he stood too. He held out his arm towards her but didn’t make contact. ‘Hey, gorgeous, I’m sorry, please don’t go. I hate fighting with you. I promise I’ll shut up now.’

  She had been aware for a while that he had the ability to open his mouth and jam his foot straight in there and she had once found it quite sweet; disarming even. But now, especially with his strange behaviour, her patience was wearing thin.

  She forced a smile. ‘I really am tired.’

  His shoulders slumped and he nodded in defeat. ‘Well, at least let me walk you home, then.’ She shrugged and turned to leave with Josh following close behind as they left the bar.

  They walked in silence for a while and Zara’s mind whirred with possible things to say to ease the tension that had built between them. She didn’t want to lose him, but their differences were becoming scarily unavoidable and the last thing she wanted was to invest more of her life in a relationship that was ultimately going nowhere. There were opposites attracting and then there was just completely opposite. Maybe they were too different. Maybe Marco had been right when he said their relationship revolved around sex. Well, he hadn’t exactly said it but she knew for a fact he thought it.

  Eventually Josh grabbed her hand and tugged her to a standstill. ‘Hey, I know I’ve been an arse. I don’t know what came over me. The only excuse is that I’ve got a lot on my mind right now. You know I’m quite a fun bloke really. And I’m not in the least bit judgemental. But I’ve definitely come across that way tonight, which pisses me off. To be honest… I’m not sleeping and I talk utter shit when I’m tired. And it makes me a bit rambly. Like I can’t stop myself. But I genuinely didn’t mean to go all ape-shit on you about your likes and dislikes. I was way too… gung-ho back there. No wonder I’ve pissed you off.’

  The genuine disappointment in his eyes tugged at her heart. ‘You’re not sleeping? What’s going on, Josh? Is it anything I’ve done?’

  He laughed. ‘Not at all. It’s just… work stuff… Nothing you can help with. It’ll all be fin
e, I promise. I just… I wish I could be more like you, you know? You have this air of confidence about you. Like with this camping thing. You know it’s your job and you’re taking it on the chin even though you really don’t want to. You haven’t point-blank refused. You’re strong. So much stronger than I am, that’s for sure. You know what you like and you stick to your guns. I guess you’re a very strong, independent woman. I don’t have courage like that. So I guess I’m… I’m a little envious.’ The sadness returned.

  Zara gazed up with incredulity into the handsome face before her and her heart melted a little. Maybe Marco was right. Maybe he was just struggling to share his emotions. Obviously something was happening at work to make him doubt himself. And it was true that people usually took out their frustrations on those closest to them. Then there was the whole thing about him studying Marine Biology at uni. This was new information to her. She wondered why he was working in a camping shop when he was clearly qualified for something completely different.

  She sighed. ‘You have nothing to be envious of, Josh. I’m scared to death of making this trip. Any confidence you see in me is all bravado, I can assure you. But… I worry about us. That we’re two very different people and I’m not sure how it will work going forward.’ But I want it to. I really want it to.

  He reached out and gently stroked her cheek with his thumb, sending a flush of heat where he had touched. ‘It’s been a year, though, Zara. We’ve been great so far, haven’t we? And they do say opposites attract, don’t they? And you know I’m very, very attracted to you.’ His voice had softened to a whisper and her brain was screaming: They do say that, he’s right. They do! ‘So what do you say? Are you willing to put this evening behind us? Just put it down to silly male pride and insecurity? I promise I’ll do better next time.’ He tilted the corner of his mouth into a half-smile and that was it. She was done for.

  Without giving her a chance to respond, he lowered his face until his lips brushed hers and her eyes fluttered closed. She took delight in the familiar feeling of his soft mouth against hers and realised it didn’t matter how different they were on the surface, deep down this was love and she knew it for a fact.