Enough Isn't Everything (Everything Trilogy)
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Enough Isn’t Everything
K. L. Shandwick
Published in 2013 by K.L.Shandwick
Copyright © The author as named on the book cover.
Cover Design : Russell Cleary
All Rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, copied, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted, in any form or by any means, without the prior written consent of the copyright holder, nor be otherwise circulated in any form of binding or cover other than that in which it is published and without a similar condition being imposed on the subsequent purchaser.
Disclaimer: This ebook has explicit reference to sexual situations and is intended for adult readers aged 18+.
This ebook is a work of fiction, Names, places, characters, band names and incidents are the product of the author’s imagination or names are used within the fictitious setting. Any resemblance to actual person’s living or dead. Band names or locales are entirely coincidental.
Everything Trilogy
Reading Order
1. Enough Isn’t Everything
2. Everything She Needs
3. Everything I Want
Contents
CHAPTER 1: NEW LIFE
CHAPTER 2: FIRST IMPRESSIONS
CHAPTER 3: SEXUAL TENSION
CHAPTER 4: FIFTY-FIFTY
CHAPTER 5: STRETCHING LIMITS
CHAPTER 6: HEAVY METAL
CHAPTER 7: SECOND HELPINGS
CHAPTER 8: BREAKFAST
CHAPTER 9: NIGHT OUT
CHAPTER 10: I’M STALKING YOU
CHAPTER 11: SPOONING
CHAPTER 12: WHAT GOES AROUND
CHAPTER 13: PLAYING GAMES
CHAPTER 14: DESSERT
CHAPTER 15: MY TWO MEN
CHAPTER 16: PARTNERSHIPS
CHAPTER 17: COMPLICATIONS
CHAPTER 18: OLD FLAMES
CHAPTER 19: SUNRISE
CHAPTER 20: SNEAKY
CHAPTER 21: SEX, LIES, AND DISCLOSURES
CHAPTER 22: BEING A FRIEND
CHAPTER 23: I’VE GOT TO BE ME
CHAPTER 24: MISCONCEPTIONS
CHAPTER 25: MIND GAMES
CHAPTER 26: THIS HAS TO STOP
CHAPTER 27: FRIENDS
CHAPTER 28: PUTTING IT OUT THERE
CHAPTER 29: SAFE
CHAPTER 30: GREAT ACTING
CHAPTER 31: PLAYING WITH ME
CHAPTER 32: GETTING STRONGER
CHAPTER 33: IT IS WHAT IT IS
CHAPTER 34: WILL’S CURIOSITY
CHAPTER 35: MOMENT OF WEAKNESS
CHAPTER 36: BEAUTIFUL GOODBYES
CHAPTER 37: DISTANT VERSES DISTANCE
DEDICATION
CHAPTER 1: NEW LIFE
Nerves twisted my stomach in knots, and my mouth was completely dry. I was having an adrenaline rush, whilst punching in the number I had rang hundreds of times before, but never with as much excitement as I felt right now. My body had let me down and began to perspire. The searing heat from the sun contributed to that too; it was damned hot here.
I held my breath as I tried to control my racing heartbeat, so that I could concentrate on listening to my call. I heard a click, and the unfamiliar tone that let me know I was connected to the cell number I had just dialed.
The ringing tone wasn’t what I normally expected to hear, because everything is different here. Even although we speak the same language, there are subtle differences. One of these differences is the connecting ringing tone, which sounds different here in the United States than the one in the UK.
“Woo hoo! Lily,you’re here!” Saffy and Holly were yelling and hollering down the line at me, I could hear the noisy roar of the traffic around them, and I deduced that they had the soft top down. I had finally landed in Miami, and my roommates were only three hours away from joining me. When they arrived, we’d finally be able to start the next chapter of our lives without the Atlantic between us.
“I can’t wait for you to get here. It feels amazing to be at South Beach.” Holly whooped a bit more, and Saffy called out, “Get some sleep, you’re going to need it.We’re going out tonight.” She started to say something else, but instead began shouting profanities to another car driver that almost drove into her. We concluded the call so that they could concentrate on getting here in one piece.
I turned to face the Atlantic Ocean on the beachfront. I glanced up at the cloudless blue blanket of sky and couldn’t help but notice how stark the contrast was to the dark gray, rainy sky I’d left behind in London yesterday. As I hit the end button on my cell, I hugged it to my chest. I leaned my elbows on the barrier of the boardwalk and stared straight ahead.
My eyes panned over the uninterrupted view of the ocean and soft, white sand. I became aware I was bouncing on my toes with nervous energy. I put my heels and soles down to still my restless legs.
Obviously, I wasn’t acclimatized yet, and my t-shirt had started sticking to the hollow of my back. Moist sweat erupted in beads down my back with the humid air around me.
I pulled the hem of my t-shirt free from my jeans. I began to waft it trying to catch some air underneath, but it did nothing to cool me down. Actually, I think it made me even hotter.
It was still early in the morning, but there was a swimmer out there in the ocean already. I pushed my oversized brown Gucci shades further up my nose, and scooped back my long, carefully straightened, dark brown hair which had now kinked and stuck to the back of my neck. I twirled my hair up, and tucked it under my wide sun hat to help me keep cool.
I glanced over my glasses to test their effectiveness against the sun’s rays and almost blinded myself. The glare from the sun caught the ripples on the water, making me close my eyes and wince. The white light was still visible behind my eyelids when I closed them, so I concluded that my shades were pretty effective.
Turning, I tilted my head backwards holding my sun hat in place. I surveyed the building that was going to be my home. A wide smile played on my lips. I pushed the door open, and a waft of cool air hit me as I headed for the large cherrywood reception desk across from the entrance.
A middle aged, well-groomed, official looking man in a grey uniform looked up at me and smiled. “Hello, Miss Parnell. Good journey?” Tom, the doorman, greeted me, and I was flattered that he had remembered me from four months ago, when my friends and I came to view the apartment we were renting together.
He was very patient and took his time explaining everything I needed to learn to access the services the landlord offered. I smiled genuinely and thanked him as I headed for the elevator. The ride up to our apartment only increased the butterflies in my stomach as the anticipation of finally beginning the next chapter of my life’s journey got underway.
I drove in my little rental car from the airport through Miami, and my nerves were in tatters by the time I crawled off the highway as the satellite navigation brought me to my new home. I felt quite impressed with myself for having the guts to do the journey under my own steam, rather than grab a cab.
I made myself a promise that from the moment I left home, I was not going to cut corners and revert to the ‘tourist’ that I had been previously on visits here. This time was different. I was going to be living here.
The planning to get to this day had been done with military precision. My parents freaked out when I chose my University. I picked Miami because my friend Saffy studied here and maybe because the American music scene in Miami seemed a little more laid-back than London. Although, no less talented.
I wasn’t interested in becoming famous or living the highlife. My parents have money, and I’m wealthy in my own right, from a large inheritance left b
y my grandparents. I just wanted to learn my craft and meet some like-minded people with no pretenses or pressure to do things with music that conformed to whatever happened to be the trend at the time. Above all I wanted to learn about myself and become a more confident and self-assured person.
Eventually, I had managed to wear my parents down by making some decisions that they were even more scared about. I challenged their middle-class values by travelling to the Punjab to work in a children’s orphanage for the summer.
My mother had been beside herself with stories of how basic the facilities were. As if this would be the most testing aspect of working with parentless children in a third world country.
Before I went to India my mother had arranged all kinds of immunisations with our physician and had him provide me with a medical kit that included needles, antibiotics, and an assortment of sterile bandages and dressings. She also had leaflets, tons of them, containing information on every disease she could think of. My mother didn’t trust the internet to inform me about things.
Although I was here to study, I also hoped to wipe out the memory of my one disastrous night with my BFF Elle’s brother Sam; that happened after a stupid lapse in judgement on my part.
I felt myself blushing, when I remembered how awkward it had been. I blush a lot actually, one of my many flaws. Poor Sam had always crushed on me, but never acted on it until the night of my leaving party. Alcohol was to blame; tequila shooters to be precise.
I don’t particularly like alcohol, but everyone around me was in drunken-student- party-mode and were wearing ‘Beer Goggles’ by the end of the night. These usually made even the most attractively challenged people easier on the eye.
The shooters started out with the usual salt, tequila, and lime, but by the end of the night had advanced to a weird and sadistic variation. It went something like snorting the salt and squeezing the lime juice in their eyes or something. I had just come back from the bathroom, so wasn’t exactly involved in that form of self harm, thankfully.
Everything after that was a bit hazy. We danced a lot that night too. We all did this crazy group dance, jumping together like it was a really cool thing to do; when in reality, we must have looked pretty stupid.
In truth, we were probably just doing this because it seemed the most effective when we were drunk. It reduced any need to try to coordinate ourselves.
That evening worsened further when my best friend Elle, who was especially drunk and emotional, tried to give a speech. She looked dreadful with tears streaming, her nose all red, and her face blotchy. She dabbed the mascara around her eyes with a tissue, which really did nothing, as there were black lines all the way down to her chin, some of which had dried from before.
As the club closed and my friends began to dwindle, there were more tears, hugs, and kisses between us. We all promised to keep in touch with one another. Even as I was saying this, I knew I would be saying goodbye to most of them forever. I wrung at my cuff sleeve, twisting it and remember thinking it was a bit symbolic to me. It was like I was wringing out my heart to make way for the new people I’d meet and who would eventually make their way into it.
I thought about how sad I’d felt about Jack, my closest friend, not being there that night. People found it strange that we were so tight, Maybe because he was a man. He worked as a music reporter and was on assignment covering a band, a gig launch in Paris, so he didn’t make it back before I left.
Jack and I had seen each other through every chapter of our lives so far. We had been friends since we were four-year-old kids. He was the brother, and the boyfriend, I never had.
It was a weird relationship to the outsiders looking in. We knew everything about each other, and he was the only person in the world that I had no inhibitions with. He was like a second skin and brought out my daring side and warped sense of humor.
Jack was such a liberating influence on me, and we pushed the boundaries of flirting. It was harmless fun to us, but confused the hell out of others as to what we were to each other. Jack always told people that think we have a weird relationship that they are just jealous because they could never have what we have.
By the time we arrived at Elle’s place, there were eight of us left. These people had helped shape me, not that I was much… yet! I was hoping four years in Florida would change me for the better. David never knew when to stop partying, and shouted, “Spin the Bottle,” and I groaned. The prospect of doing something embarrassing filled me with dread.
Maddie was the first victim of the bottle and refused the dare, which was to pick a guy and demonstrate to us what was meant by ‘dry humping’. She looked mortified. Her punishment was to drink a murky looking mixture of alcohols that Elle had ‘found’ in her kitchen cupboard.
No one even wondered how long it had been there. Maddie heaved and then wretched, but managed to keep it down, while we all cheered at her grimacing face. I rubbed her back even as I doubled over, giggling, when I saw the state she got into. I knew she would have accepted the dare if her on-off boyfriend hadn’t left already.
Sam was dared to pick a female to demonstrate a sensual massage on, but whilst the girl was fully clothed. He picked me. I still blush now, when I think about how nervous both he and I were at our public display, even though it didn’t count, because he didn’t actually touch my flesh in front of all those voyeurs.
At twenty-one, I was a deliberately slow starter in the carnal knowledge arena. Hell, I was a late starter period. I was starting college almost three years after my peers. I had only ever been to second base with a guy, having never found anyone attractive enough for me to think of actually “doing it” with, until very recently.
Eventually the game stopped, and I sat on the floor contented, albeit a little tipsy. Things were a little hazy, and my eyes drooped closed. A voice interrupted my thoughts and I heard a whispering,” I so want to do that to you for real.”
I murmured, “Hmm… huh?”
There was more ragged breathed in my ear while Sam said, “The massage, slow and sensual, my hands rubbing all over you.”
My eyes snapped open. Okay, I was a little drunk, but suddenly a lot curious to know what that would feel like.” Yeah?” His breathing was ragged, and he nodded eagerly at me. His pale blue eyes twinkled as they glazed with desire; at least that’s what I think it was.
I liked Sam. Hell, he’d been my best friend’s brother since he was born…it had tickled my drunken mind that I’d thought that, and I had laughed out loud at the time.
He looked as if he had been mortally wounded when I laughed. I apologized profusely, and told him that what I had been thinking had nothing to do with his proposition. He leaned in and said, “Lily, don’t fuck with my feelings. What I just said took a lot of guts on my part.” Aww.
I had found myself cupping his face in my hands in drunken- affectionate reassurance.
“Hey, no… I’m flattered.” Damn, I was drunk. Then I leaned in and sloppily kissed his nose. He grabbed my jaw, turned my face, and landed a soft, slow kiss on my lips.
It was a gentle, tender kiss. His eyes took on a pleading look and as he stood and pulled me up. He led me stumbling over the drunken bodies on the floor and out of the sitting room.
Sam took me into Elle’s guest bedroom, where he was currently staying. Sam faced me, closing the door quietly with his arms behind him. As the door clicked closed this was where his tenderness ended, the massage forgotten, and his drunken teenage testosterone surge took over.
Let’s just say sex was not what I was lead to believe, and I was left thinking that there had to be more to it than that. I mean, if people kept on doing it repeatedly.
I still smirked now when I thought of the private message he sent me on Facebook, telling me “how great our first time was together,” and that he hoped to repeat it again with me some day. My thoughts were that Sam’s experience with me would be his first, and his last.
I inhaled deeply, as my thoughts turned to getting insi
de my apartment for the first time. My fingers shook slightly as the key found the lock, and the pleasure I felt inside fizzed through me. I heard the lock click and swung the heavy wooden apartment door open. My eyes scanned around the sitting room, taking in the sight.
The family room was huge and bright, with large stretched windows on one side, and a huge balcony patio window at the front. The hardwood floors gave a warm, rich appearance to the room in the sunlight. I walked in the direction of the balcony, passing the massive cream leather sofas and deep pile rug, which set the room off perfectly.
The balcony was much bigger than I remembered and wrapped around the condo on two sides as we were on the corner, giving us a view to the west and south. Looking out on the balcony, I could see the quality extended out there as well, with an intimate patio breakfast table and two chairs.
There was a more formal seating area, again with big cream rattan chairs, covered with deep plum cushions and a fantastic rounded daybed. I looked out at the undisturbed view of the ocean, and realised what a great location this was and how lucky I was to be here.
Although, I was fortunate to have lived and grown up in one of the most exclusive areas of London, everything here was a world away from what I was used to at home; in terms of having access to sea, sunshine, and sand. When I left yesterday the weather was cold, wet, and windy.
Here, I had bright sunshine on tap and just having that made me feel much more optimistic about everything in general. I wandered through to my bedroom. The girls had already allocated the master suite to me because of my distance from home.
I kicked off my shoes and decided to use the time I had until my roommates arrived by having a leisurely shower and grabbing a nap. I was confident of my choice of roommates because I already knew them well.
Besides, I wouldn’t have made the choice of college I had if I had to share a dorm with eighteen-year-olds fresh out of high school. Apart from my music I came here to spend time with my friend, Saffy.