Enough Isn't Everything (Everything Trilogy)

by Shandwick, K. L.

  “Hey,” Alfie cooed. “Lily honey, how’re you doing?” Alfie leaned in and placed a small kiss on my cheek. His touch was electric. Max’s arms tightened their grip again as I struggled to control my breathing and sound calm.

  “Hi Alfie,” I said as calmly as I could, but swallowed hard.

  He wasn’t perturbed at all by the fact I was in Max’s arms. He leaned in and brushed my hair away from my face, and I almost screamed out loud, because I knew my body would react. Alfie’s touch buzzed through me, and pooled at my core.

  I had fought my body’s natural instinct to stiffen when his lips touched my cheek. I didn’t want it to betray me while I was in Max’s arms. “Alfie’s studying music as well, he’s partly the reason Will and I perform together,” I explained to Max.

  I closed my eyes and swallowed for a brief second, and as they opened Alfie’s eyes penetrated mine again. I searched Alfie’s face, wanting to know why he would do this. I felt Max’s arms relax a little. He hadn’t noticed any reaction, and I was relieved.

  “Is everyone in England this rude?” Alfie asked, deadpan. “I’m Alfie, a good… buddy of Lily’s,” he said unsmilingly but putting a hand out to Max. “And you are?” His eyes flicked between Max and I.

  “Max,” he said, curtly. “I’m a very close friend of Lily’s,” Max declared it like he was staking a bigger claim to me.

  Max reached out to shake Alfie’s extended hand, but held me in place with his other arm. The tension between the two men made me feel uneasy. Fortunately, at that moment, it was our turn at the checkout. I was relieved to focus on something other than this awkward situation.

  I moved toward the checkout, and Max relaxed his grip on me, letting me place the shopping on the belt. I was praying that Alfie would just leave, scared that he may say something to humiliate me. Instead of leaving he became more vocal.

  “I’m glad I ran into you actually, there’s an event that I wanted to talk to you about. I wanted to know if you’d be interested in performing a couple of numbers with my band next month.” My jaw dropped, and he gave me his seductively sexy-dimple smile.

  His focus was completely on me now. Max was forgotten in the exchange between us. Alfie was looking genuinely at me, and damn he was so fucking irresistible. “Some of our other friends are coming over for drinks tonight. Do you guys want to come, and we’ll talk about it then?”

  I was still stuck on his use of the term our friends when Max looked at me before mumbling, “Sorry buddy, thanks for the offer, but we’re going to have a more intimate party of our own tonight.”

  Firstly, I was annoyed with Max almost staking a claim to me in front of Alfie in that way. Secondly, I was also confused to see a fleeting look of anger and something – I couldn’t place – in Alfie’s eyes. I saw his jaw twitch, so I knew what Max had said had gotten to him.

  Max seemed to have missed this as he had turned to pick up the bags. Alfie reached out and his fingers brushed up my thigh, stealing my breath briefly. He grinned wickedly, his eyes widening, as he ran his tongue over his bottom lip and bit it slowly, his eyes now raking over my body.

  It was like the look he had when he was undressing me. Excitement coursed through my body at seeing him act this way, and I struggled to keep my breath even. He could feel my heat, and I blushed. Alfie’s face was instantly passive as Max turned around to face us again.

  I fought hard with the feelings that were coursing through my veins, and my thigh tingled and burned from where his fingers had traced moments before.

  My panties were moist, and I ached for him to touch me again. My thinking voice was screaming for him, but my face was a blank canvas. No way could I show him that I still wanted him. Besides, it was crazy, I was here with Max.

  Max took the bags in one arm and pulled me close to him with the other. “Okay, honey, we’re done, we got to get going.” He excused us and led me toward the exit. I couldn’t help thinking that Max kissing the top of my head, then nuzzling my neck on the way out was his way of marking his territory a little for Alfie’s benefit.

  He didn’t follow us, rooted to the spot as he continued to watch us make our way out. We packed our shopping in the trunk, and I looked up as we were getting into the car.

  Alfie was now leaning against his car door parked in the opposite row to ours, his gaze fixed on me. I noticed his fists were clenched as I got into the car.

  Max stared him out and looked pissed when he got into the car, banging the door. His weight made the car seat huff as he landed heavily on it. His head whipped around to face me. “You need to watch that guy, babe.” He looked cross.

  I said nothing. “Christ!” He spat out, “Does he always look at you like that?”

  I pretended not to know what he meant. “Like what? I don’t know what you mean?” I lied.

  Max growled, his voice cracking, “Like he wants to fuck you hard Lily, like that look!”

  I shook my head. “That’s garbage!” I said trying to sound casual about him.

  “Seriously, you don’t see that, Lily?” Max’s voice was so low with emotion he was almost growling at me. It was strange watching his reaction, and I tried to make light of it.

  “He’s just an intense guy,” I quipped trying to laugh it off.

  Max became really pissed at my reaction. “It’s not fucking funny Lily. You are going to have to tread carefully around that guy. He’ll fuck you senseless if you look at him the wrong way.” He shifted in his seat and hit over at the wheel. “Damn!”

  Max’s words put me off balance. Alfie was only after sex, as I had been. The thing that was different about this was that he had engaged with me outside of the bedroom, and Max had seen his lust.

  I thought Alfie’s reaction was due to not taking rejection well. I imagined his looks, bad-boy image, and charm made him irresistible to most women, and I had just dented that image. Watching Max’s reaction, though, helped me understand why Alfie had ignored me in public.

  I wondered if his reaction was just that he’d recognized Alfie’s behavior because he was thinking the same thing about me. They both wanted to have sex with me.

  I leaned toward his side of the car, taking Max’s face in my hands. “Don’t worry about me Max, I’m a big girl, and right now, I want to spend time with you. Please let’s not argue about anything, least of all Alfie, he doesn’t figure. The guy barely knows me. Let it go Max, especially today.”

  Max came closer and kissed me softly, before cupping his hand behind my head, pulling me in to deepen the kiss. I smiled at him when we broke free, but I hated knowing that Alfie was watching while Max had been kissing me.

  I tried to shrug off Alfie’s stare when I looked out as I started the engine. It made me feel sick to do this in front of him.

  As I drove past him, Max’s blood boiled again. “He so wants to fuck you, though. Look at the way he’s watching you,” he threw out there. I looked over at Alfie trying to figure out what his game was, and why he was doing this.

  Max turned to face me. “Are you truly not aware how that man feels about you, Lily?” I was stunned by the intensity of Max’s reaction to Alfie.

  “Max, all the guys I’ve met that have wanted me, have only wanted my body.”

  My mother used to tell me that she saw beauty as a curse sometimes. I often wondered what she meant by that, but I think I was beginning to better understand her now. I couldn’t help how I looked, but I could help how I felt. “Trust me, Max, Alfie isn’t interested in me.”

  We sat in silence during the drive back. I think that I gave him something to think about with my self-righteous speech about men. I also noticed that Max never contradicted me on my point about men in relation to himself either.

  As we neared the condo, Max reached over and took my hand, sprinkling small kisses over my knuckles. His hand then slid along the back of my seat and into my hair. He massaged circles into my neck as I drove.

  I peered at him over my sunglasses. “Is this the female equival
ent of a blow job at the wheel?” I teased trying to divert his thoughts. Max threw his head back with a loud chuckle, and his mood was instantly calmer.

  Saffy was up and about when we burst through the door, weighed down from our shopping trip. “Where have you been? I’ve asked Will over and thought we could all go out on a boat this afternoon.”

  Coming from the Midwest, Max and Saffy didn’t get much of a chance to see the ocean. Neither did I, come to think of it, until I arrived here. Max disappeared into Saffy’s room, and I went to change for the trip.

  I pulled on a red bikini and black shorts and packed some soda and water in a cooler for us. As we headed downstairs to meet Will, Saffy linked arms with me. “Thank you so much for taking care of Max last night, honey. I owe you,” she said quietly to me.

  Max heard her and snickered. “Yeah, it must have been a real chore for her.” He gave me a sly smile, and I blushed crimson.

  Saffy caught it. “What was that look?” She pointed between Max and me, and he threw his hands open.

  “What…what look?”

  “The look you just gave her, like some secret smile or something. You’re sick Max.”

  Max chewed the inside of his mouth, trying to keep in straight line. “Saffy, I’ve come a long way to see you!” He snorted. “You skipped out on me, leaving poor Lily to keep me company.”

  I looked at my feet, and pinched the underside of my thigh where my hands were, to stop myself laughing at the guilt trip he was putting on his sister.

  Max was relentless. “Then, when I was honest with you this morning, you freaked out, calling me a liar, and now this? Makes me wonder why I bothered to come. My trip would have been awful, except little Lily took me under her wing.”

  “See!” Saffy spat at him, “You just contradicted yourself!”

  Max looked confused. “I did?”

  She nodded, pointing at me. “Yup, one minute you were off getting laid, and the next, Lily was keeping you company.”

  Max’s eyes were pleading with me, and I wanted to support him, so I gave him a slow nod and blushed. I scrunched my eyes up and pulled my shoulders to my ears as I waited for the onslaught when Saffy found out.

  He chuckled at me. Will rubbed the back of his neck and looked almost as awkward as I felt, as Max turned to Saffy. “Listen to me Saffy, I’m only going to say this once, so you need to listen carefully. I did get laid last night, fact.”

  He struggled to keep himself from laughing. “Lily did keep me company. The two events don’t have to be mutually exclusive you know.” My heart stuttered as I waited for the onslaught of Saffy’s response when it sunk in.

  I swallowed hard, my heart pounding in my chest. Saffy’s head snapped round and she stared at me silently for what seemed like a really long time. Her facial expressions changing from disbelief, shock, horror, disgust, then settled on anger.

  Will shuffled his feet, his eyes flicking between us, and he looked like he wished he was anywhere else, except here. He seemed thoroughly embarrassed, his eyes darting between Saffy and me several times. I could see him cringe like he was hearing something he’d never recover from.

  He was also staring at me as if he couldn’t believe I’d have intercourse with anyone. Of everything that was going on, his face was the one thing I found the most amusing during this whole obtuse situation.

  Saffy stood digesting Max’s disclosure. I was blushing, mortified that anyone was discussing me having sex. Her head swung round to Max. “Max Barclay. You fucking man whore. You fucked my friend, you piece of shit? You fucked my best fucking friend?” Her head snapped back in my direction.

  “Lily? Lily! You let my brother fuck you?” She pulled her hands up and gripped her hair.

  I knew she’d be disappointed with me, but I never dreamed she’d react this badly. I thought she was going to hit me she was so crazy.

  I cleared my throat, but thought better of speaking, so I stood with my arm across my body holding my other forearm.

  Will, who seemed to have recovered from the shock that I’d actually let a man do things to me, looked bemused and kind of smirked at me.

  At one point I thought he was going to laugh, but he started stroking down both cheeks to his chin with his thumb and forefinger to hide this. Will’s eyes were darting between all of us now, taking in everyone’s reaction. I was betting that he would think of this as payback for what I did to him yesterday on the way home in the car.

  CHAPTER 22: BEING A FRIEND

  Max pleaded, “Come on Saffy, Lily and I are consenting adults. I mean it’s not as if I tied her down or anything, although…”He smirked, then continued, “anyway, I don’t think I took advantage of her, do you think I did, Lily?”

  I found my voice and said, “Not at all. I am more than happy with what happened.”

  Will’s, “I bet,” fell out before he was conscious of it; his thinking voice falling out of his mouth.

  Saffy turned and batted him on the chest, then snapped at him. “Shut the fuck up, Will.” Will shuffled his feet, biting his lip, and it was my turn to smirk.

  Will cleared his throat, and seemed to want us to see him sticking up for himself after she chastised him. “I think you just need to calm down Saffy, it’s not like it’s the end of the world or anything.”

  She snapped her head back in his direction now, giving him a scowling look, but Willbecame braver. “The thing is, honey, I think you’ve got no right to get on your high horse, we were at it all night. What’s good for the goose …” Max growled at Will, who had just admitted having sex with his sister.

  I giggled at Will’s attempt to make it better, but instead, made it worse by putting himself further in the firing line. It was becoming so ridiculous. What we had all had done was a natural adult activity by consenting adults. The way Saffy was behaving was like someone had committed a major crime.

  I held my hands up. I couldn’t keep my face straight it was so absurd. “Will you all stop this?” I giggled, and tried to compose myself. I turned this back on Saffy. “If you hadn’t gone with Will, would Max and I have happened last night? Highly unlikely, I think.”

  I rolled my eyes and glanced at Max’s smirking face. “Do I think we would have had sex some other time? I think so if the circumstances arose. Max and I have always had a kind of ‘thing’ about each other. We’re just old enough to see where it takes us now. We enjoyed spending time with each other and know that if it doesn’t go anywhere, we’ll still love each other because of our history.”

  Max rubbed Saffy’s back and pulled her in for a bear hug, kissing her forehead. “You’ll get used to it Saffy. We won’t be in your face with this, but we don’t want to stop.” Saffy struggled to hold her gaze to me.

  “Please Saffy, be okay about it.” She sighed.

  “I don’t ever want to lose you because of a bad relationship with my brother, and I don’t want you not to have a relationship with Max if it makes you both happy either.” She sniffed.

  “Saffy, we are very cool with what happened, we’re just going to see where it takes us. Nothing’s changed.” I hugged her affectionately.

  Max said, “True Lily, nothing has changed, except we had some incredible orgasms.”

  I threw Max a you’re-dead-when-I-get you-on-your-own glare, and Saffy slapped Max hard on the arm. “That’s way too much information Max! TMI.”

  Will raised an eyebrow at me, and I couldn’t help but think that someday this conversation would be used to get his own back for the prank I pulled on him about his sex life. He winked and grinned at me.

  “What’s the female version of a stud?” he asked, teasing me before chuckling again. I had been doing really well, but now that the focus was more about the sex, I blushed again.

  Max and I continued to have a great time together in the following few days. When Sunday arrived, it came too quickly for the both of us. We lay tangled in each other, him holding me tightly, stroking my arm, after a tender lovemaking session.

&
nbsp; We had stayed awake all night talking, not wanting to waste time sleeping when we could share it with each other, enjoying the darkness, and watching the daylight creep in.

  I drove him to the airport, and we stood holding each other and staring ahead at the security desk that would take him airside. My stomach sank when his flight was called.

  We had a torturous parting, with Max coming back to kiss me deeply twice, pained about leaving me, while I was trying to be strong and not cry.

  I stood biting my lip, until Max told me to stop or he’d drag me to a bathroom for another farewell session. I looked up at him, with tears welling in my eyes, and went up on tiptoe to peck his cheek.

  He kissed my nose one last time, and I watched him looking back at me. He looked as torn as I felt. He cleared security and disappeared out of sight. I sighed and a single tear ran down my face. My heart squeezed when I could no longer see him.

  Driving back, the radio was full of music that did nothing to lighten my mood. It was dark by the time I arrived home, and the apartment was empty.

  I was thankful for that at least, I didn’t feel like talking and went for a hot bath, filling the tub with bubbles. The smell of the bath oil was intoxicating but it didn’t make me feel any better.

  Saffy was staying with Will again, and Holly was working. I hadn’t seen her in days. I crawled into bed and tried to do some homework for college, but my mind was still with Max. My cell buzzed in my purse, and I leaned out of bed to reach for it, almost toppling out of it.

  Max: Lying here, remembering your sweet face.

  Lily me too, not that your face is sweet…it’s handsome.

  Max: You like what you see, huh?

  Lily : Nah, honestly…you’re a troll.

  Max: LMAO My time with you was wonderful, Lily, thank you.

  Lily : I had a great time…it sucks we didn’t have more of it.