He began to laugh. “You are going to tell me you would rather be with that fool?” He pointed over to Dale, who was admiring a vase, concentrating on it as if scientifically.
I shook my head. “I would rather be with someone who was honest like Dale than with someone who cannot keep track of his many personalities all that well.” I looked him right in the eye, my voice trying to keep low as to not let the others know I was arguing with our host. “Besides, you just want to use me, just like all your other little toys. At least I know Dale has no ill intentions.”
He grabbed at my elbow, pulling me closer. “Yes, but at least I am obvious with my intentions. Wait now, how do you know my intentions? Who says I do not want much more than a quick visit bedding you?”
I pulled away from him disgusted, his eyes staring into me. “Because we both know what kind of person you are!”
“Come now, Annalee. You know I will eventually catch you,” he said, looking me over.
“Well, you are in for a sorry disappointment,” I said, lowering my voice as Dale approached us, smiling lightly.
He actually noticed for once that both Sean and I were suddenly silent. “Is there something wrong?”
“Nothing. Nothing is wrong. Annalee has just told me some things of interest. She is getting rather excitable.”
I turned to Dale, but could still see Sean from the corner of my eye.
“Oh, excitable? Did you tell him?” Dale asked, seeming a bit hopeful.
I shook my head lightly, Sean looking to us both. “Why, yes, she did, I believe.”
“Oh, wonderful!” Dale smiled brightly. “Why don’t we tell everyone else?”
“Uh, no, Sean…I thought we—”
“Everyone, everyone!” Dale called out, cutting me off and silencing me. “Annalee and I have an announcement.”
Everyone in the room turned to us, my entire body screaming ‘no’. But, I couldn’t do much to stop him. He continued on.
“Earlier today I proposed to my dear Annalee. We are engaged!” He put his arm around me and hugged me close to him, still smiling.
I watched as Kimberly and James turned to each other at the table and began to whisper. Peter and Deirdre smiled, making their way over to us.
“Well, this is a happy occasion,” Sean said, smiling, seeming almost pleased with this news.
Peter caught Dale’s attention, Sean quickly turning to me, leaning into my ear, pretending to kiss me on the cheek.
“This is far from over. No ring on your finger is going to stop me from having you. In fact, I feel you will be quite willing by your wedding day to give me exactly what I want.” He then kissed beside my ear before he turned to the crowd gathering around Dale.
I felt my entire body go numb. I didn’t know if his words were a threat or a warning, but whatever, I was a little more than unsettled. My stomach wrenched and my head throbbed.
Sean often threatened me so, but I sensed something was going on, something wasn’t right. I had spent much of the night trying to convince myself I needn’t look into the future. I had tried to convince myself to take this one day at a time. But I couldn’t help the fear of not knowing what the future had in store for me.
Chapter Three
The Dark Newcomer
I was rudely awakened by my drapes being ripped open. My eyes opened, but the sun caused my eyes to squint painfully. Once my vision cleared, I saw Bess organizing the room, throwing a gown over the changing screen.
“Wakey, wakey, time to rise, sunshine.” She came over and whipped the blankets off me with a smile.
I groaned and turned over, trying to bury myself under my pillows, not wanting to face the day, which was like any other.
Bess laughed and smacked my hip. “Come now, you have to get up. We are going to town to pick out your mask.”
I turned over sighing and yawning. She went to my vanity, pulling my hairbrush out of the one drawer in the center and jewelry out of one of the little drawers on the platform below the looking-glass. My eyes went to Higgins, who sat guarding my bed.
“So, how was the party? You were so tired last night you didn’t seem in the chattering mood.” She turned to me, motioning me out of bed.
“Awful. I hated every minute. Dale made an embarrassment of us, announcing we are engaged when he promised me he wouldn’t say anything.”
I threw my feet over the side of my bed, tossing my hair over my shoulder. Higgins sat upright, his head on my lap, his tail wagging as I smiled at him.
“But you are engaged, are you not?” She eyed me, confused, putting out her hands. I grabbed her hands and she pulled me up to my feet, something we had done since I was a little girl.
“No. We are not. I plan to tell Dale today, but so I do not hurt his feelings, I am telling him I need more time to think about the whole thing. It is after all a big decision and I do not want to take said decision lightly.” I turned to the dog, smiling as I motioned to the door. “Go on, Higgins.” He wagged his tail, prancing out of the room.
Bess led me over to the changing screen, pushing me behind it. “I thought you agreed already, though?” She seemed somewhat disappointed, most likely because she wanted me to get married, worried due to my personality, I never would. I guess her motherly instinct wanted me to be happy—just as my father did—wanting her little Annalee to be all grown up and married, have a family of her own. All that normal rubbish.
I struggled out of my nightgown and began to change into my shift, pulling my hair out from the neck. Bess came around with my stays, putting them on me and then fastening them, pulling on the ties tightly.
“No,” I said, “Dale would not let me agree or disagree, he would not let me explain or even finish a bloody sentence.”
I turned as Bess took my bum pad and fastened the contraption around my hips. She then grabbed the green petticoat from over the screen, bunching and raising the material up and over my arms to my hips, tying the drawstring tight, just like my stays. At least the color was green today, not blue. I suppose that was a little less boring.
Bess handed me my white silk stockings, watching as I put them on. She then grabbed an overskirt the same shade of green as the dress, except with yellow stripes. I put my arms through the sleeves, which cut off at my elbows, turning to face her as she held the small left panel and pulled the wider right panel over, fastening the hooks. It was much simpler than a stomacher, which had to be pinned in place to the stays, then the overskirt of the gown needed to be pinned as well. Simplicity. That was what was urged at these times, as well as informality. We are all equal, right?
“Oh. I see. Well. I am sure you will eventually agree,” she said, looking me over. “I suppose you are correct. Marriage is a big decision.”
Once she was satisfied with how my gown sat, she led me over to my vanity, sitting me down. She took the hairbrush and started to comb through my raven-black locks, careful as not to tug on the knots from my slumber too hard. She clipped the ends, a little shorter than I really wanted, as my hair usually came to my elbows. She took off a good three inches, something she did every six weeks or so. She then dressed my hair as per my usual, half gathered at the back and secured with a wooden barrette.
“I just don’t want to make a mistake,” I said, taking my earrings from the vanity top and putting them on my ears. “Once I get married there is no going back. I will not be able to fix anything if things do not work out. I do not want to be wrong. There is a part of me…a part that thinks it would be unwise for me to be so hasty and just accept. Am I making any sense?”
There is something missing.
Bess peered into the looking-glass at me. “Yes Miss, very clear. I understand. I just got over excited, jumped to conclusions.”
She motioned for the necklace on the vanity top, which I handed to her. I lifted my hair and watched as she put the chain around my neck, a jeweled butterfly sparkling against my skin. Once I put my hair down, I straightened and adjusted the trinket until was pe
rfectly centered.
I leaned forward and searched through my little round pink silk jewelry box, pulling out a glittering gold band, the small rectangular cut emerald catching the light, going on my middle finger on my right hand. The piece of jewelry was my mother’s, so I enjoyed wearing it whenever the occasion was fitting, when I wore a green gown.
I stood up, turning to her as she knelt down and help me put on my green silk slippers. She stood up and surveyed me, nodding as her eyes met mine, giving a satisfied smile. “Beautiful, as always.”
I gave her a little smirk.
She put her hand on my cheek. “I want nothing but happiness for you, Annalee. Always.” She leaned forward, kissing my cheek. She turned to the changing screen, gathering my nightgown and heading towards the door. “Your breakfast is on the table. If you hurry you may catch your father before he leaves. We will leave after I am done cleaning up.”
I turned to the looking-glass to my reflection. Was I really beautiful? I bit my bottom lip, shrugging my shoulders.
And if I am? Beauty does not seem to be bringing me any luck.
I sighed, turning to the door and making my way down to the dining room.
My father stood next to the table, his frock coat and breeches matching black with his brown, double-breasted waistcoat beneath. He walked over to the window, which looked out to the yard, looking over the papers in his hands, disturbing Higgins lying beside the table.
As I walked into the room my father looked up and smiled. “Ah, hello, Poppet. How was the party last evening?”
I walked over to the table where my place was already set; coffee, tea, a cup of chocolate, as well as wheat cakes and different breads with jams, jellies and fruit in season.
I sat down, looking up at him. “Horrible, as usual, as all of Sean’s parties are. The only good thing to come out of the whole spectacle is that I am now convinced I need to tell Dale the truth, inform him I need more time to think about life as it is.”
“Yes, Bess told me about Dale being a little more than anxious to tell everyone of the news, of the engagement.” He tried to read the paper over again before he grabbed his glasses from the little pocket of his waistcoat, putting them on and going back to the paper.
I smirked. “She certainly does not waste time with news like that.”
“No,” he laughed, putting his glasses into his pocket again. “Of course not.”
I frowned, looking at my plate, as he walked over to me and kissed me on the cheek.
“I need to be off, I should be home in time for us to get a bridge game in before supper. Give my love to Bess.” He grabbed his Italian valise and made his way to the door.
I sighed, looking at my plate, which had a piece of bread with butter and jelly sitting prettily. I wasn’t very hungry…then again, I never really was in the morning. This did not stop me from tearing a piece off and putting the jelly slathered piece in my mouth. I began to stare off into the distance, my eyes relaxing as the word ‘bridge’ echoed in my head making me think about the man from the night before.
I stopped and jumped up, calling out, “Daddy! Wait!”
I ran up to him as he grabbed his hat and opened the door. “Yes, Annalee?”
I swallowed the piece of bread hard. “Do you know of anyone new coming into town? Or perhaps anyone who has passed through? Last night I saw someone who was not familiar to me.”
His eyes went to the floor, thinking, his mustache wiggling a bit. “No, I do not think so. Perhaps as you said, just passing through. I have not had anyone drop by the office.”
I nodded. “Oh. Oh never mind then. I will see you this evening.” I leaned up and kissed him on the cheek, seeing him out the door.
I felt somewhat foolish. Not embarrassed, though I still remembered the horrid feeling the night before, but I was going to be careful as not duplicate the emotion. I refused. But, I couldn’t help wondering about him—my stranger—even though I didn’t really understand what I thought was so interesting about him. I saw lots of people on the streets and they never interested me.
I mean, I could barely make out his features. I couldn’t even give anyone an accurate description of him! Yet, he was on my mind, a mystery that intrigued and bewildered me. I guess that was what was so appealing, he was a mystery. We often question the unknown.
I turned in the open foyer, to my right being a wall until that ran past the staircase, continuing on the other side, leading into the wing which held the library, my father’s office, and the servant’s quarters. To the left was the sitting room and then the open dining room, which had the door to the kitchen on the opposite wall to the foyer.
I walked back into the dining area, over to the ten foot windows, looking out to the yard and the fountain, the field beyond.
Bess walked in, putting her hands on her hips. “You have barely touched your breakfast. We will not leave until you have eaten something, dearie. You will feel faint if you do not.”
She grabbed my elbow gently and ushered me back to the table, where I sat as she bustled off to do some more chores before we left for town, her brown skirt waving through the door to the kitchen.
Higgins got up sleepily and walked over beside me, flopping down and closing his eyes again.
I slowly began eating my bread and jelly, my mind drifting off. I knew Dale was going to be visiting around four in the afternoon, which would be my opportunity to tell him exactly how I felt.
I, of course, didn’t want to upset him, to hurt his feelings, but I knew that would probably be the end result. Being married to Dale was not something I wanted to do. No matter how much time I gave myself to think about on the matter, I would most definitely not change my opinion. I knew being married to Dale would be a mistake.
I could not shake the feeling something was missing, something important. I could not tell Dale of my feelings. To do so would break his heart. I still valued him as a friend…didn’t I?
When I was done my breakfast, I made my way into the kitchen, bringing Bess my dishes. She turned to me suddenly. “Annalee! I told you I would come and get your dishes, there is no need for you to be in here.” She took the dirty dishes from my hands.
My father may have been a well-regarded physician, but he was not wealthy enough to hire an entire staff. Bess could do her duties as my maid, as well as making meals. We had one other servant, who cleaned the home each day, but I rarely ever saw her.
“I am quite capable of bringing you some dishes. My legs are not broken Bess,” I said as she pushed me towards the door. She began to untie her apron as she got me to the door.
“I do not care what you are or are not capable of; in this topsy-turvy world young ladies do not bring their dishes in to the help.” She slammed her apron down, shooing me out the door and chasing me out in to the foyer. “Now, let’s go up to get you ready to leave.”
We went back up to my bedchamber, Bess retrieving my light green pierrot, much different from the style of the past, replacing my overskirt. The front buttoned at the top before cutting away in an upside down V-shape, cutting off at my waist, flaring out delicately at the back, a modesty piece filling out the empty space. Edged with dark green velvet, a little bit of lace stuck out from the sleeves, which cut off at my wrists, finished with three big black buttons.
Bess helped me pin my silk green brimmed hat on my head, dark green ribbons tied in bows around the small tier.
When we reached the bottom landing, Bess threw her brown cloak over her shoulders, ushering me out of the house and into the carriage. The ride to town was short, since our manor was on the very outskirts of London.
We stopped in front of one of the many shops and I glanced to my right out the window of the carriage, catching a glimpse of a dark figure across by the apothecary’s. I instantly recognized his tall frame, stunned to realize he was the man from the night before!
I grabbed hold of Bess’ arm excitedly, pulling on her. “Bess! Look!”
I smiled and gestured exc
itedly towards the apothecary’s shop. I had only turned away for a moment, but when I turned back, he was gone.
Bess surveyed the area. “What, what is it?”
I did the same, my eyes searching for him, but was saddened to find he was truly gone. My smile faded. I only saw him for a moment, seeing his profile as his eyes were pointed down at something in his hands.
I sighed heavily as Bess helped me out of the carriage and down the street into a jewelry shop. I can admit though, I continued to look around for my strange newcomer. He was obviously in town for more than just simply passing through.
“Now, you should look at these ones. They are beautiful,” Bess said as we peered through the window at the Venetian masks.
We entered the shop, the shopkeeper approaching us, as he knew me from my father, as well as my previous purchases. He showed us many beautiful masks, my decision to pick the simplest one being of great discomfort to both Bess and the shopkeeper. I was happy with my decision. The top of the dainty mask swooped down before leaping up into a hook shape, gliding down to make a small peak before it swirled to the right side. A lovely light pink, it would complement my complexion, though gold tumbling filigree designs engulfed the mask, little jewels on the tips of the curls. It had no feathers, no material bunched at the side. The half mask was a perfect match for my gown, covering only my eyes, leaving the rest of my face free.
“Are you sure about this one?” Bess asked, holding out the small blue box with a pink ribbon as we walked onto the street. “We could always get you one a little more extravagant.”
“No, Bess,” I said, sighing as I rubbed at my finger, a habit of mine when I’m nervous or agitated. I stopped, looking down, not seeing my ring on my finger. “My ring!”
“What?” Bess asked.
“My ring!” I shouted frantically, looking around. “I lost my ring!”
I broke away from her, looking all over the ground for the shining emerald, hoping it would catch my eye. I stopped as a hand was suddenly before me, a velvety voice ringing in my ears with an American accent.
Out of My Grave Page 4