O.J.

by Penny Hawking

  “Nice to meet you ma’am.” Andy said reaching out his hand.

  My mom looked at his tattooed arm slowly but reached out and shook his hand. She gave a faint polite smile. “Tu parles français?” You speak French?

  Andy looked at me nervously. “Uh…I don’t understand.”

  My mom pursed her lips.

  “Mom stop, he doesn’t speak French…English please.” I said.

  “Humph.” She said releasing his hand. “Pourquoi il a tous c’est tatouage huh?” Why does he have all those tattoos?

  “Arrête.” Stop. I whined as I tugged her arm. “Mommy dearest I was just telling Andy all about how nice and sweet and just the darling mother you are.” I said wrapping my arms around her neck.

  My mom rolled her eyes at me and turned to stare at Andy. She looked him up and down, scrutinizing him.

  I held my breath. Please don’t be rude. Please don’t be rude. Please don’t be rude.

  “When’s the last time you ate?” She asked.

  I hit the palm of my hand against my forehead.

  “Um…” Andy started. He sounded like a little kid.

  “Nee-nee.” Fleur called out.

  I instinctively brushed my jeans and she came over to me.

  “Is Andy really that skinny?” She asked as she gently touched my leg.

  “No he’s not….mom leave him alone.” I said annoyed.

  My mom circled Andrew like a vulture and lifted his left arm. “This child looks like he hasn’t eaten in days…why don’t you cook for him?” She asked accusing me.

  Andy turned his head towards me.

  “What?” I said my jaws dropping. “Why would I cook for him he’s not my husband.”

  “I raised you better than that.” Gisele said shooing me away with her hand. “Oh you poor thing.” My mom said turning to Andy. She patted his shoulder. “Come, Are you hungry?” she asked.

  Andy started shaking his head, but I quickly signaled for him to stop. He caught my gesture from the corners of his eye. “Um…a little bit….” My mother smiled. “I don’t eat that much because Ornelia said not to or I would get fat…and she doesn’t like fat people.” Andy added his voice full of sorrow.

  I gasped.

  My mom shot me an evil look, and from where she was she managed to push my head to the side as she grabbed his hand.

  “He’s lying!” I stammered out of shock.

  “Nee-nee!” My mom said. She turned to Andy as he gave her an innocent look. “Come on child we’re having dinner earlier today anyways. We gotta put some meat on that pale thin body of yours.” She commanded as she pulled him to the dining room.

  Fleur happily followed with Bubbles at her heels. Andy looked back and smirked.

  I shook my fist at him. ‘Imma fight you.’ I mouthed at him. Andy gave a small smile as he turned back around and disappeared around the corner with my mother and sister.

  I laughed gently as I crossed my arms. This really was going to be a good break after all. I started walking towards the dining room when Bubbles let out a bark.

  “Cece’s here.” Fleur said happily.

  I stopped walking.

  I heard ecstatic screaming and laughing. “Oh I missed you guys so much!” I heard Celine’s annoying angelic voice.

  Oh FML! I thought as I threw my hands in the air.

  “Oh hey, who’s this?” Celine asked pleasantly.

  Chapter eleven

  “So…how did you meet Nee-nee?” Celine asked Andy as she passed me the green beans.

  “Don’t call me that.” I muttered only for her to hear. I hated hearing her say that, only Fleur was allowed to call me that. I served myself some green beans and ignored her look.

  “We uh…we have class together.” Andy answered. He was sitting right across from me so I passed him the green beans. I gave him a small smile. How cute he said we have class together…

  “Oh, what class is that?” Celine asked. Andy returned his attention to Celine

  “Who cares?” I asked. “Stop trying to make dumb conversation.”

  “Ornelia, stop that.” Gisele said from the head of the table.

  “It is dumb.” I mumbled as I cut my steak. I saw Andy look at me as though trying to discern my thoughts. I shrugged at him and picked up a green bean with my hand, ignoring the scowl on my mom’s face.

  Celine shrugged and gave a small smile. “Well sorry for trying to start a dinner conversation Nee-nee?” She said as she brought the glass of wine to her lips.

  “I told you to stop calling me that.” I said cutting up the steak and putting a piece in my mouth. Oh my, food orgasm right about now!

  Celine sighed. “It’s a family nickname Nee-nee, what do you want me to call you?” She asked as she rubbed her brows.

  Why the hell is she still talking? “Ornelia is fine, you can call me Ornelia…better yet how about you just don’t call me anything huh? Don’t even bother to talk about me.” I said giving her a fake smile. I happily took a big piece of the sautéed potatoes and ate it.

  Andy raised his eyebrow at me.

  “The food is good.” I said, very aware that everybody’s eyes were on me.

  “Girls….” Gisele said in a warning tone as she took a sip of her wine.

  “I was just trying to start a conversation.” Celine said turning to look at me in disbelief. Oh yeah play the victim you’re so fucking good at that.

  “Fine.” I said putting down my fork. “You want to talk, let’s talk about you…every topic is going to come back to you anyways so lets just start there and skip all the unnecessary crap.” I said.

  “Nee-nee…” Gisele said in an annoyed tone.

  “I’m just being honest.” I told my mom. I didn’t look across at Andy because for some reason I was aware that his gaze hadn’t drifted off me. Okay why was he still staring at me?

  “Seriously Nee-nee, we just got here…are we really about to start this?” Celine asked.

  Andy slowly turned his gaze to Celine. Celine looked up and caught it. She looked down guiltily. “Sorry.” She said apologizing to Andy for her behavior.

  I imitated her sorry silently by just moving my mouth.

  “Andy do you take pictures like Nee-nee?” Fleur asked loudly. She was sitting right next to Andy so there was no need for her to raise her voice, but it got both mine and Celine’s attention. Fleur hated confrontations. I glared at Celine and then returned my attention back to my plate. I was fuming, yes I was being irrational, I understand that…but you can’t understand how it feels being in the same room with Celine, it’s like she does everything to suck the air out of my very body.

  “No...I’m not that talented.” Andy said turning his focus to Fleur on his right.

  I looked up at him in surprise. Did he really think I was talented? I poked my green beans and ate some more. “Oh how sweet Andy, that’s the nicest thing you’ve ever told me.” I said grinning.

  “I’m sure I’ve told you other nice things.” Andy said eating his potatoes.

  “Like what?” I asked slyly.

  “Always fishing for compliments huh?” Celine said softly as she sipped her wine.

  I turned in my seat to face her. “You know what Celine---”

  “Nee-nee…” Fleur said in an exasperated tone. I looked in her direction and turned back away from Celine. It wasn’t worth Fleur’s sad face.

  I threw my hands up and angrily stabbed my steak.

  “Please do excuse my daughters’ behavior.” Gisele told Andy. I rolled my eyes. “What do you study?” Gisele asked the boy. She was very picky when it came to who her daughters hung out with. Nico had barely passed but thankfully he was a business major so he wasn’t all that bad.

  “I’m an English major ma’am.” Andy said eating his green beans slowly.

  Celine smiled. “I love English.” She said happily.

  Andy smiled back at her.

  I stabbed a potato. He’s my friend!

  “Oh.” Gisele said
. “And what do you do with that?”

  “I uh…um…” Andy turned to look at me. “I um…write.”

  I narrowed my eyes at him and gave him a small confused look. I had no idea he wrote.

  “That’s interesting.” Celine said. “What is it exactly that you write?”

  I rolled my eyes as she talked. “He writes words.” I said.

  Andy smiled at Celine. “I uh…actually…I’ve written a couple songs.” He scratched his nose. “For like…bands and stuff.”

  “That’s really interesting.” Celine said.

  “Cool.” Fleur said smiling in his direction.

  “I didn’t know you wrote songs.” I said moving my food around my plate. Andy nodded. I watched him closely. What more don’t I know about you huh?

  “Christian songs?” Gisele asked.

  I groaned and rolled my eyes.

  Andy chewed on his steak. He turned to my mom. “Uhm…no ma’am.” He answered. Andy sat up straighter in his seat. “The bands that hire me are usually ummm….gothic, emo…kind of stuff, like rock…” He said putting his fork down.

  “Rock n roll?” She asked.

  I sighed. I knew exactly where this was going. Please don’t say devil music…

  Andy gave me a quick look and then turned back to my mom. “Um…yeah…uh you could say that ma’am.”

  “Devil music?” Gisele asked.

  “Mom!” Celine and I said simultaneously.

  “Andy ignore that.” I said giving my mom a look that she promptly ignored.

  “Well um no ma’am.” Andy said continuing the conversation. “I don’t really know what devil music is, but all the bands I’ve written for, I’m pretty sure none of them have been devil worshippers if that’s what you’re getting at.”

  My mother scoffed.

  Go Andy! I thought as I looked in him in appreciation. He drank his wine and gave me an apologetic look. I shrugged and grinned. ‘You’re good.’ I mouthed.

  “Are you a Christian Andy?” My mom asked putting her fork down.

  Andy looked at me like a deer in headlights. He shifted in his seat.

  “Mom can you please stop, interrogating our guest?” I asked as I put my fork down. “We just got here, and we’re kinda tired.”

  “It was just a question Nee-nee.” Gisele said as she ate one of her sautéed potatoes. “Are you a Christian son?”

  “Mom I think Nee-nee’s right…you are being a little---.” Celine said.

  “I can talk for myself.” I said. I don’t remember asking for Celine’s input.

  “I know you can talk for yourself, but we both know I can explain better.” Celine said annoyed.

  I was mad, even though what she said was true. “Oh do forgive me…I forgot a lawyer was present…us other peasants shouldn’t dare talk because we wouldn’t know how to express ourselves without a law book to guide us.” I said bitterly.

  “I didn’t mean that and you know it.” Celine said.

  “Then let me talk.” I said.

  “No ma’am I’m not.” Andy said speaking up and answering my mom’s question.

  I sighed. That was a bad move on his part.

  “I’m agnostic.” He finished. I put my fork down and refrained from gasping. That was a bold move for him to tell my mom something like that. Andy rubbed his right arm.

  My mom’s wine glass came down and she raised her eyebrow high.

  “What does that mean?” Fleur asked tapping the table.

  The table was silent. Andy looked around uncomfortably.

  “Well…it means that I think it’s impossible for us to know for sure whether there’s a God or not. I mean I’m not saying there isn’t a God and I’m not saying I’m an atheist but…how can we be 100% sure…I mean yeah there could be a higher power, it would make sense on how life is created….but then if that’s the case then a lot of other shi---stuff that happens in life don’t make sense. I mean for all I know a bunch of rich old guys got together and….” Andy shrugged as he bit into his bread. “…were bored one day and decided to make religion, to start war and get money.” Andy rubbed his right arm.

  I was speechless. So was the rest of my family. I was also in awe…in a weird way even though I wasn’t agnostic, I got a certain level of respect for him. I knew the reason he could think like this was because he must have gone through a lot of shit

  “What do your parents think of your viewpoint?” Gisele asked.

  “Mom!” I said shocked. Sometimes she really went too far.

  Andy didn’t miss a beat. “They were Christians…but where are they now huh?” He asked. “I guess if there is a God…he needed them more.”

  Oh my God, this is embarrassing, I have to apologize for my mom’s behavior later.

  My mom’s face fell. I saw her face and I could see that she could decipher now where he was coming from. I sighed. Good, she gets it now. I love my mom.

  “Well young man, there is a God.” Gisele said confidently. “And he loves you.”

  Andy took a big gulp of his wine and bit into his French bread. “Well ma’am when you speak to God….you be sure to ask him what he has against me.” Andy said seriously.

  Celine looked down at her plate. My mom kept a soft curious look on Andy. I wanted to reach over and grab his hand but he had his hands placed in his lap. This boy was so sad, it was killing me. Finally he looked up at me guilty. I smiled to let him know it was okay.

  “The food was really good. Thank you ma’am” Andy said putting his fork down on the empty plate.

  Nobody said anything.

  Andy rubbed his neck. “Ma’am I didn’t mean to offen---.”

  My mom shooed his apologies aside. “As long as you’re not a devil worshipper, you’re good in my book…and son I’ll make sure to talk to God about you.” She said raising her wine glass at him and smiling gently

  I smiled at my mom. She really didn’t mean any harm…she meant it out of the goodness of her heart, I would have to talk to Andy later to make sure he wasn’t offended.

  “So Celine, how did your mock trials go?” Gisele asked turning the conversation over to her second favorite topic. The first was telling me to be more like Celine. Yeah like that will ever happen

  “Great.” Celine said excitedly.

  I slumped in my chair. Here we go again. I tuned her out as I watched Andy. He was sitting back in his chair staring at Celine but not really seeing her I guess. He rubbed his right arm absently as he zoned out. He must’ve sensed me watching him because he finally turned his gorgeous blue eyes back on me. He looked down at his lap for a while and then I felt my thigh vibrate.

  I reached down and took out my cellphone.

  I didn’t mean to offend your family, especially not your mom

  I smiled. This kid was so cute. Don’t worry, you didn’t offend anybody, my mom likes you otherwise she would’ve not talked to you at all. I texted back.

  Andy looked down and smiled softly.

  Thanks. He texted back

  I smiled at the response. You welcome. I’m so bored. We should sext or something. I replied teasingly. I bit my bottom lip as I sent it and looked up quickly to see his reaction.

  Andy looked down as he read the text. I expected him to look up in shock or immediately text back a vehement no…but he stared at the text for a long time. I was intrigued. Was he contemplating it? I was joking, but if he went with it so would I. I saw a small smile on his face as his fingers started moving.

  Okay me first. I’m so aroused right now, I cannot wait to carry you into the sexual intercourse room formerly known as your bedroom and expertly remove your granny panties (they have to be white granny panties, those are the only thing that brings me to a full arousal) anyways I will remove your granny panties with my skilled pinky toe. Your turn.

  I got the text and burst out laughing. I have no idea how Andy managed to write that with a serious face.

  “Would you like to share what’s so funny ma chérie?” Gisele a
sked.

  I looked up, not realizing that I had in fact laughed out loud. I looked at Andy and he stared at me with a straight face. I laughed again and shook my head. “No mom…I just…I just have a tendency to burst into random fits of laughter.”

  “While your sister was explaining her case?” Gisele asked.