by Dawson, H A
Her feet made a click-clack sound on the pavement. She wanted to deaden the sound, feeling a little too conspicuous in her designer outfit, and stepped with less force. If her stalker were trailing her, it would be easy to muffle her cries in the back streets. Nonetheless, she had one advantage; she knew the maze of alleys and factory yards intimately. Encouraged by her belief that she could outwit him, she loosened her hand from her jacket and glimpsed back at the car. She appeared to be alone.
It was strange revisiting this part of her life again, and she saw things she had never before noticed, or at least not remembered, from the fancy architecture on the aging buildings to the high position of the ground floor windows. However, when she arrived at the first passageway set between the factory and a row of terraced houses, there were no surprises.
She stopped and peered along the narrow length. Out of view was a small parking space. It had been her first nightly home, as well as the place she had spent her first night with Joe, and whilst it had provided her with a bit of personal space, as well as security, her reason for being there had left her bereft. Jade could not remember why she had run off, after the fire rather than teaming up with Kath, as those memories had gone, but she did know that nothing could have been done to make her return. Her terror was of a magnitude never before encountered and her losses and misfortune incomprehensible.
Jade leaned against the wall, tucking into the passage, and held her hand to her stomach. Her insides were swirling and her sickness tightened her throat. What had happened to make her so afraid, and what part had Kath played? Fearing another flashback, she started to leave.
A snuffling sound alerted her. Jade stopped dead in her tracks, just near the end of the passage, and craned her neck to see into the space. An old man with a straggly beard and long ragged hair was swigging beer. He was sat on piles of cardboard and wrapped in a blanket, and the air stank of alcohol and unwashed clothes. She pinched her nose and edged backwards.
‘Who’s there?’ the man cried, his voice gruff.
Her heartbeat quickened. She held her breath.
‘Show yourself you scumbag.’
She peered around the wall and abridged the gaps in her memories. There were buildings to two sides, a freestanding brick building along another, and a tall wall and a large shrub at the rear. But something was missing. Where were her belongings, her desolation, and her lack of hope?
‘What you want?’ the man asked.
‘I’m sorry. I didn’t know anyone was here.’
‘Well I am, so clear off.’
A sympathetic gaze locked in her eyes, remembering how she had felt when her privacy had been invaded. Like the man, she had only had a few cardboard boxes and a blanket, but they had been her life’s worth and had kept her out of the chill at night. If anyone had taken them, it would have been like someone had stolen a piece of jewellery, such was its importance.
‘I’m sorry,’ she reached into her bag and pulled ten pounds from her purse. ‘Take this.’
He looked at her with suspicion in his eyes, and then reached out his hand, forcing her to move towards him. She felt ridiculously out of place in her floral mini dress and high heels, and her shame lowered her gaze.
‘What you want?’ he asked.
‘Nothing.’ She passed him a fleeting glimpse and edged towards the alley.
‘I don’t want no trouble.’
‘You won’t get any.’
‘You a cop?’
‘No.’ She gawked. ‘No I’m not.’
‘You’re a bit too fancy for these parts.’
She held a hesitant gaze. If he had seen her eighteen years ago he wouldn’t have said that. He would have said she was where she belonged.
‘Make sure you get yourself a hot meal,’ Jade said, ‘there used to be a good place with cheap quality food on Sutton Street.’
‘Don’t I know you?’
‘What? I don’t think so.’
She scurried down the alley. He was quick to follow. It was then she realised he wasn’t as old as she had thought, and saw hidden behind his grey pallor, a youthful, smooth skin.
‘You used to hang around these parts,’ he said.
She pressed her hand tight on her handbag. ‘It was a long time ago. I . . . I was having problems.’
‘Thought so. I’m Hazza.’
Jade held her hand to her mouth. The name was familiar, but she couldn’t place his face.
‘Who are you?’
‘Jade.’
‘That’s right.’ He huddled his blanket around his shoulder. ‘You used to hang around with a lad with a limp.’
‘Joe.’
‘That’s it. You had his kid.’
Jade looked to her feet. ‘He didn’t survive.’
Hazza studied her. He seemed puzzled.
‘He was stillborn.’
‘Oh. I saw Joe in the Fighting Cock and he . . . never mind.’
She raised an eyebrow, urging him on.
‘I used to see him a fair bit back then. He never said the kid died.’
‘He probably didn’t want to. I left straight after it happened and I haven’t seen him since.’
‘You seem to have done all right for yourself.’
‘It’s been a long road. Don’t ever give up hope. Something will turn up.’
‘You think?’
She nodded and made a swift move to leave. He grabbed her arm. Her tension heightened.
‘You should visit Joe,’ he said.
She yanked free her arm and gave him an assertive stare. The tension in his face dissolved, and was swiftly replaced by a smile.
‘I’m sure he’d be pleased to see you,’ he continued.
Jade smiled. It was possible he was right.
Shifting between first and third gear with regular frequency, Jade battled the late afternoon traffic heading for home. Even though her outing had been pointless, it was tantalising receiving a suggestion that Joe would be pleased to see her, and it reminded her of how he had relished her very being.
He was bound to be supportive of her problems. He always had been, in fact they had always had an open and honest relationship. He would never have betrayed her in the way William had. Never.
Visiting Kath was unforgivable. How could he do such a thing?
Scowling, she trundled into the driveway, parked the car and grabbed her handbag. As she stomped towards the house door, she caught sight of the weeds in the paving and the fine cracks in the plant pots, a reminder of William’s lax attitude. He was meant to do something about it; he had promised. He had let her down again.
Clamping shut her jaw she opened the door. William was swift to greet her with a kiss and a smile, then stepped to the kitchen to make her a drink, but rather than his gay manner soothing, it irritated. He should be full of apologies and admitting to his deceit, and not trying to win her over. Didn’t he care that he had deceived her? Keeping her thoughts sealed behind her lips, waiting for the right moment, she placed her handbag onto a dining chair.
‘Kelsey called,’ William said.
‘Is she okay?’
‘Yes. She’s got classes this evening so she won’t be able to speak to you.’
‘They work them very hard. It’ll do her good.
William poured the water into the mugs and stirred.
‘Did she mention a boy?’
‘She did.’
‘What did she say?’
‘Not much.’
‘I’m going to have to ring her. When do her classes start?’
William spun around. ‘Don’t do that. She's okay.’
‘Why? She’s my daughter. I have every right to speak to her.’
‘I know, but . . .’
‘But what?’
He scurried past, carrying the drinks and heading to the lounge.
‘What did she say?’ she asked, following.
He gave her an anxious look.
‘William? Tell me.’
‘She doesn�
��t want you pestering her about him, and she asked me to tell you to stop sending worrisome text messages. You’re freaking her out.’
‘But I have to know if he’s connected to the stalker.’
‘He’s not. He’s just a normal fourteen year old boy. He likes her, that’s all.’
‘You can’t know that. He could be anyone . . . they could be related.’
‘Jade . . .’
‘She’s my little girl,’ she continued, ‘I’ve every right to be worried.’
‘She’s almost thirteen and very mature for her age. She can handle it.’
He flicked on the television and sank onto the armchair, directing his eyes onto the large flat screen. He didn’t seem concerned by her comments, and even appeared a tad disinterested in her woes, disregarding them with natural ease.
‘She’s still very young,’ Jade said, ‘she might be mature for her age, but she hasn’t any experience behind her. It’s our job to protect her.’
William remained silent.
‘I’m going to contact them. I don’t like what’s going on.’
‘Just let it go . . . it’s what Kelsey wants.’
‘How can I? Someone is tracking me, and they know Lord knows what about me. It’s entirely possible that they are onto her as well.’
‘There is no connection to the stalker. Trust me.’
Jade looked to him, searching his expression and requesting proof, but he didn’t elaborate and turned away, flicking through the channels with the remote control. It forced her to wonder if Kath had admitted to the crime and so she waited for him to offer an explanation. When she realised he didn’t intend to speak, she slipped away and searched the contents of her bag for her phone.
Footsteps padded the hallway. She looked up and caught sight of William’s shamefaced expression.
‘Don’t be angry but I went to see Kath today,’ he said.
‘I was wondering when you were going to tell me.’
‘You knew?’
‘I saw you there. I was going to see her.’
‘Oh.’ He leaned into the doorframe and shuffled his feet.
‘You had no right. I told you I was handling it.’
‘Jade . . . I’m sorry, but I didn’t think you’d do anything. This sicko means business. I was worried.’
‘Worried or not, it’s no excuse.’
He averted his gaze.
‘What I don’t understand is why you’d think I was lying when I’d said I’d do something about it,’ she said.
‘You must admit you have preferred to hide from the truth in the past.’
‘How do you work that out?’
William had an isn’t-it-obvious look on his face.
Jade looked to the tablecloth, tracing the light chequered pattern and searching for blemishes. Her ignorance wasn’t a preference; it was merely the better of the two options. But what did it matter? William had made up his mind and he wasn’t going to be swayed.
‘Kath wasn’t upset I’d approached her,’ William said.
‘I don’t believe that.’
‘Really.’ He passed her an intense gaze. ‘Why didn’t you ever tell her about your amnesia?’
He had meddled again. Didn’t he know when to stop? ‘It was none of her business, that’s why. And it’s not important . . . and we’re not exactly best buddies.’
‘Even so, she is your sister.’
She took a deep breath, counted to ten, and forced herself to be civil. ‘How did she take it?’
‘She was surprised, as you’d expect.’
‘Did you get a sense she was the stalker?’
‘No I didn’t.’
‘I did tell you. I knew it wouldn’t be her.’
William hesitated. ‘She could be very good at hiding it.’
Jade stared at him, bewildered by his response. By his own admission, Kath had not appeared to be the stalker, yet he was still unwilling to accept it. What was his problem, and why was he so determined to cause friction in their already tense relationship?
‘You should speak to her,’ William continued, ‘I’m sure she’d like that.’
Jade rubbed her arms as a chill traversed her body. ‘And that’s exactly what I had intended to do until you ruined it.’
‘I’m sorry, but it’s done now. It doesn’t stop you going over.’
‘Of course it does.’
‘I don’t see why.’
‘I’m not going to ask her the very same questions you did, now am I?’
‘You could ask different questions. I think she knows something.’
‘No! I won’t do your dirty work. She’s not involved and that’s that.’
William frowned.
‘How many times do I have to tell you that she’s not the stalker?’
‘Maybe not, but she still might know something. There’s no harm in pursuing this.’
Exasperated she pushed back the chair with her feet, stood up, and stomped towards the kitchen worktop.
‘Kath still has her memories in tact. You don’t. Doesn’t that tell you something?’
‘No, it doesn’t. I’m not stupid. If someone else was involved with my family I would remember.’
‘Okay, so who’s a suspect?’
‘I don’t know!’
He was making her feel like an idiot. Holding a rigid posture, she reminded herself of her conversation with Hazza. He had remembered her, yet she hadn’t been able to recall anything. Wasn’t that proof that not everyone or everything that had happened in her past was remembered with clarity, and that was disregarding the amnesia.
She looked up and caught his gaze. ‘I’m more likely to remember if you stop your pestering.’
He frowned and turned away.
‘I know you mean well William, and I thank you for that, but I just don’t appreciate you going behind my back. Kath and I . . . well, it’s difficult enough as it is.’
‘If you’d have told me you planned to go over-’
‘I can’t tell you everything, nor should I have to. It was a spur of the moment decision.’
‘Okay, I’m sorry, but please don’t shut me out. You mean the world to me. I don’t want this to come between us.’
‘It won’t.’
‘I was there at the start. It’s not as if we have any secrets.’
Jade swallowed hard. ‘I promise I’ll try to keep you in the picture.’
‘There’s something else I should tell you,’ he said, taking her hand. ‘When you returned home last night, I could see something was wrong. It was obvious you’d been crying and I thought that sicko had hurt you. I was worried. I . . .’ he hesitated, caught her worried gaze, ‘. . . I didn’t think you were going to do anything about it.’
‘But I know all this. That’s why you went to see Kath.’
He looked to the wooden floor. ‘I did something else.’
‘Go on.’
‘When I got back home, before I went to Kath’s there was a message on the phone from Luke Adams. Why didn’t you keep your appointment?’
‘Because it’s all a waste of time.’ Jade yanked free her hand and scurried out of the room. Standing at the lounge window, and gazing blindly into the garden, she chastised herself for giving Luke her home number.
‘You’re in denial again.’
She spun around and glared at William.
‘Sorry, bad choice of words, but you are trying to bury your hand in the sand.’
‘I’m not. I’ll do any investigating myself. I don’t need help from you, or Luke or anyone.’
‘So what do you intend to do?’
Jade’s mouth was clamped. She was going to meet with Joe, but she could not tell him that.
‘Look, lets not drag this out more than necessary,’ he said, ‘I’ve made another appointment, and I’ll make sure I get home in time to meet him with you. We’re going to handle this together . . . work as a team like we used to.’
‘He’s coming here?’
&nbs
p; ‘Yes, tomorrow. He has another call to make in the area and said he would pop in on his way back to the office. It’ll be four o’clock, or thereabouts.’
‘Four o’clock!’ She glared, her mind whirring. That was when she was meeting with Joe. She didn’t want to cancel, not now, not after they had finally made contact again.
William rested his hand on her shoulder. ‘It will be okay. I’ll be with you.’
‘But, I-’
‘I think you’re very brave doing this. I’m very proud of you.’
He pulled her towards him, and after a few seconds, she sank into his warm, spongy body. His breath tickled her neck, and his arms providing a welcome sense of security. She had always felt safe in his company, and she had always trusted him.
‘It is the right thing to do,’ he continued.
Regardless of what the truth was and how it may hurt her, her more mature side told her it was the right decision. Even so, there was her meeting with Joe to consider. She could not, would not, turn her back on her ex-lover. Not now, not after years apart.
He pulled away, ‘are you angry?’
Reluctantly, she shook her head.
Chapter 7
Normally, Luke’s heart swelled in Ava’s presence. Not today. All he could feel was the gentle pitter-patter of his quickening heartbeat as his fear forced a more restrained approach. He could not afford to display a silly grin or make nonsensical sounds, and hoped that if he stayed away from her, remaining as quiet as possible, his gorgeous newborn daughter would not awaken.
He edged back to his desk, sat on his swivel chair, and continued to stare. What if she needed a nappy change or a feed? Would he manage it without Sarah’s assistance? Would he do it right? He looked to the black digital timepiece set upon the office wall and his shoulders tightened; two hours seemed like such a long time to carry out his duty single-handed.
Urging his concentration, he returned his attention to the computer screen. He had only returned to work yesterday having allowed himself time off for paternity leave, and he had spent all day trying to settle into a routine. It had been a struggle getting Ava Rose out of his head, and it certainly wasn’t going to be any easier with her only a few metres away.