Starting Over: The Broken Hearts Club

by Michele Barlow

  “Here’s my phone. You put in your number and I’ll text you the address. Six o’clock and wear something you won’t mind BBQ stains on. Because I go all in when there is a rack of ribs in front of me,” he said with a smile as he held out his phone.

  “Messy eater? Good to know.” Dear lord she was flirting. She wasn’t sure she remembered how, but apparently it was like riding a bike. Giggle, bat your eyelashes, make a funny remark. Easy.

  “Normally I teach my kids to have their best table manners, but they only eat with sporks so it’s easy.”

  “Sporks,” she laughed. “So… tomorrow. Can’t wait!” She said this a little too enthusiastically but she was feeling that uncomfortable place of having to finish a conversation with someone you didn’t really know. You can’t say goodbye abruptly, because that would be rude. There wasn’t the easy sign off of “love you,” like you said to your parents or significant other. It was somewhere in between.

  Evan leaned over the counter and Cambry felt him deeply in her space. He smelled good, even over the cacophony of smells surrounding her, he smelled like a light cologne that had been sitting on his skin long enough to become its own woodsy man smell.

  “I look forward to seeing you, Cambry. I mean that.”

  She thought for a moment he was going to kiss her. His eyes slid down to her lips for the briefest of moments and she felt her breath catch.

  He leaned back and winked before walking away.

  Was that creepy? Or was that sincere? Or possibly creepily sincere. Cambry needed her girls again. She knew she couldn’t send them her SOS until break time because her phone would most likely blow up.

  “Did you just get asked out?”

  Rob the fry cook peered around the corner with a spatula still in his hand.

  “I think I did. And I think I said yes.”

  “You totally did. He wears a tie. Nice. He sell cars or something?”

  “Or something,” she replied. Discussing her love life or lack thereof with Rob the Twisty Cup Fry Cook was not going to help her get through her shift without a mini freak-out.

  Mini freak-outs were okay, major ones usually included her locking herself in the bathroom with nothing but a nightlight and the comforter off her bed. During the trial, it had been the only place that she felt safe, and was quiet enough for her thoughts.

  It had become an odd crutch that she was trying to break. Also, because her parents would bang on the bathroom door and ask her if she had diarrhea if she stayed in there too long.

  She really needed her own place.

  Chapter 7

  Evan walked back out to his car and was decided that it was his lucky day. He should go buy a lottery ticket he was feeling so cocky. Stopping into the Twisty Cup was not something he normally did. He usually hit the drive-thru when he wanted something fast, but never walked in. Today he hadn’t felt like yelling his order to a staticky box with someone on the other side asking him to repeat himself three times.

  When he went in the there was a little chaos behind the counter.

  “When is Cambry getting here?”

  A whining young man behind the counter was complaining to a man in a short-sleeved dress shirt and clip-on tie.

  “When her shift starts, you aren’t leaving early, so please see to the customers.”

  Evan couldn’t imagine that this was somewhere that Cambry worked and he had managed to find her by chance. He should have just taken his coffee and left, but something made him stay. He took a seat and kept his eyes on the door.

  It wasn’t long before she walked in.

  He had smiled, made sure that she knew he was happy to see her, and he had gotten her to say yes to dinner.

  He’d been thinking about her a lot. She was in his dreams. His dreams that had him waking up uncomfortable and hard. Taking care of his needs only made him think of her more. He’d love to worship her until she screamed and the neighbors called the cops. He’d gladly tell the police exactly what caused all the ruckus. It wasn’t often someone so perfect fell into your world. Evan was also sure that you weren’t supposed to ignore the gifts the universe presented.

  It had been a long time since he had dated. Years in fact. He found that either he was constantly being hit on by single mothers, very married mothers, or that anyone he did date was suspicious of the parents at his school. His job also meant he sometimes worked long hours. School times were just part of his day. Unlike other teachers he spent time prepping art projects and sourcing supplies from local businesses. It wasn’t glamorous, but very critically important to making sure his students were interested and engaged.

  He had stopped dating because it just wasn’t worth the hassle. In fact, it had been a long time since he even found a woman interesting enough to think about dating again. Cambry wasn’t just interesting. He still couldn’t put a finger on it, but there was something pulling him towards her. Something beyond the physical attraction. He felt like she might need him. She hit all of his likes, every single one of them. He hoped there was something about him that she liked too. If there wasn’t, he’d figure out just what she needed and make sure she got it.

  Hank had been looking her up and down for what felt like five minutes. It probably was closer to thirty seconds, but it made her feel horribly uncomfortable.

  He finally let out a large sigh and reached into his pocket and pulled out a set of keys.

  “You’ll do. Here are the keys; paperwork is on the counter inside. Get it back to me and I don’t mean next month. I wanna see it before you start moving your crap in there. No pets, no loud parties, no parking in anyone else’s spot. Rent is paid on time or before and don’t knock on my door unless something is on fire or flooding. Just leave me a note if you need something fixed. I’ll get around to it.”

  He gave her another up and down and turned around to walk back to the door marked 1.

  “That’s it? I get the apartment?”

  “All yours. Enjoy the luxury of living at Mountain Vista Apartments.”

  Cambry took a glance around. There were no mountain views so she had to wonder about the name.

  The door to the first apartment slammed closed and she controlled the urge to do a little dance or jump up and down. Walking slowly towards the end of the building to number eight, she kept a side eye to the other apartments she was passing. A few had their blinds cracked open as if someone might be watching her. She didn’t blame them. Small multi-housing complexes meant an almost forced community. In larger complexes you could be anonymous. Not these, these you probably heard and smelled your neighbors you were so close.

  Turning the key in the lock, she gave the door a little push. It stuck for a moment like it had recently been painted and the surface was still tacky and drying.

  Pushing it open, she expected to have a moment of disappointment. It wasn’t the seventeenth floor of a modern apartment in New York. It wasn’t eighteen hundred feet of modern eclectic motif, with works of art on the walls and white leather couches normal people would be terrified to use regularly.

  This was a room, a large room, but still just a room. It had a closet, next to that was a small counter with a sink and the tiniest stove and refrigerator she’d ever seen. Then there was a door that led to a bathroom with a shower, toilet, and vanity. Turning around she took in the eggshell colored walls, the beige blinds and beige carpet that at least looked newish. That was the total of her new apartment.

  It was dirt cheap at six hundred dollars a month. She could make that easily working both jobs. There might even be money left over for a case of Top Ramen if she was lucky. Caviar to instant noodles. It might just be the title for her memoirs some day.

  Giving herself another couple of turns around her new home, she turned off the lights and locked up. The blinds in the window of the apartment next to her swung as though someone had just backed away from them. Maybe she’d pick up a ‘meet your neighbors’ box of donuts and try to make a good impression right away.

 
; Getting back into the car, she tucked the lease agreement into her purse and headed towards her second job. She could face anything, even Landon, knowing she was so much closer to being on her own.

  There was a spring in her step when she got to the department store. Landon was perplexed, but since she was doing all of the work he didn’t want to do, he didn’t intrude on her happiness.

  Getting home, she found a note on the counter from her mom that said she’d left some meatloaf in the fridge for her. Bumming food off her parents would now include a visit. Those would have to be scheduled and spaced apart. Cambry would gladly get scurvy to know she had a fridge of her own full of things she liked, and a couch she could sit on and eat without her mother trying to tuck a placemat on her lap.

  Freedom. Not that she was sure what freedom actually meant. Even in New York she felt like she had to be ‘on’ while at home. The apartment couldn’t get messy, the flowers in the vases had to be fresh, and there was never more than coffee, alcohol, and water in the house. They ate every meal out or had it delivered.

  It seemed like such a foreign way to live now.

  Cambry knew that she wasn’t going to be able to go to sleep. She wanted to hunt through the ads online for serviceable furniture. She wasn’t above moving in and sleeping on the floor. But with her small savings, she could afford to get herself at least a bed. She’d buy the mattresses new, which meant the bed had to be cheap. There was also everything else that she’d need. Kitchen items and linens were at the top of the list. Even before a couch, she needed a coffee pot and towels.

  Her plan was to use her discount at the department store to get some of those items. It was the best part of working there. You knew when items had been discounted or returned and marked down. She wasn’t above snatching those for herself. Her nest needed to be feathered and she was going to make a cozy hideaway just for her.

  The only distraction was the handsome school teacher who asked her out, and now she was locked into a date. Never in a million years would she cancel. That was a faux pas she’d never commit. She would just have to pull from her memory what one did on a date. Just having something nice to look at while she ate might be all she got out of it, but she’d take any happiness she could at this point.

  Telling her parents she was moving out was another step. Her mom would tell her it was a terrible idea, and her father would just grunt at her. He loved her, but didn’t verbalize it very often, so she had gotten good at interpreting his sounds. But now she had a place of her own. For a small second she thought about grabbing her bedding and driving back to sleep on the apartment floor. It would be an evening of quiet, no hum of the washing machine and the smell of bleach that her mother used by the gallon.

  The laundry room was in the basement and her mom had no problem starting late night loads. There also wouldn’t be that constant sound of foot traffic from up above. She could also skip the countdown to when the blaring television was turned off as soon as her father watched the sports report. Her parent’s TV only had one volume and she was pretty sure it was ninety-nine out of a hundred.

  Instead, she filled out the paperwork, attached a check, and tucked it into her purse. She’d drop it off before work in the morning then come home, shower away the smell of used oil and sugar, and figure out what one wore to eat ribs with a stranger.

  Chapter 8

  The girls had been consulted, and dark jeans and nice top was the winning decision. Since Cambry only had dressy jeans, that was an easy pick. Standing in front of her mirror she decided that wearing heels was a good idea. It made her look longer and it picked up the color in her jewelry. Which was all costume now, since the rest had been confiscated. Gold bangles on her wrist picked up the soft yellow in her silk blouse with the wide collar that showed her collar bone. It also billowed around her waist and hid the tummy roll that was trying to poke over her jeans.

  She had intended to leave her hair down and in bouncy waves because it felt good and made her feel good, she was sad when it was vetoed by the girls. They said hair and sauce didn’t mix and she had to agree with them. Pulling her hair into a side braid that laid over her shoulder was pretty and casual and would hopefully help her avoid any sauce accidents.

  Hoping she wasn’t overdressed, she got into her car and drove to the the address Evan had texted over. He’d comically added to the end of the address: Evan Brantley, teacher, hunk, guy you are drawn to and can’t resist his charm, solid citizen, and thinks you’re hot. In case you forgot who I was.

  Yeah, like that was going to happen. Her courage had been building with her friends’ constant affirmations. It was something she was immensely grateful for. No matter what negativity she threw out, they had the words to bring her back to feeling good again.

  The only glitch had been a collect call from the prison that she thought about rejecting but then accepted out of guilt. Cambry couldn’t help but think about how you would feel if you were alone, locked up and someone rejected your call. It was stupid, it wasn’t her problem, and he had his own family he could call.

  Still, she picked up and accepted the collect call.

  “Cammy?”

  “Don’t call me that.”

  “Sorry, I just miss you.”

  “What can I do for you?”

  “I just wanted to talk. See how you are doing.”

  “I’m busy. I have to go to work soon.”

  “Wow, you working. I bet you thought you’d never do that again,” he laughed.

  “Miles it wasn’t that I didn’t want to work, I just didn’t need to work. I did graduate from college just like you did, remember.”

  “I know, I know. I’m sorry you have to work.”

  “I’m not. It’s good for me. I have two jobs now and just rented a studio apartment. I’ll be moving in next week.”

  “A studio? Why aren’t you staying with your parents? I can’t believe our friends ditched us like they did.”

  “I can. You lied, cheated, and stole from them. Why would they care if I was living with my parents? They don’t owe me anything and they definitely don’t owe you anything. As far as they’re concerned, I was living off that money like a princess even though I had no idea what was going on. It makes you a crook and me an idiot. I wouldn’t want to be friends with us either.”

  “Babe, it was a misunderstanding. I told you.”

  “Don’t ‘babe’ me. We aren’t married anymore. I don’t even have to take your calls. You knew what you were doing and then you tried to blame me.”

  “That was my lawyer’s idea, I swear. He said it would raise reasonable doubt and might help me. I’d never hurt you, Cammy.”

  “You did hurt me, Miles. You are continuing to hurt me by calling me and reminding me that I made so many blind mistakes with you. I see everything clearly now. I’m working my ass off and making my own life. It’s my life now, Miles, not ours. You broke ours and it can’t be fixed. This is the last call I’m going to accept from you. If you need someone to talk to, I’d suggest you call your family. I’m not that anymore. Now if you’ll excuse me, I have to get ready for my date.”

  “Date? What do you mean….”

  Cambry hung up. She knew it was a petty thing to do, but she was mad at him and wanted him to feel bad. Her phone rang again. The number for the prison line blinked on her screen. She declined the call, and the next one.

  She put her phone on silent and tried to decide why she still felt the need to communicate with him. She had fallen out of love with him slowly and it was taking a while for her brain to catch up with her heart. There was a fondness of the past, but nothing that she could say was currently occupying her feelings. The divorce was final; she needed to finalize her feelings.

  Miles was in jail by his own actions. She was guilty of living blindly, which she wasn’t doing any more. She was paying for his crimes by having to start over in her thirties by living with her parents and scraping money together to buy sheets. That was fine. It would mean from her
e on out, she was a self-made woman. Even if that self-made was heavily discounted.

  Chapter 9

  Standing outside the front door of the restaurant, Cambry almost chickened out. The drive had her replaying the phone call from the prison. Her self-confidence faltered and all of a sudden, she didn’t feel as pretty or as put together as she had felt at home. Not being the kind of person that bailed on someone waiting for her, she stepped towards the door as it swung open towards her.

  Evan was standing there holding the door open for her, a smile on his handsome face.

  “I was giving you a minute to decide if you were coming in or not. Thanks for choosing not to leave me eating alone.”

  “You were watching me?”

  “I was waiting for you, so yes, I saw you. You looked uncertain.”

  Cambry walked up to him and tilted her head back to look up at him. “I was. I was feeling a little insecure.” She wasn’t sure why she admitted that to him. It seemed like he might understand though.

  Evan leaned down and closed the distance between them, placing his lips against hers. Cambry gave a gasp of shock and Evan kissed her a little deeper. His tongue flicked against her lips and she immediately responded back. It was an unconscious gesture to kiss him back, but it felt good.

  He broke the kiss and ran his thumb over her damp lips. “You shouldn’t feel insecure about anything. You are beautiful and sexy as hell. You kept me up thinking very inappropriate thoughts about you. You have nothing to worry about, believe me.”

  Evan grabbed her hand and Cambry followed him into the restaurant in a daze. He’d kissed her and told her he thought sexy things about her. She wasn’t about to admit that she had dreamed about him. She’d kissed a man she barely knew in front of a restaurant. Normally, public displays of affection made her uncomfortable. His kiss was borderline inappropriate, or at least it felt like it. Cambry felt like her body was lit up. A flicker inside a bulb that hadn’t been turned on in a while. Evan Brantley could be just the type to make her burn bright if she let him.