Now that Aidar is with—
Her mouth tightened. In the days since he’d vanished she’d thrown herself into the work and there was plenty of it. The constant activity was the only thing that made his absence bearable but in every quiet moment her chest ached with longing for him.
Embarrassed, angry at him — angry at herself — and hiding it from her brother, she found herself writing messages to send to him of one or another ‘urgent’ matter that would draw him home. But she didn’t even know where he was and she couldn’t bring herself to send the message to Senya to deliver it to him.
What if she sent it and he didn’t come?
What if he did?
When she slept she dreamed of him. On the streets she had looked at every warrior to see if it was he and it never was.
She forced her focus on the datapad. She was Ti’antah of this clan. These people were learning to depend on her. If the Az’anti clan fell, these people fell with it.
Kyndan scoffed. “Why even bother, Kinna? We’re going home, remember?”
She shifted on the cushions, her chest burning at the memory. As if in the meantime everyone could go hungry and the grain be left to rot in the fields. Even if she didn’t need the power to track down dozens of Tellarans and get them all home, even if someday things were set enough for her to leave permanently, this clan needed a leader now.
It was like he didn't get that, from oldest clan member to Nyat’s newborn baby, Kinara, these people were her responsibility. Her decisions made the difference between warm clothing and ample food or starvation.
They believed in her finally, she could see it in her maids’ faces, in her warriors’ eyes. She could address every person on the Az’anti estate by name now. Word of her meeting with the Elders and her attending Rebena had gotten around, they saw she worked for her clan from the moment she opened her eyes till she fell, exhausted, into bed.
And none believed in her more than Bebti. He was constantly underfoot; eager to perform any task she set him to. He followed her everywhere, his dark eyes adoring and in his view at least she could do no wrong.
If the heart counted, Bebti was more Az’anti than she could ever be.
These people needed her and she was going to deliver no matter how Kyndan sneered. When she’d told him she had to host a visit for the Az’leb clan leader or risk offending her, he’d snorted, saying that she had enough warriors to send against them.
Enough warriors! As if these men didn’t have bound mates and children they would leave behind. As if they wouldn’t go to their deaths believing that she would take care of those loved ones if they died.
As if they aren’t even people!
She gave up on the note to Lianna and pulled up the display of accounts from her estates on the datapad. The yentah seemed to be inhaling feed and grain prices were rising like crazy on Az-kye. She rubbed her forehead, thinking it over as she heard Kyndan come in.
Damn it, couldn't the herds eat grasses on the southern lands instead to free up some of that grain?
She checked another set of figures. “Did you enjoy the city?” she asked absently.
“Well enough.”
Her head came up. “Aidar.”
She simply looked at him, feeling her heart thump erratically in her chest.
Gods, had he always been so beautiful?
“What . . . what are you doing here?” she asked faintly.
Aidar regarded her with a warrior’s impassivity. “I am come home.”
“You’ve come home. Just like that?” Her eyes narrowed. “It’s been five days without so much as a word from you! Mind telling me where the hell you’ve been?”
He glanced at the glow of lights visible through the doors of the balcony. “In the lower city. Then at Cenna’s house.”
Her nostrils flared. Like I’m going to believe that. Or anything you say.
“Well, you can go back to wherever you were!” She stood. “‘Cause you sure as hell aren’t staying here!”
“This is the Az’anti clanhouse. You cannot forbid me my home.”
“Leave now or I’ll call my guards!”
“I am your bound mate, Cy’atta. They will obey me.”
“They will not!” But he was right. As Az’anti lord and her protector Aidar had final say on the warriors’ actions. If she summoned them in the end they’d obey him.
“The day has been long, Cy’atta,” he said, offering her his hand. “I am tired.”
She stepped back quickly. “Stay away from me!”
He dropped his hand. “As it pleases you.”
He turned away, pulling at the clasps of his clothing.
“What do you think you’re doing?” she demanded.
“I am going to bed.”
He undressed and stretched. He caught her looking at him and his dark eyes warmed. When Kinara noticed his arousal she jerked her gaze away.
“Come here,” his husky tone ran through her like a current.
“Oh, I don’t think so!” She turned her back on him very aware of his footsteps as he crossed the room to stand behind her.
He touched her hair. “I want you,” he said softly.
Her heart thudded. “I don’t care what you want.”
She felt the heat of his body behind her.
His breath against her ear sent heat racing between her legs. “I have been too long without you.”
But you haven’t been lonely! “Leave me alone."
She could feel herself getting lightheaded. She closed her eyes knowing at the next touch she would turn to him.
She heard the soft sound of the bedcovers shifting and, startled, she turned. He settled beneath the blankets with a sigh.
“What the hell are you doing?” she demanded.
“If you do not wish to join then I am going to sleep.”
“You’re just . . . going to sleep?”
He didn’t even open his eyes. “Yes.”
Gave up pretty easily, didn't you? Senya must have been some— Kinara gritted her teeth. “And where am I supposed to sleep?”
He didn’t answer, his breathing deep and even. Kinara stood with her arms folded across her chest.
He has no right to do this! He has no right to come from her bed and just get into mine!
When Kyndan returned, and she’d tell him how this Az-kye treated her then –
She stopped short. Then what? Have Kyndan try to throw the Az'anti lord out of his own bed? Have Aidar cut her brother to pieces?
She snatched up the datapad again. She couldn’t complain to Kyndan. It would just make it worse.
Why did he even come back? Did Senya leave the city? Did they have a fight?
Her grip tightened on the datapad. And what about tonight? She couldn’t sleep beside him, and if she slept in another room or on one of the couches here the women might gossip. Damage her status as Lady of the Az’anti and she couldn’t hope to gather her people and get them all to freedom.
The Sah and Az’leb clan leaders were coming in the morning and the Sah clan owned six of Kyndan's crew. She had to test her chances of joining the Council for Trade and manage to buy Kyndan's people from the Sah Ti’antah all in one meeting.
Damn it, I can’t deal with Aidar too!
She took her datapad to the dining table. She had a ton of work to get through.
Why doesn’t he just admit where he’d been? Or can’t he stop lying long enough?
She tapped the edge of the table fuming. I should just wake him up. The least he could do is sleep in another room.
Two hours of seething and she finally gave up trying to work. She changed into a nightdress in the bathing room then extinguished the lights.
He didn’t even stir when she got into bed.
Her head pounded and lying stiffly beside Aidar wasn’t helping. The warmth of his body and the scent of him were distracting. He was already asleep, exhausted by his five-day romp with Senya and Kinara scowled, trying to find a comfortable position
as far away from him as possible.
The arms around her tightened briefly and Kinara snuggled closer. She made a soft sound of contentment, running her hand over warm skin.
Her eyes flew open. “Get off me!”
“I am not on you,” Aidar said. “You are on me.”
She scowled. She was indeed on him, her leg thrown over his.
“It was cold last night,” she grumbled starting to disentangle from him.
He didn’t even try to keep her against him. His hold slackened instantly and she slipped away easily.
“Hmm,” he murmured rubbing his eyes. “I slept overlong. I must dress and go.”
Kinara gritted her teeth. “Well, as little as I like to inconvenience you, Banne is paying a call today and I need you here.”
He paused then sighed. “I will go after her call.”
He got out of bed and stretched then padded off to the bathing chamber.
Damn him.
She followed him. He was already in the pool, dunking his head under the water.
“I hope you don’t mind,” she said. “I have to bathe too and I can’t wait all morning.”
He barely glanced at her. Kinara got into the water and half-turned from him as she bathed. It was impossible to ignore him. She washed, holding herself stiffly in case he got any ideas.
She glanced at him but he ignored her completely. Had he shared a bath with Senya? Kinara could feel her jaw clenching. What exactly had happened in Senya’s bath that he noticed her no more now than if she were a bench?
She washed and rinsed her hair then stretched her arms back for a moment, letting the water drive her breasts higher. Then she reached for the soap, sliding the lather over her breasts.
She looked at him beneath her lashes to find him cleaning his fingernails. She turned and stood on one of the steps to lather her back, letting the soap bubbles slide over her buttocks. She reached for a sponge and glanced at him.
He was frowning as he examined his thumbnail. She dipped beneath the water and rinsed. She paused on the step, the water to her knee.
He didn’t even look up.
She grabbed a towel to dry off then pulled her robe on. “Just how long do you intend to stay there? I can hear the women coming in, and I have to get ready.”
“I need nothing from you,” he said, turning away.
Her eyes narrowed.
“Laric!” she barked as she came into the bedroom.
The maid jumped and dropped the gown she was holding.
“Get me a gown fit for greeting the clan leaders of the Az’leb and the Sah. Make sure whatever you choose has a bright color and bring me the zahah jewels.” She tossed a glance at Metha. “Go down and tell the kitchen to have the tea and sweets ready. A lot of sweets and make sure there is plenty of that bakauri candy I got yesterday then go to the garden and see to it that everything’s ready.”
The women froze, their eyes going to the bathing chamber door as Aidar strolled out, wrapped in a robe, rubbing at his hair with a towel.
“Don’t stand around like yentath at gathering time!” Kinara snapped. “Those clan leaders’ll be here soon, so move it!”
The women scattered. She stood stiffly as the women dressed her. Laric was clucking over her wet hair; there would hardly be time to get it dry and arranged. The more elaborate the hairstyle, the more important the guest, and Kinara warned her not to overdo it. She didn’t want these clan leaders thinking that they were too important to the Az’anti.
Laric was twisting her hair into a suitable style when Kyndan came in. In the past days the women had become used to his inviting himself into Kinara’s rooms.
“Where’s Bebti?” Kinara asked. She hadn’t seen the boy since yesterday. He was usually already in her room by this time of the morning, holding a plate of pastries for her to choose from, offering to fan her and generally getting in the way.
Kyndan shrugged. “Probably begging Nyat for a sword lesson or strutting around inspecting the guards. I should teach him darshball, the kid has enough energy to make up a whole team.” He looked her over and raised an eyebrow. “What are you all dressed up for? Having an audience with the Empress?”
“Don’t be ridiculous,” she said impatiently. “If I were going to see the Empress I’d be wearing all black.”
“Right, sorry,” he said, taking a piece of fruit and biting into it. “I guess I’m not up on Az-kye fashions. What are you up to today, Kinna? Kowtowing to another Az-kye High Lady?”
“The Az-kye don’t have High Ladies. They have clan Ti’antahs and yes, two are visiting me today.”
“Sounds like fun.” Kyndan sat on a nearby couch. “I don’t even know why you bother with this nonsense.”
Kinara checked her hair in the mirror that Laric held up. “It’s not fun, it’s work. And the only reason you aren’t scrubbing floors somewhere is because I’m a clan leader.”
“Oh, now I suppose you’re going to tell me you really like being a – ” Kyndan jumped to his feet. “What’s he doing here?!”
Dressed now, Aidar returned her brother’s glare with an Az-kye warrior’s impassivity.
She was keenly aware of the women looking between them.
“He’s lord of the Az’anti,” Kinara mumbled. “This is his house.”
“You’re not letting him stay here?”
As if she had a starblasted choice! “Where he stays is none of your business.”
“None of my business? He destroyed our ships, he imprisoned our people, and he sold me into slavery!” Kyndan raged. “And you think it’s none of my business that my sister is playing his whore?”
Kinara was on her feet and a handbreadth from him in an instant.
“Don’t ever speak to me that way again! Never, do you understand? Or I’ll have you outside picking berries from sunrise to midnight.”
Kyndan’s lip curled. “I never thought I’d see the day when you’d be like them. Nothing more than another filthy Az-kye.”
“These people depend on me, Kyndan! I’m their clan leader; do you know what that means? It means I’m responsible for them. I have to take care of their needs.”
“What you mean is you have to take care of his needs!” Kyndan shouted with a wave at Aidar.
“He could have killed you or me or any of our people but he didn’t. And he figured out how to get you away from Unata. I couldn’t have done it! If he hadn’t thought quickly you would still be Unata’s slave.”
“Instead of yours? Maybe you want me to pick some berries now?”
“No, what I want is you out of my sight! Now, get out!”
“You order, I obey,” Kyndan spat.
He slammed the heavy door behind him.
Kinara was shaking. The women’s eyes were lowered, acting as if they hadn’t seen their lady shouted at by a slave. As if they hadn’t seen that slave walk away without punishment.
Aidar’s face was turned toward the open balcony doors, his gaze kept pointedly on the city outside.
“Come on, let’s finish up,” she muttered to the women. “Those clan leaders will be here soon.”
The maids put the final touches on her clothing, smoothed her hair and applied her lip color.
Kinara took a quick glance in the mirror and nodded to Laric to hand over her jaha feather fan.
The door banged open just as Kinara turned and Bebti burst into the room.
“Lady! Have you need of me? I slept overlo—oof!” The boy broke off as Aidar caught him by the scuff of the neck.
“Hey,” Kinara cried. “Let him go!”
Aidar stared at her as Bebti struggled against his hold, the child howling blistering curses. “Let him –?”
“Go!” Kinara glared. “Now!”
The instant Aidar slackened his grip the boy launched himself toward her and threw his arms around her waist.
Kinara put her arm around him, cradling his head with her hand.
“It’s all right,” she soothed as the child turned
his head to stare at Aidar. “He’s not going to hurt you.”
“Who is this boy?” Aidar demanded.
Kinara shifted her iridescent fan to her other hand to keep it from being crushed. “This is Bebti.”
Aidar glanced at Laric who lifted her eyebrows and gave him a long-suffering look, then at Bebti and back at her. “Cy’atta, whose child is this?”
“Well,” Kinara began then cleared her throat. “I guess you could say he’s mine.”
Aidar blinked. “Your—? I do not — Where did he come from?”
“I was sitting outside the Temple of Lashima and I found . . . Well, actually he found me. And then I sort of, uh, adopted him and brought him home.”
Aidar’s face was naked with astonishment. “You did what?”
“I adopted him.” She shifted her weight. “Kind of. I mean not officially or anything but his parents are— Bebti,” she said with a glance down at the boy. “This is your lord, Aidar of the Az’anti.”
Aidar was staring at the boy as if he were a dava-stink bug that had crawled into the house.
For his part Bebti was looking up wide-eyed at Aidar as if the warrior god Ren’thar had just appeared in the flesh in front of him.
“When—?” Aidar began, his voice strangled. “When did you do such, my mate?”
Kinara’s eyes narrowed. “While you were away.”
“I am to be one of your warriors, my lord!” Bebti cried. “My lady promised so!”
Aidar recoiled. “You promised to make this street child—”
“I think he will make a fine warrior someday,” Kinara interrupted, stroking the child’s hair.
Aidar swiped his hand over his eyes.
Kinara met him glare for glare.
Finally Aidar blew his breath out and threw a glower at Bebti. “Let go your lady this instant and go you to the boys’ quarters!”
“Oh, no way!” Kinara protested, holding the child fast. “He’s stays with me!”
Aidar’s nostrils flared. “No, he shall not!”
Kinara hardened her jaw. “I think you’re forgetting who is Ti’antah here.”
“How many summers are you?” Aidar snapped at the child.
“E-eight, my lord.”
Aidar raised his eyes triumphantly as if this explained everything.
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