Since Forever Ago

by Olivia Besse

  “No! Or... maybe! I don’t know!” Riley blurted out. “But what Max did was fucked up! And all I know right now is that I don’t care if he cares!”

  “Sounds like you care to me,” Liz quipped in a singsong voice.

  “So much caring going on...” Audrey quietly muttered under her breath.

  “Whatever!” Riley spat out. “I don’t give a fuck! I literally have no fucks left to give!”

  “So you’re saying that you honestly don’t give a fuck about Max?” Liz asked as she shot Riley a questioning stare.

  “I... I’m just confused!”

  “I know that this is the last thing you want to hear right now, but I’m just going to go ahead and say it. Whatever you had going on with Max seemed like the real deal,” Liz said with a shrug. “I never thought that I’d see Fletcher settle down, but watching the two of you seemed... I don’t know, right. It just seems like he gets you.”

  “That’s just because he’s my friend,” Riley insisted.

  At this, Audrey let out a wistful sigh. “Your friend who brings you soup you’re your sick! And don’t even get me started on the breakfast in bed!” she cooed out. “Everyone always says that you should fall in love with your best friend, you know.”

  “My best friend who encouraged my boyfriend of six years to cheat on me?”

  “You and I both know that there has to be more to that story than whatever you heard,” Liz pointed out in a bored tone. “I’m pretty sure that Max didn’t just go up to Noah and tell him to go bang an army of sluts.”

  “But—”

  “Riley. You can’t blame Noah’s actions on Max.”

  “I guess...”

  “So don’t overreact and jump to conclusions,” Liz said resolutely. “This isn’t some shitty teen romance novel, for fuck’s sake.”

  “You’re right,” Riley admitted, her cheeks turning pink as she thought back on how dramatic her reaction had been. “Maybe I should at least hear him out.”

  Audrey craned her neck in the direction of the door before turning back to Riley with a frown. “Well, it might be too late for that,” she mused. “I think he left.”

  Shooting Riley a reassuring smile, Liz got up from her seat and made her way to the entryway, opening the door with a flourish to find nothing but an empty doorstep.

  “What the hell?” Liz muttered in confusion once she had noticed something swaying out of the corner of her eye. “There’s a Taco Bell bag hanging from the doorknob.”

  “Ew,” Audrey added with a grimace. “That is definitely not like the movies.”

  As Liz dropped the flimsy plastic bag filled with junk food onto the table, a tiny smile crept onto Riley’s face. Liz was right—Max understood her in ways that no other guy, including Noah, ever could. Whenever Noah had fucked up, he would shower her with shit that she couldn’t have cared less about, like stuffed animals and flowers. But Max? He obviously knew the way to her heart, and that road was paved with refried beans and salsa.

  “I’m going to talk to him,” Riley told them, nodding her head in determination.

  “Good girl,” Liz said with a proud smile.

  “Really?” Audrey squeaked out in confusion. “That changed your mind? Taco Bell?”

  “Should I text him? Call him?”

  “This is more of a face-to-face conversation kind of situation, don’t you think?” Liz suggested.

  “I guess so,” Riley groaned, dreading the idea of discussing the matter with him in person.

  “So, what are you doing?” Liz asked, an expectant look on her face. “Go on and get the fuck out of here.”

  I can’t believe I’m actually here, Riley silently lamented once she had finally made her way over to his place, staring up at the intimidating frat house in trepidation. Why couldn’t you have just opened the fucking door, Benson? she chastised herself, her heart pounding in her chest as she pushed her car door open and heard the bottom of her shoe scrape against the gravelly road. You could’ve saved yourself a trip to campus and a whole lot of pride, I can tell you that.

  The faint sound of obnoxious electronic music could be heard from where she stood on the sidewalk, and she could see groups of boys and girls milling about through the house’s large, dirty windows. Do these people just party every single day? she couldn’t help but wonder as she made her way to the front door.

  Okay, deep breaths. Now, start with... Wait a fucking minute, what are you going to say? You’re such an idiot; you came all the way here without a game plan? What if he’s not even here? What are you going to do then? Are you just going to wing it?

  Yes, let’s just wing it, she decided as she firmly knocked on the heavy wooden door. Just go with the flow and— No! That’s a terrible idea. You’re obviously both physically and mentally incapable of “winging” it. Quick, turn around and run back to the car before—

  “Hey. Long time, no see,” Jeremy said with a grin as he answered the door and leaned against the doorway. “Here to see me?”

  “Ha... hey,” Riley replied as breezily as she could, trying her best not to vomit all over herself at his cocky greeting. What the hell had she even seen in him? He wasn’t even that cute. “I’m actually here to see Max.”

  “Oh yea,” Jeremy muttered, a hint of a disappointment clouding his face. He wasn’t used to being rejected by members of the opposite sex, and was more than a little peeved by what was happening at the moment. “Anyway, sorry to tell you, but he’s busy right now.”

  “Busy?”

  “I saw him go upstairs a few minutes ago,” Jeremy told her, a mischievous glint in his eye. If he wasn’t going to get any action with this Riley chick, he didn’t see the harm in having some fun with the situation. “With April.”

  “Oh,” Riley said in response, unable to come up with any other words. “I see.”

  What the fuck? With April? she thought to herself as she felt the blood drain from her face, her throat tightening in anger and mortification. Was Max actually upstairs with that obnoxious girl? He had made it seem like he couldn’t even stand the sound of her voice, but now he was up in his room with that ditz? Had he not been standing on her doorstep, practically begging her for forgiveness not even half an hour earlier?

  Was all of it just an act? Riley couldn’t help but wonder. Did he ever even like me? Was this all just some game to him?

  She knew very well that Max was as charming as they come, but she had assumed that things were different when it came to their relationship. Was she just another girl to him, just another name on his long list of casual conquests? Was Max just a run-of-the-mill commitment-phobe who was looking for a good time?

  Maybe she had been wrong. Maybe Max wasn’t any different from all of the other guys. Maybe Max was just another asshole.

  And maybe she was just living out the plotline of a shitty teen romance novel.

  “You can go and take a look for yourself if you want,” Jeremy offered, a tiny smirk on his lips. “Or you’re always welcome to come and hang out with me.”

  “No,” Riley replied with a shake of her head, her brain suddenly feeling numb. “No, I think I’m just going to get going.”

  “Suit yourself,” Jeremy called out, shrugging his shoulders in indifference before letting the door swing shut. “See ya.”

  “Who was that?” Max asked as he bounded down the stairs, April trailing after him like a sick little puppy.

  “Just some Lambdas trying to crash,” Jeremy lied with a dismissive wave of his hand. “Told them to get lost. No big.”

  Max nodded absentmindedly as he began making his way over to the kitchen, trying his best not to spin around and yell at April to back off. I need a fucking drink, he thought to himself miserably, pushing past a couple of his friends to get to the fridge. A drink, a blunt and a time machine.

  “So, I promise that I’ll totally get these back to you, like, right after my test,” April cooed from over his shoulder, waving around the photocopies of the previous year’s P
sychology exams that he had procured for her from the filing cabinet full of old midterms and finals upstairs. “Thank you so much for getting them for me. You’re, like, the sweetest.”

  Max turned around to face her, a bored expression on his face. “Whatever.”

  “I’m not going to need them until we go to the library for study hours anyway,” she purred to him, placing a light hand on his arm as she batted her eyelashes seductively. “I have time to, like, hang out right now if you want.”

  “I’m good,” Max flatly replied, gently pushing past her so that he could escape to his room for a little peace and quiet.

  Unfortunately, peace and quiet seemed to be the last things that he needed at the moment, as the eerily silent environment in his room only caused him to think back on everything that had happened earlier that evening. Staring off into space, he turned his phone around in his hands, mustering up all of the self-control within him to keep his fingers from tapping out a flurry of apologetic paragraphs with which to bombard her text inbox.

  Give her some space, he advised himself, sighing miserably as he leaned back in his chair. You’re just going to piss her off if you keep bothering her right now. She doesn’t want to hear it. And can you even blame her?

  You’re scum, Fletcher, he groaned in disgust, shutting his eyes tightly and recalling the image of her crestfallen face. You’re garbage. You’re the worst.

  The absolute worst of the worst.

  Twenty-eight

  “Ugh, mandatory study hours are the worst. I would totally kill for a skinny peppermint mocha right now.”

  And I would totally kill to be allowed to leave right now, Max thought to himself as he sullenly glared over in April’s direction. Why the hell does she have to sit right here? Can’t she go sit at the other table?

  Max let out a deep sigh as the faint sound of Taylor Swift songs blaring from April’s headphones wafted into one ear as a loud crunching noise entered the other.

  “Dude!” he blurted out as he abruptly turned his head in annoyance.

  Evan stared back at him with a blank expression, a potato chip held between his fingers in mid-air as he asked, “What?”

  “Do you really have to eat those right now?”

  “I’m chewing as slowly as I can, bro.”

  “That just prolongs the noise, asshole,” Max groaned out.

  Evan raised an eyebrow at him in curiosity. “What’s with the pissy fit?”

  “I’m just in a bad mood,” Max sighed out. “Sorry.”

  “You’re always in a bad mood,” April teased, pouting at him flirtatiously.

  “Whenever you’re around, duh,” Evan muttered to her with a laugh.

  “Ugh, Evan, you’re so annoying,” April drawled out, throwing a balled up gum wrapper in his direction.

  Only two hours left, Max reminded himself, staring intently at the time displayed on the corner of his screen until the numbers blurred together. Two more hours and you’re free.

  “So, Max, can you, like, help me on my paper?” April asked in a syrupy voice as she leaned closer to him. “I bet you’re super good at writing.”

  “I’m a computer science major,” he flatly reminded her.

  “So you must be, like, really good at typing,” April gushed before letting out a high-pitched giggle.

  “You gotta be fucking kidding me,” Evan muttered under his breath, shaking his head slightly in disbelief.

  This chick is so clueless, Max couldn’t help but think to himself as he stared back at April with a blank expression on his face. How the hell did I even carry on conversations with her for three entire months?

  He, like many of his male brethren, had always placed a lot of value on a girl’s appearance when hunting for fresh meat. April was undeniably one of the hottest girls on campus, with long, flippy auburn hair and legs that went on for days. Her obvious hotness apparently made up for how batshit insane she was, as many of his frat brothers couldn’t fathom why Max was so resistant to her very forward advances. “I’d hit that for days,” one of his friends had mumbled in awe when she had arrived to the library in what appeared to be the tiniest denim shorts created in the history of mankind. “No, fuck days. For eternity.”

  But the more words that Max had exchanged with the flighty girl, the more disenchanted he had become. He didn’t want some head-turning moron who did nothing much other than talk about herself or spread gossip about her friends—he wanted a girl whose outer beauty matched that of her personality.

  A girl who would laze around with him on the couch, cracking jokes and talking about nonsense for hours. A girl who would feast on junk food with him without constantly moaning about her low carbohydrate diet or her 6 AM spinning class. A girl who was witty and funny and smart. A girl who understood exactly what he meant without him having to say a word. Simply put, he wanted a girl like Riley.

  At that moment, April’s phone began violently vibrating across the tabletop, causing her to let out a tiny squeal before glancing at the screen and answering it with a hushed giggle. “Oh my God, Jess, I’m already at the library! You’re, like, sooo late. Yea, I’m, like, totally studying. Shut up, are you? Ooh, can I get a skinny mocha? No, wait! A skinny vanilla latte. Yea. Okay! Love you, betch.”

  How the hell was I even attracted to her for that long? Max pondered silently as he tried his best not to roll his eyes when April smiled prettily at him. I’m surprised I made it even a week without gouging my eardrums out.

  Max attempted to focus on the half-finished project glaring back at him from his screen, trying to drown out the noise of all of the procrastination that was going on around him. Sam was completely absorbed in the episode of Game of Thrones unfolding on his laptop screen, while April and her equally scatterbrained friend, Kara, were deep into their discussion of why some guy named Trent was “such an asshole.” Evan had abandoned his bag of chips for an equally crunchy apple, noshing away as he watched April and Kara’s philosophical conversation play out before him with a disinterested expression on his face.

  “Dude!” Max cried out at him once again, shooting him another annoyed glare.

  “Go change your tampon or something, bro,” Evan said as he let out a snort of laughter. “Why are you in such a bad mood anyway?”

  “Riley’s still avoiding me,” Max replied, lowering his voice so April couldn’t hear them. “I tried to give her some space before I finally caved, but now she’s ignoring my calls, my texts, my gchats. This is the longest we’ve ever gone without speaking to each other. I don’t even know if she’ll ever talk to me again!.”

  Evan rolled his eyes at the mention of Riley’s name, which had become something of an hourly ritual as of late. “Why’s she so pissed anyway? That was Noah’s fault, not yours.”

  “I don’t know!” Max hissed back. “You tell me!”

  “Let’s ask them,” Evan suggested, gesturing towards April and Kara, who were both giggling like lip gloss-ed hyenas. “I bet they’d know.”

  “What? How would they know anything? They’re nothing like Riley!”

  “Bro, every single girl is the exact same person, just with different hair,” Evan insisted, rolling his highlighter in April’s direction. “It’s like they were all spawned from one mother spore.”

  “Evan—”

  “Ugh, even your writing utensils can’t wait to get away from you,” April remarked as she pushed the highlighter back towards its owner. “What do you want?”

  “I’m having girl problems,” Evan began, a tiny smile on his lips as he glanced over at Max’s peeved face. “I thought maybe you two could help me try to figure them out.”

  “What did you go and do now?” April asked as she raised an eyebrow at him.

  “So Evan has this best friend from way back when he was a little kid,” Max blurted out, causing Evan to shoot him a quizzical frown. “She’s basically his best friend.”

  “Um, no,” Kara firmly stated. “Boys and girls can’t be just friends.”
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  “Says who?”

  “It’s, like, common knowledge,” April drawled out. “God, don’t you two know anything?”

  “Whatever,” Max muttered. “Anyway, so this girl was dating Evan’s other friend for the longest time, when—”

  “So she was a lesbian,” Kara deduced, nodding slightly for him to continue on.

  “No, the other friend was a guy.”

  “Oh, I just assumed that, since you thought that girls and guys could be friends, that Evan’s other friend was also a girl—”

  “Dude, that would’ve been awesome,” Evan sighed out wistfully.

  “Can we just get back to the story?” Max grumbled, resisting the urge to roll his eyes. Why did all girls seem to possess attention spans that rivaled those of newborn squirrels? Maybe Evan was right—maybe they were all spawned from the same attention deficient mold. “So, as I was saying, his best female friend was dating one of his best male friends, when that male friend told Evan that he had this overwhelming urge to cheat on her.”

  “Ugh, why do all guys have to be such assholes?” Kara groaned out before exchanging a knowing look with April. “That is such a typical move. It’s just like how Trent—”

  “Back to the story,” Max repeated through gritted teeth as Evan stifled a laugh. “So that male friend asked Evan what he should do. Now, Evan here never told this to anyone, but he really, really, really liked that girl. Ever since they were little.”

  “You got it wrong, bro,” Evan began, smirking at Max in amusement. “I didn’t like her. I loved her.”

  “Oh my God, that is, like, so cute,” April gushed, her lips forming into a small pout. “Or, it would’ve been really cute if it was anyone other than Evan, I mean.”

  “Yea, whatever,” Max mumbled as he shot Evan an annoyed glare. “So, then, Evan did something that he shouldn’t have done. But he only did it because of his feelings, so it’s not like he’s a terrible person or anything.”

  “What did you do?” Kara asked, staring at Evan with widened eyes.

  “I told him he should cheat on her,” Evan simply replied, at which Kara and April let out disgusted scoffs of disapproval. “And then he did. A lot.”