If I Fall..._Will You Remember Me?

by Jennifer Christy

  Quabin clenched her fists and rubbed her thumb over the knuckles deep in thought. She knew Julia would feel the shockwave of betrayal soon enough and that anguish would open her up further for what Quabin had planned.

  Chapter 19

  Matthew paced the pristine whiteness of the floor of his cell. Back and forth. Back and forth. His skin was pale and mottled like a disease had taken root in him. How much longer did Yehala intend to keep him here? Already his wings were wilting, his frame shriveling like a raisin. Everything he had worked for was being taken away from him. Everything! Quabin would be furious. Why hadn’t she sent more help?

  Matthew strode furiously through a ray of golden sunlight from that streamed in through a window across the hall and in to his cell. He stopped suddenly and turned back to look at the stream of light. He had felt something when he passed through the light, but it was only briefly. He stretched out his hand to the light. Something stirred inside him. It felt like something that he hadn’t felt in a while. A memory tickled the back of his mind. Matthew passed his hand back and forth through the light stream, seeing the motes swirl in the air, the light warm and pure.

  As his hand passed through it, the flesh changed from mottled gray and white, to a healthy pinkish tone and he saw his own human shaped hand begin to emerge and the memory became stronger, and the memory took him back to when he was a child, hiding in the forest, fascinated by a beam of light that shot through a canopy of leaves overhead. He remembered the way the light sparkled and the insects that fluttered through it, their wings glinting rainbows of color and light. The motes and particulates floating around like tiny fairies, creatures of light and beauty.

  “Matthew!” he remembered the sound of his name uttered as a menacing growl. He looked up as a large figure stepped forward and blocked the light. A hand clamped down on the back of his neck and yanked him up. “Get back home you lazy scruff or I’ll beat you senseless!” he remembered the voice all too well. He scrambled to his feet, fear making his heart race as he took off down the lane, glancing over his shoulder to see his older brother, Nathan laughing at him.

  The memory inflamed his anger. Matthew growled and stood upright, clenching his fist, willing the dark hard crust of his skin to return. He remembered the unjustness of it all. The control and how helpless he felt as a child. Not this time. This time he was the powerful one. This time he made his own decisions, and he had the power. He held up his hand, the once human flesh that had temporarily appeared was now encased in the hard protective granite like shell of his demon body. Nobody was going to hurt him again. Ever!

  Chapter 20

  Julia had been chopping onions in preparation for tomorrow’s breakfast quiche when her thoughts turned suddenly to Nathan. A deep pang erupted inside her heart and tears sprang to her eyes. Something isn’t right, she thought. She felt like her heart was being crushed. She searched her feelings, trying to find the source. Nathan came instantly to her mind. Something has happened to Nathan, she thought. She felt distraught and unsettled. Was he hurt?

  She set down her knife and grabbed a napkin to wipe at her tears when Liu came into the kitchen bearing a fistful of mail. She looked at Julia and went to her, wrapping her arms about her.

  Julia tried to laugh as she wiped her nose. “I’m okay. Silly onions,” she said, but the pain was intense and she let out a sob as she doubled over. “I don’t know what is wrong with me,” she cried. Liu pulled back, but kept her hands on Julia’s arms as if to steady her as she led her to the couch in the front room. Julia slumped into it and began to weep. Liu sat next to her and rubbed her back and waited until not another tear would come and Julia was able to regain her composure.

  “I don’t know where that came from…” she began to say.

  Concerned etched in her features, Liu, shook her head as she spoke. “Your mind doesn’t know, but your heart does, Julia. Listen to your heart. Someone has hurt your heart. Someone very close to you. Trust it.”

  Julia knew this had something to do with Nathan, but how could Nathan hurt her heart? It didn’t make sense. Julia shook her head. “No, I think the onions just triggered it and all the stress I’ve been through the last year, it’s finally catching up with me,” she reasoned. Liu gave her a flat look, but said nothing.

  “I need to finish preparations for tomorrow,” Julia said as she stood. Liu stood as well, giving Julia a deep look of sadness.

  “Come, we both work,” the older woman said. “Get it done faster and then you go for a drive and ask your heart why you are so sad.” Liu promptly headed for the kitchen. Julia closed her eyes and put her hand on her heart. She had no way of contacting Nathan and she prayed he was alright.

  Chapter 21

  Julia was just finishing up the dishes from Breakfast and going over in her mind all the things she had to do to straighten and clean rooms when she felt that familiar buzz in the air when an Angel was about to appear. She was expecting to see Nathan, but instead Liu appeared.

  “Liu,” Julia said in surprise, having never seen Liu materialize like that before. Liu looked frantic and disheveled.

  “You have to go today,” she told Julia in a very firm voice. “You absolutely cannot tell me no!”

  “Where?” Julia asked, startled.

  “To Hawai’i for safety. The Parker Ranch was attacked. This place is next if you don’t’ leave - NOW!” Liu nearly shrieked.

  “Attacked?” Julia nearly stammered.

  Liu looked at her sharply. “This place is next. If you want to save your B&B, leave now!”

  “But what about Meagan and the boys?” Julia started to back away.

  “Too late,” Liu said sternly, “You go now.” Julia didn’t hesitate. She turned and dashed out the back door, snatching her car keys as she went.

  Julia slammed on the brakes as she pulled into the gravel driveway of the Parker Ranch house. She had seen the black smoke raising above the tree lines as soon as she got in her car at the Bed and Breakfast.

  She jumped out of her car, screaming for Meagan as she bolted headlong toward the house. The front door was shattered, a huge gaping hole in the roof, black smoke billowing.

  “No, no, no, no,” she said over and over, thinking of the children and praying fervently that everyone made it out. Perhaps they were out in the back? She altered her path and ran around to the side and into the backyard.

  She came to a stumbling stop, hardly able to grasp the damage inflicted upon the beautiful home. The whole backside was blasted out. Fire raged in the kitchen, the Livingroom a blackened mess. Julia looked at the couch where she had last seen Meagan reposing – ablaze.

  Covering her mouth and nose with the front of her blouse against the smoke, she headed inside, and made her way to the stairs.

  “Meagan!” She called. “Roy!”

  Nothing but the raging fire answered, the rush of flames and wind all around her.

  “What in the hell happened?” she said in utter shock and disbelief.

  “Exactly,” said a voice that seemed to boom around her.

  Julia spun around and saw a woman she had never seen before, standing untouched in the inferno raging in the kitchen.

  “Did you do this?” Julia demanded. The woman had long white hair and eerie black on black eyes. She made no answer.

  “Who are you?” Julia insisted, feeling anger and disgust filling her core.

  “My name isn’t important, but my god wants to talk to you. Come with me?” She held out her hand.

  “Who? Quabin?” Julia said. The she demon closed her eyes and then opened them slowly. They sparked with red anger.

  “Do not use that name so disrespectfully.”

  “You tell Quabin,” Julia spat, “if she hurt my friends, I will hunt her down myself and make sure she pays!”

  The white haired demon’s blood red lips curled in a sneer. “A mere Nephilim threatens the greatest god that ever walked the earth?”

  “A false god,” Julia retorted.

>   “Julia!” Nathan shouted from somewhere in the chaos. She saw him briefly as he burst through the smoke and ash – flying straight for her. He was shirtless and dressed only in a pair of loose sweatpants. His powerful frame slammed into her as his arms wrapped tightly about her. They hurtled through the air – moving hard and fast away from the Parker Ranch.

  “No Nathan,” Julia managed to scream. “Meagan and the boys!”

  “They’re gone!” Nathan yelled back. She could feel his body trembling as she twisted around to get a better grip around his torso. They sped through the air at speeds she had never experienced outside an airplane. She had hard time breathing for the force on her body. “Nathan, please,” she gasped. “I can’t breathe!”

  Nathan slowed down and the next thing she knew they were landing on a courtyard, surrounded by pillars of beautifully carved marble supporting rooms above. Low white buildings surrounded them and the blue sky arched over them. He let her go and still holding her hand to steady her, Julia found herself dizzy and disoriented.

  “Where are we?” Julia looked around.

  “Enosha,” Nathan said shortly and taking her hand, headed towards an arched doorway.

  “Why are you half dressed?” She asked as he nearly pulled her along. Admiring his lean physique, his tight abs and muscled arms – she couldn’t help herself. He looked askance at her; as if ashamed he was half clothed. Julia felt something was oddly different about him. Somehow he was less than what she had remembered feeling about him. What had he been doing at the ranch dressed like that? He had told her would be gone for a few weeks. He let go of her hand as he hurried down open air passageways toward a large building.

  “What’s going on? What happened to the Parker ranch?” she called after him, picking up her pace to catch up to him.

  “It was attacked,” was all that he would say. “Come on, we need to get help.” He turned down a passageway that opened up to a neat boulevard, lined with glimmering white stone faced buildings.

  “Where are we exactly?” Julia asked, gawking at the neat and clean lines of what she assumed was a city. Large statured men and women in assorted white or light colored clothing passed them by, or stood in groups talking. For as much as she gawked at the citizens of this mysterious city in the clouds, she also got curious looks from them.

  Nathan slowed his pace and took her hand. “You’re in the city of Enosha.”

  “Enosha? Is that another word for heaven?”

  “Never mind, I’ll explain later. I’ve got to find Yehala and get help. Quabin has gone too far.”

  “Does Quabin have them? Is Meagan and the boys okay? Please tell me they are okay! please.”

  “I don’t know where they are,” he said angrily.

  “How did this happen? I thought the Ranch was safe, protected!”

  “It’s my fault,” his voice broke. “I was tricked.”

  “What do you mean?”

  “I’ll explain everything when I find Yehala,” Nathan said shortly, dragging Julia behind him. Julia was forced to save her questions, but the more she looked about her, the more questions she had. Julia was astonished at the complexity of the City. It was beautiful and very clean. The buildings were gleaming white with beautiful plants growing everywhere, spilling over the edges of the buildings; people wore beautiful clothing that was very modest and rich in design and color. They appeared to be busy, many carried golden tablets, or silver tablets, conversing and talking. Some looked like regular people, some looked unearthly, very tall, and very broad shouldered with long white hair with crystal blue eyes and wearing long light colored flowing clothing.

  “Are we in Heaven?” she ventured.

  “No,” Nathan said, hurrying through one plaza after the other until he reached a multi-storied building with beautiful architecture that made her feel like it was made with the most delicate white porcelain with an abundance of green vines and flower’s growing up its sides around the detached pillars at each of its corners. A tall dark skinned man met them at the top of a wide set of stairs,

  “Yehala!” Nathan said, surprised.

  “She is not authorized to be here, Nathan.” Yehala said with a serious brow.

  Nathan drew in a deep breath before saying, “I know. But she was in danger. Quabin attacked the ranch and Meagan and the children are missing. Quabin has gone too far. I came to request the help of the Host.” Yehala glanced at Julia and waved them into his office. Nibilis was already there, speaking quietly with Roy.

  When Julia saw Roy, she ran to him and hugged him tight. He was covered in ash and soot. He gave her a one armed hug as his other arm was bleeding and in a sling. He seemed very stiff and did not look happy. He glared at Nathan and raised a finger at him.

  “It’s your fault! You did this!” his face was contorted in anger. Nibilis placed a hand on Roy’s shoulder. Julia stepped back as she looked at Nathan questioningly.

  “What happened?” Julia asked.

  Roy nearly choked on his emotions. “He brought a demon into my home and she got Q’s shadows inside and destroyed everything. They took my wife and kids!” He shouted.

  “Please,” Yehala raised his hands. “Please be calm.” Julia could feel Yehala’s energy of peace fill the room, but for Roy in his hot anger, the chaotic energy of Roy’s feelings disrupted the peaceful energy and it could not reach him.

  “Get him out of my sight!” Roy commanded. “He did this! He is Fallen and my family suffered for it.” Nathan looked down at his feet, refusing to meet anyone’s eyes, least of all, Julia’s. She felt her insides clench and the dull ache return to her heart. Fallen? Is that what she had felt earlier? Julia turned pleading eyes to Nathan and asked, “What is he talking about?”

  Nibillis nodded to Yehala. Yehala came around and took Roy by the arm just as two Pre-Mortals arrived at the door. Roy shrugged away from Yehala, glaring at Nathan as he was escorted out by the Pre-Mortals.

  “Nathan, what is he talking about?” Julia asked. Without a word, Nibilis and Yehala stepped out of the room, giving them the privacy they needed. Nathan hung his head, and would not meet Julia’s gaze. Julia took in a deep calming breath, remembering the feelings that she had experienced earlier and the things Liu had told her about someone close to her causing the hurt she was feeling but couldn’t identify.

  “I love you, Nathan.” Julia said calmly, hoping the confession would set him at ease and let him divulge what he was hiding. Nathan shook his head and said in a low voice, “I did something very wrong and I’m ashamed, Julia. I can’t face you right now.”

  “What happened?” she said with effort, not sure she wanted to know if it meant it would affect her feelings for Nathan. She could see he was struggling. She went to him and touched his hand.

  He pulled away, turned his back to her, and then said, “I’m so sorry Julia. I betrayed you.”

  “I don’t understand,” she replied quickly. “What do you mean exactly?” She stepped around him to look at his face. Tears streaked his cheeks. Julia suddenly knew what he meant, had felt the truth of it all along, she realized. “Who is she?” she said, fighting hard to control her emotions.

  “I don’t know,” he said despondently.

  “You don’t know?” she snapped, emotions fighting to be let loosed. “I can’t believe this! You slept with a stranger?”

  “No!” Nathan exclaimed.

  “No? You just said you didn’t know who she was!” Julia accused, anger heating her cheeks.

  Nathan’s mouth gaped, “I mean I thought I did. I thought she was you!”

  Julia reeled backwards and gasped, “What?”

  “No, I mean… I know she wasn’t you. I thought she was someone else…” Nathan tried again. Julia held up her hands. “Just stop. Just stop,” she nearly shouted. Just then, Nibilis and Yehala returned. Julia backed away, covering her face and cried.

  Nibilis turned to her consort and said, “Yehala, Julia is upset. Let me take her away so she can rest.” Yehala
nodded gravely as he kept his eyes transfixed on Nathan. Nibilis took Julia out of the room and led her down a side corridor to a smaller room with pale green furnishings and a small, but comfortable looking bed against a wall between two tall narrow windows. Julia went to a divan at the foot of the bed and sat down.

  “I am Nibilis. You are welcome here. Please relax and take all the time you need to rest. Do you have any questions for me?” Julia looked up at the elegant woman, and felt warmth about her and serenity that she could envy.

  “Do you know if Meagan and the boys are okay?” Nibilis shook her head. “Unfortunately, the dark powers are very strong in Torrey and growing more so every day, it is obscuring our view.”

  “I thought angels could see everything,” Julia said.

  “To a point. But Q is very strong and her forces are stronger than what we have available right now to deal with, so the balance is tipped in her favor. But not to worry, help is coming.”

  “What did Roy mean when he called Nathan ‘Fallen’?” Julia ventured, even though part of her didn’t want to know.

  Nibillis looked uncomfortable, and it gave Julia a deep pang of fear. “It’s not my place to say, Julia. Nathan must answer you.”

  Julia looked down at her hands clenched in her lap. “Is Matthew here?”

  “Yes,” she said slowly.

  “May I visit him?”

  Nibilis didn’t respond. Julia looked up to see the other woman looking back at her in contemplation.

  “May I?” Julia asked again.

  Nibilis nodded.

  Chapter 22

  The room was stifling hot when Meagan came to. Her first thoughts were for the safety of her children as she remembered the chaos that had erupted around her just after snack time. She remembered standing in the kitchen preparing snacks for the boys who gathered around the counter waiting, when she heard footsteps on the stairs. Meagan looked up and saw a blond woman coming down the stairs, a menacing look on her face. She barely glanced at Meagan as she walked past her and the children and went to the patio door off the living room. Without hesitation, she kicked through the glass with her bare foot, shattering it. The children gasped and Gabe began crying.