Silk

by Heidi McLaughlin

  He was finally able to sit up, and my body shifted under his. My back was on fire as the hard roots dug into my flesh. My hands moved to push myself up, and that’s when I felt it. Without thinking my fingers covered the stone, and I lifted my arm, putting all my weight into the swing.

  I didn’t know where it was going, but at this point I didn’t care. He screamed in pain as the rock connected with his face, and I took a tiny bit of pleasure in the sound of bone crushing. He fell away from me and I wasted no time scrambling to my feet. I fell back against the tree, but I was quick to straighten and get the hell out of there.

  I took off in the opposite direction. My arms held in front of me as I prayed I didn’t run into a tree or trip on something. The only thing that kept me from going into full-on panic was that I could still hear him wailing behind me, and the sound only grew in the distance.

  I screamed as I bumped into something solid, and familiar arms wrapped around me, holding me tightly. I only struggled for a second before Ryland’s familiar smell engulfed me with a sense of security, and I couldn’t hold it in any longer. I clung to him, sobbing into his chest, and my legs could no longer hold me up.

  Ryland supported my weight, pulling me up against his body. His arm slipped under my knees and he cradled me against him. My arms slipped around his neck and I buried my face into his warmth, his safety, as the tears poured from me.

  “Shh,” he soothed into my hair, holding my head protectively. “It’s okay. You’re safe now.”

  We were moving and then he was lowering us into a sitting position and I realized he was putting me down.

  I clung to him, my fingers dipping into his clothes. “Please don’t leave me, Ryland.” I begged. “Please just hold me.”

  “They can’t hurt you, Araya. I’ll be right back.” He was untangling my arms from around him, despite my desperate effort to keep him close.

  “What are you going to do?” I panicked.

  “Stay here.” He ignored my question and I could feel his anger rolling off him in violent waves.

  “Ryland. Please, please don’t leave me!”

  I had a death grip on his hand and I wasn’t about to loosen it.

  “Shit!” he hissed. “Sebastian!” he shouted and I jumped. “I’m sorry,” he said to me and then he was kneeling in front of me. “Sebastian’s here. He’s going to sit here with you until I come back.”

  “Why do you have to go at all, Ryland? Please just stay here with me!”

  I heard the approaching footsteps behind me and knew it was no use.

  “Everything’s going to be okay.”

  His lips brushed against mine and I flinched, instantly regretting it when I felt Ryland stiffen.

  “I’m sorry. You caught me off guard.” I tried to reassure him

  “Stay here with her!” he barked to Sebastian.

  “Where are you going?” his voice was hard, raspy. It was completely different from Ryland’s.

  There was silence after his question and I wondered what was being exchanged that I couldn’t see.

  “Stay with her until I get back.”

  And then he was gone.

  Sebastian rocked nervously on his feet beside me and that made me feel anxious. Was he nervous for Ryland or was he nervous because he had to babysit the blind girl?

  “Don’t worry,” he said suddenly and I jumped. “Sorry.”

  “It’s okay.”

  The wind had picked up and my teeth chattered. I wrapped my hands around my bare arms and rubbed them up and down.

  “Don’t worry about what?”

  “He won’t kill them,” he said simply.

  I turned my head in his direction. “Is that supposed to comfort me?”

  “It was, yeah.”

  I looked straight ahead again. “Thanks, I guess.”

  My legs bounced up and down, and even after Sebastian’s words, I was far from comforted.

  “Can you see him?”

  “No.”

  “We shouldn’t have let him go.”

  “Honestly, Red, I wasn’t going to stop him. Those assholes deserve whatever they have coming to them. I would have done it myself if Ryland hadn’t.”

  Tears slid down my face and this time I didn’t jump when the thunder filled the silence. The smell of rain filled my nose, and I breathed in deeply. Seconds later, I felt the first drops on my arms and wiped them away.

  “Here he comes,” Sebastian said, and my chest nearly caved in with relief.

  I stood and Ryland was there, his arms wrapped around me, pulling me into his warmth, and I melted into his embrace.

  “Do me a favor,” he said above my head. “Go wait for me over there.”

  I felt the jerk in his body under my cheek and I lifted my head.

  I tried to turn in Ryland’s arms, but he wasn’t having it. “What are you doing?”

  Both ignored me, and I heard his brothers retreating footsteps.

  “Sebastian,” I called after him, and the sound of his steps stalled.

  I wanted to beg him not to go. I wanted him to talk sense into Ryland, not be his sidekick, but they both were beyond the point of listening to me. Sebastian would do whatever Ryland asked him to do and then add in his own suggestions. He’d just said as much.

  My voice wouldn’t be the voice of reason tonight. So instead, I just said, “Thank you for waiting with me.”

  “You’re welcome,” he mumbled, walking off.

  We were alone.

  I could feel the tension underneath Ryland’s bunched muscles. He was so angry, and it terrified me. I was petrified that he was going to say this was becoming too hard, that he didn’t want to have to be my babysitter, constantly having to come to my rescue because some jerkoff spouted something off about my blindness or pushed me on the street. Because I couldn’t protect myself from a couple of drunk guys who liked to rough up girls.

  “You’re freezing,” Ryland said into my hair and pulled back to take off his jacket. “I should have given this to you earlier, I’m sorry.” He wrapped his jacket around my shoulders, and then pulled me back into his arms.

  “I’m fine. You’re here. That’s all that matters now.”

  “I should’ve been here earlier. Why are you still here, Araya? Where’s Carl? You said he would be here to get you before it got dark.” I swallowed hard. I’d never seen him this angry before. “Do you know what could have happened to you tonight? What they would have done…” His voice trailed off.

  “I’m fine, Ryland. Honest.” I was far from fine, but I wasn’t about to admit that to him.

  “You don’t have to do that for me.” He sighed. “Don’t downplay what happened to make me feel better. This isn’t about me. I don’t need you to comfort me.”

  “I know. He really didn’t do anything, but—”

  “Don’t,” he whispered. “I can’t talk about what they did to you, Araya. Not yet. If I think about him touching you, I’ll go back and kill the son of a bitch.” I shuddered at the thought and Ryland pulled me closer.

  We were both quiet for a long time, just standing there while Ryland held me close. The promise of rain dampened my skin and the thick scent altered the air around us, becoming dense and muggy.

  No sooner had I thought it before everything around us was being bathed in a warm sprinkle. It was light and drizzled against our bodies softly. My clothes began to stick to my skin and my hair weighed down heavily.

  Ryland pulled me to him and rushed us across the grass in search of protection. Seconds later we were under shelter and safe from the rain. I shivered violently inside of Ryland’s jacket and pulled it tighter against me.

  “Are you okay?” he asked, rubbing his hands up and down my covered arms.

  I shook my head. “How did you know to come?” I finally asked. “Not that I’m complaining.” I attempted to make him smile.

  If he smiled, I didn’t feel it in his words. “I don’t know. I knew there was something off this afternoon when
I brought you back here. You were in too much of a rush to get rid of me.”

  “I could have just been tired of your company.”

  He scoffed and that made me smile. “I find that highly unlikely.”

  “Why?”

  “For the same reason I don’t get tired of you.”

  I lifted my head, resting my chin on his chest. “What reason is that?”

  “Because you’re too damn addicting, hummingbird. Everything about you… I’m always left wanting more. I want all of you, all the time, every day, and the more I’m with you, the stronger the craving gets.”

  His words sucked the air from around us and I fought to fill my lungs long enough to take a breath.

  I knew exactly how he felt.

  “We have to call the cops,” he finally said.

  I panicked. “No, we can’t. If Nina found out what happened, she’ll never let me leave the apartment again. I won’t get to see you anymore.”

  Then I wondered if maybe that’s what he wanted and could I really blame him if he did? He didn’t want to spend the rest of his life feeling like he had to take care of me, and no matter what I said or how much I learned, that’s honestly how everyone was going to see me.

  “Is that what you want? If it is, I won’t be hurt. I won’t fight it.”

  I looked up and his face was a dark smudge against the moonlight.

  “Of course not,” he growled. He cupped both my cheeks and his hands heated my skin. He tensed as if he wanted to say more, but he didn’t. “I won’t let that happen.” He leaned his forehead into mine. His breath was warm and sweet, chasing away the scent of stale beer, bad breath, and fear. “Does it hurt?”

  His thumb brushed over the corners of my mouth and along my bottom lip and I remembered the fingers that had dug into my jaw. I’d forgotten all about it, but a mark must have been left, and running my tongue over my bottom lip, I could feel the split. My tongue moved over the inside of my cheek. It was tender, but nothing I couldn’t handle.

  “No. I’m sorry, Ryland. I…” I didn’t know what else to say.

  “For God’s sake, Araya, why are you sorry? You didn’t do anything wrong. Please tell me you know that.”

  “I’m sorry you have to keep coming to my rescue

  “Your rescue? Hummingbird, you made a mess of that asshole’s face. You have no idea how proud of you I am.”

  I frowned. “I did?”

  “Hell yeah, you did! Broke his nose. I found him whimpering like a damn baby in a fetal position. He was soaked in blood.”

  It wasn’t something to be oddly delighted by, but I was. “I broke his nose?”

  He laughed, kissing my forehead. “You’re a feisty little hummingbird. A modern-day Mohammed Ali.”

  “You’re proud of me?”

  It had been so long since I’d heard those words. They danced around my head.

  “Yes, Araya. Besides, everyone needs to be rescued sometimes, so don’t for one second think you need it more than the next person.”

  “I love you so much, Ryland.”

  With all my heart it was true. I had fallen madly in love with the boy who made the world I lived in a beautiful kind of darkness. He made me want to live again, when all this time I’d just been surviving a life I thought I would be forever chained to. He pulled me away from the lies and excuses I choked down to convince myself I couldn’t do anything extraordinary. I had let it consume me, limit me. I was done.

  I didn’t think I would ever fall in love, but I did and it didn’t matter if he loved me too. He gave me something much more and there was nothing I could give him that was half as amazing, but I could love him. I would love him always and then I would reach beyond that and love him until forever. My life would never be as bright as it was when he was in it, and that’s what I was going to take with me.

  “Araya…” he started, and I felt the beginning of dread.

  The second my name left his lips, I heard my name being ripped angrily through our moment from a distance.

  Ryland

  Twenty-Five

  I didn’t have time to absorb what Araya had just told me before she was being shouted at from somewhere behind us.

  “It’s Carl,” Araya whispered franticly.

  I turned my head in the direction of the shout and narrowed my eyes. Pulling her closer, I watched Carl stumble drunkenly around in the dark.

  “He’s plastered,” I said with disgust.

  If it wasn’t bad enough that she already had to be man handled once tonight, now she had to deal with it again from someone who should be protecting her.

  “It’ll be okay, Ryland.” I stared down into her face.

  “This isn’t the first time you’ve had to deal with this, is it?” She didn’t say anything. “Is it?”

  “No,” she whispered, ashamed.

  “Shit!”

  I hated that she carried an embarrassment that didn’t belong to her. No one should be shamed by this except the grown-ass man who was too drunk to keep himself upright.

  “Araya, goddamn it! Where the hell are you?” he bellowed.

  “You can’t go with him,” I told her, getting ready to scoop her up and take her away, but she was pulling away from me.

  “I have to, Ryland. I have to!”

  The panic on her face tugged at my chest, making it ache. She’d been through enough. I wouldn’t make tonight harder on her.

  “Okay, shh.” I pulled her back into my arms, wanting to keep her there, protect her from everything. “Everything will be okay.”

  I heard Carl swear and turned around in time to see him slip, landing hard on his ass in the wet grass. He crawled to his knees before standing and stumbling forward.

  “Araya!”

  “You have to go before he sees you. Please, Ryland.” She begged, pushing me away. She pulled my jacket from around her, giving it to me. “Please.”

  “You’re sure you’ll be okay?”

  “Yes! I promise.” She would agree with anything I said just to get rid of me.

  I pulled her to me quickly and brushed my lips across hers. She swayed and leaned into me. It wasn’t enough for either of us, not nearly enough. I wanted to taste her sweetness on my tongue, my lips, but he was getting louder.

  “I’ll see you tomorrow.” I brushed against her lips again and ducked from underneath the gazebo.

  “Araya—”

  “Here! I’m here, Carl.” Her sweet voice drifted across the park.

  “What the hell are you doing all the way over there? How did you even get over there?” He reached the gazebo, leaning into Araya and nearly bringing them both down.

  “I moved when it started raining.” She adjusted their weight, holding him against her, and he lugged his arm around her shoulders and her knees nearly buckled.

  “I fell on my ass, thanks to you. Wait until Nina hears about this.”

  “I’m sorry, Carl,” she said.

  “I’m sure you are. Let’s go.” He straightened himself and took Araya’s arm, pulling her into the dark.

  Hearing her apologize to that jackass was the last straw and I moved to rush to her, but a firm hand caught my arm.

  “Don’t do it, little brother. Seems like you’ll only make it worse on her.”

  I pulled my arm free, glaring at him, which caused him to tilt his head to the side, backing away with his hands up.

  I turned around to watch them leave.

  “Carl sounds like a dick face,” Sebastian said behind me as I watched Araya being dragged roughly away by her arm.

  My eyes narrowed into sharp slits and my fists clenched tightly at my side as I watched Araya trip and Carl nearly rip her arm from its socket. If she hadn’t already been through so much tonight, I would’ve gone after them and showed Carl what it felt like to be dragged around like a rag doll. Then I’d take her away from those people.

  Turning away, I stalked past Sebastian. “Let’s do this fast,” I snapped.

  “What e
xactly are we doing? Not that I’m not in, just wondering if you have a plan.”

  “Yep. You take him.” I pointed to the passed-out one. “I got this one.” Walking around his limp body, I stepped on something, causing it to snap under my weight.

  Bending over, I picked up the crushed object and realized it was Araya’s sunglasses. As much as I hated these things, it pissed me off to no end that he broke them. I didn’t want her to keep herself hidden, but it was a way for her to feel in control of something.

  “You really have it bad for this chick, don’t you?” Sebastian said, already working on his guy.

  Tossing the glasses aside, I started in on mine. “What are you talking about?”

  “Are you being serious right now? You were ready to commit murder tonight.”

  “You saw what they did to her! Are you telling me it didn’t make you want to beat the shit out of them?”

  “Yeah, it was wrong and of course I wanted to beat the shit out of these two lowlifes.” He kicked the guy’s leg, not hard, but enough that the guy moaned and attempted to turn away. “But you were ready to kill, Ry. You were loaded and cocked.”

  I didn’t say anything. Partly because I didn’t know what to say and mostly because I knew it was true. If Araya hadn’t been there, shaking in the wind like a fallen leaf in a thunderstorm, I don’t know that I wouldn’t have killed the guy. I wanted to, and murder the color of bright red had been all I could see.

  Even though he was being a pain in my ass right now, I was glad I had Sebastian here to help me. If I needed a partner in crime, I wouldn’t have asked for anyone else.

  I’d been annoyed at having to pick him up from The Underground because he lost all his money. Sebastian drank, fought, and gambled away his problems and his inheritance. Having only gotten his two years ago, half of it was already gone. He didn’t exactly want our parents’ money, but he loved to piss them off and nothing pissed off our father more than Sebastian throwing away his millions.

  As I drove him back to his apartment to sleep off his buzz, my thoughts kept going back to Araya and her strange behavior when I dropped her off at the park. She was in such a rush to get rid of me; it just felt off.