Desires, Sweets, Secrets (Men of NatEx #2): A Package Handlers Novel

by Kyle Autumn

  That’s all she has to say to let me know that she knows. Baking is in our blood. It’s our communication. Some people can speak without words, and we do—through food.

  “I don’t want to talk about it,” I groan, putting the lid on the box.

  “That’s just too bad.” She sets the rest of the muffin on the counter. “I’ve been gone for a month, which is plenty of time to fall in l—”

  “Nope.” I start waving my hands in the air. “No. Don’t even say it.”

  “Well, I don’t have to for it to be true,” she says. “We both know I can taste it in this muffin.”

  All I can do is shake my head. And then change the subject. “How about you tell me all about your trip first?”

  She sighs, but she can’t fight her smile. “It was great. I saw lots of stuff. Met some new people. All that fun stuff.” Then she claps her hands against the counter. “But I’m glad to be home now so you can fill me in on this new development.”

  “No!” I laugh over her voice as she continues to persuade me to talk.

  “Yes,” she insists, picking off another piece of the muffin. “Indulge me. I rarely see you guys anymore. I want to know what’s going on with you.” She pops that piece into her mouth and points to it. “Because this says a lot.”

  I rest my elbows on the counter and put my head in my hands. “Grandma, I honestly don’t know what to tell you.” With my gaze on the counter, I squeeze my eyes shut.

  “Well, I know exactly what you can tell me,” she throws back at me as the bell above the door rings. “Sorry. We’re closed,” she tells whoever walked in, but I’m dealing with too much to spare any energy to raise my head. The bell rings again as the door closes, so my grandma continues. “Amelia, you can tell me if this muffin means things with your husband have gotten better.”

  “Husband?” The deep, masculine voice is familiar—all too familiar.

  The hairs on the back of my neck rise as that voice hits me in the heart. This is not how he was supposed to find out. I was supposed to tell him myself. After what happened with Danielle, I needed to be the one to sit him down and explain the situation to him. And I should have done that before this. Before I agreed to have dinner with his family while I’m basically a fraud.

  “You’re married?” Jeremy asks, pure shock and anger radiating off him. He blinks several times as if that’ll bring some clarity.

  Behind him, a devastated Danielle appears. That second bell wasn’t the door opening as Jeremy left—it was Danielle coming in. And the look on her face pierces my heart.

  “Tell me that’s not true,” she pleads, tears shining in her already-red eyes. Then she takes a step around her brother. “Tell me you’re not married. Tell me this shit hasn’t happened to my brother again.”

  “W-wait, what?” I stutter out, standing up straighter and tilting my head to the side. “Again? What do you mean again?”

  “Dani, don’t,” Jeremy says, reaching out for Danielle’s arm.

  But she yanks it away and keeps walking toward me. “I confided in you. You said you’d be there for me. But you’re just like she was—a lying cheater.”

  “Dani,” Jeremy snarls. “Let’s go. Matt and Cadence are waiting for us.”

  “No!” his sister shouts, her chin wobbling. “That’s not fair, Jer. You deserve so much better than that after spending five years making up for your mistakes. Five years of apologizing to me for nearly wrecking our lives. Five freaking years”—she stabs the air with one hand, her fingers wide open, to drive the point home—“of doing nothing but studying and working your ass off to graduate from college and change your life for the better.”

  “Whoa,” I say without thinking first, my head jerking back. Then I look at Jeremy. “Did you just graduate from college?”

  “What difference does that make?” he asks in a bitter tone.

  At first, words escape me. But then some finally make it past my lips. “Well, I mean, that means you’re…young.” And I immediately regret that word choice.

  He puts his hands on his hips and lets out a humorless laugh. “Let’s not act like my age is suddenly the problem here. If you had an issue with me being younger than you, you could have voiced it when you told me about your husband,” he grits out through clenched teeth.

  “Okay, time out!” my grandma shouts, standing from her stool and putting her hands out at her sides.

  Both Danielle and Jeremy slide their gazes to her like they’re noticing her here for the first time. Whereas I can’t stop looking at them. So much has been left unsaid in the pursuit to move on and pretend like I can have a normal life when my life is anything but normal.

  My grandma faces the two of them. “First of all, I’m Giana. Nice to meet you both.”

  Neither Danielle nor Jeremy says anything, though Jeremy nods his acknowledgement.

  “My granddaughter here was just about to inform me about her husband—”

  Danielle opens her mouth to speak, but my grandma stops her by waving a hand in the air.

  “—and before you go and judge, you need to know what happened,” she says, finishing what she was going to say.

  “Well, it’s too bad for her that we don’t care,” Danielle spits out. Then she flips her gaze to her brother. “Right, Jeremy?”

  His nostrils flare as he stares at me. If looks could kill, I’d probably be dead on the floor. But, if looks could portray everything a person wanted to say, his would. And it’s saying everything we should have said before this point.

  You should have told me. If you’d been honest, maybe I would have given you a chance to explain. Maybe I’m just getting out in the world after college, but I’m not some stupid boy. I’m a man who wanted more than secrets and lies even though I’ve kept one or two of my own. And I should have told you, so I shouldn’t be this mad at you, but fuck, Meli. Fuck.

  Maybe I’m reading too far into it, but I feel those words in my heart. My heart, which is breaking into a million pieces when I didn’t think it had enough left of it to break at all.

  Instead of saying any of that, he says nothing at all before Danielle takes his hand and drags him out of the bakery. The bell rings over the door as they make their exit, and that sound has never felt so final and disturbing in all the time I’ve been here to hear it.

  “So that was Chocolate Chip Muffin, huh?” my grandma asks while my head spins, my heart aches, and my soul shatters.

  While staring at the door, I speak to her with no emotion in my voice. I have nothing else but truth to tell at this point. “I pulled the plug on Danny two days ago,” I tell her without blinking. “He wasn’t ever going to improve, and he’d even gotten worse this week. And I was going to tell him after dinner tonight. Dinner with his family.” Then I finally snap out of my focused stare and aim it at the counter instead. “But, now, I…”

  My grandma comes around the counter and wraps me up into a big hug. “Oh, Amelia Jean.” She kisses me on my cheek as I fall apart in her arms. “It’s okay that you didn’t tell him. It’s your truth, and your truth always matters, right?”

  Those words slip into the cracks of my heart. “Danny always said that.”

  “I know.” She releases me enough to hold my gaze. “And that’s why now’s the best time to focus on that. You couldn’t tell him until you’d made your peace with it, and you couldn’t make that decision until you knew he wouldn’t come back.”

  Weakly, I nod as tears fall from my eyes.

  “Okay, then.” She gives me a small smile as she snags a napkin from the counter and dabs under my eyes. Then she says, “And it sounds like Chocolate Chip Muffin has some secrets of his own, too.”

  Despite myself, I laugh. “He has a name, Grandma.”

  “One I’m sure I’ll learn when you properly introduce him to me.”

  With her hopeful gaze on me, I take a deep breath. “Okay, before I go after him, because I know that’s what you want me to do—”

  She widens her eyes,
purses her lips, and raises her eyebrows in an obviously, that’s what I’m saying expression.

  “—want to tell me whatever you really came here to say?”

  At first, she opens her mouth like she wants to tell me. She stays like that for moment before she ultimately decides to close her mouth and shake her head. “Nope. It’s waited a while. It can wait again.” Then she practically shoves me forward as she guides me toward the door.

  I barely manage to snatch my purse from behind the counter as we walk out of the bakery. Once we’re outside, I hug my grandma super tight. “I love you,” I tell her. “Thank you for listening and not judging.”

  “I never do,” she says.

  But we finish her thought together. “Except for when it comes to baking.” Then we both laugh.

  “I’m proud of you, Amelia.” My grandma takes my face between her hands. “It’s going to be okay. Just tell your truth. And then listen to his, okay?”

  I nod, my heart swelling with the desire to believe that it can be that easy. And then I hop into my car with more hope than I deserve.

  ∞∞∞

  Jeremy

  When Dani and I get home, Cass is ready to go on the defensive for her sister. But I’ve had nothing but time to stew over it and my sister’s tireless rant about how it’s utter bullshit that I have to go through something like this again. Which, if I can be honest, kind of makes me happy. Knowing she’s on my side this time is a pleasant change of events.

  “You have to hear her out,” Cass says as soon as I walk in the door.

  Meli likely texted her, but that doesn’t mean I need to listen.

  “No, Cass, I don’t,” I tell her, pushing past her into my own house. “She lied about something super important to me, something that would have made me stay the hell away from her in the first place.”

  “Which is probably why she didn’t tell you up front,” her sister reasons, following me into the kitchen.

  I’m well aware that I have an audience, but that’s not going to stop me if Cass doesn’t want to back down from this. So, in front of Matt, Cadence, Dani, Derek, and Aria, the last two playing with Aria’s toy trucks on the living room floor, I say, “That’s bullshit and you know it.”

  Cass shakes her head. “I disagree, Jeremy. One hundred percent, and if you’d listen to her, I’m sure you’ll understand.”

  Dani comes to my defense. “I don’t know why he’d even want to listen to her. Given his past, he shouldn’t have to.”

  “Do she even know about your past?” Cass asks, flicking her gaze between me and my sister. “Did you tell her? Were you honest with her?”

  “That’s not the point,” Dani starts to say, “because a married woman—”

  But Cass won’t let her finish. “It is the point. Because, if you hear the truth and not the version of the truth you’re spinning in your head, you’d see that.”

  I’m breathing too hard for my brain to make sense of what she’s saying. I’m too wound up, too fucking upset and frustrated to see straight. So I’m glad when she spells it out for me.

  “Honestly, Jeremy,” Cass continues. “Have you ever seen another man at her house? Have you seen any photos of a family hanging on her walls? Has she ever been any place other than the bakery when you’ve wanted to know where she was? Is her stupid lawn mower still broken? How could she possibly have a husband hidden away in there? And why wouldn’t he have done something about her damn lawn mower?”

  As I think about these questions, I bite my lip. No photos hang on her walls. No man has ever been to that house—that I know of—besides me. She always comes home alone—if she comes home at all, but business is busy, so that speaks for itself. She has to be spending all of her time there, when she’s not with me, to take care of all the orders she gets—even with Dani’s help.

  “And seriously.” Cass points at her chest. “Would I have encouraged her to go out with you? For heaven’s sake, Jeremy. You have to know that I wouldn’t have done that in a million years if she were really in a relationship of any kind.”

  Before I can say anything, Matt speaks up from his place near the cabinets. “She makes good points, Jer. Maybe you need to—”

  “No!” Dani shouts, balling her hands into fists. “No, he doesn’t. He doesn’t need to do anything.”

  “Dani,” I say. “It’s okay.”

  “No, it’s not!” She approaches Cass. “It doesn’t matter why she lied, just that she did.”

  But Cass shakes her head and then pins me with her gaze. “Did you ask her if she was married?”

  At that, I have to shake my head too. Because, no, I didn’t. I didn’t think I had to, but still. “No,” I admit, scrubbing a hand over my chin. “So she didn’t lie to me.”

  “Just like you didn’t lie to her,” Cass reasons, “when you didn’t tell her what you did when you were in high school.” Then she scrunches her face. “Which, oddly enough, wasn’t that long ago…”

  “Did you Google me or something?” I ask, folding my arms over my chest.

  Unashamedly, she nods as there’s a knock on the door. Cadence slips around Cass while she says, “Of course I did. Anyone who applies for a job with Amelia’s bakery has to go through me.”

  It’s my turn to furrow my brow and wrinkle my nose. “What are you talking about? I didn’t—”

  But that’s all I get out because Cadence returns to the kitchen, a follower coming in behind her.

  “Hey, Jeremy? Someone’s here to see you,” Cadence says calmly. She’s done a good job of staying out of this, but she doesn’t look like she’s comfortable or enjoying it at all.

  A contrite-but-hopeful-looking Meli joins the party, giving everyone a small, unsure wave. “Sorry I’m late,” she says before pausing and then finishing with, “if I’m still invited.”

  “Of course you are,” Cadence says, putting her arm around Meli’s shoulders and her other hand on Meli’s arm. “You’re always welcome here.”

  “This isn’t your house,” Dani snidely reminds Cadence, whose lips thin into a straight line as she looks at Matt.

  Matt shrugs, effectively telling us all that he’s staying out of it.

  “Well, you’re welcome with me,” Cadence tells her.

  Meli smiles her way, but it’s small and doesn’t reach her eyes. Then she looks at me, practically staring into my soul. “Can we talk?” she asks, her voice quiet.

  “He doesn’t have to talk to you,” Dani informs her, a hand on her hip.

  “I know.” Meli puts her head down before bringing it back up to look at me. “But I hope he still will. I’d really like to explain.”

  For several tense moments, she and I have a stare-down, her eyes pleading with me to give her just a few minutes. Whereas mine want to know why. And then I remember that I would like to give her a chance to hear about my past too. If nothing else, after all of this, I want to know why she felt she couldn’t tell me about this mysterious husband of hers. What about it was so important to hide it from me?

  So, without taking my gaze off her, I address the room. “Everyone out.”

  “Actually,” Meli says while everyone grumbles around me, “I thought it’d be easier if you and I go to my house. Everyone can stay and eat, if that’s okay.”

  A chorus of, “That works for me,” and other similar comments ring out around the room, so I break into action and start walking her way to get this over with. Cass has a smug look on her face, but for a split second, she also appears to be thankful that I’m doing this. However, Dani is not so pleased.

  She grabs my arm on my way to Meli. “You don’t have to do this,” she grits out.

  “I know,” I tell her. Then I pull her into my arms and whisper in her ear. “But maybe you should tell Matt what you told me earlier while I’m gone.”

  At first, she shakes her head. “No, Jer. I’m not—”

  “I’m going to go be brave and hear Meli out,” I say quietly to only her, hugging her tighter. “Y
ou be as brave as you were earlier with me, okay?”

  It takes a few moments, but she melts a little and loses her rigid stance. Then she pulls back and nods. “Good luck,” she says.

  “You too.” I give her a small nod and then start walking, passing Meli on my way out the door.

  Seconds later, she’s behind me, rushing to catch up. “Thank you,” she says when she reaches me.

  I don’t say anything back, but I do tip my head. A part of me doesn’t trust myself to speak. Not yet. Not until I hear her side of things. I might let all of my hard work with Dr. Setts go to waste if I open my mouth.

  So, instead, once we’re inside her door and she’s shut it, I keep my mouth closed, but I kiss her anyway. I can’t help it. Though a part of me knows I shouldn’t speak, another part of me is so drawn to her that I push her against the door and press my lips to hers. Immediately, she wraps her arms around me and hitches her leg around my waist, digging her heel into my ass to get closer to me.

  Maybe it’s selfish, but I want one more time with her. If the shit is going to hit the fan and this is going to go to hell, I’ll end up celibate yet again. But I also need to memorize the feel of being inside her before I never get the chance again. Everything with her is amazing, and no matter the lies between us, I don’t want to give her up.

  Which means I pour everything I have into kissing her. Into slipping down to her neck and kissing the soft spot behind her ear. Into lifting her by her bottom so I can make my way to her cleavage. Into holding her up so she can rip her shirt off so I can reach even more of her. Then, with her fully in my arms, I carry her down the hall, into her room, and over to her bed.

  There, all of our clothes go flying into a pile by her closet until we’re both bare and panting. I even have to stop kissing her for a moment, at the brink of running out of oxygen. Though the punishment of death seems acceptable if these are my last moments connected to her like this.