Dunedrifter

by Elisabeth Wheatley

  Talitha studied the open expanse of the desert before them, the same sloping dunes and jutted outcrops that stretched in every direction as far as anyone had traveled. Reality came back to her. “What are we doing, Ashek?”

  “I don’t know.”

  “As ensaadi, I can’t…take whomever I want. I have to consider Ilios and the repercussions.” I am not Esreth. “Whoever I do take—if I ever do—would have to be ready to stand with me before mobs of nobles, foreign dignitaries, and the delicate balance with the New Gods and the Lonely God.”

  The Dunedrifter stood abruptly, back to her. “Don’t forget, I haven’t yet named my price for this venture.”

  Chills shot down Talitha’s spine. Surely he wouldn’t? There was no way he would demand that. “You’re asking for something that’s not mine to give.”

  Something in her words must have given her away. “You don’t actually believe you have no choice. You can do whatever you want.”

  “You’re wrong.” Talitha hadn’t meant the words to come out so harsh, but they did. “I can’t—I won’t. My cousin and my brother before both indulged in their own lusts. It ends with me. I won’t!”

  Her last word broke out in a shout and echoed back, repeating over and over in a fading refrain.

  Ashek kept his back to her. His shoulders went rigid and his left hand clenched his sword hilt—the Ilian sword that had been hers. “Because I’m a Dunedrifter?” He spun around. “I am worthy of you.” He clenched his eyes shut for just a moment.

  Talitha stood. “It’s not about worthiness—”

  “Then what?” He braced himself in a square stance with his shoulders rigid and two invisible lines running from his shoulders to his hips to his feet. “Can you even explain it?”

  “This is weakness!” Talitha shouted, Shaza’s words from a year ago coming back out her lips.

  Ashek flinched at that word—that dangerous, dangerous word. “Weakness?”

  “What I want is irrelevant.” Talitha tossed her arms in the air. “What I feel—or could feel—” if I let myself “—is irrelevant. Ilios is my mother, my child, my master, my ward, and my only lover. There is no room for anything else!”

  This time, Ashek didn’t argue. He stood there, still as stone, taking her words like a dog takes a beating—right before he bites.

  “I will not wed someone who offers my city nothing.”

  “Nothing?” Ashek snarled. “Then why did you come to me when you needed help? Where was your city when you needed it most?” He made to take a step toward her, then cut it short. “I am nothing?”

  “I didn’t say—”

  “Yes, you did!” Ashek’s face reddened. Silhouetted by the rising sun, he appeared to be on fire. “You think I am nothing. Like your grandfather said—a sand rat.”

  “I have never said that.”

  “No, but you said I offer you nothing.” Ashek trembled. He raked a hand through his hair, nostrils flaring as he glared past Talitha.

  Silence hung between them. Guilt punched Talitha in the gut—she had insulted him when he had agreed to help her. Yet she couldn’t apologize, couldn’t mend the wound between them. It would be a mistake, just like that kiss last night and the ones before.

  “We need to get moving.” Talitha rose and spun on her heel. “The sun will be up soon.”

  Ashek followed her in silence.

  Every conversation, every interaction, every look had seemed another step toward an inevitable destination. It was a place she’d imagined a thousand times over, half with longing, half with horror. She knew full well what would happen. Even admitting it had seemed another guarantee that it would come to fruitition.

  Now she could feel the gulf between them—wide as a canyon and cold as a corpse.

  She was an ensaadi—her life belonged to her city and her people. Her duty was to put them first—no matter if tears stung her eyes. She whispered a prayer of thanks that Ashek couldn’t see her face.

  Chapter Nine

  Talitha rode beside Ashek again, though she was sure everyone could tell they’d quarreled. They avoided looking at one another, keeping their sirrushes well apart.

  Breida pointed them in the direction of Xeram’s last known whereabouts. Shaza had taken responsibility for the girl, having her lashed to the back of his sirrush.

  Shaza whispered something to Emalek, gesturing between the ensaadi and the Dunedrifter when he thought she wasn’t looking. Emalek shrugged in response.

  Much of the day passed in silence. Ashek kept his distance and Talitha kept hers. They exchanged perhaps two words.

  That evening, Ashek approached her as she was unsaddling her sirrush. Unannounced, he came into her line of vision. “When we free your general, I will see you provisioned and then we are parting ways.”

  Talitha was hardly in a position to negotiate with him at this point. “How would you have me deliver your compensation?”

  “Xeram will have loot. That will be sufficient to satisfy my men.”

  Talitha inclined her head and Ashek barely spoke to her after that. Two more days of riding passed. Kasrei tried to ask her what had happened on the second night and Talitha used words she hadn’t said sober in years.

  Near late afternoon of the third day, a dark shape on the top of a distant cliff came into view.

  “That’s where the sand rat is holed,” Breida said angrily, pointing with her tied hands. “Can you kill me now?”

  “Be patient,” Shaza snapped back.

  “Tivosha,” Ashek said. “An old fort from the time of the oceans. A favorite of Xeram’s.”

  From this distance, it was difficult to make out more than a few turrets and crumbling battlements. Most likely, it had not been properly maintained for centuries.

  “We should circle around and scout. See if we can confirm Gilsazi is there.” Talitha pointed to the plateau above the fortress. “Is there a way we can approach from above?”

  “Perhaps.” Ashek shaded his eyes with a hand. “It has been some time since I’ve been here.”

  It was their first real conversation in two days.

  “How long will that take?” Kasrei asked, coming up from behind.

  “Another day at least.”

  Kasrei let loose a string of profanities.

  “You are sure he’s there?” Shaza twisted around to glare at the clanswoman behind him. The young man’s methods were half intimidation, half charm. It was one of the things that made him such a dangerous interrogator.

  “He was headed there three days ago. He left my brethren and I on the cliffs to kill any who approached.”

  Talitha looked to Ashek. Her own thoughts were mirrored on his face.

  “He knew we were coming? From the direction of Kilgal?”

  Breida shrugged. “Apparently.”

  Talitha clenched the reins of her sirrush. For such a quick response, word she was coming would have been sent as soon as she left Ilios.

  “There’s a traitor in your court.” Ashek dropped his voice. “Your oh so precious city.”

  Talitha studied the back of her sirrush’s head, refusing to rise to the bait.

  There was a short list of people bold enough. Talitha wouldn’t have to search long when she returned.

  Talitha and the Dunedrifters had only one advantage—Xeram probably didn’t know they were aware of being betrayed.

  “Let’s go.” Talitha was too tired, too angered, too fearful, too much of everything to argue.

  Ashek had every right to be angry. That changed absolutely nothing.

  The ensaadi spurred her sirrush to the north east. They would have to head past Tivosha and hook back around. Xeram should have no reason to expect an attack from above and it seemed their best option to rescue Gilsazi.

  “I wonder how much this traitor would pay for your head,” Ashek mused. “Or perhaps they simply want you humiliated. Best not to make a martyr of you.”

  Talitha kept her gaze trained ahead.

  “Thou
gh if it’s humiliation they’re after, I don’t see why they press on. After all, the whole city must know of your association with sand rats.”

  Talitha pulled her sirrush to a stop. She looked Ashek square in the face. “Go on.”

  “What?”

  “Say it.”

  “Say what?”

  “Everything.” Talitha inhaled a sharp breath. “Tell me how I’m a failure at every treaty and alliance I’ve ever attempted. Tell me I’m nothing but a whore for Ilios. What about how I left two ensaaks dead last year?” Talitha’s voice cracked. “Remind me my brother was the first heir and the one everyone loved. Tell me the New Gods are against me, or the Lonely God. Tell me!”

  Ashek glared at her.

  “If it makes you feel better, say it! I’ll take every word and I won’t say a thing because it’s all true and I still need you to save my friend.” Talitha took a gulp of air, then shouted again, “Now tell me!”

  The Dunedrifter blinked at her.

  At her back, Kasrei said something. Someone else made a remark she didn’t catch. Talitha kept her attention on Ashek.

  When a ten count of heartbeats passed and he still had not said a word, Talitha dug her heels into her sirrush and sped off.

  They had to go a good ten leagues before they found a place that was low enough for them to try scaling the slopes of the cliff. The rocky plateau slanted upwards at uneven and jagged angles. Loose rocks tumbled under the sirrushes’ paws. Many of the animals were tiring and stumbled. Warbling in distress, they clambered back to their feet and pressed on.

  After those first few miles, the ground softened, though rocks still jutted up every few paces. They were able to speed up somewhat, but the animals would still need to rest. Perhaps when they took the fortress—as Ashek seemed to think they would.

  “What’s our plan?” Shaza finally said, breaking the icy silence of the past two hours.

  “I’ll deal with Xeram,” Ashek said. “You,” he gestured to Talitha, “take your magian and Emalek to find the general.”

  “I’m with the ensaadi?” Emalek bolted upright in his saddle. “I always come with you.”

  “And you will come with me many times yet. Tonight, I want you with Talitha.”

  Emalek said no more, but Talitha could hardly imagine he was pleased.

  “What can you tell me of the fort layout? Where would they be likely to keep Gilsazi?” Talitha tried to turn her thoughts back to the task at hand.

  “The upper chambers,” Ashek guessed. “They were probably expecting an attack from below, so keeping him as far from the ground as possible makes sense.”

  Talitha had to agree. “Once we have Gilsazi?”

  “Your magian will no doubt need to heal him.”

  Talitha swallowed. Gilsazi had withstood torture even as a child, but she shuddered to think of what might be done to him. If there had been no intent to ransom him and it had simply been a trap all along…was he even still alive?

  The ensaadi looked back to Kasrei. Gilsazi had better still be alive. Otherwise, those who’d taken his life would answer a hundred times over to the woman who’d shared it.

  Kasrei knotted her sirrush’s reins over and over. Dust and dirt smudged her face, darkening the puckered scar that slashed over her nose and cheek. Her full lips pursed and unpursed, full and smooth though her hands were chapped. Even times like this, it was not difficult to see why Thasrus had taken her as his concubine.

  They stopped a league from the edge of the cliffs to wait for nightfall. They had only two hours, but everyone needed all the rest they could get. Tethering the sirrushes, it was decided Shaza would stay behind with Kurzik—who made sufficient protest—and Breida.

  No one seemed to have any idea of what to do with the northerner. Killing her was always an option, but no one besides Breida herself had actually suggested it.

  They could turn her loose or finish her off after Xeram was dead and Gilsazi freed. For now, they had larger concerns than the spitting captive.

  “I’m growing rather fond of you,” Shaza said in response to Breida’s latest plea for death. “You remind me of a pet jackal I had. You bite, never stop yapping, and have so many fleas I get hives just looking at you.”

  Breida cursed and spat. When Shaza smirked, she deflated. She even looked disappointed.

  Ashek went off by himself again, circling around the boulders until he was out of sight. No one followed him.

  Talitha thought about following him for less than a heartbeat, then shoved the thought away. At this point, he seemed as likely to skewer her as help her.

  Kasrei gnawed her nails. Her fingers were already a ruin and Talitha was reminded of those warrigals that chew off their own legs to escape traps.

  The ensaadi laid a hand on her friend’s shoulder. “We’ll get him back,” Talitha promised. “He’s survived worse than this. You know that.”

  Kasrei blinked up at her. “What will I tell the children if he doesn’t?”

  “It doesn’t matter because he will.” Talitha smiled. “Get some rest. You need to be at full strength.”

  Try as she might, Talitha couldn’t follow her own advice. Her mind kept bouncing from Gilsazi to Ashek to the traitor in Ilios and back to Ashek. A deep tiredness had settled in her body, yet she couldn’t rest.

  She wanted nothing more than for this to be over. Gilsazi would be returned home to his wife and children. Talitha could put Ashek behind her. She would return to Ilios and…everything would be exactly as it had been.

  Except now she had a traitor to hang. She only had to find a way to prove their guilt before her grandfather—the man who had never taken her side in anything.

  Talitha pulled her legs close, pressing her forehead against her knees. She would go back to being a failure, back to being the unwanted daughter in a long line of fighting men. Women had been warriors in Ilios since the days of the oceans drying and samahu forming. But sons were still preferable and Sargon had never let Talitha forget it. Why had she been born a woman?

  That thought brought an image of Ashek to her mind. Never in her life did she feel so much like a woman as when he had his arms around her—no.

  Talitha wrestled that thought out of her mind.

  When she got back, she would take control. She would make Shaza’s father see reason. She would be a good leader, a kind leader. She would find a way to make it work or die trying.

  Even as she thought that to herself, she could begin to see the latter was far more likely. As it was, going back to Ilios was almost a guarantee of early death.

  Between rebellious clans, usurpers, and traitors…perhaps she was not strong enough. Perhaps she was not harsh enough.

  She had never had a problem getting people to follow her when they knew her—Ashek, Shaza, Kasrei, Gilsazi, Zula, and plenty of others were perfect examples—but when she was a stranger?

  It wasn’t as if she could become friend to every person in a city of thousands. How could she possibly hope to win?

  Chapter Ten

  Talitha had thought she couldn’t sleep, but Shaza woke her after nightfall.

  Around them, the Dunedrifters were adjusting armor and checking weapons by moonlight. It was the hour of the night when the respectable went home and the disreputable came out to play.

  “You sure you can do this?” Shaza knelt before her, voice down. Even in the dark, it was impossible not to miss the intensity of his stare. “Not just being so exhausted…all of it.”

  Talitha offered a half hearted grin. Vain confidence had its uses. Clambering upright, she snatched her sword belt and checked the knives at her hip and thigh.

  She found Emalek and Kasrei speaking with one another, speech unintelligible. When Talitha approached, they both fell silent.

  “Are you ready?” Her voice came out coarse and scratchy with sleep.

  “You look like death.” Kasrei arched one brow. “Is it considered treason to leave my ensaadi behind in a raid?”

  “I�
�ll take that as a yes.” Talitha folded her arms across her chest. “Where is Ashek?”

  “We’ll be ready to move in a quarter hour.” The Dunedrifter was at her back as if she’d summoned him.

  Talitha spun around. Her lips parted to say something, but the words died in her throat.

  Ashek passed a coil of rope into her hands. “For the climb down.”

  Their group crept toward the cliff face quietly. Ashek’s Dunedrifters moved like shadows over the rocks. For such a motley group of men, this was one skill they all shared.

  It was a good reminder that they were a band of thieves, murderers, and vagabonds. Coming to the edge of the cliff face, Talitha unslung the rope from over her shoulder. Everyone lashed their ropes around a sufficient weight—a boulder, a firmly rooted tree, a jutting rock—and their group began to descend.

  “Remember.” Ashek looked over the entire group. “Wait for your comrades to join before we begin the fighting.”

  Kurzik and Shaza paced atop the cliff, checking ropes and watching for signs of unraveling. The rope chafed her hands, but she took her time backing down, choosing her footholds cautiously.

  The rocks were jagged and sharp. The boulders blocked a strong wind, but when their band ventured over the edge, it whipped against their backs. Talitha’s hair swirled in her face. A stronger wind picked up and began to howl.

  Kasrei had lived in a crag forest for years before Talitha had met her. The Dunedrifters had almost as much practice. Talitha herself had no such skill.

  She went slow, focusing on her task. There was nothing else for her to concern herself within until she reached the bottom.

  A rock slipped beneath Talitha’s foot and her whole body jerked. She grabbed hold of the rope with every bit of strength she had, even as it cut into her hands. A rain of pebbles skittered down from where her foot had been. She cursed herself.

  Talitha readjusted her grip. Inhaling, she tried again. She was more careful this time. Instead of watching the others, she focused on her own climb. Being the last one down might lose her some respect—but respect at the cost of her life wasn’t worth it.