by A Sick Frog
Yin Xu Dong clenched his teeth. Calm his ass! You think you can look down on people just cuz you’re an uncle? He plopped down in the seat across the uncle, “What is it you’re looking for me for?!”
“Frankly, you’re not really a good fit for her.” The uncle’s imposing gaze swept at Yin Xu Dong as he said slowly.
Not really a good fit my foot! Yin Xu Dong was so enraged he almost spat blood. Just as he was about to fork out his surgery scalpels and KO this strange uncle, “Fvck! Who the hell are you even? It’s none of your business if we match each other or not! Ohhh, I know, you’re here because you’re jealous huh? Didn’t manage to get what you wanted so you’re here to talk shit and be salty, do you think we’ll break up just because of the things you say? Uncle! You should just retire and enjoy the rest of your years while you can!”
The uncle shook his head. “Really don’t get why she’d chose to stay with you.”
His pitiful expression had Yin Xu Dong even madder. He wasn’t someone to take things as they were; he was after all a doctor-to-be who’d dictate life and death with the wielding of his surgical knives. Squinting, he smiling falsely: “That’s because she’s got good taste while you’re blinded by your eye crusts!” This blasted uncle, was he here to criticise him? He shouldn’t have came. If he were to make his exit now, he’d be seen as weak and useless, and he’d be throwing Xuan Xuan’s face, so he must go all-out, and shoo this uncle back to where he came from! And see if he’s got the guts again to come provoking him!
“Forget it, it’s her choice anyway. Lad, you get it stamped in your head to treat her good. The day you hurt her feelings will be the day of your doom.” The uncle stared at Yin Xu Dong sharply, his gaze brewing murderously.
Pity his murderous aura didn’t take much effect on Yin Xu Dong. Rather, Yin Xu Dong was completely pissed about this uncle words instead, the fvck! Who the hell did he think he was?! What’s with the righteousness tone in his words, it made things seem as though he was Xuan Xuan… guy?! He can go fvck himself!
“Uncle, I believe you (polite) might have gotten something wrong? I don’t think you (polite) a’re in the position to say that! Moreover, you can chop off that thought off yours, Xuan Xuan and I are going to be together till were old and grey, we’ll be coming to visit you again when we’re an old grandpa and an old grandma couple with out grandson, and great-grandson. Do you (polite) have another more to say? If not, I’ll be heading back, I still have to meet Xuan Xuan after this!” Yin Xu Dong sprouted the honorific “you”* one after another, humph, yes he’s out to piss this uncle off.
* the term used is 您老 = you (polite) old; basically referring to you (but politely) and making it known that the other party you’re speaking to is old (this is somewhat common when (grand)sons and (grand)daughters are talking to their elder (grand)parents)
“Nothing else, you can go.”
Yin Xu Dong left, a smile of victory adorning his lips. You Ming sat quietly where he was, watching Yin Xu Dong’s diminishing silhouette as he whispered: “Xiao Ye, I hope he’ll make you happy.”
When Yin Xu Dong saw Zhuo Xiao Xuan, he went up gleefully to give her a hug before giving her a kiss. Hehe, Xuan Xuan was his, and only his, that uncle, don’t you ever think of getting her from me.
Zhuo Xiao Xuan pushed away Yin Xu Dong’s head that was inching her way. Looking at that dumb smile on his face, she asked cooly: “What happened?”
“Nothing. Xuan Xuan, we’re graduating in a year.”
“Enh.”
“Let’s get married immediately after we graduate.”
“Enh.”
Chapter 69 - Side Story 1
* * *
Due to the peculiarity and confidentiality characteristic of her job, the marriage they agreed on immediately after graduation didn’t happen. However, there were always countermeasures one can put into place–a job Zhuo Xiao Xuan is beyond familiar with–to the policies in place.
Also owing to the specialness of her job, Zhuo Xiao Xuan appeared to be a normal citizen on the surface, so the Marriage Registration Office at the Ministry of Civil Affairs did not know she was the country’s secret agent. After bringing her passport with Yin Xu Dong’s to the Ministry of Civil Affairs, they spent nine bucks getting their cert.
By the time Zhuo lao ye’zi discovered that Zhuo Xiao Xuan’s documents he had crafted kept in the save disappeared into thin air, Zhuo Xiao Xuan was already on the way home with Yin Xu Dong to meet his parents.
His parents were completely flabbergasted with regards to the Yin Family’s new daughter-in-law. In the end, Papa Yin settled first and had his wife bring their brand new daughter-in-law back into the house, while he hooked an arm around his son, “Son, let’s talk.”
“Dad, you don’t need to say anything; the rice’s cooked*.” It was impossible for him to leave Xuan Xuan, they’ve already gotten married after all, he’s not going to divorce her!
* 生米煮成熟饭 = the rice’s been cooked; what’s been done cannot be undone; (often) used to hint that they did ahem ahem and there might be a bun in the oven.
Papa Yin faltered, this… there’s already a bun in the oven?! He was going to be a grandpa! Papa Yin was so shocked from the news his head spun for a moment. Though they say it’s good news he was going to be a grandpa, he was definitely glad, but the bomb his son just dropped was a little out of the way!
Papa Yin later went to talk with Mama Yin in the room. By the time they returned to the living room, the gazes they gave Zhuo Xiao Xuan, and especially at her stomach, was entirely different; it made Zhuo Xiao Xuan extremely ill at ease.
“Wife, go out and get some nourishing food and make a soup or something. Papa Yin happily instructed Mama Yin.
“A’ight! Son… daughter, wait for me hah!” Mama Yin immediately rushed to the market with her grocery bag.
Yin Xu Dong and Zhuo Xiao Xuan sat staring at each other.
Zhuo Xiao Xuan’s phone suddenly rang. The moment she picked it up, Zhuo lao ye’zi’s thunderous voice almost burst her eardrums, “Zhuo Xiao Xuan! Get your ass back immediately!”
Zhuo Xiao Xuan moved the phone away from her ear, before saying slowly: “I’m not returning to the Zhuo Mansion in the future, you can do whatever you want with the things in my room. Oh, and, I’ll send you (polite) the wedding invite in two days. You can come if you want. That’s it, I’m hanging up.” After that, she hung up, rejecting Zhuo lao ye’zi’s high-decibel bellows from shattering her ears.
Papa Yin and Mama Yin felt that they had to get the wedding over with before her stomach showed, so they quickly started the wedding preparations at the couple’s silent agreement.
The newly-weds wholly entrusted their wedding prep to Papa and Mama Yin other than matters regarding their gowns, which Zhuo Xiao Xuan insisted be oriental. Though Yin Xu Dong really wanted to see how Zhuo Xiao Xuan would look in a wedding gown, as a twenty-fourth-century husband and a wife-con in the socialist society, he shall of course obey all of his waifu’s demands, his waifu’s words was the law!
When Papa and Mama Yin finally found time off after knocking out all the arrangements, they realised they still had not met their in-laws! Upon asking their son, they found out that their daughter-in-law didn’t have parents. At that, they felt their heart going out for their daughter-in-law.
Yin Xu Dong asked when he found an opportunity: “Waifu, you really don’t plan on telling mom and dad?”
“There’s no need.” If she were to let word out that she was still alive, it’ll be adding oil to fire. The Z organisation would probably send someone to finish her off even.
“Alright then, I’ll invite them to our wedding under my name then, as their parents, they should at least attend their daughter’s wedding.” Having understood where Zhuo Xiao Xuan was coming from, Yin Xu Dong suggested.
“Up to you.”
And so, he invited them.
The wedding went on as planned. Zhuo lao ye’zi, along with some others, attend
ed with a dark expression. There wasn’t anything he could say seeing how things were at the moment; it’s not like he could force them to divorce could he. On top of that, he was the one who curated Zhuo Xiao Xuan’s identity to begin with, if he were to force them to divorce, and they’d counter him with desperate measures and stay together even after being divorced, he still couldn’t do anything about it.
However, the one thing he did start to consider was whether he should allow the lass to remain in Z organisation. Seeing how sentimental she’s getting, it was possible she might make a misstep owing to her emotions.
As Zhuo Xiao Xuan did not have parents, Yin Xu Dong managed to get his neighbours, the Qin family, to escort the bride after much instigation and persuasion. The Qin couple and Zhuo Xiao Xuan were both fine with the arrangement. Qin Peng Cheng on the other hand was largely against it.
The little shota pouted as he waited for the woman who would stay in his jie jie’s room. Pity no matter how much he glared, she would still ignore his existence. At that, he stomped away in anger.
Before day broke the next day, a bunch of ladies rushed into Zhuo Xiao Xuan’s room and buzzed around helping her do her hair and makeup. The girls were Zhuo Xiao Xuan’s dormmates from college, and the few of her “BFF”s. Zhuo Xiao Xuan had casually mentioned that she was getting married previously. After which, the four of them fought to become Zhuo Xiao Xuan’s bridesmaid, topping it off with their identity as Zhuo Xiao Xuan’s four years’ worth of a dormmate. Zhuo Xiao Xuan honestly didn’t mind much, so with a wave of her hand, all four of them became her bridesmaid.
Hence in the “Boudoir”, the several girls chirped about happily. Only Zhuo Xiao Xuan wore her gown expressionlessly before sitting before the dresser, allowing them to make her up.
One of them was unhappy with her expression: “Xiao Xuan, though all of us know that you desperately lack facial muscles, but at least give us a smile today, it’s your big day today!”
“Exactly, exactly, c’mere, learn from this jie jie, chee…se, chee…se, stop, yes, that’s it, maintain that!”
“Oi, are you sure this is a smile? Why’s it uglier than you crying?”
“What do you know, girls are supposed to cry on their big day!”
“…”
Zhuo Xia Xuan relaxed her taut facial muscles, beyond helpless as well. Inviting them over was one of the few mistakes she made.
Time flew by and before long, the groom brought his gang of friends over to escort the bride. Of course they were blocked at the entrance by the bridesmaid, not allowed in.
“Oi, Mr Groom, let’s hear a love song first!” Bridesmaid one was the first to make things difficult for him.
Yin Xu Dong sang the ballad he prepared; come at me with your tricks, he’s prepared everything for today!
Yin Xu Dong was as though a fierce tiger charging down the mountain—he passed the four of five stations with ease. When he reached the last one, the last bridesmaid wiped her perspiration. Her eyes suddenly it when an idea came to her, and so, she asked: “Mr Groom, when did the bride say “I love you” to you?”
Yin Xu dong paused, this phrase… Xuan Xuan’s never said it to him before! What’s he gonna do!?
When the bridesmaid saw his difficulty with the question, they couldn’t help but laugh: “No way? The bride didn’t say I love you to Mr Groom before? Or could it be that Mr Groom has forgotten? That won’t do, you can’t whisk away out bride if you don’t answer this question!”
Yin Xu Dong’s expression fell. He’s passed all the previous questions, how could he possibly get stuck here? Just when he was beside himself with worry, He Yi handed him a phone from behind and whispered into his ears: “The bride’s here to save the day.”
Yin Xu Dong immediately placed the phone by his ear in elation, and heard Zhuo Xiao Xuan’s clear voice from the other side. “Increase the volume of your phone.”
Yin Xu Dong did as she said before he heard Zhuo Xia Xuan saying: “Yin Xu Dong, I love you!” Though her voice was not the least gentle—it didn’t sound like a confession, more of a reprimanding rather—but everyone heard her sincerity.
The bridesmaid muttered, unsatisfied, “What an uncooperative* bride! How can she let the groom pass so blatantly! This is too much!”
*胳膊往里拐 = elbows turning in; covering for insiders
Zhuo Xiao Xuan pulled open the door and walked out, saying blandly: “My elbows are supposed to turn in any way.” At that, she stretched to hand to let Yin Xu Dong hook it.
The bridesmaid minced their lips, but reverted to clustering around the bride and groom excitedly as they went down.
Just as Yin Xu Dong was about to turn around happily, he saw Qin Peng Cheng hiding in the corner peeking at them. When Qin Peng Cheng’s reddened eyes met Yin Xu Dong’s, he immediately shrunk back in shock.
Yin Xu Dong smiled as he said to everyone, “Everyone, can I have a minute, I have something I need to settle.” At that, he walked over to the corner under everyone’s dubious gazes. Though everyone wanted to ask why he’d dump his bride aside, making her wait for him, they didn’t say anything when they saw the bride’s calm in response to his actions.
“Xiao Cheng.”
Qin Peng Cheng raised his head to look at him before lowering it back down as he kicked a corner. His voice was aggrieved: “If my jie jie’s still alive, will it be my jie jie that’ll be marrying you today?”
“Does Xiao Cheng really think that? If so, then you can try thinking her as your jie jie.”
“…but, she’s not my jie jie at all.”
“Eh, look carefully and you’ll realise that other than a different face, she’s exactly the same as your jie jie.” Yin Xu Dong winked at the confused Qin Peng Cheng, “This is our secret, don’t tell anyone else, including your mom and dad.”
Qin Peng Cheng was still muddled. Yin Xu Dong patted his head, beaming before he left. “It’s fine, just have fun here, don’t overthink.”
Though the bride maintained her chilly expression throughout the entire wedding ceremony, everyone else’s enthusiasm was not the least doused; the festive uproar lasted an entire day.
At nightfall, the younger ones collectively made a ruckus about their night of the wedding that would follow. They quickly realised though that they were cold-shouldered. However, they were not going to let the couple go so easily. And so they thumped without qualms on the door, shouting that if the couple didn’t come out, they’d slam through the door.
After they thumped and bumped at the room, the door creaked open and out walked a person.
Everyone said in disdain: “Dong’zi that ass, how could he allow his bride to entertain us!”
Zhuo Xiao Xuan didn’t pay mind to that. Instead, he looked at the over-excited mass coldly, asking: “Are you not leaving!”
“No can do! We’re definitely gonna make the bridal chamber ruckus!”
“You sure you guys are not going to leave?”
“Yes!”
“Then don’t mind me.” Zhuo Xiao Xuan pulled her weapon out from behind—a gun.
Everyone stared at the toy water gun in Zhuo Xiao Xuan’s hands, dazed. What’s she gonna do? Everyone’s confused was quickly resolved by Zhuo Xiao Xuan; she aimed the gun at the frontmost person and shot at them. The person in front touched the sticky liquid on them. When he gave it a sniff, he almost fainted. Fvck it! It’s rotten eggs!
The people in front that were shot by the rotten egg liquids gagged before they dashed off. The people at the back at witnessing the commotion too hurried down the stairs.
You want to escape? As if I’d like you! Zhuo Xiao Xuan snorted coldly before flipping off the staircase railings. Turning around to face the stairs, she slid off the railings, the toy water gun in her hand aiming and shooting at the people dashing down the stairs continuously without missing out anyone. Before long, everyone’s clothes were somewhat stained.
At that, everyone immediately stunk. They gazed at each other, speechless. This
was the first them things turned the table so badly for them while trying to embarrass the newlyweds.
Zhuo Xiao Xuan kept her water gun and stood on the railing, her majestic expression as though looking down on the entire world, saying: “There’s some flower sprinklers in the courtyard, you can wash off it off there and head into the guest rooms for a change of clothes. There’s a room each of the males and females, and there’s towels and a set of clothes for everyone. Settle things yourselves if there isn’t enough.” After finishing, she abandoned the frozen masses and strolled up the stairs to the second floor. Before entering her room, she turned around again and gave a rare smile as she reminded everyone, “Oh, there’s still a lot more things I’ve prepared that I haven’t put to use, everyone’s welcome to try again.”
At that, realisation dawned. Damnit she’s all prepped to go up against them, not that they had much courage left to go against her again.
When Zhuo Xiao Xuan returned to their room, Yin Xu Dong just came out of the showers. When he didn’t hear the ruckus from outside, he asked Zhuo Xiao Xuan, wondering: “Wifey, where’s everyone? What happened to the commotion?”
“They said they were tired so they went back to wash up and sleep.” Zhuo Xiao Xuan lied without even blinking. But honestly, she wasn’t really lying per say, they really did went back to wash up. She didn’t care when they did the sleeping part of the “wash up and sleep”.
Zhuo Xiao Xuan went to the bathroom to take off her gown and bathe, before returning to their room in a bathrobe.
“Wifey?”
“Enh?”
“Are you thirsty? Drink some water.” Yin Xu Dong poured some water for Zhuo Xiao Xuan eagerly.
“Oh.”
“Are you tired? Want me to give you a massage?”
“Enh.” Honestly, she wasn’t very tired, but when she saw Yin Xu Dong’s eyes dazzling with anticipation, she nodded her head.
Yin Xu Dong had Zhuo Xiao Xuan lie on the bed in excitement while he rubbed her elbow and massaged her shoulder, stealing a few kisses while he was at it.