“Granny, I’m so sorry,” Ditty exclaimed, lowering her broom. “What with all the goings on in Fuchsia the last couple of days, I’m a little skittish.”
Granny lowered her umbrella. “Well, I hooked those crooks, and you’re safe now. Just got lucky being a little old lady and all. Who would have thought I would remember long enough to solve the crime?”
“Granny, I’m one of the merchants remember? Or perhaps you don’t. You work for us. We know your secret. But we’ve all been instructed not to let the cat out of the bag that you are our undercover person for spotting shoplifters and crooks. The police and the Big guy are telling everyone that you were in the right place at the right time and got lucky.”
“That’s good. I was worried I’d be out of a job. How’d you hear that? I just saw the Big Guy and he didn’t say anything.”
“Well, Granny, did you forget? Sally was murdered. I‘m sure he’s got other things on his mind. But don’t you remember? You were there?”
“There? Where? Sally wasn’t murdered, she died, had a heart attack or something. Quit spreading rumors Ditty!”
Granny turned and stomped back in the direction she had come from. Murdered? Sally wasn’t murdered. Or was she? What weren’t they telling her?
Granny picked up the pace, practically sprinting past Ella’s Enchanted Forest, until she remembered she was supposed to be old so she slowed her step and kept on walking. She walked right past AbStract and on down the street toward home. Home was about a mile away so it wasn’t far on the days Granny decided to walk to town.
She was careful not to step on the cracks in the sidewalk. She couldn’t get the nursery ditty out of her mind. Step on the cracks, you break your mother’s back. Something like that was hard to forget, so no matter how old she was, she always avoided the cracks. Granny also noticed that leaves were starting to fall from the trees. Summer was over. She had been so busy, caught up in the goings on of the crooks and the underground streets that she had failed to notice the time passing and fall arriving.
As Granny got closer to her house, she saw something strange wiggling by her front door. Slowly and cautiously, she climbed the front steps to her house. A loud howl made her jump. Baskerville had tried to get into the house through the pet door and was stuck.
“I knew I needed to make that door bigger for you, Baskerville,” Granny said to the hound as she leaned down to see what she could do to get him unstuck. Granny slid her slim arms around his backside and gave a tug. Even though she was tiny, Granny had muscles. She lifted weights so she would be a match if the bad guys ever got physical.
“Baskerville, I think we need some help from the garage; be patient.” Granny turned back down the steps and headed for her garage. Baskerville gave a low moan as if to say, “I trust you, Granny.” Granny thought that it was nice to have at least one creature trusting her. It was a good thing the other shysters didn’t seem to be around or the racket would have woke the dead and since the cemetery was right behind her house, well, who knew what ghosts lingered there?
As Granny opened the door to the garage, she had a vague feeling that she had forgot something, but she couldn’t quite put her finger on it. Once inside the garage, she looked around for something greasy to grease down Baskerville. As she scoped out her garage, she realized what she had forgotten. There was only one red ‘57 Chevy in the garage. She had forgotten that she had driven downtown this morning and now her car was stranded on Main Street.
“Well, I’ll just drive my other car downtown to get it when I get Baskerville unstuck,” she thought absentmindedly. Granny walked over to her workbench and started tossing the items on top of it to and fro. Finally at the bottom of the pile she came upon just the thing––Vaseline. Cooking oil would have been much better, but because Baskerville was stuck in the door, she couldn’t get in the front door. Before she had left home she had moved her cedar chest, that she kept by the back door for boots and mittens, in front of the door so she could climb on it and reach the hidden key for the secret door in the basement, in case she needed to come home that way. Getting in the back door was out of the question because she had forgotten to put the chest back in its rightful place and it still blocked the door. If she used the hidden basement door she would have to go back downtown, wind through the underground streets and get in that way. She wasn’t sure Baskerville could last that long.
For a second, she picked up the WD-40 but put it back down. Toxic chemicals would not be good for Baskerville. Granny picked up the Vaseline, hurried back to her porch, talked soothingly to Baskerville while she rubbed him down with Vaseline. Then she gave a good count. “One, Two, Three.” One shove and Baskerville was through the door, Vaseline and all.
Granny turned to see if she had left a towel on the porch when she was watering her plants to clean her hands so she could get the doorknob open. She would have to teach Baskerville how to open the door. As Granny turned, she noticed her potted Fuchsia plant. It had a knitting needle stuck deep in the soil skewered to a note attached. It sounded ominous:
“Don’t needle me any more, Granny. I won’t be responsible for my actions.” It was signed Franklin.
Granny picked up the knitting needle and eyed it suspiciously before she proceeded into her house. She had had enough hoopla for the day but she still had to rescue her car from Main Street before anyone realized that she had forgotten it and she had to clean off the Vaseline from Baskerville before he greased everything in her house and before he licked it off of himself and got sick.
Granny sat down and flipped open her laptop computer and headed straight to etellme.com. Ooh, this is going to get messy, Granny thought. First she was supposed to cover his fur with a large layer of liquid dish detergent, then dampen a soft cloth with water, then wipe off the dish detergent with the soft, wet cloth and keep repeating the steps until the greasiness was gone.
Granny thought maybe she had picked the wrong item to use to squeeze Baskerville through the door. How in the world was she going to get him to sit long enough to do that? She needed to think, but fast.
Granny dug in her refrigerator and brought out the big steak that her kids had left her last time they had visited. She led Baskerville to her Jacuzzi tub in the bathroom because it also had one of those doohickey nozzles that moved. She coaxed Baskerville into the tub with the steak and put the steak by the farthest wall of the tub. As Baskerville was nibbling on the steak Granny doused him with dish detergent and started rubbing his fur with the soft wet cloth. She had started to rinse him off with the doohickey when a loud pounding on the door began. Baskerville jumped at the same time as Granny jumped, making them collide in midair. Granny toppled in the tub on top of Baskerville and the doohickey nozzle Granny had been holding slipped out of Granny’s hands, became uncontrollable, and started spraying them and the bathroom. It was a snake striking anyone that got in its way.
Just at that moment, the door opened. Granny looked up to see three mouths wide open in shock and three sets of eyes that mimicked owl eyes trying to see at night. Her kids were here.
CHAPTER FIVE
Penelope, Granny’s older daughter, ran to the tub and grabbed Granny. Thor, Granny’s son, ran and grabbed Baskerville. Starshine, Granny’s middle child, grabbed a towel and hopped up and down on her two feet, not sure what to do with the towel.
“Grab him, Thor,” Penelope shouted, “before he attacks mom anymore.” At the same time, she jumped in the tub and put herself between Granny and the big dog.
Baskerville, startled by this rude interruption started howling a howl that would bring a city to its knees if he were outside. Thor tried to get a firm grip on Baskerville’s collar but his hands kept slipping off. Thor then tried to get his arms around Baskerville’s big neck but his grasp kept slipping off of Baskerville’s greasy neck. Baskerville, having had enough of this and being scared for his life, jumped out of the tub and ran out the door grabbing the towel that Starshine held in her hands, knocking Starshine down i
n the process.
“What are you doing?” Granny yelled in a loud voice. “Unhand me, Penelope!” Granny lifted up her arms and lifted her feet, sparkly tennis shoes and all and hauled herself out of the tub, stepping over the shocked Starshine, and tromped down the hall trying to catch Baskerville.
It took Penelope and Thor a moment to shake and dry themselves off and follow Granny down the hall, a trail of water puddling on the floor from their soggy clothes, so that when Starshine started to follow, hopping from anxiety, her hopping feet made splashes on the wall.
Granny was first to the front door where Baskerville was again stuck in the doggy door trying to escape the madness in the house. “Now look what you’ve done!” Granny proclaimed to her children. As Granny turned to confront them she caught a glimpse of Fish, Little White Poodle, Tank and Furball hiding behind the couch waiting to make their getaway to hide under Granny’s bed until her children were gone. The shysters knew her children didn’t know about them so they always hid when her family decided to visit.
“Now look what you’ve done. He’s stuck again.”
“What is that monster and why is he here?” Penelope asked.
“You know all that hoopla last night that was reported in the news? The one where we caught some crooks and I accidently got involved? Well, his owner was arrested and the crooks’ dog likes me and I like him. And all of you always worry about me being safe so I thought he would be good protection.” Granny explained innocently.
At that moment, Baskerville, tired of being stuck in the door gave out a huge howl.
Thor, grabbed the towel that Baskerville had grabbed from Starshine, which was now hanging from Baskerville’s tail and used it to keep himself from sliding off of Baskerville’s Vaseline greased body so he could pull Baskerville out of the door. Baskerville immediately ran over to Starshine and jumped up hugging her shoulders and licking her face.
“He loves me. Oh,” Starshine said with a smitten grin on her face.
“What are all of you doing here, scaring me to death?”
Penelope, Thor and Starshine all gave a sigh at the same time. “Sit down, Mom,” Starshine instructed her mother. “We’ve come to talk to you about something. And it seems this conversation is taking place none too soon.”
Penelope sat Granny down in her chair and took her hand. “You know we worry about you, Mom. You could have been killed last night. You know we have been concerned you shouldn’t be living alone.”
Thor knelt down beside Granny, Starshine followed his lead, kneeling on the other side of Granny and taking her other hand. Baskerville, not wanting to be left out, put his paws on the chair cushion behind her head. The shysters hiding behind the couch decided it would be a good time to hide under Granny’s bed. They silently crept away to Granny’s bedroom unnoticed.
Granny looked at her children suspiciously. With two of them down on their knees and taking her hands, Granny thought it looked as if they were going to propose to her. “What is this all about?”
“We were concerned last night when we heard what happened but we wanted to wait until today to talk to you and then we heard about Sally’s murder,” Penelope continued on not noticing the change in Granny’s face as the word murder settled in Granny’s brain. “I want you to come and live with me. My kids have left home, Butch is at work all the time and we can take care of you. We’ve talked it over and it’s live with me or the assisted living or the nursing home.”
Granny knew she should have been concerned about the word nursing home and assisted living; she always knew they wanted her in the wrinkle farm but the only thing that registered in Granny’s head was the word murder.
“Who told you Sally was murdered? I was there, the weeds quit talking to her. Maybe she had a heart attack?”
Propose? They were going to propose all right, propose Granny go to the wrinkle farm. Granny thought as she pulled her hands out of their grasp.
“We’ll talk about that later, maybe you should rest. We are going to stay awhile to make sure you are ok and then we will make plans.” Starshine gently suggested as she turned and hugged Baskerville.
“And we need to make arrangements for this monster,” Penelope decided.
Granny, quickly putting together a plan in her mind, suggested, “Why don’t you see what you can find to eat? I am really tired and weak. I am going to rest in the basement in front of the TV. Just give me some time to get my strength back after these nightmare couple of days and we’ll talk.”
Granny quickly walked to the basement steps. “Don’t disturb me for two hours. That should be enough time to recuperate.” Granny winked and headed down the steps.
At the bottom of the stairs, Granny paused to listen. The kids were digging into the fridge and commenting on the food Granny had stashed. She knew when they left, she was going to have to go on a shopping trip because they would have replaced the chocolate, ice cream and the donuts with some sort of weird healthy food unless they decided to cart her away first.
Granny quickly and quietly moved to the fireplace. She ran her hand inside the fireplace and found the latch for the secret door that she had found during her previous investigation which led to the streets underneath Fuchsia. There was no time like the present to go downtown and retrieve her car that she had forgotten. The latch opened and she stepped into the secret room, being careful to shut the secret fireplace door behind her. Her kids didn’t know about that door yet because they hadn’t heard all of the details of yesterday’s ruckus. Granny hurried across the room and headed through the door to the underground streets.
CHAPTER SIX
The underground street lamps were still on. The Mayor and City Council of Fuchsia hadn’t turned off the lights after the crooks had been caught.
Granny proceeded in the direction of Ella’s Enchanted Forest. She found the lift switch for the large elevator lift, got on the floor and rode it up into Ella’s.
Delight had been in the process of closing the shop when she heard the lift in the Forest Room being activated. When Granny and the lift became even with the floor, Granny saw a large flower pot being ready to be lowered on her head.
“Delight, it’s me,” Granny yelled as she held the umbrella that she had thought to grab before she had retreated to her downstairs, up, to ward off the flower pot.
“Goodness gracious, Granny, what are you doing here?”
“It’s a long story. Don’t have time to explain. Don’t tell anyone you saw me.” With that Granny proceeded to the front door before Delight had a chance to lower the flower pot from over her head in striking pose.
Granny’s car was still parked in the same spot where she had left it in the morning. Granny hopped in her car and slowly drove down the street so as to not draw attention to herself. As she drove, Granny came up with an idea.
Franklin’s car was parked in his driveway. Granny grabbed her umbrella and exited the car, taking her time and being a little clumsy getting out. She walked slowly as she shuffled up the sidewalk, giving up a silent prayer because she was shuffling on the cracks, but she had to make it look like she was in need of help in case Franklin was watching from the window.
Granny gave a feeble knock on Franklin’s door. There was no answer. She knew he was inside. “Franklin, open up; it’s Granny.”
“This is Itsy; there’s no one home.”
“Franklin, you have to open the door; this is important.”
The door opened a crack and Franklin stuck his head out the door. “What part of the knitting needle skewered into a note that told you to not needle me anymore didn’t you understand?” Franklin asked with an ominous tone as he started to shut the door.
Granny was quick with her umbrella and wedged it in the doorway so the door would not shut.
“It’s Itsy and Bitsy; they’re in trouble and they need you.”
Franklin opened the door a little wider. “I thought they were Furball and Tank?” Franklin asked suspiciously.
“T
hey are, they are, but I’m so rattled and I don’t know what to do. They are stuck in my house.” Technically Granny thought that was true because they were hiding so Granny’s children didn’t see them. “And I can’t get them out. You should hear the ruckus.” Granny didn’t tell him the ruckus was from Baskerville being stuck in the door, another small technicality.
The door opened wider. “How did they get stuck? Why did you leave them? Why didn’t you call me?”
“They aren’t in danger; they just can’t get out of a tight spot and my cell phone wasn’t charged, and I was so rattled, I didn’t think to use my regular phone. You’ve got to help them, Franklin.”
Franklin gave Granny a stern look and tried to judge whether this was another of Granny’s antics but he didn’t want to take the chance that Itsy and Bitsy really were in trouble.
Granny jumped in her red ‘57 Chevy Corvette, revved its engine and sped down the street. Franklin, not wanting to let Granny get the best of his black Corvette, kept up with Granny, curbing his instinct to try and pass her and beat her to her house.
When Granny pulled into her garage, her children were on the front porch of her house having an animated discussion. When they saw Granny, they ran down the steps, Baskerville at their heels.
Starshine and Penelope were both chattering so fast and making so many gestures Granny thought their heads were going to spin off of their bodies. Thor on the other hand was standing by, too calm for Granny’s liking.
At that moment, Franklin walked up to the anxious group. Granny quickly grabbed his arm and dragged him close to her daughters. She looked at Baskerville and gave a command, “Howl, Baskerville, howl!”
Baskerville let out a blood curdling howl that Granny was sure would wake the dead in the cemetery behind her house. She saw Mavis look out her window pretending to be Marilyn Monroe in one of her reality show fantasies. Was that George in the window too with a Clark Gable wig and mustache?
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