Calico Descending

by Keri Lake

  She threads her hands in mine and gives a squeeze. “Then we better make sure that doesn’t happen.”

  I lie on my side, staring at what would be the wall, if I could see past the blackness. Only in Valdys’s room do I get a small bit of light from the corridor at night, but I wasn’t permitted to sleep with him tonight. I haven’t seen him since I left his cell this morning, and the ache in my chest tells me I’ve reached a dangerous attachment to him, and I know all too well what it feels like when those attachments are severed.

  The thin blanket covering my lower half lifts from behind, and Roz’s warm body slides into bed, next to mine. Sometimes, when I come back from the lab, restless and moaning in my sleep, she crawls in bed to settle me like this. Sometimes, she just needs the contact, and we lie here, whispering in the dark about things girls think about late at night.

  “Tomorrow night.” Her lips are at my ear, her voice low and soft. “They’re transporting cages to some … facility in the north. Trucks leave at midnight.”

  I turn slightly and frown. “What cages?”

  “Kenny just said they’re big steel boxes that were loaded onto the dock earlier today.”

  Jesus. The mutations. They’re taking them to another facility. I didn’t even know another facility existed, which means something is in the works for those things, and I’m certain if it was death, they’d have killed the mutations by now.

  “Kenny can interrupt the tracker on Valdys’s throat until you’re out of range. Only a couple of hours, though, between rounds to the Alpha wing.”

  I try to imagine how far we’ll need to be, not to be picked up by their trackers. Far enough to feel like freedom, I think. “That should be enough time. And the cameras?”

  “He’s set aside footage of the cell from the other night. Of you and Valdys together. Which means you have to find a way to earn another night with him. He couldn’t have your prints set to open Valdys’s door, but there is an override to the lock. He can open it remotely. It just takes an extra person to flip the switch from the Alpha wing to keep the alarms from going off.”

  With a huff, I curl my lip between my teeth and nibble on it, as I do when I’m feeling a bit stressed. “I can ask Medusa.”

  “She’ll never agree. She’s acted like a beaten puppy since they took her hand.” The pause of silence in between is followed by a sigh. “I’ll do it. I can sneak out to flip the switch, and be back in bed within a half hour. No one will know.”

  “You’re not coming with me?”

  A long pause follows, and she burrows her face into the back of my neck. “I don’t know yet. I just have a bad feeling about it. About what’s out there.”

  “Then, I can’t ask you to do this. You’ve already done so much, asking for Kenny’s help.”

  “It’s no big deal. If it means more time with Kenny’s cock, I’ll do it.”

  In the darkness, I roll my eyes, and snort. “You’re obsessed with the thing.”

  “Truly. If I could have one of my own, I wouldn’t even need Kenny.” Her hips nudge me from behind, slamming into my backside, and I chuckle.

  “You’re terrible.”

  “Terribly amazing, you mean.”

  I draw her hands around me, tucking them against me, as she nuzzles closer. “I’d have never made it here without you, Roz. After Bryani, I just … I was lost.”

  “I’d have never made it without you, either. I’m going to miss you.”

  “Please come with me?”

  There’s a long beat of silence that follows, one I hope is filled with her considering the proposition. “I’ll think about it,” she whispers against my neck. “Go to sleep. Tomorrow will be the longest night, and you need your rest.”

  Though I know she can’t see me, I nod. And for the first time, I close my eyes with a glimmer of hope.

  Chapter 27

  I have one objective: to earn another night with Valdys. So, when Doctor Ericsson tells me he has a job for me, as he sits across the desk, sipping what smells like liquor, judging by the potent smell on the air, I give a solemn nod. Enough to keep him from getting too suspicious of my behaviors, but compliant, as if I’ve learned my lesson.

  I can feel his eyes on me, studying me now, while I stare down at my hands in my lap. Can he possibly see the glow inside me? Is the promise of escape written on my skin?

  “I haven’t even told you what the job is yet.”

  “Do I have a choice?” It’s not easy to feign defeat, when every cell in my body is screaming of impending victory.

  “No. No you don’t.” He sets the glass down, and I watch as the amber fluid dances around the rim. “I watched the two of you the other night.”

  If I didn’t have an awareness that he prefers young boys, based on some of the stories I’ve heard, I’d almost think he enjoyed watching them. “Seems you and Valdys are enjoying your time together, as of late. That’s good. The more attached he becomes, the better behaved he is.”

  “How wonderful for you.”

  “Indeed. As the rebels become bolder, so becomes our duty to prepare for an attack. The cooperation of our Alphas is crucial.”

  Something tells me the job he wants me to perform is going to go against the remaining shreds of my dignity. Why else would he feel compelled to remind me of this?

  The objective is a night with Valdys. No matter what.

  “I’ve decided to do a test run into the tunnels.” His words hit like an arrow to my gut, the dreadful poison oozing into my bloodstream. “Not with Valdys. Relax.”

  I blow out a shaky breath, to calm my nerves, but there is no relaxing. Not in this place, nor in the presence of this man.

  “I’m going to send Cadmus. He’s the fastest of the three. Nearly as strong as Valdys. And arrogant enough to value his life.”

  “I didn’t realize placing value on one’s life was considered arrogant.”

  “It is when you’re trained to value the life of your masters over your own.”

  I gulp down the smart comment cocked at the back of my throat and remember my sole objective in this meeting.

  “Regardless of that, Cadmus tends to be unpredictable. It’s maddening at times. We expect he’ll go left, and he goes right. As it’s been the case with you, in your last few encounters. Who would’ve thought that an Alpha, one as sexually charged as Cadmus, would’ve rejected a female in estrus.” He shrugs and shakes his head. “Completely unpredictable.”

  “Is it? You said yourself he values his life.”

  A chuckle escapes Doctor Ericsson--a strange, unappealing sound that skates down my spine like a blade along my nerves.

  “You’re feisty. This is why Valdys is so smitten with you. Which brings me back to the task I need you to perform. I’d like you to spend this evening with Cadmus. Even if he doesn’t find you sexually appealing, the fact is, he hasn’t killed you, which leads me to believe, he might enjoy your company before he heads down into the tunnels.

  A cold numb sensation settles over my chest, but my palms are sweating. “Cadmus hates me. Its clear. He’s hated me from the beginning.”

  “That’s where I think he might surprise you, my dear. I understand it’s Valdys you’ve grown attached to, but I think Cadmus would benefit most from your attention this evening.”

  “Haven’t we proven already that Cadmus doesn’t give a damn about me? If you think spending a night with me is going to keep him from committing Alpha suicide down there, you’re wrong. Give him Neela. Quit forcing her to suffer, and let her provide the comfort he’s looking for.”

  “Doctor Tims informs me that Neela is almost through her cycle. Her episodes have decreased to only a few a day, but we’d like to see it through.” He’s not telling me this as an excuse, or to provide explanation, because in the end, whether I like it, or not, he’s sending me into that cell tonight. Neela is a reminder that everything they do in this place is strictly for their own gain and no one else’s.

  “You will stay with Cadmus,
comfort him. Entertain him. Remind him of the reward that awaits him upon his return.”

  “What do you mean, reward?” Scowling, I shake my head. “I belong to Valdys. He’s my Champion.”

  “You belong to me, girl, and no one else.” He lets out a mirthless laugh. “Do you think you’re here to fall in love? Do you think this is some matchmaking fairytale we’re operating here? It’s science! And you’re nothing but a variable. We will use you however we see fit. If that means you become some experimental whore for the sake of our studies, then that’s what you’ll become.”

  My chest twitches with the urge to break down and cry, and the tears in my eyes only add frustration to my slowly shrinking pride.

  “As a reward, I’ll gift you a night with Valdys tomorrow. He’ll be pleased, as he’s already asked about you twice today.”

  “Can I see him? Before, I mean.”

  “I don’t think that’s a good idea. In the event you mention this evening, it might upset him.”

  “I won’t. I promise I won’t. I just want to see him.”

  Lips pressed together, he shakes his head. “I’m afraid not. Guards are outside the door, waiting to escort you down. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I have some preparation for before tomorrow’s excursion.”

  “Doctor Ericsson, I--”

  He lifts his hand, eyes blazing with irritation. “That will be all.”

  A numbness settles over me, as I curl my fingers around the arms of the chair. A long and slender piece of metal I’ve often seen him use to open sealed envelopes catches my eye, where it sits in front of me, on his desk. The pointed end of it could easily puncture his throat. I’d watch with macabre fascination as he bled all over his desk, and what then? The guards outside wouldn’t hesitate to shoot me for killing a doctor. By week’s end, the blood would be wiped away, and a new doctor would take his place. Perhaps one more sadistic. Or not. The only certainty is that Alpha Project would go on, and Valdys will remain locked in his cell alone.

  “You’re dismissed.” Doctor Ericsson’s words break my thoughts, and I push up from the chair, my legs feeling heavier than when I entered the room.

  “Oh, one more thing.” His voice brings my footsteps to a halt, but I don’t bother to turn around and give him the satisfaction of seeing the tears in my eyes. “Just … judging by the tapes I’ve watched over the last couple of months. Cadmus is a bit more on the rough side. He seems to enjoy a bit of chase, so I suppose I should inform you that the guards have been advised not to intervene if they hear you scream. As for you, it’s best to just go along with it. Until it passes. Fewer stitches in the end, and all that.”

  Eyes closed, I feel the tears spill down my cheeks, and I keep on toward the door. When I open the door, four Legion officers stand waiting for me.

  Darkness swallows me, and when the door clicks behind me, I can’t help the flinching of my muscles. The same fear I felt the first day in Valdys’s room, but exacerbated by the fact that I know Cadmus hates everything about me.

  “Here we are again.” His voice emerges from the shadows, carrying the kind of spiteful sarcasm I expected. “Had I known I was going to be shipped off to Ragerland, I’d have just fucked you a long time ago.”

  My hands tremble at my side, my voice caught behind the tight squeeze of my chest.

  “I would’ve been gentle the first time. But now I know you can take it. I’m sure Valdys stretched you nice and wide.”

  “You don’t have to do this, Cadmus.”

  “You’re right. I don’t have to. That’s what makes it exciting.” He steps into the light, and I’m suddenly reminded how big and imposing he is. “Everything about this is based on my will to fuck you, or not. And considering fucking you is all I’ve thought about, I’d say the odds are not in your favor.”

  “This is what they want. They want you to use me, so that they can control you.”

  “Blah, blah, blah.” He waves his hand in dismissal, edging closer. “And at the end of the day, they’re still going to send me down into that hellhole like a worm hooked on a line. So, why not have a little fun before the Ragers tear into me?”

  Two more steps, and he’s backed me against the wall again, only this time, he’s not listening to me. My words are falling off him like blunted arrows.

  With his forearm pressed against the wall beside me, he leans in, dragging his nose along my jawline, and when I clamp my eyes shut, all I can see is the disappointment on Valdys’s face.

  “This isn’t going to save you, Cadmus. Taking what you want from me isn’t going to save you. It isn’t going to make you feel better. And it’s certainly not going to give you reason in the end.”

  He pulls away from me, the pale green of his eyes softening the permanent smirk he wears. “You never know, sunshine. Fucking you might be exactly what saves me. Maybe if I come back with their little treasure, they’ll let me have you all to myself, as a reward.”

  “And Neela?”

  As his lips stretch into a smile, absent of that flicker of remorse I saw earlier, my stomach sinks. “Why do you think I give a fuck about Neela, huh? I don’t. I never did.” His palm slams against my throat, trapping the air in my chest, and I watch his jaw tic with the grinding of his teeth. “It was always you. The dreams.” His tongue drags over my cheek, and I press my lips together as he licks my mouth. “The fantasies. All the twisted fucking fantasies.” Releasing my neck, he slides his hands beneath my arms, urging them over my head, and threads his fingers into mine. “Those were the worst of it.” Hips forward, he grinds his erection against me and shudders a breath. “Imagining all the things I wanted to do to you.”

  “What are you talking about?”

  “This place is all about punishment. Even the parts that feel like reward. I spent four years in here because of you. Injections that felt like my insides were being ripped out through my asshole. The surgeries. The tests. I’ve been cut with a blade so many times, I can’t even feel it anymore. All because of that fucking day in the yard. Because of you.” He tightens his grip around my hands and presses me to the wall. “All for the promise that, when it was over, you’d be mine. You were my prize.”

  Oh, God. Ericsson has been using me against him for longer than I imagined. Feeding off his hate for me.

  “Imagine my disappointment when they gave you to Valdys.” He dips his head and clamps his lips around the crook of my neck, moaning as he sucks at where I imagine a mark will be left on my throat for Valdys. “The stronger one, they said. And Neela was my fucking consolation prize for four years of letting them turn me into this.” His teeth bite down into my flesh, and when I flinch, he holds me tight against the wall. When he pulls away, the softness in his eyes from before has hardened into something cold and wicked. “So you better believe that I’m going to fuck you tonight. It’s been a long time coming.”

  I can see it in his eyes--there’s no compromise there. No care, or concern for my feelings about Valdys. This is his revenge. Reparation for hours, months, years of torture he’s endured, because of me.

  I lean forward and press my lips to his, letting my tongue glide past his teeth. With my arms still pinned, I use my mouth to fight him, to cap the words that seem to have stoked his anger, and when he kisses me back, sliding his hands to either side of my face, I know I’ve broken through. Forehead pressed to his, I sever the kiss for air, my face still caught in the palms of his hands. “I’m sorry for what they did to you. Because of me. I’m so sorry, Cadmus. If I could steal some of the pain from you, I would.”

  “Would you?” At the calm in his voice, I lift my eyes to his, and catch the pinch of his brows, the agony in his eyes, where an unseen battle rages inside of him.

  Held imprisoned by his arms once again, I study the trepidation creeping across his face. “You’re afraid.”

  His jaw shifts, muscles hardening. “I fear nothing.”

  “Then, I’m afraid. For you.”

  He doesn’t say anything in response, but t
he angry snicker tells me he doesn’t believe me.

  I need him to see me, and not the girl who had him sent off to be tortured. “If you die, they win. And I can’t bear to let them win again. At your expense.”

  “Perhaps you’ve forgotten who you’re talking to. I’m not Valdys.” The poisonous hate still runs thick over his words, and when he shoves his hand down into the band of my pants, yanking them to my thighs, I feel my efforts waning with him. “You belong to all three of us. It’s our Alpha blood that runs through you, therefore you are as much mine as his.” Palm smoothing down over my hip, he drags his lips over mine, but doesn’t commit to a kiss. “Why else would you respond to my touch this way?”

  “Is there any part of you that respects him, at all? More than me?”

  “He fucking did this to me!” His roar of anger reverberates inside the room, and I turn my head away from it, flinching as though he’s slapped me across the face.

  “He wears the same band at his throat. What was done to you, was done to him, too. He’s suffered the same.”

  There’s a war inside of him. If there wasn’t, he’d have taken me by now.

  Cool air hits my bare sex, reminding me I stand exposed in front of him. He seems to remember, too, tugging his pants down to spring free his obvious erection, one I felt pressed against me through the fabric. With a hand on my shoulder, thumb adding pressure to the sensitive part of my throat, he rests his forehead against mine. Cock in hand, he drags his tip over my belly and licks his lips. “I just need to be inside you once. I just need to feel you one time. Get it the fuck out of my system. Out of my head.”

  Tears slip down my cheeks, as I stand here, waiting for him to shove himself inside of me. “Is that all it would take? And you’d let me go?”

  “Yes. I’ll let you go. He can have you.” Hot breath blasts against my cheek, as he leaves a kiss there. “Just let me feel you.”

  In the seconds that follow, while his resolve to have me is surely stirred by my silence, I think of Valdys. The disappointment in his eyes. But it won’t stop this game. Only Cadmus can bring these encounters to a screeching halt, the same way he did back in the observation room--by walking away from me. “Okay.” As much as it kills me to concede, I nod my head and sniff. “Do it, then.”