by Sarah Bailey
Julian leaned in close to him and said, “Get the hell out of here before I break your ugly face.” Mr. Orange Velour shrugged him off, and then quickly disappeared into the crowd.
Lisa’s eyes were fluttering all over the place, but I noticed they were also glazed over. She looked agitated, and she was swaying on her feet. Finally she looked at me, her expression irritated and confused. “What the hell? Am I not allowed to hook up?” Her speech came out slurred.
I looked at her in disbelief. “Not when you have a boyfriend.”
I saw recognition glimmer in her eyes, followed by guilt. She nodded slightly, and took a step toward me, but stumbled and almost fell. Julian caught her by the arm and steadied her. “Easy there,” he said, keeping her upright. I looked at her closely. Her lipstick was smudged all over her face, and her eyes were bloodshot.
“Come on,” I said, taking her other arm. “We’re going home.” As we passed the bar, Angela shot us a worried look. Lisa was so trashed she could barely walk. I gave Angela a defiant, angry shrug, and turned my head away. I knew it wasn’t her fault. Lisa was a big girl, and she could make her own choices. But Angela did give Lisa the coke, and for that reason I was furious with her. When we finally made it out of the club, Lisa tripped on the curb, and Julian caught her just in time. Her dress hitched up when she lurched forward, revealing her buttocks clad in only a g-string. She let out a long, hysterical laugh, and all eyes in the line outside the club turned to look at her. A camera flashed a few times, and I turned around to see a photographer taking pictures of us.
Great. Just great. I could only imagine how this would be written up by the press. It would look bad for Julian. And it would definitely be the last thing Lisa needed right now. Her bare ass on page six of some trashy tabloid.
The ride home was silent. Lisa was passed out in the window seat. Julian looked deep in thought. He finally grabbed my hand and said, “I’m worried about your friend. Something’s going on with her, and she’s using booze and drugs to self-medicate.”
I nodded. “I know,” I said. “I need to talk to her.”
Julian gave my hand a little squeeze. “If she needs to be referred to a doctor, or an addiction clinic, let me know. I have some contacts in New York.”
I looked at him with concern. “Contacts? Were you in rehab?”
Julian looked grim. “No,” he said, “but my sister’s an alcoholic, and I was able to get her help just in the nick of time. She was literally drinking herself to death.”
I took a closer look at his face. His brow was furrowed in worry, and his eyes were tense. “Is she okay now?” I asked.
He let out a long sigh. “She still struggles with it every day, but she’s been sober for two years.” He gave my hand another small squeeze. “She’s back in Los Angeles these days, but she was in New York when she unraveled. I knew something was wrong. When I went out to see her, she was so thin. Emaciated. She looked sick. And then I found her stash of booze. I practically had to drag her by the hair to the hospital.”
Julian’s expression became pained, and he looked out the window. I stroked his arm, then ran my fingers through his hair. He turned toward me, grabbed my face, and gave me a long, tender kiss. His eyes were soft, and his touch was so tender. I felt completely overwhelmed. Julian was opening up to me. Trusting me with his family secrets. I snuggled up to him, resting my head against his chest. He stroked my cheek with his finger, and pulled me tighter against him. “The people I love mean everything to me,” he said. “They always come first. I’ve been called overbearing. Overprotective. Maybe I am. But I want my loved ones to be safe and happy.”
I let out a long sigh, and reached up to stroke Julian’s face. “You’re an amazing man, Julian. You’re sister is lucky to have you as a brother. You probably saved her life.”
He shook his head. “I should have figured it out sooner. Prevented her from suffering. Watching her go through rehab was agonizing. I felt so fucking helpless.”
I bit my lip, and locked eyes with him. “You helped her, Julian, as much as you could. But at the end of the day, people need to fight their own battles.”
Julian shrugged noncommittally. “There are some battles people should never have to face alone,” he said.
When the limo arrived in front of our condo building, Lisa was still passed out. Julian lifted her up and carried her into the apartment. “Put her in my bed,” I said. “I’ll sleep on the couch.”
Julian nodded. “You lead the way,” he said. He placed her gingerly on my bed, and I took off her glasses, her shoes, and tucked her in.
“You’re going to talk to her about this tomorrow?” he asked.
“Definitely,” I said. He stroked my cheek again, and leaned in for a kiss. His lips were hot and tender, and he kissed me earnestly. “I wish you could stay,” I said, wrapping my arms around his neck. He groaned slightly, and I felt his cock get semi-hard against me.
“Don’t tempt me,” he said. “I’m insatiable around you.” He kissed me again, hard this time, then pulled away. “I’ll see you soon, baby,” he said. The way he said ‘baby’, his voice husky and possessive, sent a little thrill up my spine.
“See you soon, handsome,” I said, walking him to the door. He flashed me a darkly sexy smile, then leaned down and nipped at my lower lip with his teeth.
“I can’t wait to handcuff you again,” he said, running a finger through my hair. “You’re so beautiful. And you’re mine. All mine.” His words sent another shiver through me.
“And you’re mine,” I said softly. He gave me a wide smile, clearly pleased by my reaction.
“Sweet dreams,” he said then turned and walked out the door. I stood staring after him until he disappeared around the corner. I was his. His girlfriend. He’d claimed me, possessed me. Given me more pleasure in bed than any man before him. He understood me. Understood what I needed. The memory of being chained to his bed, writhing in ecstasy beneath him, flashed through my head, sending a bolt of heat up from between my legs. I sighed deeply, and went to get ready for bed, knowing I’d be dreaming of Julian all night, and wake up in the morning feeling hungry for his touch.
Chapter 14
“Morning sleepy head,” I said, walking into my bedroom and pulling up the blinds.
Lisa groaned and squinted against the light flooding the room. “What the fuck?” she said. “I’m on vacation. I should be allowed to sleep in.”
“You did sleep in,” I said. “It’s one in the afternoon. Your flight leaves at ten. If we’re going to do anything today, you need to get your ass out of bed. Like, now.”
Lisa covered her face with a pillow and groaned again. “My head hurts like hell,” she said.
“You know what they say, ‘Coke before liquor, never sicker.’”
She picked up her pillow and tossed it at me. “Bitch, please. It’s ‘Beer before liquor, never sicker,’ and for your information, I was drinking champagne.”
“Wow,” I said, “Coke and champagne. You’re all class.”
Lisa shot me a dirty look, then crawled out of bed. “Where are my glasses?” she asked.
“On my bedside table.”
She grabbed them, and put them on her face. Then she got up and walked over to my full length mirror. “Holy hell. I look like total crap,” she said. “My face looks like a four year old drew on it with crayon.”
Her eyes became more alert, and she pulled her hair back, revealing a giant hickey on her neck. The moment she saw it, she froze. “Oh. My. God.” she said, swiveling toward me. “What the hell happened last night?”
I let out a long sigh, and crossed my arms over my chest. “I caught you sucking face with a guy dressed like a pimp. Orange velour and prescription sunglasses. Ring a bell?”
Lisa’s face became pale, and she looked like she was going to be sick. “Shit, Ser,” she said, coming back to the bed and slumping down onto it. “This is so not good.”
I walked over to the bed, and sat down besid
e her, putting my arm around her shoulders. “Do you remember anything from last night?” I asked.
She shook her head. “There was the limo ride, the champagne, and then I was dancing. That’s all I remember.” She covered her face with her hands. “I can’t believe this,” she said, rubbing her temples. “I totally cheated on Mark. I can’t believe this.” She turned to me and gave me a pleading look. “You know me, Ser. You know this isn’t me. I don’t cheat. Ever.” Lisa stood up and started pacing around the room. “What am I going to do?”
I bit my lip, and gave her a worried look. “What’s going on with you?” I asked. “You’re right. This isn’t you. Something’s up. You were totally out of control last night. I’ve never seen you like this.”
Lisa fisted her hair in her hands. “Fuck, I don’t know,” she said. “I was trying to take the edge off, I guess.” She slumped back down on the bed and started rubbing the back of her neck. “I’m just so stressed about work. And I’m wired all the time.” She let out a long sigh, and turned to me, her eyes full of fear and alarm. “Every day I come home from work now, I drink. It’s like I have to. If I don’t I go stir crazy and stay up all night. I can’t fall asleep without it.”
I nodded slowly and reached for her hand. “I thought so,” I said. “I mean, I knew you were in trouble.” I paused for a second, debating whether to go on. I decided I needed to tell her about my conversation with Julian. “I talked to Julian. He says he knows some people in New York who could help.”
Lisa shot me a look of betrayal. “You talked to Julian about this?” she said accusingly. She stared at me hard for a long moment, then sprung to her feet. “I can’t believe it, Ser. This is my private business. How could you expose me to a practical stranger like that?”
I stared at her in disbelief. “Are you kidding me with this?” I asked. “Your private business became very public last night. You were acting reckless as hell. Plus you friggin’passed out in the limo, and Julian had to carry you up to the apartment. That fact that there was something seriously wrong with you was fully on display. And Julian was concerned enough about you to offer some help.”
“I don’t need any help!” she yelled, glaring at me.
I sprung to my feet so that we were closer to eye level. “Yes you do,” I said firmly. “And I’m not taking no for an answer. You have a chemical dependency, Lise. And you will go to a rehab facility. Are we clear?”
She smirked at me, and crossed her arms. “Wow, have you ever become bossy. I guess your boyfriend’s overbearing tendencies have worn off on you.”
I shrugged nonchalantly and smiled at her. “Maybe they have. And maybe that’s not a bad thing. He just protects the people he loves. And I plan on doing the same.”
Lisa’s expression softened, and then tears sprung to her eyes. I rushed over to her and pulled her into a tight hug. She started sobbing uncontrollably. I held her tight to me until all of her tears were cried out.
“Fine,” she finally said. “I’ll take the damn numbers. Make a couple of phone calls when I get back to New York.”
I stared at her hard. “I’m going to come down to visit in a couple of weeks to make sure you’re doing okay.”
She shook her head. “You don’t have to do that. I’ll be fine.”
I pinned her with another stern look. “I don’t have to. I want to. And I will.”
Lisa wiped away her tears, and her lips curled into a fragile smile. “Do you have any eggs? And Advil? My stomach is churning, and my head feels like it’s ready to explode.”
I rubbed her arm in sympathy, went to my bedside table, and grabbed a bottle of Advil. “Here,” I said. “Now let’s go see about making some eggs.”
Lisa joined me in the kitchen as I started beating the yolk. “What do you want to do today?” I asked.
She bit her lip, and gave me a weary look. “There’s this band I want to see,” she said quietly. “They’re playing in Venice Beach.”
I could feel my face light up. “Awesome!” I said. “I trust your taste. What’s the band’s name?”
She stared at me for a long moment, her expression pained. “The Maltese Falcons,” she finally blurted out.
My stomach dropped, and my breath caught in my throat. I turned away from Lisa and started furiously beating the eggs. The Maltese Falcons were an up-and-coming band, and all of the members were great friends with my ex, Rob, and his band The Bare Essentials. They were all part of a close knit musical community, and always went to each other’s gigs.
I hastily pulled out a frying pan from the cupboard, and turned on the stove. “You know Rob’s going to be there,” I said, frowning at Lisa.
She nodded, and took a step closer to me. “Don’t you think it’s time to face him and get closure? I mean, you’ve moved on, right? He can’t hurt you anymore.”
I could feel my lower lip start to tremble. Was I over him? I thought I was. But I definitely wasn’t over the hurt and humiliation. These were the facts: I loved him, and he cheated on me. He put me down, took advantage of my generosity. I kept giving to him, even though I knew he was taking advantage of me, even though I knew he didn’t love me the way I loved him. I knew he wanted me. I knew he needed me.
But I also knew he never fully understood or acknowledged who I really was. And I had been fine with that. I had been fine playing the same role my mother did with my father. Giving Rob everything, without getting any recognition in return. Sure, he was out of my life, but he was still affecting my relationships. My fear about opening up to Julian, giving myself up to him truly and completely, was the result of my relationship with Rob. I was still carrying that baggage with me, even if I didn’t love him anymore.
But Lisa was right. I needed closure. If things with Julian were to stand a chance at working, I had to get over my fears, and leave my past behind me. I took a deep breath, and fixed my eyes on Lisa. “You’re right,” I said. “I need closure. I can’t let him have power over me any longer.”
Lisa smiled at me brightly, then rushed over and pulled me into a huge hug. “That’s my girl,” she said. “Show the fucker you’ve moved on, and how badly he screwed up.” She pulled back, and locked eyes with me, her expression suddenly serious. “You know he’ll never find anyone who even comes close to you, right? You’re one in a million, Ser. I’m sure he knows that by now. But it’s too late. He can fucking eat his heart out.”
I gave her a tight squeeze, then went back to making the eggs. “Where are they playing?” I asked, then held up my hand. “No, wait, let me take a wild guess. Their gig is at The Bohemian.”
Lisa grinned at me. “Of course it is.”
“What time are they playing?”
“Four o’clock.”
I looked at my watch, and sighed. “Okay. We’ll eat up, clean ourselves up, and then head over.”
“Perfect,” Lisa said.
I shot her a look of feigned irritation and said, “Now can you make yourself useful and brew some coffee? You know how badly I need my–”
“Caffeine fix. Yeah, I know. You don’t need to remind me,” she said, rolling her eyes. “I’ll get right on it.”
Chapter 15
We pulled up in front of The Bohemian at a quarter to four. It was a gorgeous day. The sunlight in the parking lot was strong, and filtered down through the palm trees, warming our skin. Ocean Front Walk was just a few blocks away, and we could hear the crashing waves, and smell the ocean. We were both dressed hipster casual, which meant, for starters, tight frayed jeans, and leather jackets. I was big on mixing high and low fashion, so I’d coupled my artfully aged skinny jeans with a funky, floral Neiman Marcus tank top. Lisa had opted for what she called ‘in-your-face euro-trash,’ a vintage green velour top with a faux-fur collar that only she could pull off. She’d paired the outfit with black bitch boots that had a dramatic four inch heel. I, on the other hand, had chosen silver ballet flats.
Lisa pulled down the sunshade to apply bright red lipstick and check he
rself out one last time. “Okay,” she said. “I look alive again. We’re good to go.”
The Bohemian was a popular dive in the heart of Venice Beach. The locals loved the place, and several bands who made names for themselves in Los Angeles and abroad had first gigged here. This was, in fact, the bar where I first met Rob. As we approach the wooden building, with the scrawling purple neon sign flashing ‘Bohemian,’ I felt a shiver of both dread and anticipation run through me. I had so many memories associated with this place. I’d come here countless times to watch Rob perform, until The Bare Essentials made it big. The managers, the owners, and the bartenders treated his band like family. They’d treated me like family too. I took a deep breath, and told myself if I could make it through this afternoon, I’d officially be able to make peace with my past.