When Cole opened the door he picked up the box from her hands, set it on the floor and stepped onto the back porch with her. Leaning into her saying, “You are the bacon to my eggs,” right before he kissed her senseless.
Laughing too hard to kiss him back with any serious emotion, she slipped out of his embrace and lightly punched his chest. “You’re mighty chipper this morning, but that’s probably because you don’t have to pull up hundred-year-old tile in that bathroom upstairs.”
“And neither do you, cupcake. We’re playing hooky today.”
“No way. My boss is a stubborn mule. He’ll have my hide if I skip work.”
He cocked his eyebrow at her. “Oh, he’ll have your hide all right.” Once again he laid his lips on hers, nearly knocking them both over the porch railing. Minutes later they came up searching for much needed, but not wanted, air.
“What exactly do you have planned for today, Mr. Tucker?”
“Follow me.” He grabbed her hand and brought her past the barn, toward another building that housed the tractor and other farm equipment. “Put these on.” He handed her a helmet, snow pants and boots, and grinned.
“I’ve never been on a snowmobile before.” In all honesty she had hoped to go for a ride the other day when Emma and Mason drove by the sledding hill. She was a tad bit jealous that Levi got to go for a ride, but the excitement in his eyes had made her smile all the way to her core.
“Wrap your arms around me real tight and you won’t fall off.” He kissed her nose and put the helmet on her head for her.
The layers of their ski jackets and her gloves didn’t disguise the hardness of his toned body. Heat radiated through her not because of the layers or the unseasonably warm February temperature, but because she could imagine herself falling in love again. It wasn’t like the young, innocent love she had with Adam. What she experienced with Cole was different. Powerful, bold, daring.
Sam had changed since she’d lost her husband and it only made sense that her choice in men would be different as well.
They rode for nearly an hour; her thigh muscles ached from gripping on to the sled during every turn. Cole slowed the machine down as they came to a road and he drove up to a cute little hole-in-the-wall diner.
After turning off the ignition and pulling off his helmet, he swung one leg over the sled and grinned like a little boy on Christmas morning.
“How was the ride?” He wiggled his eyebrows and she laughed.
“Exhilarating. But my legs can’t move.”
“Oh, I can help you with that.”
Before she had time to register what he was doing, Cole scooped her off the sled and carried her toward the diner.
“Wait.” She laughed. “My helmet.” Struggling to not fall out of his arms, she pulled the helmet off and placed it next to his on the sled. “Now put me down. I feel ridiculous.”
“When people ask what you did today, you can tell them Cole Tucker swept you off your feet.” He winked and set her down.
Grateful to have her feet under her but disappointed to lose the close body contact with him, she turned her energy to straightening her pony tail.
“Come on, sunshine. Let’s grab some breakfast. This place makes the best pancakes.”
They ate mounds of pancakes—well, Cole had mounds and Sam ate three—drenched in pure New Hampshire maple syrup and laughed over stories of Cole’s reckless childhood. He made life fun and safe—two things she didn’t know were missing from her life.
During her relationship and marriage with Adam, Sam had always been relaxed and being safe never was an issue, but after the tragedy her life had turned upside down. She had been afraid to drive, to take Levi to the doctor or to the grocery store. Afraid they’d get in a car accident and she’d lose another person she loved.
Watching Cole’s dark eyes sparkle as he made fun of his brothers, but mostly himself, she realized what the difference was. Cole made her feel. He had a genuine happiness and love for his family that Sam used to carry as well. Maybe he would be the one to bring happiness back into her life.
After paying the waitress, he placed a hand on her lower back, ushering her out of the diner. His touch warmed her even as the outside air chilled around them. She cocked her head to the side and studied his face. Sure, he was ridiculously handsome. His short, black hair slightly matted from the helmet looked boyishly adorable. The irresistible dimple in his cheek beckoned to be touched, or kissed, and she stared at it as it grew. And grew.
Cole’s smile widened and she blushed at his heated stare.
“How was heaven when you left it?”
An unladylike snort slipped out. “I’m no angel.” She looked back to his face and watched his eyes darken, his pupils dilate and his jaw clench. “I mean…I’m not a bad girl…or rather, person. I just…I mean…I’m not perfect.”
He shook his head, grabbed the front of her ski jacket, and yanked her into his arms. He took her mouth with such force that she should have been appalled, but the bad girl that she didn’t know existed really, really, liked the way his lips moved over hers and they responded with such.
Sam ripped the gloves off her hands so she could touch his face. They didn’t bother coming up for air, forgetting they were behaving like two hormone-raging teenagers in the middle of a parking lot. She ran her hands through his short hair and cupped his cheek, feeling around for the incredible dimple. It was hard to find when his mouth was busy making love to hers, so she pulled back and trailed kisses to the spot where she knew the dimple to be.
“Damn. You better stop before I forget we’re in public and get us arrested for indecent exposure.”
She stepped back and looked down at her unzipped coat and disheveled sweater. Sam was so focused on Cole that she didn’t even realize where his hands had been.
Completely mortified, she turned away, straightened her top and bent down to pick up her gloves. “I’m sorry, Cole. I don’t know what happened. I…yeah.”
He reached out and slowly zipped her coat for her. “The ride home is going to be a bitch. Sorry.” He cringed. “Not very romantic. It’s going to be a bit uncomfortable for junior. But I’ll deal. Definitely worth it.” He kissed her hard and fast and pulled her helmet down over her head.
Biting back a smile, she hopped on the sled and leaned into him all the way back to his house. After another knee-wobbling make out session—because to call it a kiss would simply not do it justice—she left flushed and completely satisfied. He took into consideration the time and made sure they returned in time to pick up Levi from preschool.
For three hours, she had no concept of time and had not once thought about her other responsibilities. Sam should have been ashamed, but the glow on her cheeks and the flutter in her heart wouldn’t let her feel guilty of some much needed love and affection from a man.
A very, very sexy and sweet and considerate and romantic man.
Chapter 10
The next few weeks flew by with Sam finishing the renovation in Cole’s bathroom and bedroom. Soon, he’d do a little naked renovation in his new bed. Between the frequent snowplowing, the demands of the apartment rentals, and entertaining Levi after preschool hours, Sam always had something to do and had little time to spend alone with Cole. Something else he’d like to renovate.
The animals on the farm needed constant care, and Cole had taken on a few more students as well as horse boarders. He spent countless hours drawing up new designs for the farm and researching more organic and profitable changes for the business.
Mother Nature dumped record amounts of snow on New England. It seemed like every other day there was just enough plowable snow to keep Sam busy during the day and too tired to play at night.
That didn’t mean he and Sam hadn’t seen each other. He would go over for dinner a few times a week and play games with Levi until he went to bed, and then he and Sam would cuddle on the couch talking. And kissing, or rather, making out. Lots and lots of making out. Never in his wildest imag
ination—and Cole had quite the imagination—would he believe he’d be content with a PG-13 relationship with a woman. Hell, forget the rating, it was the relationship piece that he couldn’t fathom. Until now.
They talked and talked. And talked. It was as if he opened the flood gates for her and she let it all roll out. She mentioned the fact that she didn’t have any close girlfriends and had enjoyed hanging out with Emma and Paige on occasion during the past month. And she also mentioned that she thought of him as a friend as well.
He hadn’t pressed her for anything more than a mating of tongues and lips, and he struggled with pressing her for more than she was giving. He knew if he pushed her too fast, she’d shut down and he’d lose her completely. Cole had never shown restraint as he had the past few weeks. His mama would be proud, not that he ever, ever would talk with her about something like this.
The gentleman act had been a cover for his guilt. Sam opened up to him and Cole didn’t have the courage to tell her about his past with the bottle. Not after learning it was an alcoholic that killed her husband and daughter. Sam would never look at him the same way if she found out the truth.
When she found out. Cole may have sex on the brain twenty-four/seven, but he wouldn’t deceive her. The guilt that weighed in his gut was what kept him from stripping Sam naked. Maybe it was a sign of maturity. Or stupidity. Cole had no freaking clue.
When he pulled away—because he was always the one to pull back—she’d have a look on her face like she wanted more. But when the high wore off, he’d bet his latest mare she would be relieved he didn’t take it any further.
They talked a lot about Adam Chase, her husband. He didn’t mind at first; he wanted to hear about Levi’s father. But after hearing so many stories about Mr. Perfect and Wonderful, he regretted it. Sam had obviously loved him and he’d loved her. They’d started their relationship in high school and never had the chance to date anyone else. Sam made it sound blissfully romantic, and he wondered how someone could be so lucky to find their soul mate at such a young age.
How Sam made it sound, Adam hadn’t come with baggage, and Cole had a whole baggage claim full of luggage. To the outside world his life may seem perfect, but Cole knew it was far from it, which was one of the reasons why he never had a long-term relationship.
Most of their conversations revolved around work, Levi or Sam’s past. She asked about Cole’s family and seemed to love hearing stories about them, yet he kept the truly intimate parts of his heart closed off. He told himself it was because she was dealing with her own past and didn’t need to take on any more; but deep down inside he knew why. Once he revealed his skeletons, she’d walk away.
He didn’t mean to keep his drunk driving a secret. Not that it was a secret in the town. Once she got to know Cole and saw that it was a one-time stupid mistake, he hoped she would see past it and keep things going between them. But he doubted it.
And, damn, they had something going.
And it was killing him. His hot water tank wasn’t getting much of a work out. Cold showers at night and every morning hadn’t done the trick, and his body begged for release. He wanted, no needed, Samantha Chase. And it wasn’t about sex. Yeah, he wanted that, but he didn’t need it. Cole grunted at that thought. As long as he never put that statement in writing, he’d be all set. His reputation preceded him, but he never really needed sex. He was no addict, just like he wasn’t addicted to alcohol. He simply liked them both. Sex and alcohol.
Sam, however, he needed. She was all he thought about while working, he dreamed of her while he slept, and woke up with a smile on his face because the first thought that crossed his mind as he struggled to wake before the sun was Sam.
Her laugh.
Her smile.
Hell, he even thought about her son and his crazy obsession with all things superhero.
Shoveling manure out of the stalls didn’t suck so bad because his mind kept busy thinking about where he could take Sam. He’d even pre-planned some of his flirtatious lines. That never happened before, they usually fell out of his mouth, but he found himself thinking of a line that would make her laugh. She tended to like the over-the-top lines that would give any other guy a “Loser of the Year” award.
After finishing his evening chores and a pile of paperwork, he grabbed a quick shower, shaved, and then threw on a pair of jeans and a flannel shirt. Levi would probably be in bed by the time he showed up, so he smacked some aftershave on his cheeks before heading out the door.
Tonight he’d man up and tell her the truth. Confess his past sins and hope like hell she’d still keep him in her life.
Cole knocked softly on Sam’s front door, not wanting to wake the little guy, and let himself in. She sat on the couch folding laundry, a sexy smile taking over his face when she saw him, and junior betrayed him once again. Thankful for his heavy coat that concealed how happy he was to see her, he closed the door behind him and bent down to untie his boots.
Once he’d calmed his body and adjusted his jeans, he unzipped his coat and hung it in the closet. Sam finished the laundry and pushed the basket aside, making room for Cole. He sank into the couch and she leaned in to give him a kiss. “Well, hello,” he said when her lips left his.
She snuggled in closer, draping her delicious legs across his lap and snuggling her bottom into the couch cushion. Oh, to be that cushion!
“If I could reach out and hold a star for every time you've made me smile, I'd hold the sky in the palm of my hand.”
“You are a tease,” she said as she stretched her tiny feet. He and Sam were in their usual spot on her couch in front of the fireplace, cuddled close, hands constantly touching each other.
“No,” he said, grabbing her hand and kissing her fingers. “That’s actually not a line. Well, okay, yeah, it is, but I mean it. Well, I mean them all, but it’s true, Sam. You’re an amazing mother. And you’re beautiful. And funny.” He kissed her fingers again. “And sexy. And…”
He cupped her cheek; she closed her eyes, turning her face into his hand. Slowly, he tilted her face toward his and kissed her lips. They tasted sweet, like tea, and wet and willing. She opened her mouth wider for him, and her tongue danced with his. Unsure who the moans were coming from, he pulled her body closer to his, wrapped his arms around her, and then lifted her on top of him. He knew he shouldn’t push her, especially with his secret looming over them, but she smelled like freshly fallen snow and her skin was as soft as a baby lamb’s coat. Everything about her was pure and innocent, and he was the devil trying to turn her into a black sheep. And damn if her body wasn’t one hundred percent receptive.
Sam’s hands roamed up his chest and stroked his collarbone under his shirt.
They surrendered themselves to the passion burning between them, kissing and touching—total PG touching—and moaning—rated R moaning. Pulling her tighter to him so she could feel his arousal, he sighed, “God, I want you.”
She sat up, straddling him, and covered her face. “I can’t. I can’t. I’m sorry. Adam, I—” She moved her hands and stared down at Cole, pain and astonishment in her eyes. All the heat and passion that had been burning between them suddenly turned cold.
Quickly, he straightened her shirt and moved her off his body. The stab to his chest hurt like a son of a bitch and dammed if he had a freaking clue what to do about it.
“I’m not Adam. And that’s probably the problem.” He stood and looked around the living room for his coat. Confused and hurt, he stomped to the hall closet and ripped his coat off the hanger. “I like you, Sam. I mean, I like you. I’ve been trying to figure us,” he pointed at her and himself, “out for weeks. I’m stumped. You’re hot and cold. Hot and cold. You act like you want me, but I get it now. I can’t compete with a ghost. I’m not Adam. I never will be. He sounded like a great guy, but he’s gone, and keeping yourself locked up like a nun won’t bring him back either.” Cole shoved his feet in his boots not bothering to tie them.
He opened the front do
or, sighed and turned around to face her. Calmly he said, “I don’t want to replace him. I never could live up to the pedestal that you have him on, but I’d like a place somewhere in your life. If it’s only as friends, so be it. You make the call. Let me know what you’ve decided.”
He closed the door softly behind him and dragged himself to his truck. His head heavy, and his heart empty.
* * * *
He was an absolute idiot.
“You dumbass,” Emma said, reassuring Cole of his own feelings. “I don’t know what you did to that poor woman, but you better fix it.” She scooped up a fistful of snow and beamed his head with a snowball.
Cole didn’t even try to dodge it. “I’m not having this conversation with you, so shut it.” He picked up the pitchfork and continued cleaning out the horse stalls. It was Saturday morning, which meant Emma would help muck stalls and take a few horses out for some exercise. Normally he looked forward to her visit, but he wasn’t up to any playful banter or friendly interrogation. He wanted to be alone and wallow in his aloneness.
“I’m not letting you sulk in a stupid pity party.”
Again, she read his mind.
“You were a pitiful sight for three months after your accident, and then you met Sam and you were back to your old self.”
“No, I wasn’t.”
“Well, your old self minus the excessive drinking, partying, and slutting around.”
Cole grunted and shoveled the last pitchfork of manure into the wheelbarrow and pushed the cart outside, dumping the contents into the compost pile.
“I don’t know what happened with you and Sam, but—”
“That’s right. You don’t. So like I said before, shut up.”
He knew his sour attitude wouldn’t push Emma away. If anyone could take his crap it was her. His family probably had another intervention meeting planned for him and made her come out to make sure he wasn’t suicidal.
Trying to ignore her, he lifted Riley’s saddle off the shelf and set it on the stallion’s back. The horse stood perfectly still while Cole strapped the saddle and spoke hushed, comforting words to him. His back was to Emma, but he could hear her saddling up Lady as well.
False Impressions Page 10