The Billionaire’s Baby Chase

by Valerie Parv

  She was brooding over a cup when Grace burst into the kitchen, her normally placid expression panicky. “Is James around?”

  “In the study. What’s the…” But Grace barreled past her without stopping. After a hurried conversation, which carried through the house, she and James came back into the kitchen together. His set expression triggered alarm bells in Zoe’s head. “What’s wrong?”

  “Genevieve’s gone riding on Amira.”

  Panic flared through Zoe. “By herself?”

  Grace wrung her hands. “She was holding the pony’s reins while I led Ferrere out for his morning exercise. I was only gone a couple of minutes. I still don’t know how she managed to scramble up on the pony by herself, but they were gone when I came out. Someone must have left a gate unlatched after the party last night.”

  “Are you sure one of the stable hands didn’t go with her?” James asked in a clipped voice. His face was a stone mask but his hands were clenched to white-knuckle tightness.

  Grace shook her head, looking desperate. “I’m positive. None of them saw her ride off.”

  Zoe’s heart raced. “Last night she told me she could ride Amira without a leading rein.”

  “Only in the training paddock under my supervision,” Grace asserted. “I’d never let her go off by herself.”

  Zoe caught James’s arm, feeling the hardness of set muscles under her fingers. It was tempting to hold on to him as to a lifeline, but she made herself let go. “There’s something else you ought to know.” She glanced at Grace, then took a deep breath. It was going to come out anyway, and it might be important under the circumstances. “Last night Genie was upset because she overheard me talking about going away.”

  James’s hard gaze raked her and he swore quietly. “Then this is no accident.” To Grace, he said, “I’ll go after her on Ferrere. You check out the river flats. I’ll scout along the ridge. She can’t have gone far.”

  At the mention of his massive black stallion, Zoe went cold, the memory of her nightmare flooding back. She was terrified for Genie’s safety and now she might risk losing both of them. His doctors had warned James against riding so soon after his surgery. “Can’t you send some of the hands out?” she implored, fear threading her voice. “Dr. Leigh said you shouldn’t ride while you’re still healing.”

  “Dr. Leigh doesn’t have a four-year-old daughter lost in the wilderness,” he snapped back.

  His face said he wouldn’t be stopped. She drew what courage she could from his determination and nodded reluctant assent. “I’ll come with you.”

  He shook his head. “Someone should stay here in case the horse brings her home.” He touched a hand under her chin. “Don’t worry, I’ll find her.”

  Her shining eyes telegraphed the depth of her feelings for him. He would probably think it was for Genie, but the thought of the risk he was taking was all the more terrifying because she loved him so much. “James, wait,” she said urgently. “I want to tell you—”

  He stilled, watching her intently. “Tell me what, Zoe?”

  Pride made her withhold the admission. “Just…be careful,” she amended. He nodded tautly, then strode outside. Through the window she saw him swing himself onto the huge black stallion. As he aimed the horse toward the ridge, she wanted to beg him to take her with him, anything but let him ride off alone. But all she could do was wait.

  Chapter Thirteen

  At the sound of footsteps on the verandah her heart leapt but it was only Jock McGovern, wanting to make sure she was all right. “It’s damned frustrating not to be able to go after them,” he growled. His old injuries made riding impossible these days. “In the old days I’d have ridden after them like a shot.”

  An idea seized her. “You can’t, but maybe I can. If you’ll wait in the house, I can take the four-wheel-drive.”

  Jock regarded her keenly. “Do you think the wee lass has headed for Blue Gum Camp?”

  Zoe’s mind raced. “In her present state, it’s possible. She could remember how happy we all were there.”

  Jock nodded. “Go, then. I’ll mind things here.”

  He seemed pleased to have a role to play, she thought, understanding how he felt. She only hoped she hadn’t bitten off more than she could chew. On impulse she snatched up the mobile phone as well as the car keys from the study. The phone didn’t always work in the shadow of the ranges, but anything was worth a try.

  Struggling to remember everything James had shown her about handling the big vehicle, she aimed it in the direction of the bush camp, her eyes sweeping the underbrush as she drove.

  Why hadn’t she paid more attention to Genie’s fears last night? She knew from her experience as a child-care worker that children’s feelings often ran deep. Genie had already lost her mother. Now she faced the prospect of losing Zoe, too. It was more than a four-year-old should have to contemplate. What if it was too late? What if they didn’t find her?

  “Stop this,” she ordered herself aloud. If anyone could find her, James would. This morning she glimpsed what loving him meant. It meant accepting that he was a man of action and wouldn’t be stopped by her or anyone. Just as well they weren’t really man and wife or she would have to live with this dread as a way of life. All the same, she knew she could find a way to bear it if only he loved her.

  A disturbance in the underbrush shattered her thoughts and she slewed the car to a halt. But it was only a pretty-faced wallaby, its daytime rest disturbed by her passing. Doe-eyes flaring in panic, it bounded across the road and disappeared into the bush.

  Heart pounding, she rested her head against the steering wheel until her breathing slowed. The sound of galloping hooves brought her head up again. This time it was a horse and she watched in horror as Amira, riderless, with stirrups and reins flying loose, reared out of the bush and tore down the track toward the homestead.

  Alarm blistered through her. Where was the pony’s young rider? Blindly, Zoe groped for the door handle and flung herself out of the car. “Genie? Genie, can you hear me? It’s Mummy.”

  She was about to plunge into the bush in the direction from which the horse had come when another apparition rose in front of her. Instinctively she lifted her arms to shield her face, realizing belatedly that it was James astride Ferrere. She almost sagged with relief when she saw that he held Genie in the saddle in front of him.

  “Oh thank God. Is she all right?”

  “She’s fine. A bit wet and bedraggled, but she’ll be okay.”

  He didn’t ask what she was doing out in the middle of the bush, but his stony expression told her the reckoning would come later. When she held up her arms, he handed the child down to her. Genie gave her a sheepish smile and linked her small arms around Zoe’s neck. “Hi, Mummy. Amira took me for a ride.”

  “I’ll say he did.” Zoe’s vision blurred as she smiled at the child, hugging her as if she would never let her go. “How did you manage to stop him?”

  With economical movements James dismounted and dropped the reins over his horse’s head. It immediately began to graze along the roadside. “She got off by sliding over Amira’s head when the pony stopped to drink at a spring,” he said.

  The gruffness in his voice wasn’t lost on Zoe. Nor was the fact that he looked worse than his daughter did. “Are you all right?” she asked in a low voice.

  He gestured dismissively. “I’ll live. More to the point, what are you doing here? I thought I told you to wait at the house.”

  At his sharp tone she bristled. “I felt I could be more useful out here. And before you yell at me, Jock’s keeping an eye on things back at the homestead.”

  Genie looked up in alarm. “Are you going to yell at both of us, Daddy?”

  His furious look swept them both. “I’m not yelling at anybody.”

  His tone belied his words. If not for Genie’s presence, he probably would yell at her, Zoe accepted. There wasn’t much she could do right in his eyes. Loving him was probably her biggest crime, but she
had no idea how to stop. Nor was she sure she wanted to, despite the pain that closed around her heart like a vise. She had thought she knew love when Genie came into her life, but it was only a foretaste of the passion she’d found with James. Knowing it couldn’t last didn’t stop her from thanking her stars for this brief glimpse of heaven.

  She buried her face in Genie’s damp sweater to hide her brimming eyes from him. “I’ll drive you home in the car. You’ve had enough horse riding for one day, young lady.”

  Genie giggled. “I’m not a young lady yet. Is Daddy coming, too?”

  Zoe was forced to meet his gaze. “Is he coming, too?”

  He nodded. “I’ll turn Ferrere into the paddock. He’ll be fine until Grace comes for him.” Having taken care of the horse, he slid into the passenger seat beside Zoe. Genie was bundled into a rug on the back seat and looked as if she might fall asleep before they reached the homestead.

  She roused herself enough to ask, “Does this mean you won’t go away now, Mummy?”

  Zoe wanted to lock her eyes shut to avoid seeing James’s face as he answered. What he said stunned her to her core. “Nobody’s going away, sweetheart.”

  “Cross your heart?”

  He gave Zoe a measured look. “Cross my heart.”

  How could he make such a promise, knowing it was bound to be broken? She couldn’t ask in front of the little girl, so she fixed her eyes on the track ahead, glad of the steering wheel under her hands to give her shaking fingers something to latch on to.

  As they neared the homestead James was able to contact Jock on the mobile phone. He promised to pass the good news to Grace and the other searchers as soon as they checked in. Genie was already a favorite with the staff so Zoe knew the news would travel around the property like wildfire.

  She was right. Most of the stable staff found reasons to be on hand when James lifted Genie out of the car. Inside the homestead Grace had fresh coffee ready and hot chocolate for Genie. When the woman offered to bathe and change the little girl, Zoe started to resist until she felt James’s restraining hand on her arm. “Let her. Genevieve will be all right,” he insisted.

  “You can’t wait to separate me from her, can you?” Zoe asked tearfully as soon as Grace had taken the little girl upstairs.

  He passed a hand across his eyes. “This has nothing to do with you. Grace blames herself for what happened and wants to make amends. She needs to know we still trust her with Genevieve.”

  She had to allow that he was right, Zoe thought, wishing she had realized what the other woman was going through. Trust James to put Grace’s feelings before his own. Zoe didn’t even want to think about how terrible he looked, as if he stayed on his feet by sheer willpower. He cradled a coffee mug in both hands and she noticed it shook slightly.

  A red stain seeped through the dressing on his neck. “You’re hurt,” she said, horrified by how thin her voice sounded.

  He touched the dressing and winced. “It’s nothing. If you keep sounding like that, I’ll think you actually care.”

  “You are my husband,” she reminded him.

  “In name only.” Now who sounded as if he was starting to care? She tried to still the fast beating of her heart as he added, “It’s the way you want it, isn’t it?”

  “Of course.” She willed herself to sound as if she meant it. She noticed he hadn’t said his feelings had changed. As long as all the love was on her side, nothing was going to change. But after his promise to Genie, she’d somehow hoped—

  She drove the wish from her mind before it was fully formed. With Andrew she had experienced the pain of a one-sided love. She didn’t intend to put herself through it again. James probably meant that he would allow her generous access to Genie. Zoe would have to be content with that.

  He linked both hands behind his neck and dropped his head back. Her own concerns forgotten, she said at once, “You’re in pain. I’m taking you to see Dr. Leigh.”

  James kept his eyes closed and a sheen of perspiration glistened on his face. “Howard isn’t at home. Today he’ll be at his surgery in Cooranbong.”

  “Then that’s where we’ll go,” she said firmly. “You look terrible.”

  He gave her a wry look. “Thanks for the compliment. But the doc was right about the riding. My spine feels as if it’s pushing up through my skull.”

  If he was admitting it—

  She fetched the car keys and told Grace where they were going then kissed Genie and went down to find James waiting in the front seat of the car with his eyes shut and his head back. Cold fear clutched at her. “James?”

  “I haven’t passed out and I’m not planning to,” he growled. “Let’s get this over with.”

  His brusqueness had more to do with his pain than with her, she told herself firmly. The unmarked road was confusing and she had to keep a lookout for kangaroos crossing their path. In the end she slowed to a crawl, earning an ironic look from James. “I didn’t break into pieces out there, Zoe.”

  She hadn’t missed his indrawn breath every time she hit a bump, either. She stopped the car and wrenched the keys out of the ignition, dangling them in front of him. “Would you prefer to drive?”

  He forced a weak grin. “Okay, message received. No more back-seat driving.”

  It was progress and she started the car again. Before she slid it into gear she looked across at him. “I know it’s my fault that Genie ran away. I should have made sure she was out of earshot before I mentioned going away.”

  His jaw tightened perceptibly. “This is on my head as well. It’s time I told her the truth and, more importantly, that we both love and want her. We’ll tell her together tomorrow, so there’s no need for you to blame yourself.”

  “I do blame myself and I don’t want her loyalties divided between us anymore.”

  There was a moment of tense silence. “Are you trying to tell me you intend to go away for good?”

  She nodded, fighting tears. “Genie…Genevieve is your child. She belongs here. She shouldn’t be torn between the two people who love her.” Her voice cracked but she forced herself to go on. “All I ask is that you let me know how she’s doing. In time if I’m not around to remind her, she’ll forget I was ever a part of her life.”

  “Is that what you want, Zoe?”

  “It has to be. When I think what could have happened to her…” She bit down on the tears welling up again.

  “What will you do?” he asked in an oddly clipped voice.

  “Return to Sydney and try to rebuild my life. I might even meet someone and have a child of my own.”

  “Oh God, Zoe, don’t.” She had expected him to sound relieved. He had won, after all. But he sounded ground down.

  It was probably his aggravated injury. She should probably have waited till he’d seen the doctor before raising the issue. But she was afraid if she postponed it her courage would fail her altogether.

  Wearily she put the car into gear. “You might wish me happiness,” she said.

  This time there was no response.

  She drove as carefully as she could, but he was still white to the eyes by the time they reached the doctor’s surgery. Thankfully the waiting room was empty. Howard Leigh grunted when he saw James. “Crazy cowboy. Didn’t I warn you to take things easy?”

  Since James didn’t seem inclined to, she explained about the search for Genie. The doctor led James into the surgery, muttering about “the indispensable man.” But in this instance he was.

  The warmth of the surgery lulled her into an exhausted doze. She awoke to find the doctor bending over her. “You look like you could use some attention yourself. Are you sure you’re okay?”

  She scrubbed her eyes. “I’m fine. How is James?”

  He frowned. “About how you’d expect for a man who undid most of his surgeon’s handiwork in one morning. I put in some new stitches and this time he must give them time to heal. You’ll have to see to it that he does. He’s getting dressed now.”

  Sh
e hesitated, wanting to go to James but unsure of her welcome. Then she squared her shoulders. This was, possibly, the last chance she would have. How could she not go to him?

  In the surgery, she drank in the sight of him hungrily. As he shrugged on his shirt, he looked like an athlete in full training, the sculpted muscles of his chest emphasized by the checked fabric that hung open from his broad shoulders.

  The doctor had replaced the dressing with a smaller one, but it was still a grim reminder of the risk James had taken. Relief at finding him on his feet surged through her and she sagged against the surgical table. “Oh, James, thank God you’re all right.”

  He was beside her in an instant, supporting her with his good arm. His strength seemed to flow into her and she smiled shakily. “I should be the one helping you. When I think what could have happened…” She couldn’t go on.

  His arm tightened around her. “It didn’t, so there’s no need to look as if your world has come to an end.”

  “Are you sure it hasn’t?”

  His gaze impaled her. “Because of Genevieve?”

  She could no longer choke back the betraying words which came out filtered by her tears. “Because of you. I know you don’t want to hear it, but I love you, James. I won’t let it get in your way, but…”

  Whatever else she might have said was silenced by the force of his mouth crushing hers. Her senses swam, but it was so exactly where she wanted to be that she gladly surrendered to the feeling, putting into her kiss all the emotion she had been holding back for so long.

  It came to her that she wasn’t the only one, and she felt bewildered by the time he released her. “James?”

  “You don’t know how much I’ve wanted to hear you tell me you love me,” he stated hoarsely. “Provided you meant it. Did you?”

  She could only nod, her throat too choked for words.

  It was enough. His breath rushed out. “All the time Howard was working on me, I was trying to work out how to convince you to stay. I can’t let you go, Zoe. I love you too much.”