Scent of Tears

by M. Juan Knecht

  Chapter Sixteen

  We had no further Indian problems, but by the time we arrived at where we were going, my neck was sore peering behind every bush and tree. And a man can ride carrying a shotgun if he is scared enough.

  Juan didn’t die on the final push to Don Topo’s Oregon ranch. He looked dead, but he was still breathing and opening his eyes every now and then. The wounds putrefied and pus drained out like water being poured from a boot. His fever kept getting worse. He couldn’t keep food down and could barely drink. Somehow, he drew on a wellspring of innate toughness and didn’t die.

  At the ranch, if you could call it a ranch, there was an abandoned shack with a lean-to attached to the side. Chipmunks, rats and mice had made free use of the cabin. At some point a skunk had doused the four walls, but it wasn’t bad. After you were inside the cabin for an hour or two, you could almost control the gag reflex.

  The brothers and I swept out the cabin as best we could, then got Juan down off his horse and laid him on a rickety rawhide-laced bed. The next half hour was spent trying to get the water pump to work. Failing to do that, we drew some water from a nearby creek and packed it to the cabin. Then we chopped some firewood for the stove and fireplace.

  Lucinda unloaded the pack animals and prepared to cook the evening meal. I rode out with the Castro brothers to try get a count on how many of the heifers had made the trip. We came up with three hundred and ninety-one. I knew two had been given to the Indians, one had drowned in a river crossing, one had been killed by a bear, and six more had wandered off and froze to death in the mountain pass. If my count was right, then Dodge would get his bonus.

  That night, we had a big pow wow sitting on the small porch outside the cabin. I left the door open so Gotch-Eyed Juan could hear what was being said. The Castro brothers sat off to the side. As always, Lucinda was front and center, fully armed with her opinions. I waited for a moment, looking out over the green meadow to the snow topped mountains. We sure weren’t in Monterey. As beautiful as Oregon was, I found myself sick with longing for the California coast. Being homesick wouldn’t help the immediate problems.

  “How far is a settlement where we can procure supplies?” I asked Dodge.

  “Fifty mile, give or take,” he replied.

  “How far is Portland?” I asked.

  “About a week’s ride, depending on how hard you want to push your horses.

  “How available is a berth on a ship going to Monterey?”

  Dodge leaned over and spit a stream of tobacco juice.

  “What the hell do I look like, child? I’m a mountain man, not a ship’s steward. I guess they have the lumber ships sailing every day, but whether it’s to Peru or China I couldn’t say. If you go to that fair city, stay out of the Stumptown grog houses or you may wake up with blurry vision in the hold of a ship headed for who knows where. So many men get drugged and shanghaied in Portland, it ain’t even safe to drink the water, let alone the whiskey.”

  I drew myself up to my full height and slowly looked around the room. Nobody was going to like what I had to say.

  “Mr. Dodge can ride to the settlement and buy some supplies. When he returns I’ll escort Lucinda to Portland where she can embark for Monterey. The brothers will stay at the ranch and nurse Juan until I can get back.”

  There were dark looks all around. Dodge hadn’t agreed to bring any supplies, the Castro brothers hadn’t intended to stay in Oregon and Lucinda wasn’t looking for a tough horseback ride over unfamiliar territory with a swollen elbow. Juan was just happy to keep breathing, so nothing I said bothered him.

  “What if Mr. Dodge takes his bonus and meanders on up north to hunt beaver like he intended?” Dodge asked.

  “You can go hunt beaver. The money you were promised stays here until we get the supplies laid in,” I said.

  “Just a minute, Charlie. That wasn’t the deal.”

  Out of the corner of my eye I saw Lucinda draw in a breath. I shot her a look and prayed she would have enough sense not to antagonize Dodge. She caught my look and remained quiet. I turned and addressed Dodge.

  “I would have sent Juan for supplies, but he can’t travel. I don’t intent to let these cattle get driven off by Indians or drift off on their own until I understand the country. Some local men are supposed to be coming over with some bulls Topo bought. However, I have to find them and notify them we are here. Everyone here feels like their belly is kissing their back bone. I don’t think I have a choice but to send you for supplies. I want to know you will come back. I will give you the bonus when you return. That is my final word on the subject.”

  Dodge stood away from the porch, drew a deep breath and looked at his Henry Rifle leaning against the cabin wall. Lucinda got up and moved to the saddles lying on the ground. She glanced at the short barreled shotgun in its scabbard.

  “Now hold on, you poisonous Spanish bitch. Stay away from that damn scatter gun,” Dodge said. “I knowed it was you who buried that knife in that Injun from the blood on your sleeves. I had to pull like the devil to get the blade out where you stuck it in his breastbone. I know what you’re capable of. Just stay clear of that shotgun.”

  I didn’t think Dodge would pull a gun on me to get his money. I also didn’t believe Lucinda would shoot him, but violence seemed to develop quickly on this trip. I stepped between them.

  “We can’t let the boys taking care of the cattle starve, and we are out of salt and coffee. I would appreciate your continued help,” I said.

  “I’ve never run out on anyone I shared the trail with. I’ll go get the supplies, it just wasn’t part of the deal.”

  “Well, our business is settled then. We had better turn in.”

  Dodge muttered a good deal under his breath. The rest of the crew went and fixed their bed rolls.

  Dodge left the next morning before daylight with a list that Lucinda and the Castro's had drawn up. I gave him twice as much money as the supplies should have cost. I had no idea what the prices were at the settlement. I took one of the rifles and went hunting with no luck. Lucinda took the shotgun over to a small lake and came back with a duck, which she plucked and roasted over a spit. Without salt, the duck wasn’t very tasty. However, being hungry, we appreciated Lucinda’s efforts. At the end of the meal, Lucinda took some fat from the duck and make a broth for Juan. To everyone’s surprise, he kept it down.

  I spent the next two days riding around the country, trying to figure out where the boundaries were. On the second day, I found the ranch that sold Topo the bulls and arranged to receive them.

  On the third day, Dodge returned with the supplies. I made him draw out a detailed map to Portland. Then I gave him the gold Topo had promised him. I told the Castro brothers if my mare, Luna, was healthy and the heifers were accounted for, when I returned, I would give them four of my geldings. That brightened them up considerably.

  I drew Dodge to the side when Lucinda was busy doing something else.

  “What are the chances those Indians will be back for the cattle?”

  Dodge scratched his jaw and spit some chew. “You may lose a few this winter but the Indians around here are done. One more dose of Smallpox or Cholera and they will be like smoke in the wind. This year, or the next, the white man’s sickness will have done what the army can’t. I guess that is a good thing, because there isn’t much in the way of army troops up here and the ones stationed in the area don’t know the country,” he said.

  He looked down on me, and drew his lips back from his teeth. It was what passed for a smile from Dodge.

  “I came upon a chest of books some wagon train traveler abandoned on the trail west. I put them in a cave, out of the weather. When I get around to it, I’ll bring them to you. Unless you have something to do, sitting in a cabin in the winter can be hard on your nerves.’

  I thanked him for thinking of me. He continued to stare at me with a pained expression.

  “You ain’t a bad child, Charlie. You didn’t weaken when we drov
e those cattle through the mountains. You never hesitated when the Indians came to call. It is none of my business, but, cause I like you, I’ll say it anyway. You need to be careful around that girl. She has the scent of tears about her.”

  “She isn’t a bad woman.”

  “I killed a man over a woman like her thirty years ago. It’s why I hang my hat in Oregon rather than New York. Make sure that doesn’t happen to you.”

  While I thought his comment odd at the time, I didn’t take offense. We shook hands and Dodge continued on his journey North.

  The following morning, Lucinda and I took two saddle horses and one pack horse. We left the charming little compound and headed for Portland. We traveled hard because I wanted to get Lucinda on a ship and get back to the cattle with more supplies. I spent the night having nightmares about the various ways Topo’s heifers could disappear into the Oregon fog.

  Oregon was beautiful in its own way. It was green and wet. There was fog in the morning and sometimes rain in the afternoon, then the nights would be clear. I pushed our horses hard toward Portland. Lucinda never complained about the pace. She also made no comment about her arm, though each morning she did ask me to tie my neckerchief around her elbow so she could keep it still.

  On the day we came to a sure enough wagon road, Lucinda pulled up and massaged her elbow. We had been traveling at a trot the whole morning and the horses welcomed the rest.

  “You will accompany me to Monterey,” Lucinda said, as a statement of fact rather than a question that would acknowledge I might have some thoughts on the subject.

  “I had not planned on it. I want to get back to the cattle,” I replied. We hadn’t talked much on the trip and her commanding tone surprised me.

  “You are so worried about the cattle. Maybe you should worry about putting me alone on a ship full of strangers,” she said.

  “I considered that. I expect the sailors are big strong men who can take care of themselves.”

  “You joke at my expense?” she said.

  “Who’s joking? I can’t imagine a more dangerous woman than you.”

  “Even if you don’t want to see me home safely, or you are afraid of the ocean, you need to talk to my father. You need to let him know what has happened and find out what he wants to do. You need to get more money from him. You need to see what he has in mind if the bulls are not delivered and set up some sort of communication with him for the coming year.”

  “I told the Castro brothers I would be back. They are expecting me and I don’t want to let them down. Besides, I would hate to think their nephew got killed for nothing, which would be the case if we lose the cattle,” I replied. I got off my horse, turned my back and relieved myself. I had quit sneaking around behind a tree halfway through the trip. I figured there ought to be one advantage to being legally married. There didn’t seem to be many others.

  “The boy was killed, and that is a shame, but death is part of life out here. The cattle are not that important. They are only a way for my father to make money. Don’t make it more than that,” she replied.

  “You can tell Don Topo everything he needs to know. He can write me a letter. Thanks to you, I can nearly read enough to cypher what he says.” I fastened my fly, satisfied I had countered her reasons to return to Monterey. Of course, Lucinda had one more compelling argument.

  She climbed down off her horse. Lucinda still went behind the trees to relieve herself. When she returned, she stretched her legs by taking a hold of the saddle horn with her good arm and bending forward. She removed the cap from one of the wooden canteens that hung on her saddle horn and took a drink, then stepped away from the horse and looked up at me.

  “Come on the ship with me, Charlie. We can let God, rather than my father, decide if we should be husband and wife.”

  “How does that work?” I said and laughed at her unexpected pronouncement.

  “You want me, Charlie. You always have. Am I wrong?”

  “That aside, how does God decide for us?”

  “If I get pregnant, then God means for us to be together. If I don’t, then it wasn’t meant to be.”

  “Don’t women get pregnant when they sleep with men?”

  “I don’t intend to sleep very much.”

  She gave me an alluring smile while she waited for what she had said to sink in.

  “Are you sure you don’t want to go with me on the sailing ship? It might be better than you have imagined and I know you have imagined it a lot.”

  “If you feel that way, why wait till we get aboard a ship?” I asked, truly mystified.

  “I need a bath and to buy some decent undergarments. I want expensive perfume to put on my breasts and behind my ears. I am not a savage. I need a clean wooden floor to walk on and a bed and a bowl of water to wash in. Also, a few more days for my elbow to heal so I don’t scream in pain when you are deep inside me.”

  This was making me dizzy.

  “I still don’t understand. Why now? Anytime during the cattle drive, or back at the Chualar Cabin would have been fine with me. In the middle of a rainstorm or the fight with the Indians would have been fine with me. I don’t care how much dirt you had under your fingernails or how long it had been since you changed your laundry. None of that would have mattered.”

  “It matters to me, Charlie. In this instance, that is everything.”

  I crawled back on my horse, fully disgusted at my rising excitement.

  “Why is it what you want, is the only thing that matters? There may be more difficult women in the world, but I hope I never meet one.”

  “You got those men to do what you wanted. You rescued me from the Indians, Charlie. That changed things. I can’t keep from thinking about the way you killed the Indian when you were defending me.”

  Once again, Lucinda had forgot what actually happened. My exasperation bubbled over.

  “Remember the conversation in the tent when I was sick? What about the many reasons you didn’t want me?”

  “Women change their minds. You have been panting and lusting after me since we were children. Are you going to give up just as I surrender?” she said grinning.

  “There was no panting and damn little lusting,” I lied. “Have you ever asked nicely for something?”

  “When it comes to men, I’ve never needed to. Will you escort me to Monterey or not?” she asked. She knew I would and I didn’t understand her charade.

  “I’ll let you know when we get to Portland,” I replied and started the horse down the trail. She played along with my effort to retain some self-respect.

  “You are very strong, Charlie. Most men would jump at my offer,” I heard her say. Most of the time I helped Lucinda get on her horse, but now I was afraid to get that close to her after our conversation. I heard her grunt as she mounted.

  “I would like to think I am not most men. Anyway, you will probably get me shanghaied onto a ship that sails to Monterey by way of Valparaiso,” I said, and kicked my horse into a trot.

  Scent of Tears