Fallen Warrior (Fallen Trilogy book 3)

by Williams, Tess

  I didn't hesitate to start marching after him, and before I'd reached him, he started on.

  "How's your leg, today?" he asked, without turning around.

  "Fine. I could put most my weight on it."

  "And your arm's doing well enough?"

  I knew he meant the bandage I'd gotten rid of. I nodded, then said, "Yes," because he couldn't see me. Then I asked him, "By we did you mean you and Tosch? Because I didn't see him back by the camp."

  "Yes. I saw on my return, and he was already there." Silos rounded a corner of the rock, giving a fresh view of flat land walled by forest.

  Closest to us on the plain was Tosch, and beyond him, was something that was clearly what Silos had brought me to see. A herd of behemoths, at least a dozen. Un-surrounded by the structures of Akadia, they looked enormous, and they put the desert to shame glowing golden in the sun. They made up a mix of full-growns, and males and females—which Silos had explained to me already were defined by their color, females were reddish while the males were deeper purple—and there was a pair of little ones, now chasing each other in a playful circle.

  Silos let out a holler and I tried not to smile.

  The behemoths responded with a grogging chain of calls that sent Tosch laughing.

  "It's not the whole of them, of course," Silos said, "But if this many have gotten so far, it can only mean good news for the others." He wasted no time in walking straight towards them, while I stayed still with my arms crossed.

  "How are they doing?" I asked. "I mean, have you checked their legs and everything?"

  "For the poisoning?" he followed. He stopped right up under one of them, and rubbed a hand against it, then he pulled his fingers away and held them up to me. "Nothing there," he answered, with the air of one that already knew what his answer would be. I remembered the black powder that he had once lifted from the behemoth's wound, and supposed this was good news. "And will you look at their horns, Cyric?" he said. "See how bright they are. And the cracks..." He paused in his study to wave me over.

  My lips inched up a little, but I shook my head.

  "Blast it, boy, you'll come to touch one, or I'll run one of them over to you."

  Tosch swung his head back, and started walking towards me, with an obvious intent to force me as well.

  I was still smiling as I approached Silos and the behemoth—though I didn't feel it. The thing glanced me over from the side with one of its dark eyes, and then dropped its mouth to give a call.

  "See, they don't like me," I complained.

  Before I could tell, Silos had grabbed my hand and put it up against the behemoth's skin, into its shoulder. He held his hand over mine for a second, then he pressed his ear up close. "Feel its heartbeat? It's strong, no?"

  His smile was large and strange; I'd become accustomed to the way it broke suddenly across his face, otherwise he usually appeared solemn. But his excitement now was unlike what I'd seen from him before. My attention turned to the behemoth. The pack as a whole was shifting periodically, causing the ground to rumble, and the two little ones were still racing around, as tall as Tosch. But Silos was right, the heartbeat was strong. I could feel it, thumping through its shoulder.

  Silos jerked back suddenly from the behemoth, then put a hand carefully on my arm. "This can't be undone, Cyric. You'll remember this and be proud, always. You must be proud always."

  A swallow rolled down my throat, but Silos quickly moved on to examining the behemoth's face, as if he couldn't get enough of their improved state. And I backed away as it gave out a long huff.

  "I thought you said that they couldn't get better," I ventured. Tosch knocked his head into my arm and stayed there.

  Silos slid his thumb under the rim of the behemoth's eye, then sniffed his finger. "I didn't think they could," he answered. "From all I could tell, the poison that had infected their blood was causing their systems to fail. I tested sample after sample, and my remedies only slowed the affect. Once the cavern was opened up, they showed improvement, but again, only postponement, no restoration. And the young ones were the worst, but look at them."

  He stepped back and we all watched them race around their parents.

  "I can only assume that it must be a miracle of the granted. The sun, you remember, has been tied to the behemoths' lineage. Perhaps the extra hours under it was just enough—since it didn't reach the cavern for a full day. Perhaps getting away from the metals."

  "Do you still think it was lead that first infected them?"

  He nodded.

  I stared at them, while thinking of the soldiers in Akadia, the workers, and whether the poison would ever hurt them. "Maybe this means there's something that would help Kraehe, too," I said. "If I could only figure out what..." I didn't mean for my voice to sound ragged. Nowadays it always did. Silos had told me that it was because of the scarring. He responded to the especially strained tone now with a frown.

  "I think it would be of best help for all parties, not to do anything that required returning to Akadia. Not just for the behemoths, but for any form of life; its very stones are poison. If you want to help your dragon, I can't help but believe that you will need to find another path to do so."

  I could feel him watching me. He was waiting for me to nod, I was sure.

  But I didn't.

  #

  A number of days passed and the behemoths stayed grazing close. Tosch learned how to bait them into playing chase, which was all fun and games until the parents joined in, then Tosch's speed was the only thing that kept him untrampled.

  I got better, it seemed, all at once. One day I was nauseous and weak and the next I woke up starving. The last of my burns all settled to scars and I was able to start hunting with Silos. Or at least, learning to hunt with him—because he wouldn't actually kill anything himself. I told him that I didn't have to either, that I was happy enough with the roughage he collected—but he said it would be important for me to learn sooner or later, and since he knew it well, it only made sense.

  I was terrible at it. I'd never had to sneak around so much to face my target, and my feet were more accustomed to barreling around in boots then tiptoeing over leaves. Also my night-blindness made it impossible for me to hunt in the best hours for it.

  Along with hunting, Silos taught me to climb and find a branch and shoot a bow. He taught me to find plants he used for his medicines. He taught me to make a solid resting place in the treetops—though I assured him and was sure myself that I would never use it.

  These were all skills from his homeland and one day when we were resting out beside the river, after a swim, he brought up returning to his country before full winter hit.

  "It won't be as fair there, certainly, as the winters that I've grown accustomed to in the desert, but we're not so high as Shaundakul. Sometimes the season will pass without any snow."

  He was sitting on the rock across from me, fully dressed, with his legs crossed; while I had one of my legs stretched out into the water, and my other folded. The scar on my thigh was the worst one I had, and when I wasn't thinking, I usually ran my hand up and down it. I stopped doing so now. "What's the hurry, if the weather's better here?"

  He shook his head. "I wouldn't want to leave soon for the sake of climate. At the end of each year, in the dead of winter, the tribes have a celebration." He grew a half smile. "It's not the sort of event you'd want to miss by a moment. And it would give me the chance to see many of my old friends, not only those of my village." I watched him until he looked my way, then I turned my gaze down to the water. I took a deep breath, and stretched my hands back behind me.

  "So all of your tribes come together, then? Will you tell me what it's like?"

  "Oh, compared to what you're used to from Shaundakul or Akadia, I imagine it wouldn't seem like much."

  I laughed short. "I've had poor luck with parties in either of those countries. I think I'd prefer to hear if it's different."

  He paused, while I ignored the memory of silk unde
r my hand. Then his voice came paced and considerate. "It usually begins in the morning, unless one of the tribes is late in arriving. We try to come the night before so we won't miss out on any of the festivities—those visiting share tents, and many of the residents open up their huts to friends. At the start, a large breakfast is shared. Then the men partake in a competition of skills. The women choose which tasks and in what orders. We see who can climb the fastest, who can hide the longest. Who can balance one-legged on the top of tree stump before tiring. The children often do as well as the grown men in any number these. And then, of course, we have hand-to hand combat."

  "During a celebration?" I asked, a little skeptic. "What if someone gets hurt?"

  "He's the luckiest then. We're all kindred and try to keep from injuring one another. But if a man gets a bruise or a bad knock off his feet, then he wins a kiss from the maiden of his choosing. One of those unclaimed, of course."

  "So when you told me you weren't good at fighting, I suppose I shouldn't have felt so sorry for you. I see now why you don't want to wait till spring."

  Silos laughed a little, but I didn't look to see his reaction. I was matching his smile, but my mind was distant.

  "At night we have dancing and feasting—what you would expect from any celebration, but by then we've discovered each other once again. Like someone you forgot you knew, then you realize they're no stranger at all. After spending the day with the other tribes, you recall previous years of the same routine of events. It's a very full feeling, and it's felt amongst us all."

  When it was clear he was done, I asked, "You told me before about your brother. Would he be there?"

  "Cole?" Silos huffed. "He wouldn't leave Kanth if he was held at sword-point. In each retinue that I fall short in the ways of our people, he excels. His fighting skills, his love for hunting, even his contentment."

  "I would consider you pretty content."

  Silos inched his eyes tight. "I'm content when I'm nurturing life. Cole is content in Kanth. Maybe it's just that we're at peace when we're where we're meant to be. I think this year, though, that I will be as glad as him to be amongst our people."

  Silos turned his gaze to the forest and I did the same. I thought of the celebration he'd spoken of and what it would be like. Of life spent in the wilds, and hunting, and climbing.

  "It sounds like a good home," I told him. "I can see why you want to go back." I narrowed before speaking again, and my voice came out thicker than before. "Do you have a lot of foreigners there?" I asked.

  Silos hesitated, but I didn't look up to watch him. "There are some who live among us. From Carba and Zuta, as I said before, and even from your lands, I think. We're not so diverse as Akadia, but we don't consider the wilds our own. As it is open to the animals so it should be with man."

  I nodded. Then for a minute, we didn't speak. I could still feel him watching me though, waiting for me to voice my thoughts. I leaned back off my arms, then hunched over towards the water. I knocked my thumbs together absently as I watched the river, then I spoke, and I tried not to narrow, but I thought I did anyways. "Did you ever see Ellia when she was in Akadia, Silos?"

  I waited for him to respond. But not for very long.

  "I know you were there at the same time, but you were underground a lot."

  I checked his face. When he shook his head, I looked back down.

  "You wouldn't have forgotten if you had," I said with conviction. "You know how they say, in songs and stories and things, how the princess is always beautiful?" I didn't wait for him to respond this time, I just nodded my head once. "Ellia's beautiful like that. The sort of beautiful that makes it hard to believe she's real when you're looking at her. It's just a part of who she is. It always has been."

  I couldn't look away from the water, but I couldn't keep my jaw from gripping either. I stood up so suddenly my leg hitched, but I ignored it and moved to the edge of the rock. Then I jumped down and went inside the tent.

  #

  Silos didn't leave me alone for long after that. And by late that night, we were already fighting over whether I would leave with him or not.

  "Why shouldn't I go? I can climb, and I'm learning to hunt. It's as good a place for me as anywhere."

  Silos gave a tsk. "Kanth holds nothing for you. You can't run from your future."

  "I'm not running from anything. You said it yourself, I can't help Kraehe. And I did everything else I could. I can't go back to Akadia, I can't even enter Karatel."

  "These are not the places where you should think of going," he stressed, shaking his head.

  I took a heavy breath, then I turned around, away from him. "You don't understand. I can't go to Yanartas.... I don't even know how to get there."

  "After everything, you'll let that stop you?"

  "It's not just that."

  "You mean what you spoke of earlier? Cyric, I may not have met your princess, but if she's the type of woman to lead you to save the behemoths, or to save her dragon, if she's any of the things you've said of her, then it won't matter."

  I felt a surge of pressure in my chest, and I couldn't stand still.

  "Unless you've misrepresented her nature..."

  "No. She's perfect. She's wonderful."

  "Then you'll have to think of a better justification," he argued. "There's no sense in it."

  I had my hands pressed up to the sides of my head now. I was trying to find the words that would convince Silos that what he was saying just wasn't possible. If it was, of course I would go, but I couldn't. I just couldn't.

  He huffed a breath. "Are you so afraid, boy?" he asked.

  I felt a scoff in my throat, then I turned on him. "Is that hard to believe? This isn't the first time I've come up against following her there. I watched her leave me to go find them before. And I wanted to go. I would have, if..." I turned in exasperation, thinking that he should know; soldiering I could do, and maybe pull of a short stint in heroics. But I hadn't even succeeded at that! "I've already ruined everything else. I'm not going to ruin this."

  "Why are you so certain that you would? Perhaps you followed the wrong path in Akadia, but you accomplished what you meant to. You joined an army at the height of its assembly. You became a lieutenant."

  "Those things were easy," I said. "Why do you think I did them? I was tired of fighting. Lox made it easy."

  "So, what now. Aren't you saying that you'll do what's easiest again?"

  I stretched my arms out to him. "Look at me. Do you think anything I do is going to be easy?" I narrowed, and shook my head, hearing my own voice crack when I spoke. "I don't want to be in pain anymore. I've been happy here in the desert these past weeks. I've been at peace. My whole life, I've never been at peace. Why shouldn't I be allowed to have that?"

  Silos scoffed. Then his eyes went deep, swimming with emotion while he watched me. It was the expression he saved for his animals when they were suffering, not pity, more like he'd been heartbroken himself. "Cyric...if I thought that you could find peace in Kanth, then I would gladly choose for you to come there. I don't care so much for kingdoms and wars as a man finding the place that will give him health. But I've heard the path of your life, and the reasons you followed them. I've know the cries of your dreams, yes? No sooner would the behemoths be able to find health underground, or me away from my care of life, or my brother away from his homeland, than you could leave these battles behind." He paused, only long enough to narrow his brows low. "Have you not considered that this princess of yours likely believes you to be dead, Cyric?" His expression didn't lose any of its empathy, while my body fell still.

  It wasn't that I hadn't thought about that; it was just that I couldn't. Like Yanartas, it was just too much. It meant too much. I saw the tears she'd shed for my murdering father, and I heard her crying for me as I'd run back towards the top of the Akadian palace—where she'd likely expected I would die. I remembered these things and I couldn't bear to think. Then I'd know how much pain she was in, and then I
would want—more than I already did—to go to her, and comfort her, and promise everything to her.

  But I was still Cyric Dracla. I had nothing to promise her. I never had, and now I had even less. She'd already always deserved better than me. Maybe now if she saw me, she would realize it.

  But that was something I couldn't bear.

  I felt my pulse racing. The sight and smell of the tent was abrasive to me. I wished I hadn't told Silos so many things. I wished he hadn't heard me calling for Ellia, and that I couldn't see it when I looked at him.

  I turned away, moving towards the exit of the tent, then for just a moment, I stopped and let in the idea of actually standing in front of Ellia.

  I tried just as quickly to close it off—and I felt as powerless as I did in my hours of endless pain. I shook my head, my back still to Silos. "I don't know how to fight like this," I said.

  The words sounded so true, even from my own mouth, that it was enough to set my decision.

  #

  The next day, Silos and I barely spoke, but it only lasted that long, and then he accepted I was going with him, and we began to talk of Kanth, its land, and laws, and the sort of home I might have to build for myself, or what clothes I would wear.

  Half a week before we were meant to leave, I took Tosch out for a night ride and gave him a stern talking to. I regretted the hours I'd spent detailing childhood memories between Ellia and I—whenever I got on his back, he immediately attempted to head for the ocean. I tried to explain that things just weren't always so simple for humans, but in the end, I had to threaten to trade him in for a horse.

  Silos left for word from the cities the afternoon before we were set to leave. I spent the day taking down the camp. We'd planned to sleep outside that night, so that we could get in an early start. The following morning was an especially warm one, and the sun rested low and orange over the desert by the time we were ready to leave.

  We were both dressed as true Kanthains, head to foot, which was how I decided that I would remain in Kanth to keep from becoming a curiosity. It was probably why I felt so warm. The black cloth wrapped around my arms, legs, and over my head, tucking into black boots at my ankles. The small leather sort that made it easy to cross silent in the forests. Silos stopped at the side of his wagon, and I gave him a hand up to mount it, more or less lifting his small frame on my own.