by Pratt, Lulu
We had always been like brothers, much closer than friends. And I’d betrayed him in the worst way. How could I ever regain his trust? The guilt of it all was becoming too heavy to carry.
“I guess I always knew Charlotte liked you,” he shrugged. It was obvious she had a crush on me growing up. Although we’d never discussed it, I figured he knew. “I just never thought anything would come from it.”
“Me neither,” I admitted. “When I moved back, I never in a million years thought something like this could happen.”
We paused, using the food as an excuse to take a break. I didn’t want to share the details of how me and Charlotte had begun dating, but I needed Marshall to know how I felt about his sister. Far from a fling, I was deeply connected to her and only wanted to give her the best.
“Charlotte kind of set me straight in the car,” he smirked, reaching for a fork. I listened on closely at the sound of her name.
“What did she say?” I asked.
“She told me I’m not her dad,” he smirked again, glancing across the table at me. “Said I don’t get to dictate her life or stop her from following her heart.”
He looked directly at me as he said the last sentence, as though we both knew she must be confused. I could tell Marshall still didn’t understand things between me and Charlotte. He was still concerned that she might be the one who fell hard, when in fact it was me.
“Ford, I know how you are with girls,” he continued, but this time I interrupted him.
“This is nothing like anything in my past, Marshall. The first time I came over when I moved back, I saw Charlotte and was blown away. She’s the most beautiful woman I’ve ever seen. I couldn’t believe the girl who used to look at me with smitten eyes and a schoolgirl crush had grown into such a stunning woman. That said, I didn’t plan for any of this to happen. But… I fell, bro. Hard. The last thing you should worry about is me hurting her. I don’t ever want to be without her. I’m in love with your sister.”
None of it was in my prepared speech. I had no intention of professing my love, especially since I hadn’t even told Charlotte I was in love with her. But I couldn’t stand the thought of Marshall fearing I would break her heart, something I would never let happen.
“Man,” Marshall shook his head before taking a bit of chili. “I just never thought I would hear you talk about any woman this way.”
I smiled, thinking the same thing. I was never the romantic type and never saw myself falling in love. All of that changed with Charlotte. She had completely revamped my vision for my life and what happiness looked like.
“In a strange way, I’m glad it’s for my sister,” he huffed at the statement like he couldn’t believe his ears. I surely couldn’t.
“Really?” I asked, chuckling at how far we’d come since he was pummeling me into the wall at my house.
“Yeah,” he confirmed, his face growing more serious. “I always wanted you to find a girl who changed the way you thought about love. And I always wanted my sister to find a man who treated her better than anyone else. I guess I got both, just in a way I never expected.”
“Yeah, I guess so,” I nodded slowly, realizing how true it was.
“So, let me have it. How upset is Charlotte with me?” he asked before digging into his food.
“What do you mean?”
“I haven’t seen her since we stopped at the mall after leaving your place. She walked off and she hasn’t come home in two days. I figure she’s been talking nonstop about how I’m an overprotective nutcase,” he chuckled with a mouthful of spaghetti.
“I haven’t seen or heard from her since you two left my place either,” I said slowly, gaining his attention immediately. “She won’t take my calls,” I added, not bothering to hide the sadness in my tone.
“She must be staying at Jackie’s,” he assured me. “Don’t worry, I’ll talk to her.”
It was much more than I’d ever expected. Not only was Marshall okay with me dating his sister, he was willing to talk to her about taking me back. At least, that was what I hoped for. The days without her had been brutal. I didn’t want to lose the best thing that had ever happened to me before I could even tell her how I felt about her.
Chapter 35
CHARLOTTE
“I JUST DON’T get why you’re ignoring Ford. It’s like you’re punishing him when he didn’t really do anything wrong.” Jackie’s words rang true, though they weren’t the ones I wanted to hear.
I didn’t know what to say. Did we need to formally break up because my brother was determined to ruin our relationship before it could really get started? That thought was too devastating, so I’d pushed it to the back of my mind. Focusing on work had been my only saving grace, which was why I was decorating a cake while talking to Jackie – it was my therapy.
“My fairy tale turned into a soap opera,” I explained while preparing a decorating bag of light pink buttercream icing. “I can’t focus at work and deal with all of this, so I chose the one that’s less stressful.”
“You mean, you’ve been avoiding the one that’s more difficult, and decorating cakes to pass the time?” she asked sarcastically.
“What can he possibly have to say? That I should’ve listened to him and let him talk to Marshall so none of this would have happened?” I asked the question that had been circling my mind.
Why didn’t I just listen to him and let him talk to my brother? I was so worried about protecting our romance, I didn’t consider how disastrous things could end. My fairy tale was crushed long before my happily ever after.
“Speaking of talking to Marshall,” Jackie said, biting her bottom lip. I’d been staying at her house for the past three days, avoiding my brother. Thankfully, his schedule was set in stone this week, so it was easy to predict when he would be home. Every day, we would come over so I could bake and decorate a cake as I was now, leaving long before he would be returning from work.
“I know,” I rolled my eyes before focusing on the cake. “I need to face that problem too.”
It was more than I could handle. Not only had I lost my boyfriend, but I’d been mean and hurtful to my brother as well. I cringed thinking of the way I spoke to him in the parking lot of the mall. Of course, I had meant everything I said, but I didn’t need to yell it at the top of my lungs. The hurt on his face was ingrained in my memory, and had kept me up most nights.
I didn’t mean to upset him, but so much built-up frustration had overflowed without my consent. It was the culmination of many events, rather than a reaction solely to the way that he had barged into Ford’s house.
“If there’s one thing I know about stress, it’s that it’s never as bad as it seems.” Jackie smiled, reaching across the kitchen island to rub my shoulder.
Jackie had been my complete support system through all the drama in my life. She’d stayed up late with me, listening and re-listening to the same stories over and over as I tried to make sense of them. Every day, she came to take me to lunch, which she said was for girl time, but I knew she wanted to make sure I was eating. And I was certain, if she hadn’t taken me, I would have worked right through the lunch hour, trying to keep my thoughts at bay.
Before I could tell her how much I valued her friendship and how she had looked out for me, the front door opened. Jackie’s eyes locked with mine as the realization set in. There was only one person that it could be, and neither of us wanted to face my brother. Jackie was worried he would be upset with her for allowing me to stay with her, rather than coming home. And I wasn’t ready to continue our loud confrontation.
“Hi, Marshall,” Jackie spoke softly as he entered the kitchen.
“Hi, Jackie. How are you?” he asked, his tone unreadable.
“I’m good. I was just leaving. I’ll see you later.” She shot me a confused look, and I nodded my understanding that she would leave so quickly.
Marshall sat down on her abandoned barstool as she let herself out. Just as I had the past couple days, I
focused on the cake in front of me rather than my brother. Though this time he was right in front of me.
“You were right,” he said clearly.
I glanced up, unsure of what kind of trick he was playing. Marshall was known to flip my words around, making me think one thing before the lesson came and taught me an entirely different scenario. So, I stayed silent, focusing on the cake.
“I can’t control your life. Especially not if this is where it leads. We haven’t spoken in two days,” his voice cracked at the recollection. It was subtle, but I noticed it, glancing up as he continued.
“Do you remember the summer camp you went to after eighth grade? It was supposed to be in preparation for high school,” he asked.
“Yeah, Jackie and I pretended not to know each other so we could be roommates.” I allowed myself a small smile.
The goal of the camp was to meet new people and build new friendships, but I wanted to share a room with my best friend. We lived in a tiny dorm room and stayed up late every night, talking until the sun came up. It was the first time I’d felt comfortable since my parents passed away.
“That was the worst summer of my life. I hated being away from you for so long.” He chuckled, and I wondered if he realized how unbelievable it was. Marshall was the one who signed me up for the camp, claiming he needed some alone time to be a kid himself.
“I thought I wanted you away. For a day or two, I enjoyed the time by myself. I hung out with my friends and didn’t think about how you would get home or if you had homework. But nights were hard. I stayed up wondering if you were okay. I worried if you had made friends, or if I’d pushed you into something you didn’t want to do.”
His voice was soft and reflective, his eyes glassy like he was replaying the emotions of the story in his heart. It was more vulnerable than I was used to seeing my brother.
“I had a calendar with a countdown until the day you returned. Every morning, I’d wake up and check to see how much longer I had without you. And when you got back, I hugged you so tight, I thought I might break you,” he said, laughing at the memory.
“I remember that,” I glanced up from the cake. “You crushed me so hard with your hug. It was nice to feel missed.” He was looking at his hands, but he looked up for an instant and nodded before continuing.
“I think that’s where it began – this need to have tabs on you and make sure you were on the right track. I never meant to control your life. I just didn’t want to ever lose you. We lost our parents, and you’re all I’ve got.” He looked to me. I could feel his eyes on me.
Gently, I placed the bag of icing down to give my brother the attention he deserved. “Marshall, you stepped in and raised me half of my life. You’ve been like a father figure to me for longer than Dad was.” I paused, seeing the emotion shift on his face as I softened my voice. “But you’re not my dad. You’re my big brother. And there’s a great relationship for us to have there, without you being in charge of me. I don’t want to be afraid to tell you anything about my life. I should be able to talk to you about everything, but that’s not the case now.”
“I know. I’m sorry for overstepping so many boundaries and being too controlling. I know you’re right about that,” he sighed deeply, exhaling loudly. “And I know you really do have feelings for Ford. But how are you two ever going to work out if you won’t take his calls?”
My mind blanked, certain I’d misheard him. How could he possibly know I hadn’t been taking Ford’s calls? And why did he care about us working it out? I was speechless.
“You do want things to work out with him, don’t you?” he asked, confirming that I had in fact heard him correctly.
“You want me to be with Ford?” I asked, my breath labored as I awaited his response.
“I want you to be happy. And as far as men go, I don’t know a better one than Ford. The whole thing was just… shocking. Ford has never been the relationship type, so I had all kinds of fears about you getting hurt. But after talking to him, I think I’ll need to worry more about you breaking his heart than the other way around,” he huffed, smirking.
“You talked to him?” I asked, wondering how Ford was doing.
“Yeah, we had lunch. I figured you’d want to talk to him too.” He placed his car keys on the kitchen island. “I decided to take a few days off work, so you can use my car to drive out to his place.”
“Are you serious? You support us?” I asked, feeling the tears sting at the corners of my eyes. I never thought I’d hear the words from him.
“Yes, Charlotte. Now, take the keys and go put that sad man out of his misery,” he said.
I was wrapping my arms around him before he got the last word out. This time, it was me squeezing him so hard I feared he would break. After kissing his cheek, I rushed to the door, forgetting my cake and everything else to get to Ford.
Chapter 36
FORD
AN ALERT ON my phone distracted me from the never-ending task of unpacking. I’d gone through a room of boxes just trying to keep myself busy so I wouldn’t have to worry about how my life had flipped in a matter of days. At least I’d repaired things with Marshall, which was half the battle. Thankfully, he was on my side now, but I hadn’t heard a word from Charlotte.
It had been days without so much as a text, leading me to believe the future for us was bleak. Spending too much time trying to see things from her perspective, I’d given up on trying to make sense of why she was ignoring me. I hated to think that she was mad at me, but there didn’t seem to be any other explanation for her absence after Marshall had changed his stance.
The text was from Sam, asking a quick question about an ongoing issue with one of the team members who was asking for an extended leave of absence. I texted back quickly, wishing it had been Charlotte instead.
Returning to the packing, I began going through the boxes again. First, I finally unpacked my TV, setting it on the stand I’d unpacked earlier. Next, I found one of the boxes labeled “books” and began stacking them on the shelf beneath the TV.
Mixed in with the books were a few pictures from my time in Minneapolis. Holding one photo in my hand, I felt like I was looking at a stranger. I could still remember the night, a gala hosted by a marketing firm that did business at the airport. We always got invited to fancy events, which I always guessed was for preferential treatment down the line.
In the photo, I was wearing a black suit with a bow tie, nothing like my normal attire. A small smile curled the edge of my lips at the memory. As everything had fallen apart in the past few days, I couldn’t help but to question if I’d made the right decision moving home.
Nothing was perfect in Minneapolis, but as I looked at myself in the photo, I remembered the good times. Working so many hours made my colleagues feel like friends, and even outside of work we would hang out regularly. Two of my co-workers stood on either side of me in the photo, their arms draped over my shoulder.
I could still remember the fun night, up until a certain point. That was how most of my memories in Minnesota were. I partied hard, and most weekend mornings, I couldn’t exactly remember what had happened the night before. It was a fast few years in my life, and I hoped they wouldn’t be the best to come.
When I’d first moved back to Cincinnati, I thought everything was going to shape up, and fast. I had friends and family here, and always knew what to do and where to go. For the brief time with Charlotte, it really felt like I’d made the right decision, starting the life I’d always wanted.
But things didn’t last, and now I was questioning everything. Throwing the photo back into the box, I moved on to the kitchen, opening the boxes lining the counters. A knock at the door caught my attention and I wondered if it was Marshall coming by to see me again under happier circumstances.
Opening the door, my heart skipped a beat at the sight of Charlotte. Even more beautiful than I remembered, she pushed her hair behind her ears nervously.
“Ford, I know you’re probably ma
d at me for not answering your calls,” she blurted out, obviously nervous. “I just didn’t know what to say if we can’t be together. I didn’t even want to consider having to ‘just be friends’ or anything less than what we had. Marshall just told me you two talked, and I just wanted to see if we could possibly try again.”
I couldn’t believe my ears. All this time I’d thought she was mad at me, and here she was assuming I was the one mad at her. I couldn’t bring myself to respond with words. Instead, I wrapped my arms around her, pulling her inside the house. She smelled like lavender, and I inhaled deeply, never wanting to forget her beautiful scent.
“So, you’re not mad at me?” she asked.
Slightly releasing my grip around her, I lifted her chin with my fingertip so I could stare into her big blue eyes. “Charlotte, I could never be mad at you. I’m in love with you.”
She gasped, her cheeks instantly blushing, but she didn’t look away. “I love you too, Ford,” she said. The words hit me like a ton of bricks, in the best way. Lifting onto her toes, she offered her lips, and I indulged without hesitation. It had been too long since I tasted her sweetness. I devoured her hungrily as I lift her to make our way to the bedroom.
Charlotte was greedy, tearing at my T-shirt before we reached the bedroom. Matching her excitement, I tugged at her shirt and then the jean shorts she wore before falling to the bed with her. In my mind, I wanted the moment to be sensual and romantic, but the urgency between us wouldn’t allow for it.
We were rushed with desperation, each of us missing the other so badly nothing felt right until I slid deep inside her. She moaned with satisfaction in my ear, and I paused, wanting to remember the incredible sensation of pleasing her.
Slowly, I lifted myself, sliding back in as Charlotte’s ankles locked on the small of my back. Our bodies collided in a choreography we’d mastered, our moans of pleasure serving as the soundtrack. Charlotte’s fingers gripped my hair as I stretched her tightness, drilling into her with all the passion I thought I’d lost.