Camilla's Conscience

by Sandra Heath

  Camilla heard him cross the hall, and hurried out from the library. “I—I must speak with you.”

  He halted, and for a moment couldn’t face her. But at last he turned, forcing a brief smile. “Yes?”

  “In the library, it’s more private.”

  “What is it?” he asked as she closed the library door behind them.

  “Sophie did know we were following her. Mary came to me a short while ago. It seems Sophie caught a glimpse of us and so waited deliberately at the bridge.”

  “Well, we guessed as much.”

  “There’s more. She was prepared for the possibility, and so she had another note with her which she hid on the bridge parapet just before we rode out of the woods. She told Mary that William was actually watching us from somewhere close by, and would have retrieved the note the moment we left.”

  He was incredulous. “Are you saying de Marne was there all the time?”

  “Mary says so.”

  “Do we know yet where he’s actually staying?”

  “No.”

  He gave an angry sigh. “Do we at least know what Sophie’s note said?”

  “No, we don’t. Sophie didn’t tell Mary.”

  “Are we really expected to believe that? If Sophie told Mary so much, I’m very skeptical indeed that she didn’t say everything,” he replied scornfully.

  “I think it’s the truth. You see, when Sophie didn’t volunteer anything about what she’d written, Mary made the mistake of asking her. Mary’s afraid she aroused Sophie’s suspicions. Anyway, nothing more was said.”

  Resignedly he tossed his gloves and riding crop on to a table, and then counted the adverse points on his fingers. “So we now have three things to contend with. One, de Marne is still waiting his moment in some hidey-hole, two, Sophie is well and truly on her guard, and three, we have absolutely no idea at all what her next move is to be.”

  “I’m afraid so.”

  “Then we’ll just have to be more hawkish than ever, and Mary will certainly have to keep us minutely informed.”

  “She will, I’m sure.”

  “I wish I’d never heard of Sophie Arenburg, and that’s a fact.”

  Camilla went to the window. “I feel the same, but we’ve managed to acquire responsibility for her.”

  “I had her foisted upon me, you must have been moonstruck to volunteer.”

  She smiled a little. “Possibly.” She glanced at him. “Where did you go when you left Sophie and me?”

  “Just for a ride,” he replied evasively.

  She searched his face and knew he was lying. “Dominic, if you know something, I’d prefer it if you told me.”

  For the space of a heartbeat he was tempted to tell her everything, if only to ease his own load, but as he saw the earnest look in her eyes, he knew he still couldn’t. He had to leave her with her illusions. God rot the soul of dear departed Harry!

  “I don’t know anything, Camilla. I thought perhaps de Marne might be in a house I remembered, but it was deserted.” He went to the door, and then looked back at her. “How remiss we’ve both been, my lady, so far forgetting our feud as to address each other by first names.”

  She lowered her eyes and he went out, but paused again on the other side of the door. He didn’t want to hurt her, but he felt as taut as a bowstring. Sooner or later the arrow had to fly, and when it found its mark Lady Camilla Summerton’s treasured memories would be shattered. But so would his own dreams.

  Chapter 15

  In her dreams that night Camilla was with Harry again. They were making love in the bed where she slept now, and their lips burned passionately together as their pleasure intensified. But then his mouth became harsh and cruel as he thought only of himself.

  Her joy was obliterated by the savagery of his selfish thrusts, but she couldn’t cry out her pain because his lips were forced so imperatively over hers. He was stifling her, stopping her very breath! She tried to pull away, but he was too strong.

  Fear replaced ecstasy, and she began to struggle. The more she struggled, the more she was constrained into subjection, but then she realized she wasn’t asleep anymore. She was wide awake, and a hand was clamped over her mouth as someone held her down!

  “In God’s name be still, Camilla!” Dominic hissed.

  She froze, and stared up at him. He was fully dressed, and obviously hadn’t been to bed at all.

  He kept his hand over her mouth. “Are you going to be quiet?” he asked softly.

  Slowly she nodded, and he took his hand away. “That’s better.”

  She sat up fearfully, clutching the bedclothes to her throat. “Why are you here? What do you want?”

  “Not for what you appear to think. Sophie’s up and about when she shouldn’t be. I’ve been watching from the room opposite her apartment, and heard the moment she opened her door. She’s just gone downstairs. Be quick, or we’ll lose her.” He thrust her cloak into her hands.

  Collecting her scattered thoughts, Camilla slipped from the bed. His glance lingered on her legs, then he looked at her face. “I’m consumed with curiosity as to the nature of your dreams a moment or so ago,” he murmured, remembering how sensuously she’d moaned in her sleep before he’d awakened her.

  She flushed, but he didn’t see as he went to the window and held the curtain aside to look out. It was a cold moonlit night, and the terrace was clearly visible below. “I have a sixth sense she’ll go to the Chinese garden,” he murmured. “There she is now! She’s just crossing the terrace from the conservatory.”

  Camilla hastily put on her little ankle boots and joined him in time to see Sophie’s cloaked figure fleeing down the terrace steps to the parterre. Dominic smiled as he saw which way she went across the grass. “It’s the Chinese garden all right, and that has to mean the pagoda,” he muttered, hurrying Camilla toward the door.

  It was a cloudless night, and bitterly cold. The landscape sparkled with frost, and the park might have been fashioned from silver. Owls hooted in the woods and a vixen shrieked from somewhere toward the village as they followed Sophie swiftly across the grounds. The bell of Summerton church sounded. It was two o’clock.

  Camilla was quite out of breath when they at last reached the edge of the Chinese garden. The pagoda pierced the starry heavens, its wind chimes silent on such a still night, but the splash of the cascading stream carried clearly as they paused beneath an almond tree that was weighed down with blossoms. They could see Sophie making her way up beside the waterfall, following the winding stone path that led to the foot of the pagoda.

  Suddenly she hesitated and glanced directly toward them. They were well hidden, but Dominic instinctively drew Camilla farther back beneath the almond tree. Sophie continued to stare in their direction, and Camilla’s heart began to quicken. Had she realized they were there again? But then Sophie hurried up the steps, and Dominic held a branch aside to watch for a moment before he and Camilla emerged.

  Petals showered over her as he released the branch. “Come on,” he said, catching her hand and leading her toward the steps. His fingers were warm in spite of the bitterly cold night, and she was very conscious of his touch, especially since in a moment they’d pass the hollow fringed with bamboo, where the picnic had taken place.

  She averted her eyes, but she could still see Harry lying asleep on the grass, and Dominic, so charming and irresistible as he persuaded her to go to the pagoda with him. They’d gone hand in hand up this path, just as they were doing now ... Guilt had walked with her on that day, for she’d known exactly what she was doing. If Harry hadn’t awoken and called...

  The memory was so sharp now that she snatched her hand away from Dominic’s, but breaking the contact didn’t absolve her of responsibility for the past. She’d gone more than willingly into the arms of her husband’s best friend, and the unfulfilled passion had preyed upon her conscience ever since. Perhaps it would do so forever.

  Sophie reached the pagoda entrance and went inside. Dismayed, C
amilla caught Dominic’s arm. “The door is supposed to be locked because the stairs are dangerous! We must stop her!”

  He stared at her for a second, and then began to run toward the pagoda. He called, and his voice echoed around the garden until it was lost in the noise of the water, but Sophie didn’t reappear.

  Camilla hurried after him, but as they ran the final few yards to the entrance, Sophie suddenly came out. Her hands were pressed to her mouth and her eyes were large and round. She gave a cry and burst into tears when she saw them.

  “Oh, Lady Camilla! Lord Ennismount! William is dead!”

  “Dear God,” Dominic breathed and dashed inside, where he found William lying among the shattered fragments of the banister and handrail that had given way when he’d climbed to the floor above. Dominic knelt down to feel his pulse.

  Sophie watched anxiously, and hysteria suddenly seized her. “Oh, William! William! What shall I do now? What shall I do now?”

  Camilla put her arms around her, afraid to offer words of comfort in case Sophie’s worst fears were realized.

  Dominic looked up. “It’s all right, Sophie, he’s not dead, he just knocked himself out when he fell.”

  But Sophie was beyond reason. Sob after sob rose uncontrollably in her throat and Camilla had to shake her. “Sophie! Listen to me! William isn’t dead!”

  The girl’s breath caught, and she stared at her.

  Camilla spoke more gently. “William isn’t dead,” she said again.

  Tears filled Sophie’s eyes. “You are telling the truth?”

  “Of course I am.”

  “Oh, Lady Camilla!” Sophie gave her a quick hug and then hastened over to William. She knelt down and took his head to cradle it in her lap. “Oh, William! William! Speak to me, please!”

  Dominic put a warning hand on her shoulder. “Have a care, for we don’t know if he has any broken bones.”

  William groaned and began to stir, then his eyes opened. He gazed up into Sophie’s anxious face, “Sophie ...”

  “Oh, William, mon âme, mon coeur...” She bent to smother his face with kisses.

  Dominic looked at William’s pale face. “Can you move your head?”

  “I—I think so ...”

  William managed to turn his head from side to side, and Dominic gave him a wry glance. “Well, at least you haven’t broken your idiotic neck.”

  “I’m sorry to disappoint you,” William replied, but then winced as he tried to move his leg. “My ankle ...!”

  “Let me have a look.” Dominic carefully tried to pull William’s boot off, but the injured man gave a cry of pain.

  “Dear God, no!”

  Sophie’s tender heart ached for him, and fresh tears filled her lilac eyes as she stroked his hair and whispered lovingly.

  Dominic inspected the boot. “I’m afraid this will have to be cut off when we get you back to the house,” he warned.

  “But Hoby made them!” William protested.

  “Hard luck,” Dominic answered unfeelingly, and then straightened to look up at the broken banister. “You’re fortunate it happened before you’d gone too far, a little higher and you might not have survived the fall. As to the consequences if Sophie had been the one to fall...”

  “I’d never have allowed her to climb the stairs, I could see they weren’t all they should be,” William replied.

  “Then more fool you for going up them at all!” Dominic replied trenchantly.

  “Thanks,” William answered offendedly.

  “You don’t expect sympathy, do you? You gave your word you’d go to Scotland and stay away from Sophie, but here you are.”

  “It’s the only time in my life I’ve broken my word.”

  “Correction, it’s at least the second time.”

  William looked at him in puzzlement. “Second?”

  “You gave your word to Alice Penshill, didn’t you? Or has that now slipped your mind completely?” Without waiting for William to reply, Dominic got to his feet and turned to Camilla. “Can you take Sophie back to the house and then have some men bring a stretcher?”

  “Yes, of course.”

  “I think we can be reasonably sure the ankle is his only injury, so is there someone in Summerton who sets bones? I seem to remember the blacksmith ...?”

  “Jem Clayton? Yes, I’ll send for him.”

  She nodded and put her hand on Sophie’s shoulder. “Come on, we’ll go back to the house.”

  But Sophie shook her head. “I wish to stay with William, Lady Camilla.”

  “It’s better that you come to the house with me.”

  “No!” St. Petersburg surged to the fore.

  Dominic’s patience finally snapped, and he seized her hand and dragged her to her feet. “Do as you’re told, miss!” he said shortly, steering her out into the night.

  “You cannot do this! I am the czar’s ward!” she cried furiously.

  “Czar’s ward or not, I’ll put you over my damned knee if you defy me any more! I’m sick to death of your conduct, which has certainly not been that of a lady, and which I’m sure you don’t really wish the czar and the grand duchess to hear about. Well, I’m now of a mind to tell them exactly how disreputably you’ve behaved, and I’m also greatly tempted to spill the beans to the Earl of Highnam.”

  Sophie gasped. “No!”

  “Give me one good reason why not.”

  “Because it happened when I was under your protection! Because I will say all sorts of things about the Prince Regent, the government, and—”

  “Enough! Just think about the consequences to your own reputation, mademoiselle. If you wish to be regarded as no better than you should be, then so be it!”

  Sophie’s face went pale in the moonlight, and without another word she began to hurry away down the path.

  Camilla gazed after her and then looked reproachfully at him. “Did you have to be quite so harsh? She’s very upset about William, and—”

  “I’m not in any mood for your bleeding heart, Camilla. That young woman chose the wrong moment to adopt her Romanov arrogance!”

  “Romanov? So she is the czar’s—?”

  “Leave it, Camilla, for I really haven’t the patience right now. I’m tired of this whole damned business, so just go after her and see she’s all right, then keep her out of my way!”

  She nodded, but then hesitated. “I—I think I’ll have to send for Elizabeth,” she said.

  “Whatever for?”

  “She should be here.”

  “Leave her in London,” he replied shortly.

  “I promised I’d send for her if anything untoward happened, and this is definitely untoward.”

  His eyes were cool in the moonlight. “I’d prefer it if you didn’t send for her, but I can’t stop you.”

  “No, you can’t.”

  His lips twisted angrily. “There have been many times when I should have prevailed with you, Camilla, and the one that comes to mind most clearly of all was the last occasion we were here at this pagoda. I should have made you mine then, and to hell with your conscience and with Sir Harry Bloody Summerton!”

  Suddenly he put his hand to her chin, pinching with his fingers as he made her look at him. “I vow this, madam, if there’s a third occasion when you and I find ourselves here, I’ll finish what was so rudely interrupted before. Now get away from here and attend to your chaperonely duties!” He thrust her roughly away and then went back to William.

  Shaken by his suppressed fury, and trembling with more than just the cold, Camilla gazed after him for a moment before gathering her skirts to follow Sophie.

  Chapter 16

  William had spent the previous night in a barn, an experience that hadn’t permitted much comfort or rest, so that when his ankle had been attended to, and he was warm and comfortable, he immediately fell into a deep sleep.

  But if he felt relaxed enough to sleep, Sophie most certainly didn’t. Dominic’s harsh words at the pagoda seemed to have at last made her r
ealize the extent of her transgression. She paced anxiously up and down in the candlelit drawing room, twisting her handkerchief in her hands as all the worst possible consequences reared their ugly heads in the shadows all around.

  What if Dominic told the grand duchess what had been going on? What if the czar should learn about it, and cast his disobedient ward off? What if William should bow to his father’s wishes, and marry Lord Penshill’s daughter? What would happen to Sophie Arenburg then?

  Dominic’s intentions were not yet apparent, for as soon as William was taken care of, he’d retired to his own apartment without saying anything more, but there was no mistaking his anger with the young lovers. Camilla had no idea what he meant to do, but her own decision to write to Elizabeth remained unchanged.

  She sat at the writing desk in the drawing room, trying to compose a letter that wouldn’t cause William’s anxious sister any undue alarm, but Sophie’s restlessness made it difficult to concentrate. In the end Elizabeth was merely informed that William had hurt his ankle at Summerton Park and wished to see her.

  It wasn’t strictly true, of course, for William hadn’t expressed any desire to see his sister, but Camilla felt it was the best way to break the unwelcome news that the future Earl of Highnam had put matters in jeopardy by breaking his word. She wished she could add that all was well, but that would have been a patent untruth.

  At last Sophie’s agitation proved too much. “Sophie, if you don’t sit down I vow I’ll go to my apartment as well and leave you to it!” she said, holding the sealing wax to the candle.

  Sophie turned anxiously. “Oh, no, Lady Camilla, please do not do that. I—I could not bear to be on my own now.”

  “You’ve lied and taken advantage so much that I’m quite tired of you, and I’m certainly no longer in any mood to be tolerant. Please sit down.”

  The sealing wax dripped softly on to the folded letter, and then Camilla pressed her signet ring into it. The ring bore Harry’s crest, and she glanced instinctively toward his portrait.